I was going to post this in my "pregenerated characters" thread but thought this deserved its own topic.
In short, my group of two years started a new game with pregenerated characters and I gave it a try, and it went very poorly.
One of the most hurtful things that was said before I left the group was that I shouldn't be allowed to play a female character because I "do so really badly."
This shocked me, and ever since it happened I have been wracking my brain trying to understand what was meant by it. I could just ask the person who said it, but I am A: embarrassed to have that conversation and B: know that if I reach out to open talks with the group I am going to get sucked back into the game rather than making a clean break.
So, in short:
How does one play a female character badly? What are some common pitfalls associated with cross-gender roleplaying?
Now, if anyone wants to know a little bit more about my personal situation:
I have been playing with this group for a little over two years and played the same character the whole time. I felt very comfortable in the RP, but apparently I was doing something that was cringe-worthy or offensive the whole time without me realizing it or anyone else pointing it out to me. Now keep in mind, this is the ONLY character that this person has ever seen me play.
I am the "specialist" type of gamer who likes to play similar characters in every game. In the past 20 years of RPing 9/10 of my characters have been female, and I am personally a lot more comfortable playing a female character than a male one, and I always thought I was fairly in tune with my female side. When I was in college I had creative writing professors tell me I was good at a female voice, software that analyzes the gender of an author usually pegs my writing as the work of a female, my parents are always mad at me for not acting "manly" enough, and in high school when I asked my friends for dating advice they always told me that my problem was that I approached relationships like a girl and needed to learn to see things from a man's point of view.
So, this has kind of shaken my confidence in my ability to RP, and I am now wondering just how bad I am at not only playing a woman but as playing any character at all.
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