Normie

Frokane's Mildly Politcal Hangout Thread

hol up gaiz i got this



libtards rekt

Ecetopia: Rzail: Karnorouri’s Pillar

Ivas

Ecetopia: Rzail: Karnorouri’s Pillar

"Man, there aren't any cute girls around here at all. Or anything, really! Why did I ever think this was a good idea?"

Ivas was only talking to himself as he wandered the wastes of Rzail, but since there was literally nothing else alive in this land, he might as well voice his thoughts aloud. Journeying to distant lands for glory and booty was only a good idea if there was actually any glory or booty to be found in the distant land, and it seemed like he had picked the short straw when it came to far away lands. This place was like a desert except instead of being hot, it stank like death everywhere. Ivas wasn't sure which kind of desert was worse, given that he'd never been to the hot kind anyways. He was just about to sit down and take a rest when he spied a human figure up ahead.... small, with long hair and a bulging chest.... aha! Finally!



"Oh there you are! I mean, uhh, no, I haven't been stalking you or anything, I just mean that--"

Luckily the girl was far enough away that she could not hear what Ivas had blurted out, or so it seemed given her lack of reaction. He decided to just run closer instead of potentially embarrassing himself by ranting on.

"Man, I was starting to wonder if there was anyone else here! Say, what's up with your skin? Are you.... okay? I don't wanna be rude if it's like a personal condition, but--ouch! Hey, that hurts! Let my arm go! Ahh!!"

He smacked her wrist away with Edge's pommel, so hard that her hand fell right off!

"Omigosh, I'm so sorry!! I really didn't know my own strength! Just let me--"

"Urrrgghhh...."

"--woah, I know I hit your hand off, but no biting! Keep those teeth to yourself!"

The girl's aggression, unnatural strength, and failure to produce any speech beyond growls and groans (which were much too low in pitch for her apparent gender and age) were really starting to worry Ivas at this point, but he refused to judge her too quickly. His teachers in school had told him about the evils of racism--if he assumed this girl was a monster just because she spoke another language and had a different skin color, he'd be a bad person! Maybe biting people was just how people say hello in the native culture! Still, Ivas was pretty sure that he wasn't going to get anywhere with her at this rate. He snatched up the detached hand while giving her his best puppy dog eyes as an apology, which had no effect as she lunged clumsily for his jugular vein.

The boy dodged her freakishly wide mouth, accidentally tripping her in the process and causing her to faceplant into the sand.

"Grrrr...." she moaned, her unnatural voice muffled by a mouthful of earth.

"Ack! Sorry, sorry again, I promise that was an accident. I'm gonna find a cleric or something to put this back on you. And hopefully that can translate your growly language too! I swear I'm really a nice guy once you get to know me! I always respect women!"

He took off across the dead sands, halfway panicking since he really had no idea where to go or how to find anyone that could help. So far Ivas had definitely done more harm than good in this land, maybe he should have stayed with his own people and not tried to appropriate his culture into another one.... at the very least, though, he had to fix up the green girl somehow! In the far distance, a tall, tower-like object rose up from the ground, dark and foreboding. It was the only notable terrain feature anywhere at all that Ivas could see, so he made for it, praying to the gods that it marked some kind of village that he could trade with or something.

The Magical Planet - Ecetopia - Open

Kolhatu sighed. Not that anyone could hear him. The great god-king had been reduced to this.... a spirit trapped in the sword of this foolish young whelp, wielded for the most trivial of purposes, things for which a mere twig would have been equally suitable. Last week Ivas had used his blade's shapeshifting powers to snag an old lady's kitten out of a tree where it had trapped itself. Yesterday, the boy had gone around town spearing pieces of trash and depositing them in their proper bins, having learned of the crime of "littering" and developed a fresh obsession with it as the best way to "help society." In Kolhatu's day, warriors did not concern themselves with such lowly tasks.

The spirit of the ancient emperor almost wished that he had never sealed his essence away in the ancestral blade, but it was the way of his people. How could he have known that his would be the last generation before the Great Corruption sealed him off from the world for over nine thousand years? Now he and the magical sword that he resided within were the only thing left of a once great and mighty civilization. His power was supposed to be wielded by a worthy successor to the throne, not some idiot from another era! To make things even worse, for obvious reasons, Ivas had never undergone the proper ritual ceremonies to be able to commune directly with the spirit in the blade. The boy was none the wiser regarding the true nature of "Edge," as he had named his "cool sword."

Kolhatu had made peace with all of this, for the most part, but as a warrior at heart, he still thirsted for battle, for blood, for a true struggle and a worthy foe whose flesh his steel could rend. He would not be satisfied serving as a glorified gardening instrument (as today, Ivas was using him to trim the town's hedges free of charge, a "heroic service" which the local mayor found equal parts helpful and amusing). He needed to make Ivas go to Rzail, the land of strife and undeath, where monsters and demons still walked.... yet no matter how many times he planted visions of the place into the boy's dreams, it was to no avail. The best he could get out of Ivas was a "wow, what a spooky nightmare!" upon waking. Perhaps he needed something to tempt the fool, a carrot to hang from the end of the proverbial stick....

That night, Kolhatu tried something different. Instead of just a straightforward vision of the place, he gave Ivas visions of impossibly cute and attractive young girls, accompanied by the assurance that these angels could be found only in the land known as Rzail. Among his ancestral people, it was said that any warrior who died in glorious combat would be awarded 72 virgins upon ascending to heaven afterwards, and Kolhatu had seen how effective such a promise was in spurring men to hurl themselves into certain death. Some had even been known to use their own bodies as fuel for explosive magical spells in their eagerness to hurry along to this heaven. As god-emperor, he had known that it was of course just a ruse, but if it had worked on them, it would surely work on this rube.

My Hider

Ivas awoke practically drooling with the dream still fresh in his mind. He had never imagined that such beautiful creatures could possibly exist!

"Go to.... Rzail? Well! I guess I'm off on my first real adventure. This time there'll be a princess at the end for sure, four of them even!"

The orange gemstone containing Kolhatu's soul blinked in approval, the warlord himself being equally excited by the promise of once again experiencing a true battle. Even better, Ivas might die in battle so that he could get picked up by someone more worthy!

Let The Blood Run Rampant

Yeah I'm joking around when I say I'm on offer as a judge (although I totally will do it if you let me, I should never be trusted to judge one of these things seriously).

Let The Blood Run Rampant

Best strap up your boots. We're going to throw hands real soon.

@Alexei

Oh we done thrown the gauntlet down now. Clearly the only way to settle this dispute is with a T1 fight. I am on offer as a completely impartial and respectable judge who will make entirely reasonable calls, of course.

Let The Blood Run Rampant

Nonono. They must build up the dramatic tension first.

Hi, I'm Roen

<Snipped quote by Normie>

Pls why

@SgtEasy

you should join too my dude i think its in casual roleplay it is super cool you can get lots of special power if you donate to the server

Hi, I'm Roen

hey m8 we have a dope minecraft roleplay going on if you want to play and donate to the server there's only 2 people right now but i'm sure that if you join then it will be really fun and i can donate you one of my skeleton girl skins as well okay

Howdy!

the behest of tristwich and kahlan hrm

what about me