KirahFor formatting, this is a good start.
1) Something eye-grabbing or attention-catching: a snippet of plot or an interesting image. This is your hook.
2) What the game's about: bullet-points, as in the examples, are great for this. If you can't condense the concept of your game into bullet-points, I'd say it's not clear enough.
3) What you want from your players.
If you follow the above, you'll present your game in an interesting way, clearly indicating what it's about and who you're looking for. In my experience, if you can't explain in very simple terms what it's about or who you're looking for, you'll get people you aren't looking for who don't really know what it's about (you don't want this).
While I agree you don't want people to be firing into character sheets until the OoC, if you anticipate the OoC might be more than a couple of days, a rough idea of what the character sheet might look like will engage enthusiastic players before they lose interest.
In my experience, always always always make sure you have a set plot from which you are happy to deviate but to which you're ultimately working towards. This gives players the impression that they have wiggle-room in the game, but it stops them feeling that they have to walk the fine line between creatively contributing and overriding your ideas and pre-built plot. Give an idea of where you're aiming for, but leave it open-ended, so players feel like they have a contribution to make while not being overly pressured to drive the thing themselves.
In my book, a 'Rules' section of the Int.Chk/OoC is usually superfluous. People know they're not supposed to Godmod/Powerplay/Etc and you already have the forum's support, as GM, to run your game how you want. A rules section basically makes you look like a patronising dick, in my eyes, unless your game is unconventional enough that you want to insist that people do things a particular way: for example, in a murder-mystery (my bread and butter), you'd want to impress the need for secrecy.
If you're confident in your idea, but don't have enough people to run it - upgrade to OoC anyway. Some people don't check IntChks and would prefer to join a game that looks like it's already going to go somewhere (which is cowardly, but whatever), and you can always bump if you're confident that your current player-pool have confidence in you and will stick around.
Above All:
Look like a competent GM. This means tidy, neat formatting. This means good spelling and grammar in, certainly, the Advanced Section, but also Casual. This means presenting your game in such a way that people who look at your game might say 'hey, this seems like it's actually gonna go somewhere and I wanna stick around for it'. Without the last part, you'll put off people who want to find something to commit to while leaving your game open to people who want to use your project to spin their latest character.
1) Something eye-grabbing or attention-catching: a snippet of plot or an interesting image. This is your hook.
2) What the game's about: bullet-points, as in the examples, are great for this. If you can't condense the concept of your game into bullet-points, I'd say it's not clear enough.
3) What you want from your players.
If you follow the above, you'll present your game in an interesting way, clearly indicating what it's about and who you're looking for. In my experience, if you can't explain in very simple terms what it's about or who you're looking for, you'll get people you aren't looking for who don't really know what it's about (you don't want this).
While I agree you don't want people to be firing into character sheets until the OoC, if you anticipate the OoC might be more than a couple of days, a rough idea of what the character sheet might look like will engage enthusiastic players before they lose interest.
In my experience, always always always make sure you have a set plot from which you are happy to deviate but to which you're ultimately working towards. This gives players the impression that they have wiggle-room in the game, but it stops them feeling that they have to walk the fine line between creatively contributing and overriding your ideas and pre-built plot. Give an idea of where you're aiming for, but leave it open-ended, so players feel like they have a contribution to make while not being overly pressured to drive the thing themselves.
In my book, a 'Rules' section of the Int.Chk/OoC is usually superfluous. People know they're not supposed to Godmod/Powerplay/Etc and you already have the forum's support, as GM, to run your game how you want. A rules section basically makes you look like a patronising dick, in my eyes, unless your game is unconventional enough that you want to insist that people do things a particular way: for example, in a murder-mystery (my bread and butter), you'd want to impress the need for secrecy.
If you're confident in your idea, but don't have enough people to run it - upgrade to OoC anyway. Some people don't check IntChks and would prefer to join a game that looks like it's already going to go somewhere (which is cowardly, but whatever), and you can always bump if you're confident that your current player-pool have confidence in you and will stick around.
Above All:
Look like a competent GM. This means tidy, neat formatting. This means good spelling and grammar in, certainly, the Advanced Section, but also Casual. This means presenting your game in such a way that people who look at your game might say 'hey, this seems like it's actually gonna go somewhere and I wanna stick around for it'. Without the last part, you'll put off people who want to find something to commit to while leaving your game open to people who want to use your project to spin their latest character.
