Avatar of Maxx

Status

Recent Statuses

4 yrs ago
Current I'm bringing Dragon Cave back and no one can stop me.
5 yrs ago
MEEP
1 like
8 yrs ago
I am back into this shit, I guess. Say hello if you'd like.
8 yrs ago
I am one with the force and the force is with me.
1 like
8 yrs ago
I have suddenly become deeply troubled.

Bio

"That's why we must eat the old people first. They can't have that kind of power."


I've been roleplaying for six years, and if I do say so myself I've gotten pretty good. I've been to many roleplay sites around the internet, and for right now I'm happy calling this one home. I write fantasy, high science fiction, and poetry. I'm involved in the Nerdfighteria community as well, making the world suck a little bit less one day at a time. Though sometimes it's rough and incredibly time-consuming, roleplaying has brought me some of my closest friends, some of the most genuinely awesome people I've ever met. This train is still going, and there's no stop in sight! DFTBA.

The Disappointment Club:


"What the fuck did I just read"


We're special-ed special forces, the most exclusive internet club that no one wants to join, and the most thoroughly disappointing group of individuals the world has ever seen (we even disappoint when it comes to disappointing). Together, we're quite possibly the best six friends the internet has know.

- @Junkmail : Living Proof That God is Dead.
- @He Who Walks Behind : I still won't forgive him for what he did to that starfish.
- @Dragonbud : Her Gregory Cosplay is fire.
- @Surtr : I think he's still trying to pimp me... Help.
- @Spoopy Scary : He's Greg.

List of Super-Power Pet Peeves:

-Shadow Powers
-Blood Powers
-Pain Powers
-"Dimensional Storage" Powers
-Spider Powers

Most Recent Posts




Soon, the inside of the tent had careened into utter chaos. The clansmen were everywhere, armed to the teeth and trying to kill all they saw. Fourteen wasn't sure what to do- blocking the door to the tent had seemed like a good idea at first, but now there barely was a tent, and it seemed like the canvas provided absolutely no defense. As Fourteen contemplated the situation, his vision went black, and he felt something pulled over his head and shoulders. He staggered back as he felt the canvas strip tighten and a clansman climb up his back, pulling it tight around his neck. Fourteen could not suffocate, but fighting blind was a terrible idea. Desperately, he swung about, stomping violently in an attempt to keep the clansmen away from him. He felt a sharp pain as a club met his right hip, then another met the back of his left knee. It hurt, but it didn't break stone. Their strikes would start leaving permanent damage if he didn't act.

Carefully, Fourteen reached behind his back, but the clansman was too fast for him to reach. The only way to get him off was to fall backwards, but then Fourteen would be on the ground and his head would be an easy target. Fourteen had heard that blows to the head can cause amnesia, and more than anything he didn't want to lose anymore memories. He had so few left. Another blow came to his right knee, and Fourteen instinctively reached down to his left. He felt cloth, then skin and he clenched his fist hard. A clansman cried out as Fourteen grabbed him by the bicep. He gripped hard, causing a terrible squelching sound, and then he had an idea. Fourteen lifted the man up with all his strength and brought him down over his back like a towel. There was a crunch and a scream as the clansman in Fourteen's hand struck the one on his back, and both tumbled to the ground. Fourteen ripped the canvas off his face, turned, and stomped. There was squishing and crunching, but no screams. Fourteen turned and batted the third clansman's club away. The club went soaring out into the sandstorm and the clansman retreated.

Fourteen turned back around into the tent. Several of the other members of the team were fighting for their lives as the clansmen swarmed in. Fourteen marched inside as Azariah's magishell went crashing through a clansman's head, splattering blood and viscera. A clansman with a spear ran through one of the cuts in the canvas. Fourteen gave the man a hard push in the chest and he went soaring backwards, landing outside somewhere. The spear grazed Fourteen's arm, but it hardly left a scratch. Fourteen turned around, putting himself in the way of anymore clansmen coming from the front of the tent.

"We require a more robust defensive position," Fourteen said over his shoulder. "Who here has knowledge of battlefield tactics or the acquisition of defensive fortifications?"
Reference for Fourteen's roar:




Fourteen crouched silently as the group finished filing in and the representative began to speak. The tent swirled with the chaos of a dozen discordant voices and Fourteen strained to knit together any fragments of conversation. He turned to his right and saw the Yi-gin-sin staring at him. Its eyes, black and glistening, seemed to be glowing with the same curiosity Fourteen saw in the eyes of vultures and starved coyotes. It made him uncomfortable, to say the least, and Fourteen shifted uneasily. The red-haired woman as well, her eyes were filled with disgust as she stared out at the rest of the group. It was as if she were planning how she'd slay each of them, and Fourteen felt even further unease. This woman scared him, as much if not more than the bug-man. Something about her seemed...unstable to Fourteen.

The representative began to speak and Fourteen listened intently. Deep within, he felt a ribbon of hope weave through the darkness. Exusia. He was going to go to Exusia. Even before completing the quest, he would get the chance to see the legendary city for himself, the city that might hold answers to who he was and why every waking moment filled him with unease and dread. Surely he would be able to learn at least something while he was up there for so short a time- anything would help. When the woman finished, Fourteen nodded. He had no weapons to declare. In fact, he had almost no possessions at all, save a small rucksack thrown over his left shoulder. As the ritual began, Fourteen rose with a crunch and walked to the chalk circle drawn on the floor. He took a deep breath, the stones of his chest shifting, and closed his eyes, ready to ascend to the city in the sky.

Then the moment of peace ended with a spear through the gut. Fourteen’s eyes snapped open as the canvas tore and the bone clansmen set upon those inside. Fourteen had met these men before, the men who wore bones as clothing. In a different city of the desert, they had attacked him, swinging about hammers and crying out “Monster! Monster!” They were violent, vicious men by all accounts, and their actions here had proven this. Fourteen wheeled around as the front flaps of the tent burst open and two clansmen entered. One wore the skull of a horse and armor made of rawhide flaps. The other wore the vertebrae of a snake around his neck like a scarf and rib bones sticking out from leather pauldrons. The man with the horse skull lunged forwards, and before Fourteen could act the man plunged a spear at his stomach.

The spear collided with a dull “thunk!” and, a split second later, a snap. The clansman had struck before he had even seen what he was hitting, and as Fourteen rose to his full height the man’s eyes grew wide in the holes of his skull helmet. Fourteen grabbed the shaft of the spear. He squeezed, and it shattered in his hand.

“I do not believe violence is your best course of action,” Fourteen said as he stepped towards the two men. The other man, the one with the bone scarf, brandished a stone club. Fourteen turned to face him, and the man’s eyes turned from shock to anger. Fourteen knew then that there would be no diplomacy.

“Get out of my desert!” the man shouted. He lunged with the club. Fourteen blocked with his forearm. The man struck again, hitting the underside of the forearm with a twisting strike. The blows hurt, but Fourteen’s forearms were the thickest part of his body besides his torso- they were designed to be armor. The man with the horse skull dropped his broken spear and charged Fourteen bare-handed. He struck Fourteen with his shoulder in Fourteen’s midriff, some attempt at a shoulder bash. There was a crack, and the man released an audible groan. The man with the club swung again, this time colliding with Fourteen’s elbow. There was a small popping sound, and pain shot up Fourteen’s arm. Fourteen stepped forwards, the tackler struggling and failing to impede his movement. As the club-man wound up, Fourteen wound up a sweeping punch. The two swung one after the other, but Fourteen’s fist collided with the clansman first.

The punch of a golem is legendary throughout Deadwood. It is said they can shatter stone and knock down trees with a single blow. An old legend goes that many thousands of years ago, a mountain king used golems to carve a tunnel through a mountain using their sheer power to disintegrate the rocks. Much of this is hyperbole, but it is to say that if one finds themselves poorly-armored and in a position where they are going to take a golem’s punch, their best course of action is to begin fervently praying for a peaceful afterlife. This bone clansman had not heard this lesson, or perhaps he simply did not believe it. But, as Fourteen’s fist collided with his left shoulder, he learned it well. The impact sounded off with a meaty thwack and a crunch as the clansman’s collarbone exploded. The force of the impact traveled through his body, bursting blood vessels and twisting his body like a ragdoll. Essentially, it was as if he had been run over by a car. He screamed, and then the scream went silent as he fell face-first into the sand, though whether dazed or dead Fourteen did not know.

Fourteen stepped forwards, stepping on the fallen man’s leg as he did and hearing a crunch. Outside, he could see more silhouettes approaching, but he could not decipher them. Their silhouettes were sharp and asymmetrical, and everywhere they went the sound of stone and steel clashing could be heard. Fourteen looked down at his elbow- there was a small hairline crack where the clansman had struck him. It wasn’t a serious injury, the equivalent of a scraped knee for a golem, but it stung nonetheless. Fourteen assessed that he could continue fighting if it was necessary. He stepped to the door of the tent, his whole body blocking the entrance. He raised his head high, opened his mouth, and roared. The sound was harsh and mechanical and impossibly deep, like a rock grinder. If these men sought to stand in the way of Fourteen’s answers, then they would be obliterated.



The sun beat down pale and grey and hot, bleaching the land beneath it. Dust swirled half-heartedly along the white sand, accumulating on pillars of rocks and piles of bones. In the distance, dunes stretched like mountain peaks, their slopes littered with eviscerated corpses long ago picked clean. Upon one such slope, a donkey lay sprawled, one leg snapped and bent under its flank. The creature’s breaths were slow and hoarse, and with each it inhaled as much dust as air. Its grey pelt was mangey and dotted with wounds, some still fresh, others faded to white scars. A shadow passed over the donkey, then another. It blinked, but blinking brought its eyes no respite from the endless dryness. It could only imagine what dark shapes swept down towards it from the sky above and dug sharp talons into its leathery body.

The vultures descended like a cloud, ripping and tearing at the quivering beast’s flesh as it clung to the last threads of life. They squawked and fussed as their claws and beaks ripped back the flesh of its wounds and began to tear at what little meat was left inside. The donkey tried to cry out in pain, but it could barely lift its head and only dust welled up from its throat. A vulture looked towards the donkey’s face. It cocked its head, and then with a swift peck, the donkey’s vision went black.

Nearby, the sand shifted. There came a great pounding, a boom that made the layer of dust that coated the desert jump. A second later there came another thump, then another. One of the vultures lifted its blood-soaked face from its meal and cried out in fear. The others turned instinctively and spread their black wings in intimidation, perhaps expecting some jackal or other desert beast had come to scare them off their kill. When the creatures saw what was coming, though, they all cried out as one and leapt from their feast to save themselves. One lone vulture, its face too deep into the donkey’s guts to hear, did not move, and soon it felt a great weight rest between the wings of its back. The weight clamped down on it with an unstoppable certainty. Before the creature could cry out, it felt itself lifted and it soared through the air under a foreign power. It cried out as it crashed face-up into the sand.

As the vulture blinked the blood from its eyes, it saw the form of its assailant. Before it stood a gargantuan man, if you could even call it a man. It was taller than any man the vulture had ever seen, taller than most of the great beasts that made their home amongst the dunes of the Bone Sea. Its hand was the size of the vulture’s entire body, and its body was so large it blocked out the sun from several paces away. From beneath a brown hood, a face of stone stared down at the vulture. It was round and slightly lopsided, with a firm, square jaw and two glowing round eyes. The massive man took a step towards the vulture. The entire desert seemed to shake with its weight. Before it could take another step, the vulture absconded, half-flying, half-running away until it took off into the empty sky.

Number Fourteen looked down at the beast before it. Having been sufficiently tortured, the creature had finally died, dust coating its snout and blood coating the rest of it. Seeing macabre things like this made Fourteen feel grateful he was not made of organic material. At least when he died, if he ever did, his remains would be left unscavenged. Such cruelty living things had for one another. Slowly, Number Fourteen scooped handfuls of white sand from the dune and covered the donkey, hiding the torment that had been wrought upon it. Number Fourteen knew his actions were futile. Something else would find this creature, and something else would reduce it to bone like everything else around here. But, as Fourteen saw it, everything was futile in the Bone Sea, and doing something felt better than letting the vultures have their way. Soon, the beast was covered, and Number Fourteen moved on, trudging across the dead landscape towards the south, where the Bone Waters glittered on the horizon like a desert mirage.

Slowly, Fourteen made his way across the landscape, encountering nothing but skeletons and sand. Occasionally, he would stop to admire a succulent, some shriveled agave or thorny cactus that managed to somehow eek life out within this blasted landscape. Fourteen felt no kinship with life— whether he was even alive to begin with was a question best left to philosophers. But having seen such suffering in this expanse of the damned, Fourteen couldn’t help but find any life at all curious. He knew not to touch the plants; he had learned from experience that even his lightest touch would break them. He traveled slowly, each step looking like a labor and accompanied by a tremendous thud that made the coating of dust upon the sand jump.

Eventually, the camp came into focus on the horizon. Above it by some distance, Fourteen saw the city of Exusia for the first time, its tremendous spires and steeples apparent even from the ground. When he saw it for the first time, Fourteen stopped atop the dune he was climbing and stared for a long time. This was it, the place Henrich had told him about. This place, this city in the sky, was where Fourteen had come from, at least according to the old man he had met on the road outside Orthos. Here, Fourteen could find out all he had wanted to know. He could finally find out how he came to be and, even more importantly, his purpose for being in this world. Within his chest, a dullness ached. It was ever-present, a thump like a heart of dread that left Fourteen drained and deeply unhappy. Maybe now, he thought, the thumping could finally go away.

Fourteen approached Hope Passage from the north, trekking across the desert at his own leisurely pace. As he walked a field or so away from the road where pilgrims gathered, he could feel eyes on him. None of those creatures on the road had ever seen something like him— Fourteen had traveled long enough to be sure of that. With each thud of his footsteps, he heard people gasp and saw them point. He made no effort to communicate with them. People...didn’t like Fourteen. They thought he was one of the monsters that lurked in the desert and ate men whole and alive. Looking down at his massive, rugged form, Fourteen supposed it was a logical conclusion.

The crowd parted as Fourteen lumbered to the front gates of Hope Passage. As people moved out of his way, Fourteen could hear them mumble to one another. “What is that thing?” One mumbled. “Should we run?” Said another. Fourteen ignored them. The guards at the gate to the small tent city stood with their legs quivering and their spears pointed forwards. All around them, folk clad in rags knelt and held out their hands in desperation. Some cried out for entrance to the town, others simply for bread and water. As the guards’ attention focused on Fourteen, a shriveled old woman in a shawl tried to slip through the gate inside. She was met swiftly by the boot of another armed guard who rounded the corner. As the guard glowered down at her, the woman hissed and spat blood from her now-bleeding mouth. This guard had a sword at his hip and a pretentious look on his face.

“You there,” he shouted. “Golem.”

“You know... what I am?” Fourteen replied. His voice was slow and impossibly deep, like if the crunching of gravel was made into phonetic sounds.

“Yes, you,” the guard replied. “No one comes in without an invitation. Show yours or be on your way elsewhere.” The crowd watched on, fear and fascination mixed into one. They mumbled to themselves once more. “A golem? I didn’t think they existed!”, “Now how are they going to keep that from getting in? It’s HUGE!” Fourteen nodded and reached for the sack slung around his left shoulder. He untied the top of it and gingerly pulled a crumpled-up piece of paper out of it. The paper had been given to him by Henrich. It was the only thing the old man had given him in their brief time together, in fact. The guard with the sword took a look at the paper and nodded. The other two, legs still shaking, stepped aside, and Fourteen placed the paper back into his sack.

“Thank you,” Fourteen said as he passed through. He walked towards the center of the camp, receiving the same looks as he had from the crowd outside. The soldiers and travelers stopped their chatter and stepped aside as Fourteen loped past. He knew not to make eye contact— people got...uncomfortable when Fourteen made eye contact with them. Fourteen wondered about that a lot. Perhaps it was his lack of a smile, for try as he might his grim stone face would not change expression. Eventually, Fourteen arrived at the main tent and pulled back the curtain.

He had to duck to enter, and when he did he saw almost a dozen others were already inside. Fourteen towered over the rest of the folk inside, so much that his head brushed the roof of the tent and he had to slouch to avoid scraping against it. The folk inside were of many races, most of which Fourteen had never seen. A man with tanned skin and blonde hair stood in one corner next to a horse and a small girl. Near the entrance a large man with a disturbingly large axe laughed with a bug half Fourteen’s height. Fourteen shuffled into the room, stepping carefully to avoid any chairs or people or tables. The indoors were not made for Fourteen— he always bumped into things and sent people flying and objects falling. He was able to move into the corner to the left of the tent opening without causing any harm. For a moment, he eyed a wooden chair, but Fourteen knew no chair in all of Deadwood could hold his weight. Instead, he squatted down, resting his elbows on his knees and trying to look inconspicuous. He was silent for a long beat, expecting everyone to turn and look as they always did. He looked down at the sand beneath them, not making eye contact with anyone.

“Um, hello.” he mumbled.

So despite introducing the totally-not-kenku, I will not be playing a totally-not-kenku. I'll have the race up tonight and the sheet up...sometime later.


What say you, oh Allen-san?
I'm gonna leave this here:








Artemis II: Aviation gin, Martini and Rossi Vermouth, lemon juice. Garnished with lemon peel and an olive.

Apollo XI: Grand Marnier, Lunar sparkling wine, orange juice, grapefruit juice. Garnished with a 3D-printed moon.

Apollo XVII: Blue Curacao, grenadine, white creme de cacao. Garnished with an American flag.

Gagarin: Polugar Single Malt Rye, cucumber, saline, lime juice. Garnished with spiralized cucumber.

Laika: Salgnac Cognac, Grand Marnier, lemon juice. Garnished with orange peel.

The Space Race: Tito’s American Vodka, Blue Curacao, limeade, grenadine ice cubes. Garnished with maraschino cherries.

Sputnik: Beluga Noble Russian Vodka, Bailey’s Irish Cream, House-made red velvet powder. Garnished with a 3D printed model of Sputnik.

Voskhod II: Beluga Noble Russian Vodka, Goldschlager cinnamon schnapps, Lunar sparkling wine. Garnished with gold leaf on the rim and a 3D-printed astronaut helmet.

Voyager II: Tito’s American Vodka, ginger beer, lime juice, butterfly pea flower tea. Served in a transparent mug and changes colors as you swirl it. Garnished with a golden record.








- Armstrong LAL (Lunar Amber Lager)
- Hey Diddle Diddle Luna Milk Stout
- Moon Dog Lunar IPA
- Olympus Mons Martian Red Ale
- Samuel Adams Cosmic Sour
- Space Worm Double Lunar IPA




- Coor’s Lite
- Stella Artois
- Yuengling







Pinot Grigio — Amphitrite.
Pinot Noir — Amphitrite.
Rouge le Fer — Mars.
Lunar Sparkling Wine — Amphitrite.
White Zinfandel — Amphitrite.


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