I want to have a personal clone army loyal only to me.

Granted, but then your son whom you did not know of becomes a Jedi knight and is almost killed by your master, so you fight him and in the end it is your downfall.

I wish I was Spider-Man.

<Snipped quote by Ubermensch>

Granted, but then your son whom you did not know of becomes a Jedi knight and is almost killed by your master, so you fight him and in the end it is your downfall.

I wish I was Spider-Man.

Granted. Your life is a literal suckfest filled with so many rewrites. The fact that you can't keep one girl nailed down is attributed to how much the writers enjoy your torment. They kill your girlfriends and if they don't do that they undo your marriage via deal with a devil for some superfluous reason. Literally just... undo it. Like it never friggin' happened. Also... they kill Uncle Ben sooooo many times. What's up with all the friggin clones too? Not to mention that whole you-suck-so-bad-that-Doc-Oc-is-literally-a-better-Spider-man-than-you.

I wish for this whole Marvel mess to sort itself out to a more sensible state.

Granted, but Hollywood becomes bankrupt and Indie films become the only movie medium.

I wish to own a country for myself.

Granted, but it's a third world country and all the inhabitants hate you, revolt and put your head on a spike.

I wish my RP's wouldn't die off so fast. :(

Granted. All your RPs now die off slowly and painfully.

I wish I would find the love of my life.

Granted. No genitals.

I wish I was the Unicorn Wizard.