Buzzkill

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

Matteo was perfectly content to enjoy the safety of their locally provided toad-skin umbrella, but he was a little curious about what assistance Etramri might actually provide. Since he was a little taller than Ash and it was slightly awkward to hunch under the ranger’s flapping animal skin, he ducked out and reached up innocently for the knight’s hand. If she didn’t break his wrist, maybe he’d actually be treated to a respite from the downpour. If it had been up to him he would have suggested they stop and look for shelter, but Matteo was just a lowly beggar looking for handouts from those much more qualified than him. ”I don’t have a cloak,” he said innocently. The rain probably could have washed the stink off him, but he didn’t care. It was also nice that Muu hadn’t taken the proffered bait, since she was the most vulnerable one. More charity for him! ”I appreciate it.”

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

He chewed. He swallowed. He savored every bite. After all, who knew when he’d get another one? The only thing he found himself wishing for was some bread, though that was a goal far on the horizon for someone capable of actually making money. Too bad. This would make a great sandwich. Then again, maybe bread would make him even thirstier than he already was.

Despite having had little to no part in the victory, Matteo couldn’t help but feel his spirits rising. It was secondhand success, but damn it, it was still a success. They hadn’t died. He hadn’t died, despite being weak and half-starved and brand new at this entire bounty-hunting business. There were benefits to being protected by more experienced veterans at this craft. Matteo knew instinctively that if Gwyn and Ettamri had been there by the little stream when the two goblins had jumped them, the story would have been very different.

His brief high was dashed when the lady knight made it very clear that their day was not over, however. Matteo felt immediately inclined to argue and couldn’t quite catch his incredulous “Another one?” in time before it slipped out. The relief he’d been feeling at having the first bounty over and done with vanished as he pictured going through the experience all over again. Of course, we’re taking a break, but still… He hadn’t been doing anything more strenuous than waving down passerby for the last several days. Just turning back and retracing their steps to Andeave sounded exhausting.

But he’d begged for this, and they needed it, so Matteo hastily rephrased. “Ah, I mean, of course. I’m sure we can do that, don’t you agree?” he glanced casually at Ash (who was collecting toad skin) and Muu (who thankfully looked like a real person again.) “Eating should get our strength up. What direction do we head next towards the, ah, target?” This was his passive way of asking what the next bounty was. He hadn’t expected the experienced duo to actually take them on, so (as usual) Matteo hadn’t done his homework.

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

Wincing at the rashes on his hands, Matteo sawed at the hem of his sleeve with his knife and wadded the torn fabric into the neck of the bottle to stopper it. It wasn’t pretty, but poison didn’t have to be. He stowed it away carefully and looked around. Ettamri and Gwyn were near the injured Muu while she was being healed. It looked like Ash was working on getting a fire started to cook the butchered toad meat. Better than rabbit, Matteo thought, and then wondered how he’d gotten to the point where he considered frog meat to be a luxury. Maybe somewhere around the point where he’d started asking for spare change on the streets.

As Ash built herself a fire, Matteo went around the other side of the toad for some privacy to change out of his rash-inducing, blood-and-toxic-body-fluid-covered robes. The air was still cool with the threat of rain and he shivered as he pulled on his older, neutral-colored clothes. They stunk like alcohol and unwashed beggar, but at least they were harmless. He bundled up the tight blue fabric under his arm, then came around the toad to check on Ash.

He’d been hoping (really hoping) she’d be done by now and he wouldn't have to do anything to help, but it looked like there was still a lot of work to be done. Or more like a lot of toad to be cooked, he thought, eyeing the mountain of frogflesh and Ash’s lone machete. He audibly sighed, then took out his two knives to offer to Ash. "You can use these too, if you want. I'm willing to taste it first if you’re worried about poison.” Honestly he was just hungry, but maybe he had some kind of resistance to lingering toad venom after inhaling toxic fumes back at the Guild, who knew? He'd take the risk.

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

It was done, and with such swiftness that Matteo barely registered the toad's fate as he saw Muu fall, landing face-down in the grasses. At least we’re out of its path now. From afar, only the horrible croaking served as any indicator of their bounty’s demise. Occupied with his unresponsive teammate, Matteo couldn’t see exactly what the enormous monster’s final injuries had been, but it was clear this amphibian would roll no more.

One more thing was for sure: he owed the priest. Just one more debt to add to the pile.

(On a more positive note, a dead toad meant a successful mission. No thanks to Matteo, but a win was a win.)

As Gwyn prepared to heal the face-down Muu (who Matteo now belatedly saw had been hit with some kind of acid spray-- of course such a brightly-colored creature was poisonous, that made sense) the Thief cleared his throat. “Ah… excuse me. Thank you, back there. If that had been me, I’m sure I would be dead now.” Squatting down and lowering his voice, he added “I don’t think I ever got your name properly.”

Not wanting to disrupt the helmeted healer’s concentration, Matteo stood up again and approached the body of the toad. Ash was already there, sawing away at the beast’s single remaining eye. “Toxic, hm?” Matteo echoed Ash to himself and walked around the beast’s side, keen to investigate where its red-striped skin had been ruptured.

I’ve never had much luck crafting poisons, he thought as he leaned forward to examine the acid which had apparently melted the Bladedancer’s face. Back when he’d been training with the Thieves’ guild he’d spent a whole day being sick after a potentially fatal combination of toxins had gone wrong. He was no chemist, that was for sure-- but perhaps if he collected some of this, it would prove useful later-- either to sell or as a meager supplement to his own weapons.

After the great wound the lady knight had inflicted, there was plenty of toad fluids to spare. He hoped. He wrapped his hands in the sleeves of his robes to help protect his skin and took a deep breath. Rustling in his meager (nonexistent) possessions, he managed to find the empty booze bottle he’d taken from the other beggars at the gambling ring and did his best to collect a substantial, non-dirt-filled sample.

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

She'd saved him.

Why?

Heart thudding in his chest, the wavy-haired Thief could barely comprehend what had happened for a moment. They'd been running, he'd been wheezing from the effort, pace slowing, body failing him-- and then--

Is she all right?

Stunned on the ground where he'd been pushed at the last second, tall grasses arching over his head, Matteo didn't know.

A storm of hooves and then Ash being tossed towards him was enough to shift his thoughts to other things. Awed by the dual close calls he’d had with first the toad attack and now a flying ranger, Matteo gave a jerk as Ash shouted at him. Secretly relieved that his task of protecting the priest had been taken from him (it hadn’t been his idea to begin with, so of course it wasn’t going to be any good) he looked around for Muu.

“Ah! Right,” he said belatedly to Ash, recovering, and then took off at a stumble and then a full run. Even after their brief rest, his muscles screamed at the effort. He could see Muu’s bright red scarf over the tall grasses and hurried towards it. The bladedancer was walking, at least-- that’s a good sign. “Muu! I’m right behind you, keep going!” he shouted as he drew near.

From here with his nearsightedness (and lack of glasses) the girl still seemed all right. Certainly injured somehow, but not (obviously) disfigured. Still calling out, urging his fellow amnesiac on towards a more toad-free zone, Matteo had to trust the other three would be all right.

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

His heart stopped for a moment as the freight train of pink tongue muscle roared past him, then retreated in another effortless flick. I have to get up before the second-- but Matteo realized there was no time. He made it to a crouch before-- miraculously-- the tongue slapped off an invisible barrier, shattering motes of light from the impact. What?

Magic.

Matteo was surprised only for a moment before he stood. He knew how fast that tongue could strike now-- they had to move. He didn’t even have time to phrase an appropriate Thank you to the priest. The combined attacks of the others struck at that moment and Matteo didn’t stick around to wait for the creature to finish shifting into a giant toad ball-- he grabbed at the priest’s elbow, pulling to the side. ”Come on, this way!” he urged. If she wouldn’t come with him, he’d have to sprint out of the toad’s path on his own.

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

He was vastly out of his league. The word vast lingered in his mind, as it first had when he’d blindly rushed the goliath toad and realized it was both farther away and far, far larger than he’d expected.

At this point he ought to stop expecting things. It never seemed to work out for him.

Matteo felt sweat break out on his forehead as he saw the beast’s maw open and realized in a heartbeat that he was first on the menu. Unconcerned as it was with his antics, that tongue was nothing to dismiss. Continuing to whirl on the spot, Matteo took off again, pumping his arms and legs desperately as he threw himself into a second sprint. His muscles, tired from walking, burned at the sudden burst of activity-- but just two weeks ago, he’d been training in the guild to handle this type of scenario. High pressure. High intensity. If he couldn’t run, he would die, and Matteo was already in too deep to consider becoming toad bait so soon out of the hospital.

In his peripheral vision, the Thief could see the tongue coming. It stretched impossibly long and the curly-haired youth felt his heart drop as the thought I don’t know how far its range is flashed across his mind. How long was a normal frog’s tongue? At least as long as its body? I might not be able to outrun it in time--

Forgetting whatever his piece was supposed to be in this bizarre toad-killing game in favor of actually living through it, Matteo hurled himself to the side and down onto the ground face-first without warning. Bent stalks of grass poked at his face as he flattened himself, holding still and hoping the tall grasses would disguise him. A creature that big probably couldn’t change direction very quickly, and if he could just duck the tongue, it was still possible it might overlook him...

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

Fresh air filled his senses, bringing Matteo a curious sense of discomfort. The wind ruffling his hair should have been invigorating, but all he could think about was how uncomfortable it would be to get caught out in the rain. The unwashed stink of his own clothes and body seemed all the more foul by comparison. Maybe the rain would do me some good after all, the youth thought as he trudged along, tall grass tickling the backs of his legs, and then his elbows, and then his chin.

He forced a smile instead of a grimace as the toad was finally spotted. Perhaps he could talk his way out of this, work out some kind of compromise without appearing utterly incompetent. “Certainly, Muu and I are quite… fleet,” he said, tone pleasant, “But If I may, we could discuss--” It seemed there was to be no discussion. The Thief’s words faded as Ettamri wheeled and trotted off without another word. Peeved, Matteo looked at Muu, irritation briefly passing across his face before he gave the bladedancer another bland smile.

“I suppose we have our… orders, then. Maybe you should stay closer to Sunfa-- er, the priest, since you’ve got the sword.” Resigned, Matteo gave a slight shrug and nodded at Gwyn.

The youth ducked down, letting the grasses part around him as he moved forward towards the red-striped beast. He didn’t bother drawing his dagger, not yet-- if anything, the encounter with the goblins had shown him that he’d just drop it if he wasn’t already fully committed to using it. He hadn’t been told to stab the toad, just to get its attention. He’d just focus on dodging it for now. Maybe it’s just placebo, but the priest’s blessing makes me feel a little less tired. Irrationally, he felt a little stab of jealousy towards Ash for having earned a seat on the horse so soon.

Creeping forward, making as little sound as possible while still moving fairly quickly, Matteo paused, muscles tensing as he nerved himself up. From his place crouching in the tall grass, for the moment he couldn’t see the strange-looking amphibian, nor the warhorse supposedly circling around it. All right. Here we go.

The Thief burst out of the grass, charging the toad as fast as he could before peeling off like a game of chicken. The bright blue robes he was wearing under his breastplate seemed ostentatiously colorful in the gray weather, and would probably draw its attention. He put one hand on his dagger as he whirled to face it again, hoping he hadn’t just made a beginner's mistake.

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

Matteo wasn’t sure what he had been expecting when he’d offered to get down on his knees and beg-- someone to stop him, someone to laugh at him, a simple yes or no-- but the knight’s request (to put it kindly) made him hesitate. He was already down on one knee, fully prepared to prostrate himself so his outrageous request at least seemed to come from a place of humility. Which it was-- in no way did the Thief think he, Ash and Muu were anywhere close to the same tier as the duo he’d approached.

But he had a story to sell. He had nothing to lose. Mocking and humiliation were the least of his concerns-- he had to prove he tried, or he would go down in his friends’ minds as the absolute loser he’d definitively proven himself to be the night before. Literally.

Yet kissing their boot represented an agreement to the knight’s demands, and that made the dark-haired youth pause more than anything else. Torn, his gray eyes flicked down to the boots before back up at the faceless stranger, lingering on their helm. From the build and voice he guessed it was a woman, but it didn’t really matter. Carrying heavy bags deep into the woods, dying for the priest… that sounds…

He wasn’t proud. He was just lazy. Despite having been the one to make the offer, he hesitated now to sign this unwritten contract.

And then suddenly, Ash was there. Matteo jerked in surprise as the ranger knelt and kissed the knight’s boots, sealing the deal and sparing him his indecision. I’m not the only one who’s desperate, he realized, and that his deprecating introduction of the group had perhaps been more honest than he'd expected. He even heard a little please from Muu. He’d dragged all three of them down to his level for this gambit, and for their sake if not his own, Matteo suddenly willed it to succeed.

The chance of success had been so slim he’d barely entertained it when he first approached the pair. Objectively, the odds seemed impossible.

Is this fate, then?

Seeming resigned, Matteo hesitantly mirrored Ash, lowering his head to let his lips brush the knight’s other shoe. An act of solidarity more than anything else. “We’ll do what’s necessary,” he muttered, heart thumping with sudden dread. What had they gotten themselves into? What have I gotten us into, rather?

He rose when prompted by the priest, grateful for her pity, and offered another mild smile. “Thank you both for this opportunity. My name is Matteo, Thief by trade.” He copied the way Etono had first introduced themselves when they’d met. As the priest spoke Matteo felt privately that any and all of the proposed targets were more than the trio had ever overcome successfully, but did not weigh in with his opinion. They were in no position to make demands or suggestions. Not yet.

Altera: Of Departures and Deliverance

Clad in the least dirty thing he owned, his profession’s signature sky-blue, tight-fitting robes, Matteo paused at the entrance to the plaza.

He’d avoided this place for the last week, truthfully, hoping to avoid Old Bear or any others who might aggravate his recently-healed injuries. The Silver Moon soldiers weren’t exactly a charitable crowd, at least not until the sun dipped lower in the sky and it became time for drinking. There had been no reason to come here, save perhaps seeking Hannah and Aoi, but the thief-turned-beggar had no great desire to do so.

Now I have to put my money where my mouth is.

Or put his mouth where his money wasn’t.

All right. Relax. Play it off.

“Let’s see, they ought to be around here somewhere… hmm…” The dark-haired youth held a hand up as if squinting against the light. Honestly, nearsighted as he was, most of the people gathering in by the bounty boards were just a blur anyway. Who looks like a Priest… priest… As popular (understandably) as healers were, what were the chances he could even find one who wasn’t already surrounded by doting party members? “Ah! There!”

Light glinted off a strangely-shaped helm and Matteo made a wild guess, pointing with false confidence. “There she is. Let’s go talk to her. Ah--” He wavered as another heavily-armored figure joined the loner, but his step only hesitated for a moment before he kept walking, sliding through the crowd with single-minded intent.

“Good morning,” the young man said politely, squeezing his way past a few other back-flipping thieves and arriving in front of the duo. Seeing them up close, his heart sank down into his stomach. I’m going to look like a fool. They were both heavily equipped, clearly veterans at their craft with the funds to purchase such items. Who better to help us get money, though?

Marshaling his courage, Matteo gave the pair a modest smile. “I apologize for interrupting you. I’ve seen you both around… you probably haven’t noticed me, of course.” He waved this off and went on, deciding on the spot to do an absolute 360 on his earlier promise to Ash and Muu. If this was going to work, he had to make a strong impression fast. “My two companions and I are desperate cannon-fodder burdened by crippling debt. If you're heading out on a bounty, would you consider letting us come along?”

It was an absolute blind shot, equal parts truthful and bold. Honesty to cover lies. Shame to cover pride. “If begging would help sway your decision, I am happy to do so,” Matteo added earnestly, preparing to get down on his knees. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. If they refused, he could always try someone else.