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    1. Warpcircuit 7 yrs ago

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can this become the most liked status ever?
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Nadia managed to make it to Coffee Central without an incident by keeping her head down. By then she had gotten a hold of herself by focusing on the beautiful weather and excitement in the air. The wonderful smell of coffee helped soothe her as well, but also reminded her of the classes and work ahead of her. Sighing, she looked up at the menu to see the new in-season drinks available. There was of course, all of the pumpkin spice, but she was hoping for maybe something different. As she sat there contemplating, she kept to the side, not getting in line until she was sure of what she wanted.

Dee drove down the streets with the local rock radio station on. The windows were down. Enter Sandman came on and he cranked up the volume. Leaves danced in his wake, and cats glared at his approach. His speed increased, and for a moment he briefly considered just driving away until he got lost. Of course, he realized, that wasn't really a solid option. There was too much technology to allow him to actually get lost. Sure, he could throw his cell phone out the window. But then he wouldn't know if Circe called. Accursed practicality, always preventing cathartic bursts of random action. But then he had decided on his destination already, and he was nearly there.

He found parking a few storefronts away from Coffee Central and walked down from there. He passed a seemingly stressed out man standing in front of a traditional looking antique shop. He smoothed his hair back, double checking his appearance in the windows before heading in. He knew what he wanted. He wasn't a coffee drinker, himself. And though the scent of pumpkin and spice flavoring was a truly difficult temptation to overcome, he was not about to give in to distractions. Not even the distraction of an incredibly attractive young lady in line in front of him.

Just as Nadia decided on what to get, she started to step forward. However, her eyes were still glued to the menu. Just before she ran into him, she saw a taller dark figure out of the corner of her eye. “Oh, sorry,” She stopped moving, letting her eyes focus on the man in front of her. “You can go ahead,”

”Tah! Of course. Until we meet again, moya priyatel — Nono, not pray tell; Priyatel. Is term of endearment in Russia. Farewell.”

Before Dee had a chance to respond to Nadia, a loud man barged into the coffee shop. His accent was distinctly Russian, and his large coat reeked of Autumn. On various parts of his body were stray pieces of straw, and it was not clear where they had come from. Despite his boisterous first impression, the man quietly resigned himself to waiting in line.

For a moment, Nikita (the man) scrutinized the individuals in front of him; but whatever he was looking for — if he was looking for anything, even — he did not find. He then raised his sights to the menu, and cocked a fuzzy eyebrow in confusion. Although Nikita was more or less acquainted with American culture, he still found some of the finer aspects to be befuddling. What exactly was an Espresso Romano? It seemed that Nikita was also having trouble deciding what he was going to get.

Dimitri was about to respond the the polite, indecisive girl when he was distracted by a loud Russian accent at the entrance. This newcomer had a certain quality of speech that was very direct and not American at all. It reminded Dee of being out if the country. No time to reminisce though. There was a cute girl to talk to, after all. And she seemed to not know what to drink.

”I’d recommend hot ginger tea. You can't go wrong with hot tea on a day like today. Plus most of the coffee drinks are overpriced in these places, anyway.” Dimitri spoke with a crispness to his voice. It couldn't help but bring to mind the phrase happy-go-lucky. ”I'll tell you what. I’ll buy you one. If you don't like it, more tea for me. What do you think?”

The last question was shown to be somewhat rhetorical, as the long haired man stepped up, and placed the order anyway. Everything happened so quickly for Nadia that she had to take a moment to process it. On one hand she really needed the caffeine to keep her going through the day, but on the other, she really couldn’t refuse the stranger’s offer. Especially since he went ahead and placed the order. She turned to take a look at the loud customer who came in, but barely spared a glance as she had to catch up to Dimitri.

“Um, you didn’t have to do that, but thank you.” Nadia couldn’t bring herself to look directly at him. Talking to strangers wasn’t really her forte, but she needed to learn how to. “My name’s Nadia, by the way,” She hesitantly held out a hand, feeling a bit awkward. Hopefully this wasn’t a weird thing to do? It felt like everyone else in the store was staring at her, judging. Even though her ears turned red under her dark hair and her heart pounded, she kept her hand extended.

He smiled and took her hand, and lowered his head as if to kiss it. But he stopped short of actually doing so. Instead he merely lifted his gaze to hers saying ”Enchanté Nadia. My name is Dimitri. But you may call me Dee if you like.” with that he gently lowered her hand, slowly letting go. He then turned, grabbed the drinks, and started towards a table. ”Grab some sugar if you like. None for me though, thanks.”

Nadia was most definitely red at this point. She could feel her face burning. If that’s the response she got, next time, she’s gonna keep it to a simple introduction. Otherwise she was going to implode. To give herself a second to breathe, she turned to grab a couple of the raw sugar packets. Usually she didn’t take sugar with her tea, but it was a new drink and she needed the moment to take a look at her phone. It seemed like she had a bit of time before class. Then she headed towards the table and sat opposite of Dee, keeping her body posture rigidly straight.

Dimitri was not rigid in posture at all. But he was attentive. Her rigidity seemed forced, but after the morning he’d had so far, he wasn't about to let such things sway him from his path of getting to know Nowhere. The tea still needed time to steep, so he spoke up. ”So, Nadia, what do you do here in Erehwon? What does anyone do here for that matter? I’ve only just arrived yesterday, you see. My family lives here. But I have spent the past few years in Paris studying art.”

Now, the tea was ready to drink, so he drank, and prepared to listen. Nadia looked up surprised at the mention of Paris. It was only the most romantic place in the world, so of course topped her chart of ‘Top Ten Places’ she wanted to visit. However, she had a question to answer before she could ask about that.

“Erehwon is a small town, so there’s not too much to do around here.” Even as the words left her mouth Nadia wanted to retract them. Stupid. Anyone with eyes could see that. “I mean, a lot of people are here because they’ve always lived here. Others stay here because they like the small town environment or because…” She stopped herself before she said something even remotely relating to the supernatural part of town. “Uh, because they have family here,” She forced a smile to cover her mistake, but her gaze quickly fell to the cup to take a drink. “But, Halloween is coming up soon. There’s usually a big celebration for that.” There really was much here, but she was trying her best to keep up some sort of conversation. “But, I assume nothing here can come close to what Paris is like. I’ve always wanted to visit, but… Um, what was it like? In Paris, I mean.” Nadia took a long drink of her tea. At this point, she was too preoccupied with trying not to embarrass herself to even think about what the drink tasted like.

Now she had done it. Dee could go on about Paris for hours provided his audience seemed truly interested. But he wasn't going to rush in all at once. Besides, she had brought up an almost equally interesting topic as far as he was concerned. ”That's good to here. Halloween deserves a big celebration. They aren't too interested in it in France at. Too American. Too commercial. And they don't understand Trick’or’Treating at all. ‘Des bonbons ou un sort!’ the kids will say on the rare occasions when kids actually get to try it out. Which means “would you like candy or a spell?’. So that's a plus about being here, I guess. Better than some other places in America where some small-minded preachers are liable to tell you you're doing the devil's work by simply allowing kids to dress up like the little monsters that they oftentimes actually are.”That last sentence was carefully constructed to be noticed by someone who might have ties to the supernatural, while also being incredibly easy to dismiss as just a commonplace opinion. Dee also pronounced his French words with a full accent, which he considered proper to speaking the language.

Here, he paused to drink some more tea before continuing. ”But Paris itself… Astonishing. Vibrant. At times dangerous, but always full of love. It is like the ideal woman made into a city. Everybody in the U.S. knows about Notre Dame, The Eiffel Tower, the famous Opera House and all of these glorious places. Well, I can tell you, that in person they are even more glorious than you will picture them in your mind’s eye. And at the center of it all, a small island district, the Île de la Cité. Shaped like a ship. Or an eye. And of course, it is connected to many bridges. But the oldest bridge that has never been rebuilt is Pont Neuf. It goes all the way across the Seine, and sort of through the Île de la Cité, very near what you might call the corner of the eye. And that corner stretches out below and away from the bridge in a small triangle of grass, and pavement, and ancient trees. In that little park, beneath those elder trees they say that you can receive a holy vision.”

Meanwhile, as Dee and Nadia were discussing their endeavours in their origins and voyages, Nikita was struggling to actually order a coffee from the barista. After what felt like an hour, Nikita finally found himself in possession of something that barely even resembled a beverage. The bottom of a foggy gradient of white and black, and the top had something that resembled an… egg? Nikita hesitantly took a sip of this excrescence concoction, and scowled at the taste. Nikita didn’t often travel to coffee shops, and truthfully, he wasn’t here for the coffee. He still was perplexed by this aberration which he was somehow convinced to purchase.

As Nikita was walking to a seat near the back of the coffee shop, he couldn’t help but overhear Dee’s exposition. He might have ignored it, but his story of the holy visions caught Nikita’s attention.

”My pardon. You speak of holy visions under bridge? One in France, no? There is french folklore story I know of, that tells of an ancient family of magical creatures, traced all the way back to Romans. As story goes, these magical creatures reside in special locations, such as under a bridge, and grant wishes to the ones who seek them out. I have always been, ah-” Nikita cleared his throat “-em, interested by these stories, and yours reminded me of this one.” As Nikita spoke, he stared directly at Dee, and if he noticed whether Nadia was there or not was something ambiguous.

”Say, it sounds like you are not from around here, no? My name is Nick Bollo. It is a pleasure to meet you.” Nikita extended an almost too large hand towards Dee, and smiled heartily.

”And to meet you. Dimitri Calazans. Or Dee for short.”Dee accepted Nick’s hand in his, and shook it firmly.

”Well, I can't say that I saw any goblins or genies while I was there. Unfortunately no mermaids either. Though the stories of them were much more plentiful. Nor did I ever receive a vision. Although, I confess that I did try.” Dee took a sip of his tea and made eye contact with Nadia, hoping that he was keeping her interest, before returning his attention to the newcomer. ”It was the artists who told these particular stories, though. About the visions. They said that the old decadent painters and students from the Latin Quarter would go there and return to create masterful paintings. I guess since they were decadents, the very pious would presume the visions to have been demonic, rather than holy. But then I have never been very pious myself.

Dee then turned quite noticeably to Nadia and asked for her input. ”What about you, Nadia? Have you ever seen any evidence of the supernatural around here?”

Of all the conversations to stumble upon, this one was the absolute worst. Even at the mention of mermaids, Nadia could feel a different kind of panic rise in her throat. However, she did her best to maintain composure. There had to be someway to remove herself from this situation. “I’ve heard rumors of weird things happening, but they’re mainly stories made up by kids to scare each other. But small towns like this always have stories.” She shrugged seemingly uninterested. “The only thing that’s truly supernatural around here is how fast time flies.” She forced a laugh, picking up her things as well as her unfinished tea. “Thanks for the tea Dee, but I have a class to get to soon, so I’d best be off.” She waved at the two still at the table. “Have a good day!” Trying not to look like she’s running away, Nadia walked out of the store, pacing herself and taking deep breaths. She really needed to be better at talking with others.

”Tough break, huh?” Nikita remarked, watching Nadia. He squinted as she left, and frowned. ”I am sorry, I did not mean to chase off your devushka.”

Nikita then chuckled, a little uncomfortably. ”Well, it is as she says. Time really does fly, and I’ll be on my way.” Nikita looked around, confirming that him and Dee were the only ones within earshot. The tone of his voice changed remarkably, and he spoke a lot quieter. ”Listen. You’re interested in the Supernatural, right? I get a, ah, feeling you’ve come to the right town then. If you hear anything, even just some gossip or rumours, come find me. I promise I can make it worth your while.”

Nikita then turned, as if to leave, but stopped in front of the table. He turned back to Dee. ”Tah, one more thing, priyatel. You seem to have traveled around the world, and as a fellow proponent of odd occurrences, I have to ask. Does the name Valon Valerious ring any bells?”

”Don't worry, Nick, I don't think she was my devushka just yet anyway. I’ll tell you, I haven't been away that long, but I feel like American women are a bit odd.” Though, she certainly made an impression. And Dee did hope that they would meet again. ”You some kind of paranormal investigator, I guess. Well, sure, I can let you know if I hear about any hauntings or anything. As for that name: no. I couldn't pick it out of a room full of bad vampire novels.”

So Dee stayed sitting with his tea, Nick walked off with his coffee, and Nadia was getting farther from Coffee Central by the second.
@Doc Doctor

"I apologize in advanced, then."

Garfield appreciated Shrek for a moment, thinking if he had anything to else say before the fight began.

"And fur the record, my names not Puss. It's Garfield. Be glad, for you'll know the name of the undertall cat who ended your life."

Having no more use for words, Garfield summoned his strength. He would not go all out at first, as the last time he did that he turned a man into a supernova accidentally. Instead, he would throw a punch that would've been fairly average for an adult male as a means of testing the waters. Unbeknownst to Garfield, Shrek would easily be able to counter this punch.
@Doc Doctor

"That's it, Shrek. I was gonna get my lalassa and be on my way, but I tell you what. Once I'm done with you, I'll also destroy this entire swamp. For good measure."

Garfield assumed a fighting stance with the velocity of a jetliner. His right foot-paw was set forward, and his hands were balled into fists and raised. As he did this, he began to flex his muscles in an effort to intimidate Shrek. Although Garfield was not wearing a shirt at the moment, several of the shirts in his dresser (located in a different universe, probably) were vaporized in anticipation of Garfield returning and wearing them.

"Last chance to give me the lansanganronpa, or else it's all ogre for you."
@Doc Doctor

Garfield squinted in return, and lowered his paw. He furrowed his brow, seemingly considering Shrek's option for a moment, but then shook his head in disagreement.

"For Fiona? You mean to tell me that you created that lasanye, and not only that, but for some sort of desperate lasagna woman?. I'd say don't make me laugh, but..."

Garfield laughed.

"...You already have. This is your last warning. Hand over the lasango — or else."

This seems interesting. :P
alright we definitely didn't make it

good run boys time to close up shop.
We're still accepting, and we haven't started the IC yet. We'll be accepting for the full duration of the Roleplay though, and it'll be extremely easy to join.

I am going to request that individuals ping me in this thread whenever they PM a character sheet. I am not signed into Roleplayer guild all the time, but I do check this thread fairly often (kind of sad, since it's fairly barren right now.) This will alert me that someone has PM'd me, and that I need to sign in and review your character sheet.

If anyone is hesitant to join because they're confused, then they can PM me any questions they'd like either over RPGuild or Discord. Right now, we're waiting to have one more individual apply before we start the IC thread.







”The scourge escaped to Nowhere, but the huntsman still followed”


A murder in the town over; It could just be a homicide. Another murder in the town over; it could be a serial killer. A ninth murder? This infuriated Nikita. Nine individuals, all of which had families, friends, significant others, and maybe even children. He clicked the remote, and his television set crackled off. He began to walk towards the kitchen.

How unbelievably selfish. He could understand human killers. Homicide was based on something sentimental. It had sustenance. Monsters killed because humans are tasty. They didn’t see a person. They saw an animal for slaughter. They were inhumane. They were irredeemable. They were the animals, and it was Nikita’s job to show them that.

Huh. How long had it been been? It’d been about seven years by now that he had been hunting on his own. That wasn’t that long at all, but Nikita felt like it had been a millennium. He had been hunting to some extent in back in Russia, but that was a lifestyle closely observed and maintained by his parents. This was something different entirely.

Ever since he had graduated from school, about three years ago, his entirely life has been solely about stocks and hunting. He had either spent his day following the news or following a trail, or some combination of both. And he had a lot to show for it. In his room, under his bed, were trophies he had taken from major kill. He had neglected to take souvenirs from his weaker prey; but if that was anything to go by, he has had a wildly successful career. On top of that, Nikita lived very frugally. He was not especially materialistic, although he may lean towards that side when it comes to equipment, and he was an extraordinary investor. If there was one thing that the townsfolk knew about Nikita, it was that he had a special way with money. In the past three years alone, he has increased his capital by a very considerable amount.

His kitchen was spotless but barren. There was hardly even a crumb out of place, and it seemed like it had never been used before. On one wall, next to the sink, was a whiteboard with a calendar grid. Next to that grid was another whiteboard, this one larger and filled with neat handwriting. There were different notes on the board written in Russian, such as “Lunar Eclipse”, “Campers - IIIIIIIII”, and “Ruxbury Murders - IIIIIIII ”.

Nikita grabbed a marker that was on top of the whiteboard and struck another dash next to the word Ruxbury Murders.




Since the Fall Festival was happening today, Nikita decided to volunteer at the town center in order to acquaint himself with his fellow townsfolk. It had not been long at all since he had moved here, and in all honesty he did not have any friends. Before he left his apartment, he made sure that everything in his backpack was in place, and took it with him. If there was one thing he had learned from his hunting, it was that the supernatural waits until you’re unprepared to rear its head.

As he walked from the Olympus Complex to the Town Square, he made a mental note of everyone he came across. Keeping track of a crowd was a good way to rat out the supernatural, as they seemed to have the delusion that a crowd was some sort of cover in which they could do whatever they’d like.

Once he arrived at the Square, he made some small talk with one of the vendors who was setting up a booth. Initially, the vendor had trouble understanding Nikita through his heavy accent, but eventually, Nikita found himself helping the vendor set up the booth. Although it seemed to be standard fare, Nikita got the feeling that this night was going to get interesting.
@Doc Doctor

"I come in peace, jolly green giant. But you have something that belongs to me!"

The fat cat approached Shrek, until he was roughly five meters away from him. Garfield raised a furry paw and directed it, open palmed, at Shrek.

"Give me the lasagger, or else!"


Flashback

music


A man who cloaked himself with a hawaiian shirt and khaki shorts stood inside a room with Garfield, his face plastered with perturbation. In front of him was a table, and on that table was a map of sorts. Instead of the typical parchment one may expect to see when looking at map, there was a series of holograms with glowing red dots in several locations. When he spoke his word choice was hopeful, but his tone was soaked with the a gravity that could shake a planet out of orbit. “Garfield. The Lasagna Locating Apparatus (LLA) is fully functional. It has compiled the location of all the Lasanna’s in the immediate hyperverse, and it has rated them by quality of their manliness.”

“Excellent, Mr. Arbuckle. After my victory over Sebastian, there has been a lack of Lasagga which would satiate the desires of one who is as manly as myself. I will only eat the most manly of lassannag and I will not settle for anything else." Garfield curtly replied. Upon closer inspection, it appeared that the very existence of Garfield's voice within the room had caused the walls to tremor. Mr. Arbuckle had noticed this development, and was nervously glancing at the walls around the room. Garfield would have to be careful to not say too many words, lest his manliness break the LLA.

”I’m afraid therein lies the issue, Garfield. The list which the Lasagna Locating Apparatus has compiled has a total of three lasagna’s in the hyperverse which would satisfy your current palate. The first of which is located within a black hole, and not even your strength could feasibly pry it from the black hole.”

”That is true. For the black hole might require me to use 10% of my total strength to destroy, and that may be enough to destroy the universe wherein the lagasna lay. Your foresight is surprisingly keen, Mr. Arbuckle.”

Mr. Arbuckle chuckled uncomfortably. ”But of course. This next one in interesting, as the second lasasasa is located directly in this room. In fact, it is located within your stomach already. It is possible that you have already eaten one of these three lasignas.”

”Drats!” said Garfield.

”So, this leaves only one lasagna which is still within your grasp.” Mr. Arbuckle winced for a moment before continuing, and the atmosphere of the room became much darker than it already was. ”There is a Swamp in a land called Far Far Away, where the most manly Laasagna to ever exist has been located, it is the one true lasagan...”

Garfield was so taken aback by this, that all of his muscles flexed and he destroyed his shirt.

”...There is a catch. I cannot read their signature, but I can tell that there is a beast of unfathomable power defending that swamp. Garfield, scourge of man, you must be careful while partaking this quest. This enemy is unlike any other you have faced before”

But Garfield was hardly listening, and he was half way out the door by the time Mr. Arbuckle had finished speaking.

Mr. Arbuckle let a whimper ”Please come back safe, Garfield.”


Present

music


Garfield trudged throughout the Swamp, each step loudly sloshing and reverberating throughout the empty swamp. He could smell the tantalizing draw of the composite lasagna, but he was still too far away to have pinpointed his location. As he trudged, he reminisced on the LLA and his conversation with Mr. Arbuckle before leaving. He had not replaced the shirt he destroyed yet, and the cool swamp air bit at his torso like a thousand tiny pin pricks.

Suddenly, his keen cat senses alerted him to the sound of something large roaring in the distance. Garfield’s fighting instinct immediately reared its head, and he used his incredible sense of smell to try and discern what was making the noise. Something wasn’t quite right though, and Garfield could only make out the rancid odor of a foul outhouse. Perhaps Mr. Arbuckle was right, and this really was something that he had never dealt with before.

Garfield turned his head towards the location of the smell, and began to make his way in towards Shrek and the outhouse. His loud trudge through the swamp would surely alert Shrek of his presence long before he arrived.

@Doc Doctor
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