Avatar of Astronaut Jones
  • Last Seen: 5 yrs ago
  • Joined: 9 yrs ago
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    1. Astronaut Jones 9 yrs ago

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8 yrs ago
Current wow... Kubo and the Two Strings is a masterpiece!
2 likes
8 yrs ago
I'm still waiting for an Avengers scene where a bad guy tears through an Iron Man suit thinking it's Stark, when it's really Bruce Banner, who then proceeds to go Hulk Smash on a mfer.
8 likes
9 yrs ago
Korgoth of Barbaria, the greatest cartoon that never was...
1 like
9 yrs ago
Pet Peeve: When you're trying to watch a movie that the SO picked, but she doesn't pay attention and asks you a question about the plot every 5 minutes....
3 likes
9 yrs ago
Everyone is excited (deservingly so) about Star Wars VIII, Dawn of Justice, and Civil War... but I'm beyond hyped for the return of... Samurai Jack!
6 likes

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Snoria City Slums - Bazaar - Eastern District


It was hard to keep a clear head in these parts. The cultivated langue within the bazaar's melting pot teemed of bargain bandits and hagglers. Buyers attacked vendors in droves. They shouted, pointed, and negotiated in a whirlwind of dialects, but despite the language barrier, they all seemed to understand each other - or at the very least, follow an unwritten protocol that didn't escalate to violence. It was like a gathering of thirsty animals, pushing to get their taste of the watering hole by scoring the sweetest deals they could find. Fifteen minutes ago, Luke was people watching from a distance, criticizing the whole fiasco and the drama that came with each business transaction. That was until he saw a Holovid vendor carrying one of his favorite TV shows of all time; a complete remastered VR collection of The Adventures of Astronaut Jones. The mother of all pearls.

It was a popular show in the rim about an over-the-top Astronaut that had the demeanor of an early 20th Century Earth male. He drank pina colodas and knew Space Fu, but always seemed to slap one alien in every episode, very hard in the face.Jones was also an anthropomorphic frog. Life in the rim was hard for an orphan, and Luke was no exception, but Astronaut Jones was the one constant in his life that provided a temporary escape from it all. In Luke's eyes, that piece of nostalgia warranted purchase - at a reasonable price.

"You must not be from here!" The vendor shouted, waving the large hard drive containing all of Astronaut Jones' wild adventures at Luke's face. "I can only cut down to 120 cred. 120 cred only!"

"Bullshit. You sold half that for The Live Free Die Tomorrow or The Day After collection to that Javi jargon-er. That shit is worth double what you're trying to sell me." Luke's 6'4" muscular frame towered over the little Snorian fellow, but the vendor wasn't intimidated in the least.

"120!" The vendor folded his arms. Out of nowhere, a ragged looking man with beady sunglasses squirmed into view and raised his hand.

"I'll buy it for 120!" He said.

"Like hell you are!" Luke elbowed the man out of the way, almost knocking the sunglasses off of his face. "I'll raise the bid by 10."

The vendor looked at the man, who shrugged and casually walked away. "Sold." The vendor flashed a jagged smile. Luke swiped the hard drive from the man's hands and handed over the Snorian currency. As he left, he looked back and noticed that the sunglasses guy reappeared in front of the vendor, who was now giving him a cut of Luke's payment.

"Oh you've gotta be shitting me." Just as Luke was about to stomp back over, he received a thought message from Captain Anson.

<Status check. All operators, update location and readiness.>

"Iceman, in the Bazaar. Eastern District. Ready to roll when you are, over." Luke gave one more look at the Holovid salesman. When they made eye contact, they both cracked a smile. "Touché, you rat bastard." Luke shook his head as he tucked the hard drive into the breast pocket of his blue leather jacket. It suddenly dawned on him that the copy he purchased could very well be a bootlegged version, or something else entirely. Should it come to that, then Luke Galbri will definitely repay the man a visit and slap the vendor as hard as Astronaut Jones would. He decided to stroll through the Eastern District's markets, listening in on the 7-5's dispatch while awaiting orders.
Name: Cham-Cham

Age: 20

Animal: Chameleon

Appearance:

Apprentice to Master...: Viper

Fighting Style: The Flying Mop. This defensive style harnesses Cham's diligent cleaning techniques as a janitor. It implements fluid and purposeful movements to parry, counter, and redirect oncoming attacks.

History: Cham-Cham lived in south China of Gongmen City as a janitor to one of the more premiere Kung Fu studios in town. He loved cleaning and considered it a rare art form. However, Master Yeb was not a fan of how he did things. It came to a point where he threatened to fire Cham-Cham if he did not improve the cleanliness of the studio. Unsure of how to get better, he looked to the martial artists who trained in the studio, taking from them whatever he could to make himself a better janitor. So he watched martial artists by day, and unintentionally developed his own style of Kung Fu by night. The end result drastically improved his cleaning duties, as the studio became a spotless beacon. Viper arrived in Gongmen City months after the Furious Five became the Five Teachers.

Master Yeb, as well as other Kung Fu Masters in the city knew that she was here to find her next successor, so they decided to host a tournament to display their skills. The tournament was held at Master Yeb's studio. Many fighters came, desperately trying to grab Viper's attention with flashy moves. She was fairly disinterested for the most part. Then, at the corner of her eye, she spotted Cham-Cham swiftly cleaning up the training grounds. He had delicate grace and speed, using his mop like a spear to deflect droplets of sweat and blood from touching the mats.

After several hours, Master Yeb emerged as the victor in the tournament. In a sudden twist of events, Viper called for one final match. Master Yeb vs. Cham-Cham. The chameleon was caught completely off guard. He declined immediately, but Master Yeb wanted to prove his worth to Viper and attacked him anyways. Much to everyone's surprise, Cham-Cham defended himself well by dodging and blocking. No one knew such skill existed in a janitor. However, the chameleon never fought back, so the fight ended rather anti-climatically with Master Yeb feinting from exhaustion. Cham-Cham was declared the winner by default. Viper found a candidate, and though it took some convincing, he agreed to travel back with her to the Valley of Peace.

Weakness: Cham-Cham is non-violent by nature and will look to avoid confrontation at all costs.

Misc: His motivation to learn Kung Fu is solely based on improving the way he executes his cleaning duties. He agreed to be a candidate because he knew Master Yeb would never let him work in his studio again. Plus, he always wanted to try Mr. Ping's famous noodles.

The Invading Sun


The great Dragon Warrior and the Furious Five have protected the mystical realm of China for many years. Under the tutelage of Master Shifu, senior trainer of the Jade Palace, Po and company have become rock star legends in the Valley of Peace and beyond. But all good things must come to an end, and with time quickly catching up to them, the legendary six make preparations to train the next generation of Kung Fu masters. On the day of the Winter Feast, Po, Tigress, Crane, Mantis, Viper, and Monkey renounced their titles as The Dragon Warrior and Furious Five.

Everyone in attendance was shocked, even more so when Master Shifu announced his own retirement! Much to Po's surprise, Master Shifu then declared the panda as Jade Palace's new Senior Trainer. Po, though very honored, expressed his concern about taking on such a huge responsibility, to which Master Shifu laughed in his face and said, "Don't be silly. You'll burn everything to the ground if I leave this place in your care." Shifu then turned to the former Furious Five and proclaimed them as The Five Teachers, who will aid Po as his faithful advisers.

With big changes underway, Master Po and The Five Teachers set out to find their successors. They hope to find as many potential candidates as possible before the coming spring, where they plan to host A LEGENDARY TOURNAMENT OF AWESOMENESS to put their skills to the test.

Little does everyone know, a true test awaits them in the form of a mysterious force making its way to China, desolating everything and everyone in its path!









We'll be playing as the Kung Fu Masters in training that will become the next Dragon Warrior or members of the Furious Five.

Character Sheet
Name:
Age:
Animal:
Appearance: (pictures are always welcome. Just remember that your character is anthropomorphic.)
Apprentice to Master...: (Po, Crane, Mantis, Tigress, Viper, or Monkey.)
Fighting Style: (Feel free to be wacky and creative here.)
History: (Be sure to include how any of the Five Teachers or Po found you and selected you as a Dragon Warrior/Furious Five candidate.)
Weakness: (This is important. Does not need to be detailed, but it must be a glaring weakness. Impatient, easily frustrated, cannot concentrate.)
Misc:




Miscellaneous


Kung Fu Panda Short Films:

Holiday Special
Po is to host the annual winter holiday feast and he struggles to meet his friends' expectations.


Secrets of the Masters
Po and the Furious Five uncover the legend of three of kung fu's greatest heroes: Master Thundering Rhino, Master Storming Ox, and Master Croc.


Secrets of the Furious Five
Ordered to teach a martial arts class of rambunctious bunny kittens, Po tells stories of each of the Furious Five's pasts.
Glad to see more interested people!

No worries about seeing the new one. It'll be set into the future and we'll be taking some liberties.

I'll probably get the ooc up in casual if that's ok with you guys. I'll post the link here when I get it running.
No worries. It'll be way into the future and we'll be taking some liberties too. I should get an ooc up by tonight!
I think we just stumbled onto something.... Astronaut Frog and Spy Cat duo here to save/destroy/annihilate/confuse the day!
Nice! Gotta give me your review of it when you do watch it. I heard they've planned to make 3 more films! I've got a thread over in casual you can come check out too.
Thanks Minka! Both of our avatars look like they could be in a goofy sci-fi adventure.
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