Sebastian pulled her close the moment she started crying and slid his arms around her. "My mother is a twisted bitch, Serena. You shouldn't listen to anything she has to say. She's manipulative and cruel, trust me... I know first hand."

He shook his head and kissed her gently, pushing her hair from her face. "Serena, listen to me. None of this was your fault. Anna and Gunner WANTED to come here to court because of my mother and father and the possibility of Gunner's mother finding him was always there. They love you, they would never blame any of this on you. Gunner's mother has been after him since she figured out where he was, the face off was bound to happen and Anna and Gunner both made their decisions knowing what could happen... That's what you're trained for. If you'd been in better shape you wouldn't be pregnant... and I want this baby with you, Love."

He kissed her, "We couldn't have stayed cooped up at court for forever or Academy... sooner or later we'd have had to go out for something and Abigail would have been waiting. This has nothing to do with you... aside from the fact that I love you."

~*~

As the vehicle pulled to a stop Anna stepped out and was struck by the sight before her... An entire Dhampir commune, torn apart. How many Strigoi did this? The size of the commune and the fact that there'd been no Guardians around meant it wouldn't have taken many... Anna ran a hand through her hair, the place was half burned from Dhampirs lighting blazes to scare off the Strigoi... it hadn't worked. The other Elites stepped out of their vehicles as well, there were eight of them in all not including Anna and Jace. She moved through the town and shook her head, nearly everyone was dead and those that weren't were either injured or taken.

"The whole town was wiped out... Reports say there were at least twelve strigoi and that Abigail was among them at the time."

Anna nodded, "Jace said he saw caves, are there any in the mountains near here?"

Thomas nodded, "There are... not far either but we have to expect that this might be a trap. Abigail knew that an attack this scale wouldn't be ignored and she knew you'd come after Gunner. There's a high probability that they're prepared for us..."

They wound their way up the mountain, daylight fading fast, and Anna and Thomas eyed the entrance... Jace stayed in the middle of the Guardians. "I don't see anything... Jace, do you see any auras at all?"

Jace peered past her and nodded, "Yeah... there are four just inside."

Anna took out her stake and nodded, "There are probably corridors and branches of these caves and it's hard to tell which are the right ones... Jace will be able to see where the Strigoi are. We should stay together."

Serena looked up at Sebastian, tears still streaming down her face, "How can I not listen to her, Sebastian, when we are saying the same things?" She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself a little, "Manipulative or not... there's truth in what she is saying...."

She ran her hand through her hair and sighed slightly, "I think... I think I need to lie down... alone for a little while," She looked up at Sebastian, "Just... calm myself a little."

She pulled away from Sebastian and walked into their bedroom. She stopped at the door for a moment before she closed it behind her. She knew if she left the door open that Sebastian would slowly follow. He'd want to comfort her, to hold her... That was something this loved about him but... Right now she just wanted to be alone... She didn't want Sebastian seeing her like this. She walked over to the bed and climbed in, the movie they had been watching was still playing filling the room with noise. She couldn't pay attention to it though, she was just too wrapped up in her own thoughts. She pulled the blankets up to her chin as she stared at the wall, just thinking and thinking and thinking.

It was sometime later that she pulled her eyes from the wall and rolled over, trying to move away from the thoughts. Sebastian had told her it wasn't her fault... But something inside of her said otherwise. Tears were still slipping down her cheeks but she was quieter now, she didn't want Sebastian to hear. Her eyes fell on the stake that Gunner had given her. It just sat on the bedside table where she left it when they returned, wanting to forget about it. It was like it stabbed her through the heart, a reminder that she had failed... That all of this... could have been avoided had she not wanted to prove herself still capable of being a guardian. She stared at it for sometime before she sat up and took it into her hand. She stared at the sharp point for sometime before she pressed it to her wrist and dragged it across her skin, cutting it open. For a moment, the pain overrode everything. The guilt and the sadness, it slipped away for a moment. However, when she finally stopped, she sat there and stared at her bloodied arm and gasped. She had multiple jagged gashes on her wrist, all of which were bleeding profusely. She tossed the stake across the room and shook, bringing her hand to her forehead as she looked at her forearm.

She was sobbing again as she watched the blood pour down her arm. She didn't know what made her do it but suddenly the threat of insanity that she had been living with... The fate of St. Valdimir's guardian became so real... Between Sebastian's darkness, his mother, and the spirits from before it had all become too much. She slowly climbed out of the bed... It was all just too much. Her eyes fell once more on the stake that she had thrown to the floor and the thought that popped up in her head scared her more than any Strigoi, "Sebastian!" She called before she nearly ran to the door. She stood the doorway, bleeding, "Something's wrong with me," She sobbed as she cradled her bleeding arm.

Seb watched her go to the room, feeling helpless, and as she shut the door behind her his eyes fell on the bottle of red wine and he groaned. Instead of caving he opened a pack of cigs, something else he'd almost stopped, and went to the window to smoke. He stood there for sometime when he heard Serena calling. He dropped the cig into a glass of water and turned to see her bleeding, hunger from not feeding struck him hard before he shoved it down and grabbed a shirt. He tore it in two and made a type of tourniquet, his heart racing as he used the other half to bind the wounds. "Sweet Vlad... Serena..."

He picked up his phone and called for the nurse and when she came she surprised him by handing her a spirit blessed ring. He slid it onto Serena's finger, then realized his hands were bloody. He grimaced and the nurse, who was now tending to Serena frowned. "You need to go eat, I'll keep an eye on the lady..." She held her hand over Serena's arm and the wounds slowly began to heal. It was rare to find another moroi with the spirit ability but it wasn't as surprising to find that she was working as a nurse... "I'll call for someone... I'm not leaving her."

He went to the sink and washed his hands before bringing Serena a glass of the wine he'd been eyeballing earlier, "Drink this, it'll dull down what the ring doesn't help..."

He'd always been so careful... so careful to make sure she didn't take too much darkness. He'd always been so sure he'd keep her from this... but her it was... happening anyway... because of him. He took a breath and swallowed the guilt, she didn't need those emotions right now so instead he tried to focus on support and love.

"You haven't even taken anything from me... I don't understand how..." He took a breath and the nurse shot him a look, he nodded and moved to the phone. Within moments there was a feeder and he took her to the bathroom. It wasn't long before he came back out and took a seat by Serena's side where the nurse had moved her to the couch.

~*~

Anna moved through the tunnels. The four Strigoi were waiting but it took little time to dispatch them and Jace informed them as they got closer to the larger group that was obviously planning to ambush them. After killing about six they came to a four way split in the caves and Anna frowned. "Stay between us Jace..." No sooner than she said it were they attacked by ten strigoi. The problem was the caves were nearly pitch black and the pen lights they wore didn't show nearly enough. Anna ducked an oncoming blow and swung her leg under her attacker, knocking him from his feet before she blocked another blow and lashed out with a kick to the strigoi's knee that broke it and put him down temporarily. She staked him then turned and staked another strigoi who was running up on her. She tried to keep herself between them and Jace as the other Guardians were doing but it was becoming increasingly more difficult.

It took two Dhampirs to take down a single strigoi at times and this was one of those times. Anna felt her hair grabbed and her head yanked to the side, she brought an elbow back into her attacker's ribs and stomped her toe. She was released and helped a struggling Guardian stake the Strigoi he was restraining. The Elites were called what they were for a reason, down went six of the ten strigoi and the four remaining were obviously the older and stronger of them. However, everyone was beginning to tire and Jace was shouting that there were more coming. How many Abigail had recruited was unknown but obviously it had been more than the twelve she'd allowed to be seen when the Commune was attacked... a smart move on her part, only showing part of her hand...

Serena shook as Sebastian wrapped up her arm and called up a nurse. She was crying still but for an entirely different reason... that thought. She looked up at Sebastian, how could she even think that. It wasn't until the nurse came that Serena even noticed the dark circles under Sebastian's... For once her own feelings had overpowered his and she hadn't even clocked his need to feed. Looked down the ring on her finger and felt it calming her slightly. She was still shaking and those thoughts.... they bounced around in her head. She curled her fingers into a fist, frustrated with herself.

She took the wine from Sebastian and sipped at it slowly despite wanting to down it. She assumed that would not be good in the slightest for the baby. As she drank, she watched him slip away into the bathroom with a feeder. She turned her attention to the woman who was leading her to the couch instead until he came back out and sat next to her.

She turned her head into him and closed her eyes, "I... don't know what's happening..." she said quietly. She had finished off her wine but she really could use another, however, she was not risking that. She took a deep breath, "Maybe.... it was the... ghosts... and your mother... and whatever darkness I've already taken," she was calming slightly. She still shook but it seemed to be more from fear than anything else. She looked up at him, "Is the baby okay?" She asked suddenly thinking that the trauma or loss of blood could have harmed it.

Seb looked over her aura and the nurse nodded, "The baby is alright... it's aura is a little darker than what would be normal but I don't think it's in any kind of distress."

Seb let out a breath and held Serena against him, he wasn't sure what to do or say... Honestly, he worried that maybe he'd said something wrong before. He knew one thing for certain though, he was going to confront his mother and it wasn't going to be pretty. He brushed Serena's hair from her face, his leg bouncing from his ragged nerves and he let out a sigh as the nurse finished patching Serena up.

"From now on, if you feel like your slipping you need to tell me," Sebastian said, his voice firm but not angry. He understood what it was like to not realize what you were doing till you'd already done it. "You can't lock yourself away and hope it will pass, it doesn't... it gets worse until you let it out... Why do you think Gunner and Anna used to knock me out? You have to talk to me Serena, you can't just keep it all locked up in there..."

~*~

Anna finally had a moment to catch her breath and she heard Thomas speak up, "Casualties?"

"None but Luke's leg is broken," she answered as she glanced back at the man.

Jace's jaw worked, he was fighting the urge to heal because he knew he had to save his strength for Gunner... If the worst came true. Anna rested a hand on her shoulder and Thomas nodded, "We don't know how many more are further in, Jace... can you see anything?"

Jace looked around, grateful for the distraction. "Five... they're spread out in the caves... I'm not really sure about the rest."

She understood what he meant, auras weren't really his thing and he was having to push himself to see them... it was probably getting difficult.

Thomas glanced at Luke who was being helped up by two others, "David, get Luke out of here... The rest of us will keep going."

As the group moved further in Anna frowned at the quiet... Why wasn't anyone attacking?

Serena curled up against Sebastian, taking her arm back when the woman finished with it. She quietly thanked her before she cradled it against his chest. The pain was gone but the memory of it all was fresh. Serena had been hurt before, it never phased her... But hurting herself, that was something completely different. She nodded her head when he told her that she needed to tell him when she felt like she was slipping as she had... She had never had this problem though, she didn't even know that she was. She was in a dark place before she could even get herself out of it. She looked up at him, "I'm sorry for scaring you..." She whispered now feeling the fear and worry that had been dampened by her own feeding into her.

She rested her head back against him, "I'll tell you next time... And... I won't be alone like that again.... I promise."

The thought of the stake on the ground sprung up, almost solidifying the fact in her head that she was never going to let herself be alone when she was that low. She moved her hand slowly down to her stomach and took a deep breath. The shock of it all seemed to pull her more or less out of the funk she was in but she couldn't shake it off. She brought her other hand to Sebastian's and clasped it, "Don't leave me," She whispered as her rested her forehead against his shoulder.

The nurse stood and looked at the two of them, "If this persists at all, it might be best to put her on some medication. Depression can be a symptom of pregnancy. It might weaken the bond between the two of you though as I know it weakens Spirit abilities. I've.. never actually heard of a shadow kissed on anti-depressants..." She took a moment to think, "Also, if you need the reassurance, we have ultrasounds and such in the hospital," She looked between them and smiled, "If you need anything, just call."

With that she left, leaving the two alone. Serena looked toward the bedroom before sighing, "I think I need some air... can we go for a walk?"
~
The sound of footsteps filled the air. There were two distinctly different sound footfalls, those of dress shoes and those of high heels. With little care or stealth, Gunner and Abigail walked up to the group of Guardians and stood a few feet away. Gunner's eyes scanned the group, the red ring around his pupils easy to see against his lightly blue irises. The man smiled, a set of newly acquired fangs visible. His mother stood just behind his shoulder and played with his short hair a little, "Well if it isn't the whole gang."

Gunner's eyes fell on Jace in the center as he took in the numbers and his face twisted a little before he let out a humorless laugh, "Glad I finally get the chance to kill you."

Abigail clapped her hands, "Isn't he just the sweetest? My baby boy only awakened an hour and he's going to tear through you all."

One of guardians moved in front of Jace and took a fighting stance. Gunner started to laugh again, "Do you think you stand a chance against me now?"

Thomas removed his stake from his belt and stared down Gunner, "You're out numbered."

"You're outmatched," Gunner snapped back. Thomas ran at him, hoping to catch him off guard. He didn't have a chance to react before Gunner grabbed his wrist and broke it, causing him to drop his stake. Grabbing the man the throat, he threw him head first into the jagged cave wall. Abigail looked at him as blood started to pour out of his head, "Gunner, he could have made for an excellent edition."

"Hardly. The man doesn't think... He'd be staked in a week," Gunner replied, never taking his hands off of Jace, "Now, the Moroi. Hand him over before I kill the lot of you."

Seb nodded quietly, "Of course..." He didn't like the idea of Serena going back to that room and he planned on not letting her out of his sight until he was certain she was feeling better.

As he stood he helped her up and kissed her lightly, "I'll be fine... I just... I wish my crazy didn't have to bleed off on you..."

He led her out of the room and smiled somewhat, "How about we go out to the garden? It's not much but it's quiet and it's warm out for once..."

~*~

Anna's heart raced when she saw Gunner but when her eyes found his it felt as though it had been torn out of her chest... She was slightly behind and beside Jace, the others in front but she could see him just fine. He, however, seemed completely focused on Jace. The Moroi knew enough to be afraid, he shifted closer to Anna and Anna drew her stake once more. Maybe if she killed Abigail Gunner would be easier to deal with... she could maybe distract him. It was a long shot and she knew it was probably useless. Strigoi awakened their ex-lovers every day and because Anna had been turned and brought back she couldn't be turned again... Plus, she wasn't even sure Gunner had still been in love with her to begin with so who was to say she'd be any distraction at all. He might just snap her neck and walk away but if he didn't she had to hope Abigail did because if she didn't and the Strigoi riding in Gunner's body decided she'd make a good chew toy, and Jace failed at reviving him, she could end up a blood bank till he finally got bored and killed her...

Her thoughts helped her to steel herself even as she heard his voice... So like Gunner aside from the malice behind them. She was about to tell Thomas not to attack but it was too late... Gunner broke him like an old toy he'd grown bored of. Anna moved forward, placed herself between Gunner and Jace... her palm sweating on her stake.

She gestured behind her back to the other Guardians and two of them ran at Abigail as she went for Gunner. The other three took up defensive positions around Jace. As Anna lunged at Gunner she dodged to the left at the last moment and kicked out at the back of his knee, attempting to take him down to the floor.

Serena stood when Sebastian helped her up and a small smile played at the corner of her lips when he kissed her. She shook her head, "It's okay... If it didn't, I wouldn't have this bond with you... And despite it... getting a little scary, I like having this bond. Being able to help you.. and I can know where you are and make sure you're safe."

She pulled away from him as he offered to go to the gardens and nodded, "The gardens sound perfect... Not much is perfect right now..." She walked over to her bag and pulled out a sweater as well as another silver ring and put both on before she returned to him. She took his hand in her's and rested her head against his shoulder. The two enchanted rings helped, she was just glad that she had some left in her bag. She leaned her head against his shoulder. She felt his own emotions stabilizing and she clung to those because it helped her stabilize a little.

Then they were out the door. The warm evening air was nice. It helped. She looked up at him, "I love you."
~
Gunner's stare down with Jace was interrupted when Anna stepped in the way. Although, the emotion behind his eyes changed, he merely had a new staring partner. He watched her as she ran at him, he kept still knowing he could wait until last second to react. So, it was hardly an issue when Anna dodged to the left because he hadn't even thrown himself forward. He turned fully, pulling his leg out of the way of her attack before he caught her jaw in his hand. He smirked, his eyes filled with lust as he looked at her, "I think you just bit off more than you could chew, Banana."

He licked his lips a little before his hand moved to her wrist. He was free to do as he wished and forget about the guardians for a moment due to the fact that his mother had already tossed aside her two guardians, leaving them alive to later be turned and was working on those around Jace. He slammed her wrist against the wall, hearing the crack followed by the pinging of the stake hitting the ground. Gunner knew taking out the wrist was the most effective way to deal with a guardian. One couldn't really brandish a stake with a shattered wrist. He pressed his lips to her temple, "Two years is too long," He almost hissed before grinning, "Unfortunately, I've been waiting four years to kill Mr. Szleskie."

He tossed Anna to the ground turned on the three guardians, who were all a little busy dealing with his mother. He smirked and easily slipped between them and grabbed Jace. He shoved the man against the wall and grabbed hold of the stake he held and easily ripped it from his hands and tossed it aside, ignoring the burning in his hand. He wrapped his hand around Jace's throat and stared at him, "Strigoi still just a joke?" Gunner hissed in comment to his Halloween costume all those years ago. He pressed a little harder against his throat, "Death is too good for you."

He stared at him, "I'm going to make sure that for the rest of your life every time you look at another living being you feel your skin burning. I'm going to drive you so far off the deep end, you'll beg for death... But I'm going to make sure you live until you are old and grey... Because that is what a monster like you deserves, Jace," Gunner hadn't really played with compulsion and he could see the man fighting against it but he knew that Strigoi's compulsion was strong than the Moroi's sooner or later he would break, "Your skin will burn. Your eyes will bleed. You'll never sleep. You can't feed. Drinking blood makes you sick.... The thought of blood makes you sick. Things haunt your every waking moment. You're every regret and fear will forever be in the forefront of your mind and you will live like this until the day the Earth eats you up... When nature decides to end you because you won't be able to end yourself."

Anna's breath caught as he caught her jaw, her eyes flashing defiance as she repeated her mantra in her head. Not Gunner, not Gunner, not Gunner... She was about to bring up her stake when he grabbed her wrist. She stifled a sharp cry as she felt the bones break as it struck the wall and the stake fell the the ground uselessly. His lips against her temple made her freeze as her mind ticked away options on how to escape. His words, hissed as they were, drove home that Gunner might be in there but he was an after thought... a passenger to what the Strigoi now was doing.

As Gunner turned away to face Jace, thinking her beaten, she shoved her pain down and picked up the stake with her good hand. Gunner's mother was distracted, so was Gunner, she had a chance to take out one of them and she had to choose now. Her hand gripped more tightly to the stake and she lunged... The stake sank into Gunner's back but his mother had caught sight of what she was doing and caught Anna by her hair and flung her away before she could complete the blow. Anna's back and head hit the wall and spots danced in her vision... The Guardians were all dead... all except... She lifted her hand to her bluetooth, "Luke, David... Get out now! Abort the mission go for he-"

Gunner's mother caught her by the throat and lifted her off the ground, baring fangs. Anna clutched at her arm with her good hand and swung a kick into the female Strigoi's face forcing her to drop her and stumble back. Anna's knees almost gave as her feet hit the ground and her vision swam again but she grabbed an abandoned stake from a wounded Guardian only to have her damn hair caught again by the Strigoi woman who promptly yanked her head back and locked an arm solidly around Anna's waist, Anna prepared for the bite... Steeling her body as she heard Jace start screaming... Obviously, Gunner's damage was done...

~*~

"I love you too Serena..." He kissed her gently and guided her into the Gardens. The place was pretty, it had a cobblestone path and flowers that bloomed late in the evening and at night. Mostly there were trees and a small pond where treefrogs sang. He guided her through the quiet, his hand interlocked with hers and tried to forget about the feeling of unease that was starting to rise in him.

He felt like something was wrong... off... but he kept putting it off to what had happened with Serena earlier. Still, the feeling of anxiety kept getting worse and he began to worry that maybe his own darkness was acting up even though he hadn't used his abilities in so long... He wasn't even aware he was frowning as they walked. It had been so nice out, the tree frogs were a nice distraction, but now his senses seemed to be narrowing down on that one emotion and he couldn't hide it from his face.

Eventually, he had no choice but to speak up. "I'm worried about Anna... maybe we should check on her?"

Gunner hissed when he felt the stake his back and dropped Jace to the ground as he moved to remove it, working through the pain. He smiled when Jace started to scream and dropped the stake on him, he'd live in agony for the rest of his life. Viewed as insane by all those who crossed his path. He dropped him to the ground allowing his screams to fully escape his throat. The screams bounced off the cave walls as he turned to return to Anna. However, he instead found his mother choking her. He saw her about to bite her... He growled, this was not allowed. No one was allowed to bite Anna, Moroi, Strigoi, NO ONE. He took a deep breath before he picked the silver stake up from the ground and threw it into his mother's back, through to her heart.

She gasped as she dropped Anna to the ground before collapsing. Gunner looked at his hand, it was red and his skin looked at though it were melting. He let out a huff from his nose before he grabbed Jace by the collar of his shirt and tossed him toward Anna. He held her gaze, "This is what happens to people who cross me and you are going to show the world," He hissed before he turned and left her there. He started to walk into the depths of the cave, where more Strigoi awaited him, "I suggest you leave, Banana. I'd hate to have to kill you too."
~
Serena stopped and squeezed his hand, "If you want to check on her, we can," She gave him a soft smile, "I am already.... starting to feel better. Maybe seeing Anna will help."

She took a deep breath, "But we don't even know where she is... She left without saying goodb-" Serena didn't get through to the end of her sentence before her eyes widened, "She went after him..."

She rose a hand to her lips, she hadn't even thought about why Anna had left because Sebastian's mother had stolen away her attention. However, Serena couldn't think of any other reason that Anna would leave Sebastian and herself 'vulnerable' to those who sided with his parents on the matters of their relationship. She bit her bottom lip, the only reason she would leave without a word would be to do something that she knew they would stop her from doing. Tears rose in her eyes at the thought of Anna going after Abigail's army. Who knew how many people that woman had turned and... what if Gunner had turned as well, "Oh Vlad...."

Anna fell to the ground, stunned. Of the things she'd expected to happen, that hadn't been one of them. As Gunner shoved Jace into her she caught the helpless man as he groaned and whimpered. The jar made her wince at the damage to her wrist and her eyes flashed back to him, questioningly. Her answer came and she gritted her teeth, Not Gunner...

As he walked away, Anna wasn't stupid enough to go after him. For now, this was a losing fight... Her wrist was broken and she was pretty sure she had a concussion. She swayed to her feet, dragging Jace with her. Gunner had let her go, on the one had relief washed through her but on the other it just served to confirm that he had no longer loved her after all. Friends... that's all they would ever be when she got him back but by Vlad... if she got him back it would be enough.

She had to drag Jace with her, he was fighting her every time she touched him and when they got outside the cave Anna found Luke and David alive. Apparently, they hadn't gotten her desperate message to leave. "The others are still wounded inside... but there are still strigoi in there..."

David's eyes fell on Jace, "What the hell happened to him?"

"Compulsion... we need to get out of here before the strigoi change their minds about regrouping..."

David nodded and after they struggled with Jace half way down the mountain they were forced to knock him unconscious. Anna helped Luke with her good arm and David carried Jace. Down the hill they went and into the vehicle... It wasn't too much later that they made it back to court. Anna again helped Luke until other Guardians came running to help them. Anna was beginning to feel sleepy, she knew it was the concussion which is also why she had vertigo and spots were dancing in her vision now that she was moving again. She had to have help back into the building... Luke, she, and Jace were hauled to the infirmary and Anna fell swiftly into unconsciousness...

~*~

Seb cursed softly under his breath, "I should have known... He took Serena's hand, come on... we'll find out where she went."

However, as they were headed back they caught sight of the commotion going on in front of the building. He saw Anna stumble out of the vehicle, blood clotting on her scalp, and saw Jace and another Guardian forced onto stretchers. Anna was whisked away before Seb and Serena even got close... half carried by the Guardians at her side.... There was no Gunner.

Seb felt ill, "Come on... she'll be taken to the infirmary. We'll figure out what happened there."

As they entered the room a nurse greeted them, "I'm sorry, the wounded aren't taking visitors right now."

Seb's jaw clenched, "Angelina Ross, how is she?"

The woman glanced at a curtain and frowned, "She took a hard blow to the head... She has a minor concussion and a broken wrist. She'll be alright. Right now, she's resting."

Seb shook his head, "Move."

He brushed past the woman, ignoring her objections and shoved the curtain aside. Anna's face was pale, her brow covered in a cold sweat, there was dried blood in her hair, and she didn't even move at their arrival. Seb frowned, his hand reaching out before he pulled it back with a curse and knocked a vase of flowers off the bedside table, it smashed against the far wall before he sank into a chair... his hands shaking.

"I can't be here... will you stay with her," he asked Serena. If he stayed he'd heal her and if he healed her it could hurt Serena. He felt useless.

Serena was starting to panic when Sebastian pulled her by her hand and dragged her out of the gardens, so much for their quiet night. She was starting to think that if anything else went wrong she'd need another ring... She let him pull her as she tried to keep her own emotions in check so that she didn't get to worked up. Then she saw Anna and nausea swept over her. She looked but she couldn't see Gunner anywhere.

She took a deep breath and tried not to think the worst but it was rather hard not to when their friend had been swept away by a horde of Strigoi... She let Sebastian take her into the infirmary and thought that maybe she should have them check on the baby while she was here, after they ensured that Anna was okay. She bit her lip when Sebastian told the nurse to move and dragged her into Anna's room. She gave the woman an apologetic look over her shoulder before she turned her attention forward. She took a deep breath as she looked at their bruised friend. She dropped Sebastian's hand and walked over to her, pushing some of her hair out of her face.

Serena looked at Sebastian when he spoke, she could feel how being here made him feel but she didn't agree. She shook her head, "No, you don't get to leave, Sebastian," She told him as she moved back to the foot of the bed where he stood, "Our friend is going to need us when she wakes up and I can't handle all that's she's gone through alone. You are going to wait with me because I need you to wait with me," There were tears in her eyes that were wide with fear and worry that she was trying to keep under control, "I can't be alone right now, Sebastian," She said in a stern voice, "I don't trust myself to be alone and I don't trust myself to reassure our friend."

She took a deep breath, finding anger welling up in herself, and turned away from him. She walked over and found a cloth that sat on the table beside Anna's bed. She grabbed it and squeezed it a little before holding it out, "Clean up the blood... Maybe you'll feel better if you are doing something..."

Sebastian gritted his teeth, trying to keep his cool. He understood where Serena was coming from, he really did, but if he stayed he was GOING to heal her. He couldn't help it. His jaw worked as he kept completely silent and worked on just breathing for a moment before he finally stood. He could tell her he couldn't be here all he wanted. He could tell her that if he healed her the darkness would bleed on them both but if he didn't he was GOING to have a serious breakdown in about five minutes. His hands shook as he rung out a cloth and dabbed at Anna's wound but it only made it worse... Seeing the damage this close made his palms tingle and his mind daze. He took a few steps back, shaking his head.

He walked out and when he came back he had the nurse with him, "She wakes up and you call us... immediately."

The nurse blinked, flustered, but seemed to soften when she saw Sebastian's hands shaking. "We'll call you as soon as she wakes."

Seb looked at Serena, his eyes apologetic, "I can't... and you can't be alone. So we both have to leave."

He didn't leave any room for argument, he didn't stay TO argue. He left the curtained area and then left the room. His hand already drawing out a cigarette and his mind racing... He felt ill. He knew he'd been harsh with Serena but as much as she usually understood, she'd never understand his overwhelming need to FIX things... it was what spirit made him do... It wasn't a choice when it was someone so close to him. It was instinct and he could fight it all he wanted. If he healed her, darkness... if he didn't... serious breakdown... and either way Serena would have been caught in the crossfire.

He felt like he'd just chosen between his best friend and his love and it made him feel like shit either way... He ran a hand down his face and struggled to calm down.

Serena's eyes widened when Sebastian just up and left the room. It was only made better when he returned a moment later with a nurse but the blow returned when he left once more, telling her they were both leaving, and walked out not waiting for her. She took a deep breath before she walked out after him. She noticed him smoking and kept her distance, not wanting to breathe any smoke in. Normally, she wouldn't mind too much but with being pregnant, she just... she couldn't risk it. She stuffed her hands into her pocket and looked at him. She knew this was hard for him but... as much as she couldn't be alone, as much as she didn't want to be alone when Anna woke, she couldn't let the girl wake up alone either.

She took a deep breath, "Go back to the room," She said quietly, "I'm going to ask if one of the nurses can do an ultrasound... make sure the baby is okay. I'll ask a nurse to stay with me but... She can't wake up alone, Sebastian. Not with Gunner still... missing," ultimately, they didn't know what had happened to Gunner. However, there was no circumstance that was good about him not being here, "I'm going to ask about the... medication too..."

She sighed and walked over to him, risking it just this once. She moved his hand away from his mouth and kissed him, not wanting to leave him like this on a sour note. She took a deep breath and took off one of the rings before sliding it on his pinkie finger, "Tell me if something goes wrong, alright?" She looked up at him, that was one great thing about their bond. Sebastian hadn't needed to call her in years, he just spoke right into her mind. It freaked her out the first time but it was helpful now. She brushed a strand of hair out of his face and smiled, "Be good," She warned him before she stepped away again and turned back to the infirmary and went to ask a nurse about all it was that she'd be needing.

Days went by, they turned into weeks, the weeks went by and turned into a month. In that time Anna had gone out over and over with the other Elites, hunting for Gunner but she always came back... She knew Sebastian and Serena would worry if she didn't. Still, the search was going out wider and wider and it was taking an increasing number of days for her to come back each time. Each time she came back she collapsed into bed from exhaustion and slept for a solid day. Seb argued with her about her wearing herself out so badly but it was like talking to a wall. Anna had become more and more determined. She was training harder than she ever had when she was at the courts which was also putting a strain on things... As much as she loved her friends she was barely spending any time with them at all. Seb couldn't really hold it against her, he remembered what losing Anya had felt like.

The Queen put a lock down on both the courts and the Academy, no Moroi in or out... no untrained Guardians either. The only ones allowed out or in were the Elites and the Guardians sent with them to supplement their forces. Gunner was a very wanted Strigoi, he was a talented fighter and his mother had created one of the largest armies of strigoi seen since the attack on Academy and the nest found shortly after all those years ago. It was a concern now that Gunner may be following in his mother's footsteps, creating yet another Strigoi nest but they could find no proof. The man was like a ghost, much as his mother had been.

In the meantime, Sebastian was also feeling torn. He wanted to be able to demand that Anna let him know the instant she found Gunner so he could help her bring him home but on the other hand he had a baby on the way and he had an obligation to them too. He kept these feelings from Serena, he said nothing about going after Gunner. He didn't need her feeling like she was making him choose. However, he rarely slept well lately... disturbing dreams he could never quite remember seemed to stick with him the moment he closed his eyes.

As for his family, they weren't making things any easier. They were pushing and pushing and pushing for him to have another Guardian and though Seb and Serena had both agreed they wanted another Guardian taking over they didn't want his parents influencing their choice. Finally, however, the Queen seemed to give way... She agreed that with the rising Strigoi threat, Sebastian needed a Guardian to protect him and his family. So, she'd sent a Dhampir Guardian named Airen Hugh to watch over them. Airen seemed easy going and trust worthy enough... She stayed out of the way and even seemed willing to help Serena with things now that certain activities were becoming difficult.

His family backed off on the Guardian thing but picked right back up on their vocal disapproval of 'illegitimate' 'mongrel' children. The first time his father had slipped and called his unborn child a 'mongrel' was also the last time. Sebastian lost his temper, lost his control, and used the training Serena had given him to slug his father hard enough that it had broken his nose. That was the last he'd heard of the name calling but they'd moved right along to picking at his choice to marry Serena. According to his mother it was all well and good for a Moroi Prince to have his fun with Dhampirs, even to occasionally produce possible future Guardians, it wasn't however... appropriate for them to marry their 'fun'. Also, his mother having scented blood in the water when she'd last spoken to Serena about the attack on her friends, had made it a point to bring up how miserable Anna looked and how it was a shame that her 'dhampir' friends weren't helping her...

Seb ran a hand through his hair, the ceremony was only three days away... the Queen had postponed it several times because of the happenings and Sebastian's own mental state. However, now people were beginning to raise questions... prying questions, and the Queen thought it best to silence them by getting things over with. Seb was feeling the stress. He'd never wanted the title, but now he'd be taking it anyway. He glanced at Serena, "Are you alright?"

The last month had been difficult. Between Gunner missing and Anna chasing after him, she rarely saw friendly faces beyond Sebastian. The one good thing was that it seemed as though Sebastian's new guardian wasn't in league with his parents. In fact, she had been pretty helpful but not in an overbearing type way. It was nice to have someone around who didn't assume you couldn't do anything. Although, with Sebastian and Anna both being so distracted, she kind of missed the two of them coddling her... A reminder of when her being pregnant was the biggest worry in any of their lives.

Being stuck at Court with Sebastian's parents wasn't favourable either... The two of them continued to berate her, their relationship, or their unborn child at every moment they could. Luckily, they hadn't had a repeat of the take situation thanks to the antidepressants that Serena was currently on. However, they didn't stop her from still having low moments. Maybe it was due to the fact that she couldn't get in contact with her own family. Her mother was so out of it when she left that Serena was still unsure if the woman even knew that she had. Not to mention, contacting her mother might remind her father about her and no matter how well Jace compulsed the man, she didn't want to risk him finding her again. All that added up to her not being able to share her happiness with her family. She had hoped at one point that his parents might come around... That they might come to be happy for the two of them and celebrate their marriage and child. That looked like it was never going to happen though. Most people got two families out of getting married, Serena and Sebastian weren't even going to get one.

She placed her hand on her stomach that was protruding quite a bit now and it was quite clear that she was pregnant. Looking down at it, she smiled. She supposed that Sebastian and her didn't need their families when they were starting their own. She was pulled out of her thoughts when Sebastian spoke and looked up at him. The medication had been dampening their bond as of late, which made her worry about all the feelings that she couldn't get a read on now... She had become so used to just knowing that she had forgotten what those emotions just looked like. Although, this was the first time in a long time that she knew that all the feelings in her head were her own. She stood, with a slight amount of trouble and walked over to him, wrapping her arms around him. Her belly pressed against him, keeping the rest of them a few inches apart. Serena tucked a piece of his hair behind his ear and smiled, "I'm fine... Just thinking... A lots changed in a such a short amount of time," She explained quietly.

She took hold of one of his hands and moved it to her stomach, "Some good, some bad... It's just a lot to think about."

Serena looked up at him and bit her lip slightly. Not being able to be in his head worried her, it made her feel unsure. However, she preferred being unsure rather than unstable. She squeezed his hand a little, "Nothing... has changed between us, right?"

Sebastian frowned and kissed her, "No, I still love you and I'm always going to... If I seem different it's all the stress." He smiled some at the way her belly separated them, "Though... I do feel as if something is coming between us." Just to show her what he meant he lowered his hands to her belly and kissed her again.

"I'm nervous... about the ceremony. I don't understand why they have to make a big deal out of it." He sighed, he'd never been one for a huge public displays. He ran a hand through her hair, "I'm also worried about Anna... She's been gone for days again."

They both knew what had happened to Gunner though neither of them had pressed her for further details on what had happened. All Seb knew for sure was that her aura wasn't happy and it wasn't sad either... It was determined... like that was all there was for her. He rested his chin atop Serena's head, "I'm afraid she isn't going to recover from this... I'm afraid she's going to spend the rest of her life chasing after Gunner and that's all there is ever going to be for her."

He shook his head, "But I can't tell her to just move on... He's like my brother. I don't want to give up on him either but I have you now, I can't just run everywhere after him. I want to be here for our baby and for you... everything is different and I worry sometimes that Anna holds it against me..."

It was true, Anna hadn't been around nearly as much. Their conversations had been short and though Anna always seemed friendly enough there was no life in her eyes and her voice was empty... even when she laughed. The only time he saw it come back was while she was training and then right before she left there was always fear in her aura... but she wouldn't talk to him about it...

~*~

Anna had her hands shoved deeply into her pockets of her jacket, the scarf pulled tightly around her neck, but the cold wind still stung her eyes and the exposed portion of her face between the hood of her coat and the scarf. Despite the fact that her cheeks and nose were chapped red she barley felt it... She was too busy trying to understand what the russian woman in front of her was saying. They'd seen Gunner in this small village, the hunters had spotted him and apparently he'd been alone at the time. At first Anna wasn't certain it had actually been him but the more the woman described the Strigoi her son had told her about the more it was beginning to sound like him...

Still, if he'd been here he was long gone now and so were his tracks. The blizzard that had held back the search for him would have wiped away all traces of his travel in the three days Anna and the others had been forced to hole up in another commune several miles away. She wasn't good at Russian, even after taking lessons and having Kazenia (another of the elites) trying to teach her she was still only able to understand certain words.

The woman kept pointing to the dense woods behind the village and saying something but Anna didn't know what... despite that she nodded as if she did and walked back to the others shivering and rubbing her arms. "Did you find anything out," she asked Kaz. The other woman had a grim look on her face, "More Dhampirs were taken from several different hunting parties... this isn't right. Strigoi almost always go after Moroi... the blood makes them stronger. Why would they be going for Dhampirs now?"

Anna knew why... because Dhampirs were the better fighters. They could be trained more easily than the weaker Moroi who lost their magic anyway after the change. Still, she kept that fear to herself. "Easier prey I suppose... We should meet with the others."

Serena's eyebrows furrowed when he mentioned something coming between them. She was about to ask what he meant when he placed his hands on her stomach that was literally coming between them. She laughed and smacked his arm lightly when she pulled away from the kiss, "Not funny, Sebastian!"

She moved her hands to his chest when he filled her in on what she had been missing with his worries due to her medication. She sighed a little as she started to run her fingers over his chest lightly, "Becoming the Prince of a family is a big deal... And think about it... when the ceremony is over, you and I can slip away. After all, this ceremony isn't so much for you as it is for everyone else," she took a deep breath, "And as for Anna... I doubt she is holding any of it against you. Just like you said you need to be here for our baby and me. She knows that if I weren't pregnant the two of us would be searching for him."

She rose on her toes and kissed him, "She understands, Sebastian," she brushed a strand of hair behind his ear and smiled up at him, "I just.... I wish we could be more help," she rested her hand on her own stomach and sighed, "But... I know that Anna wouldn't let us risk it. Which is the exact reason she hasn't asked you to go with them to find Gunner," She held his gaze as she continued, "And I'm sure she is fine. Anna is so incredibly strong but she's all the way in Russia now... It's going to take sometime for her to come back. Besides, I don't think Gunner wants to hurt her... I mean, he killed all those Guardians and drove Jace mad but... Anna got out with minimal injuries and you remember what she said about Gunner killing his mother. I know that injuring someone isn't the worst thing you can do to someone but... for the most part it seems like he won't hurt her."

She took one of his hand in her's, "Let's eat out tonight. I feel like we've been hiding ourselves away in this room and it isn't helping either of us. Besides," she reached a hand up to run her thumb under his left eyes, "It looks like you need to go to the feeders..." she squeezed his hand slightly, "You don't have to... starve yourself because I'm... not comfortable around them. I love a healthy you more than I... hate them."

Seb smiled and kissed her, "Anything you want, Love." He rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand and glanced around for their Guardian. Airen was seated quietly at the table and was busy playing solitaire but obviously she'd been paying attention because she stood up and grabbed her coat. "Where would you like to go," he asked as he rubbed her shoulders.

Despite the fact that Airen seemed well enough, Seb hadn't brought himself to completely trust her. He could see her aura and sometimes she was a little too interested in their conversations. He kept his worries to himself however, there was no need to worry Serena when he wasn't even positive about it himself. Also, despite Airen's helpfulness with Serena he sometimes caught amusement in her aura when his pregnant love was struggling or irritation when she had to help her even though her face was all smiles and she was completely friendly outwardly.

Airen, despite his question, was frowning... "As much as I understand how you guys need to get out... Moroi aren't allowed off the grounds, even guarded." She held up her hands, "If I took you off the grounds I'd never hear the end of it... I'd probably be replaced."

Seb frowned and looked down at Serena, "How about we go out to the Gardens and have a picnic then?"

He ran a hand through his hair, some frustration showing. Though the Courts were full of things to spoil Serena with (the Hotsprings, the massage areas, etc) he understood her need to get away.

Serena smiled a little when Sebastian started to massage her shoulders asking where she wanted to go. However, she hardly had a chance to answer before Airen was giving her two cents. She looked between the two of them and laughed a little as Sebastian tried to find an alternative. The two of them both seemed so worried about leaving Court that they forgot what the court had to offer. She smirked and looked at them, "I meant the restaurants that are here... at Court," she shook her head a little and leaned back against Sebastian, "Although, a picnic in the garden sounds far more romantic."

She smiled at her fiance and patted his chest, stepping away from his hands (despite how nice it felt), "Just give me a second to get dressed in something more suiting."

She slipped away into their bedroom, closing the door being her. When she came back out a short while later, she was dressed in jeans and a nice top, just a little more put together than prior. She had a blanket draped over her arm and held it up slightly, showing it off, "I got a blanket... maybe if we order some food now, because I don't think either of us want to cook right now, and go get you to the feeders, we'll be able to swing by and grab our food on the way to the garden."

She closed the distance between them, placing her hands on his chest before she kissed him, smiling, "Maybe we can take your mind off all this stress for a while."