• Last Seen: 10 yrs ago
  • Joined: 11 yrs ago
  • Posts: 402 (0.10 / day)
  • VMs: 0
  • Username history
    1. TheBiddz 11 yrs ago

Status

User has no status, yet

Bio

User has no bio, yet

Most Recent Posts

The harpoon hurtles through the air towards the ogre. The ogre moves over to the side in a quick step, but Kholodny smiles, as his movement carries him on in his loop, he tugs hard on the chain, causing the harpoon to sail past the ogre and continue on in a circular motion, wrapping around the beast. "Oh yeah, now you're done." Kholodny breaks the chain on his arms, leaving the ogre bound, but not for long. Being wrapped up by Khold's harpoons is a death sentence, plain and simple. As soon as the chains make contact with the beast's skin, it begins freezing at an incredible speed. Like a wave of death, it spreads over the beast. The ice covers the beast head to toe in ice in less than five seconds, barely enough time for it to realize that the ice burns and start screaming. The ice goes over its head, freezing the last yell the monster would try and let out.

"Well, that was surprisingly pathetic." Kholodny remarks. He walks up to the beast and straight up slugs it, shattering it to the last molecule. "And that's that I guess." He grins, and then wrinkles his nose. "What the hell is that smell?"

He turns to his right to see thick billowing black flames. "Oh are you fucking serious? Who set the world on fire!?" This is fantastic. Well, let's head off to see whats going on-

*CrrrrRRRACKA BOOM* A few miles away from Kholodny, massive space ships appear out of what appears to be some sort of dimensional void. "Oh you're kidding me! I do NOT have the desire to put up with this right now." Kholodny sighs and looks around himself. "Okay, fire or space armada? Fire or space armada? Possibly some kind of fire spider devil spawn, or an army from space. God these choices suck. Ummmm." He shivers and zips up the jacket all the way to his chin. "I guess space army? I dont really want to deal with a fire spider so..." He grimaces and begins walking ever so slowly over in the direction they came from, making sure to stay behind everything he can, as to not be seen.

He thinks about it for a second. "Wait thats dumb! I don't want to deal with them either!" He immediately turns around and begins moving the other way. Fuck dealing with space soldiers.
Wow, the Webs got kind of busy all of a sudden!
Yeah, its generally agreed upon that Freedom is OP for an intermediate.
LeeRoy would be INFINITELY happier if you made a supersoldier instead of a tank. Hooo boy, let me tell you.
I hope you're happy Boerd. I told LeeRoy on Skype that I agreed with you that Doomguy would get wrecked at Intermediate tier, and now he's vomitting information at me to try and show me the error of my ways.
Boerd, wanting to get out of a Magic Swordsman rut is all fine and dandy ( I say that, having a swordsman character). How good of a tank are you planning on making it? It would have to be an extraordinarily advanced tank
Maxwell's face hardens, those chiseled features looking like they really are made out of marble. "Why'd I bring back train whistles? Why the fuck would I not bring back train whistles? I don't remember your ass giving me a shopping list. If you were awake this whole, you could've said something, and I would have picked up supplies for you while I was out. But you didn't. So I got my food, and I saw some train whistles that I bought. Now, I'm going to weld these to my gauntlets, and name my fists the Pain Trains. You can't imagine how long I've wanted to use that joke." All of this is said with a completely straight face. No hint of a grin or anything.

"Also, now that I'm back and have MY shopping, you can go shopping on your own. Because I can't be bothered to help you while I'm hungry. I need to go through a hell of a lot more calories than normal people, so all of this food actually is useful. If we run into something strong, and I get hungry, well we're shit out of luck. I don't know what my caloric output is, but it's huge. So you can eat a dick." Maxwell takes a strip of well marbled meat out of the pouch and just puts it right in his mouth. "Mmmmm, that's really good." He chews happily, the meat actually cooking inside his mouth. One of the side effects of having the Purging Flame inside of him is that his body heat is off the charts. When Maxwell bleeds, he bleeds hot. Like, boiling hot. And the inside of his mouth is easily over 400 degrees, cooking things as he chews.

"However, we'll get no where from being rude, so while I won't help you with shopping right now, I will do things to the best of my ability here. Give me a list of things to do, and I will try to fufill it as I can. I would like to not be here for very long." Maxwell does this out of necessity, not kindness. If he didn't need LeeRoy's ship, he wouldn't hesitate to get into a sass battle/dick waving contest with LeeRoy. He can sass with the best of them.
Naw, ships are cool. Fighting a ship, not so much. Not many characters can just LAUNCH themselves into space.
I honestly don't know. Dr Strange IS an example, but any character at that level has been denied, from what I've seen.
THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP Listen to the majestic Maxwell in full sprint. The power feet sinking into the sand and then blasting off with the force of a jet. Truly a majestic creature.

So, how's it going? Yeah? That's good. Kinda just passing time here. Even at 100 mph, running through thick sand and heat, this is a potentially long trip.

Which is why we're going to skip some time here. During the next three hours, Maxwell just continues to churn sand behind him, occasionally tossing remarks through the window to LeeRoy. "So, what exactly are we looking for?" "How in the hell did you end up here anyway?" The like. Not that he's REALLY interested in having a conversation because LO AND BEHOLD

As soon as he asks where LeeRoy came from and how he hit him with his damn ship, he spots a....is that? Yes! It is! It's a city! In the horizon, past the dust and the clouds, Maxwell's fine eyes spot the telltale signs of a city! Tall buildings, more tall buildings. Woohoo! Success. As he gets closer, he notices that wow, this is a pretty dense city. Quite a few people, flying cars, spaceships, the like. All in all, honestly a very pretty locale. In the midst of the desert, these people have managed to create a thriving irrigation system, leading to foilage aplenty and plenty of green to offset the shit brown of the sand. Its certainly an improvement.

"Sweet ass. A city. You know what that means. People. And where's the people-" His stomach rumbles incredibly loudly. We're talking like, 80 decibels. Thats like front row of a rock concert. Maxwell laughs. He doesn't know if LeeRoy is sleeping or not, but either way, he probably heard it. "Haha that's right stomach, where there's people there's food. And we haven't eaten in a while."

Maxwell rushes to the edge of the city, unbuckles the ship, and leaves it there as he literally stampedes through the town to find some food. Thankfully, there's really only two types of transportation in this city. Flying cars, and walking. Which means there's plenty of room in the middle for Maxwell's huge ass to not trample on anyone and really, once they feel the vibrations from his 3000 pound frame stomping towards them, they generally get out of the way. Along the way he hears many comments, many of them pertaining to how they've never seen someone quite so large. Yeah, he gets that a lot.

After parading around town for a little bit trying to lock on to the best smell, he finds exactly what he is looking for. A butcher shop. Filled to the brim with a variety of local and exotic meats. But uh, not for long. "Hello there! I would like to purchase everything, please." The butcher can only look at him with a stunned and awed silence, his mouth hanging agape. "No, you heard me right. Everything. Every single piece of meat you have for sale." "O-Okay, but do you have the money to pay for it, sir?" Maxwell looks offended at the question. "Of course I have money! I'm not going to pilfer food from you. I bet you worked hard for that food. That I am now going to purchase and take from everyone who may needed to buy meat today and possibly for the next couple of weeks." Maxwell reaches into the pouch on his belt, that yes, it has in fact been there the entire time, and withdraws a gold bar. "Um, do you guys take gold? It's kind of the only thing I have to pay with me." "Of course sir! Honestly, I'd give it to you for free as long as you didn't punch me. You are a very large individual, and it looks like you can punch very, very hard." Maxwell laughs heartily, thanking the butcher and loading the literal shopsworth of meat product into a gigantic rucksack that the butcher was kind enough to throw in. Smiling happily at the thought of a 100k calorie meal, Maxwell heads back in the direction of LeeRoy's ship, when he notices a little something that catches his eye.

It's an antique shop! Maxwell loves antiques, because he's found that in his journeys, antiques are far and away the most likely objects to be filled with special powers. Entering the shop, he waves his hand to the kind old lady (If a bit stereotypical) at the counter. She smiles back, and pans her hand around to the many, many antiques in her business. Most of them are completely useless to Maxwell. He'd love to own them and put them on a dresser or a table or something, but this isn't exactly the proper environment for that. One thing that does actually catch his interest is a couple of rusty old whistles. "A-Are those train whistles? What in the hell are train whistles doing on a planet like this? I don't this planet has ever had trains. How peculiar." He buys them. Why? Why not.

Satisfied with all his purchases, he heads back to the ship, this time, actually getting there.
© 2007-2024
BBCode Cheatsheet