FrozenPhoenix

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

I'll be honest I noticed that too. So many folks just vanished. Some asking to bow out others just up and leaving... Sucks to be honest.

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

Well I don't feel like I can morally do it and be able to feel good about my self. But here's a hint, the contents inside are very flammable, so get fire inside the can.

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

On a slow day?!?!?! A metric shit ton more than on a fast day... Thing is... if you want to see true creativity and jackass-ery, then get a group of soldiers either really, really drunk, or really, really bored. Then we will seek entertainment with what we have available and all we have available is military equipment, sand, and whatever we order from Amazon wich is generally stupid shit or novelty shit. Wanna know how to turn a can of Silly String in a bomb?

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

Sadly this one isn't as funny I guess...

A long time ago, in a country far, far away we were out in the wilds of war preserving peace and doing the battle with terror-isms. At one point in this mighty adventure we had to field and range artillery. Well we didn't but we were there while the Artillery Specialists did their thing. One of our guys was a tyro to the big guns and just so happened to have to utilize. When the first shot fired he thought it was a joke and they weren't that loud. So he didn't shelter his poor ears from the blast. When it fired he proceeded to shit himself, literally. He tried to hide it, but it's hard to hide a smell like that. So as he awkwardly waddled away we couldn't help but laugh as we shelled the baddies.

He later changed his pants and underwear.

THE END!

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

Well we gotta start somewhere, so what do you want to hear first? I'll take votes.

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

We just call it chow... mostly because we're not sure what it actually is...

But anyway how about those funny stories huh?

What do you just want to hear about...

"The Accounted For Murders."

"Shitting Artillery"

"Toilet Brief"

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

Still tastes like chicken though, which is both weird and interesting... Just looks like total shit.

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

Oh the food is aweful. You have no damn clue just how bad it is. When you get "chicken" that looks like and has the same texture as gravy, something is really, really fucking wrong.

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

Sorry left to get lunch.

I think I get it though, you're civilian but your an Army Brat married to a Navy Boy. What a mix!

Also, I like drugs... (Not literally, but that the funny part of the joke)

Technically speaking Vaping is more healthy for you and it's cheaper, but I still think it's stupid.

Dragons of Caerel [accepting!]

So you're Army too? Cool figured I was the only one, now my stories may not actually be as great as yours... *Sad face*

Though no, must've been in your Dad's time 'cause I can't say I've seen anybody bury a cigarette butt. Granted most folks I deal with use those weird vaporizer things now... You know, "New Army" and all that garbage.