Vortex said
I have come to realise over the past few days that I may in fact be a total asshole. I have been thinking about some things i have said in the past and compared it to other peoples behaviour and to be honest I seem like a bit of a prick.
Has anyone else realised this or something similar about themselves?
I can totally relate.
Every so often I seem to enter periods of being extremely self-critical. While it's impossible to check for proof, I'm fairly certain I'm technically the first person to ever make a "tell me your opinion of me" thread in Spam, which I started when I was feeling bad about myself and wanted to know if other people felt the same way. I asked Spam because at the time I didn't know anyone there too well, so I knew I'd get relatively unbiased opinions as opposed to a bunch of my friends patting me on the back and trying to convince me I'm a wonderful person.
These self-critical periods used to get really bad, but I feel like they're mostly over now. I really don't feel that way as harshly anymore. These sorts of things still do come up, but on a much less intense level. Like, I went from periodic thoughts of "I'm a horrible person who does nothing but meddle in other people's lives while making myself look like a victim just as a desperate cry for attention" to "Do my friends think I'm annoying?" and "I've been acting kind of like a grumpy asshole lately". The latter two are thoughts that have indeed crossed my mind as recently as the past couple weeks. ...The former I haven't thought about since... at least six months ago - probably close to a year. Perhaps longer. Time seems so hard to keep track of where it concerns emotional things.
So uh... I guess if there's anything to take away from my story, it's that you'll probably move past it soon? I think I lost my point halfway through writing this.