Fuck. All of the years she’d tried to forget; she’d been successful in forgetting certain things - numbing that horrible, hollow feeling that somehow clung to what felt like her very soul throughout the years. And yet, as Clara lie there, that ache and that numbness laced with her fear, pain, and absolute betrayal sprung forward in full force. She’d just barely heard Ryanair’s words, and the frown fell upon her lips just as quickly. It was easy to run - fuck it would be so easy to rip that needle out of her arm and run far away from it all - let Kieran die if it really was meant to be. Hell, she had wanted that from the start, hadn’t she?

But Clara knew better than that. She hadn’t exactly had an easy life, and she hadn’t done anything easy thus far…

She felt Ryanair’s touch, and her hand simply stayed within his as she heard him. Regardless of his words, she hadn’t relaxed - she couldn’t relax, the sounds of the ocean, the feel of sand digging into her back - his scent coupled with the salt on the air and that awful empty ache when it was all gone, laced with a god awful pain that consumed her entire body. It brought her immediately back and she wanted it to all go away. She didn’t want to feel it again… she’d done so well to try and forget…

It wasn’t fair- had this had happened a month or so before, Clara wouldn’t have thought twice. She would have simply let him die there and she would have walked away without a thought. Her pain would eventually dissipate, and she would move on. Now… Now things had been different. Not only had things changed, but she also couldn’t leave Ryanair… If she had a chance to fix this, at least for him, she would remain… She would push her way through it and by god if he didn’t live… She didn’t quite know what she would feel. But if he did make it -- shit, he better realize she’s saved him far too many times than he deserved.

God damnit… At least for now she would stay.

“Ryanair, sit up slowly and let Lye remove the needle. You'll be in charge of keeping watch over Kieran’s vitals.” Wolff stated after the blood mixed and merged, his brows furrowed in thought. He stacked both trays atop of another and set them down on a small table that had a small sink, he then turned and focused on his patient. The blonde did as told and slowly sat up, his stomach rolling in protest at the movement. He ignores it and soon the needle is out of his arm and Lye is gently helping him to his feet.

“Sure, but...why am I ‘in charge?’” He asked as the mage led him to a spinny chair, a small box of juice is then pressed into his hand. Lye moves back to where Clara still lays and offers a small smile before moving the bed closer to Kieran’s.

“Your negative, so you'll need to watch the transfusion. It's not a punishment though it's more of an option, he knows you won't refuse” The last part is whispered into his ear as the mage stands beside hin, the blonde blinks and nods as he sticks the straw into his drink. The sun had lowered and with it dinner would soon be underway, he watched as Wolff worked between both Clara and Kieran.

“I don't mind.” He offers into the room, he smiles softly when he sees Wolff’s shoulders drop and the tension leave his body somewhat. His chest didn't hurt as much and now the blonde feels a mixture of exhaustion and worry settle into his stomach.

It's all his doing, that damn Shadow Mage

The blonde focuses on finishing his drink and trying to keep his eyes open.

She still wondered if any of this was all worth it. Why the hell would she continue to put herself through all of this? Was it mere instinct? Was it the deep need to keep her sire alive, despite all of the hell that he’d continued to put her through? It seemed impossible to think that Clara would continue with any of this, and yet there she was, still lying there in hopes that either her blood, Ryanair’s, or even both of them would help save Kieran… She almost felt like a fool- especially now that all of this had caused her to remember every single fucking detail of when he had turned her. Things that she’d forgotten either with time or from lying to herself had all found their way back to her, and all she really wanted to do was throw in the towel.

That familiar empty ache sat deep within her, and Clara either wanted to drown herself in drink, or try to force it all away by slipping to sleep. Either way, her dreams and nightmares would be there to haunt her even further.

Wolff’s words had brought her from her thoughts, thankfully, but she was confused when Ryanair had been directed to stand. He was supposed to be in this with her, so to see them suddenly unplug him and have him sit, she’d come to the realization that only her blood had been compatible…

Well, wasn’t that fucking laughable?

The frown remained on her lips, especially when her bed had been pushed closer to Kieran’s. She’d turned her head so that she didn’t have to look at him, and her eyes shut once more. She was exhausted, that horrible empty feeling mixed with that everlasting anger had been laced with a worry that she still couldn’t shake -- despite all of it.

Even still - Clara remained still, allowing everyone to do as they wished so that Kieran could be saved. As long as sleep would take her - she’d already felt it tugging at her quick enough, then maybe all of this would go by quicker…

Ryanair finished his juice and gave the empty carton to Lye, he sighed softly and stretched his arms above his head. The Mage leaned against the desk with a soft huff, the vampire turned to face her. “I'm glad we found someone compatible, it isn't a lie that sometimes sires and their fledglings don't match up. I do wished this hadn't happened, if you'll excuse me now I have to go with Vox to check the boundaries.” Ryanair watched as the mage bowed and exited the room, his gaze focusing on Wolff as he continued to work.

Wolff sighed softly as he connected the two needles, his eyes shifting between Kieran and he monitor. This was all he could do for now, all any of them could do was wait. He turned and arched a silent brow, Ryanair rose to his feet and moved closer to the healer. Wolff lifted a hand and settled it in the shoulder of the young vampire, he squeezed gently before moving to exit the room. “Relax and watch the monitor, I'll be back to remove the needle in about a half an hour. If anything happens just shout.” And with that the older male left the room, Ryanair remains still for a moment before moving to stand in between the two beds.

Not much else I can do...except watch and wait He thought as he pulled the spiny chair closer, his legs giving as he sat down heavily on it. The smell of food began to fill for air a few moments later, the blonde closed his eyes and leaned back with a roll of his shoulders. The steady beep of the machine filling the air had him slowly relaxing, his ears listening to the soft inhales and exhales of Kieran and Clara. He hoped they'd get through this, though he hoped no arguments would come of this.

Clara hadn’t intended on slipping off - amidst all of the chaos and the blood being taken from her, all she really had wanted to do was sleep even though part of her had wanted to remain aware of just what was going on around her. Eventually, sleep had taken her under, and regardless of how she thought it might have been a welcome thing, her dreams were where she couldn’t escape her past even if she tried. And this time, with the sudden recollection of that night thrust into the forefront of her memories, it was only bound to be worse.

She’d pictured every detail; felt every emotion - remembered both the fear and exhilaration of running away from home, clinging to the hope that she could start anew on her own, as if the notion of a young girl off on her own in the world was more than possible. Looking back on it now, she knew full well she would have been killed - be it by human, monster, or animal, it would have been inevitable that she wouldn’t have lasted. And yet, amongst her frenzied running in an effort to get far away from her father and her family before they knew she was gone - he’d been there.

Throughout the years she’d been able to forget certain things. The sharp lines of each and every detail had been blurred and faded, but the pain of his absence had still remained. She was able to recall every sound, feel every touch, smell every smell - reliving each and every moment. The pain of it all, when he’d finally sealed the deal on her immortality hadn’t even been as terrible as it could have been - at least not to her now, after all of the pain and wounds she’d endured over the years, the self-inflicted damaged she’d caused herself in an effort to pull herself from the world she’d no longer wished to exist in -- it was when she had woken up in Christian’s home - the realization that the man in front of her wasn’t the one whos hushed words still hung on the air, who had turned her into a monster all at once against her own will -- that man was gone, and he was long gone - she would learn, as she went on an inevitable and eternal search.

That hollowness - the emptiness that filled her soul in his absence is what hurt the most. The bond that was supposed to be formed day in and day out had been severed at birth - and it was an ache that she could never rid herself of.

Clara had awoken with a start, taking in a sharp breath as her eyes had shot open. It took her a moment to focus on the room, to realize exactly where she was at before she’d given a small groan. She felt exhausted and her body felt heavy. She felt as if she couldn’t even lift her own head if she tried. The frown fell upon her lips as she willed away that feeling - the ache that her nightmares always brought her as she turned her head to see Kieran still unconscious in the bed next to her.

She’d only focused on Ryanair next after a long moment, and she breathed a slow sigh. “Ironic, isn’t it?” Her words were quiet, almost a whisper on the air throughout the beeps of the monitors that Kieran was hooked up to. “That the one thing he’d thrown away was the one thing he ended up needing.” Clara spoke, her words heavy with disdain as she turned her head to look at the ceiling. Why she continued to put herself through this was beyond her -- part of her had been ready to run out the door, let him die then and there. She really would get over it -- she would have to. It couldn’t have been much worse than the empty bond that they barely shared.

“He never meant to throw you away.” Ryanair stated softly, his eyes focused on the beeping monitor. His shifted in the chair until he was cross-legged, his elbows resting on his knees as he inhaled deeply. He was exhausted but knew that his dreams would involve forgotten pain and terror that he'd blocked from his mind, he shifted his attention to Clara and felt his shoulders deflate. Kieran has told him the story, and the blonde remembered it with clarity as he parted his lips.

“He told me what happened that night, and while I admit to feeling anger and confusion in a way I understand. He hadn't meant to bite you, he'd felt whole and at peace and had forgotten for a moment that he was a vampire. He simply lived for that moment. After he'd bitten you he'd felt regret as well as fear, he stayed with you and then fled because the hunters that had chased him had found him. He wanted to protect you, so he did the only thing his mind demanded he do. He ran and kept running even when the sun was high in the sky, he told me he went to see you. He kept his distance and never tapped into the bond for fear of angering you or failing you as a sire.” Ryanair fell silent after those words left his lips, his hands folding themselves into his lap.

Some points were cloudy and really he wasn't the one that needed to say all of this. His head tipped backwards and a sigh echoed his lips, the smell of food was thankfully dulled due to the closed door. He sat up a moment later when the monitor skipped a beat, his eyes focusing on Kieran as it happened once more. He rose from his seat and moved to the tubes that connected them, his ears listening to the irregular heartbeats. He bit his bottom lip and turned to head for the door, he came to a halt when the sound of claws scratching the wood met his ears. Swiftly reaching the door he pulls it open and relaxes at who meets his gaze, Ynez chuffes at his softly and Ryanair moves aside to let her inside. The blonde moves to his seat after a moment Ynez jumps up on the bed and curls her body around Kieran, sitting down he arches a brow at the Alpha. She flicks her tail at him and sighs softly, Ryanair doesn't ask though he does relax when the monitor begins to beat normally once more.

Clara had nearly scoffed at his first words, looking away and to the ceiling for a long moment. To say he never meant to toss her aside was almost laughable. How could you not mean to do something like that? How could any of it had been accidental or unintentional? She had wondered day in and day out for years upon years what the hell was wrong with her. What could have been so terribly awful or what could she have done wrong to warrant such a punishment? What had been so suddenly unappealing that she was so easily used and cast aside like a literal piece of trash? She truly believed that she was meant to die that night, and for a number of years she had wished it had happened. Christian had prevented that as soon as he found her, and he prevented it even further in the passing years when she hadn't quite found a purpose. She'd lost absolutely everything that night and was only met with someone who wished to keep her alive – and for what? So she could live with an ever-dwelling anger and emptiness that she couldn't quite satiate?

When Ryanair had decided to speak again, however, she had glanced his way, unsure if she wanted to fully believe the words coming from his lips. Honestly, she knew Kieran had spoken to Ryanair of her before, Ryanair had made that clear when they'd first met each other, but she never expected him to explain what had happened. Who would ever want to talk about or admit to a mistake like her? The frown remained on her lips as he had continued, however, a swirl of confusion and mixed emotions surging through her at his explanation. Part of her, the logical part, could understand at least in the tiniest bit, why he fled. The irrational, emotional part of her felt nothing but frustration and anger over it. Even if he had to run, why couldn't he come back? Why, after all of that time, did he keep his distance? Because he was afraid of failing her or angering her?

His distance had only amplified her anger and had only made her feel as if he failed her a hundred times over.

Had he come back for her, perhaps things would have been different… She hadn't known when he possibly could have watched over her – what she would have given, at least in the beginning, to have a reason for it all. That emptiness and the lack of answers had her feeling not only anger, but feeling more worthless than she could have ever felt. Everything had been a mistake – she should have simply listened to her father, allowed him to marry her off, and go on with her life. At least she would have eventually died with possibly a smidgen of happiness in her life – at least she would have been content enough to live.

Clara looked away from him while he spoke, swallowing the small lump in her throat. Kieran should have told her all of this – not Ryanair… Kieran should have explained everything – he'd had a hell of a lot of opportunities, and yet, he remained silent even when she was there in front of him – practically begging without words for him to make it right.

The sudden unsteady tone of the heart monitor had her looking over once more, watching as Ryanair had immediately reacted to the difference. He hadn't needed to venture far before Ynez had immediately come in and settled herself around Kieran – and the monitor soon regulated once more.

She let out a small breath that she wasn't aware she was holding before she looked back to the ceiling again. She was exhausted, but she didn't want to sleep. She didn't want to feel it again. Not after Ryanair had spoken…

"…Why didn't he ever tell me?" Not that she expected Ryanair to know… But then again, he'd always been closer to Kieran, hadn't he?

“I already butchered everything by telling you what I have. He's the one that has to tell you the rest.” He stated firmly as he sat once more in his chair, his head lowering until his chin met his chest. He hadn't meant to say all of that, he'd planned on keeping his damn mouth shut. And yet he couldn't, maybe he was too kind or something. He swallowed and blinked his eyes open when a soft chuff met his ears, his head rose slightly and he came face to face with Ynez’s narrowed glare. He shrugged his shoulders and then huffed when Ynez refused to lower her gaze.

“This a poor way of getting him to move Alpha, really now I'd expect at least a snap of teeth.” The drawl had Ryanair glancing at the door, Lye stood with her hip against the doorframe. The blonde noticed her change in clothes, the white shirt and brown pants she'd had on were swapped for her current attire. He arched a silent brow and watched as the mage moved into the room, Ynez deeming it fair to snap her jaws. He felt like he was missing something, his lips parted to speak but Lye beat him to it. “You and me are going to head to the next town over and gather some things that we need. Food and clothes and whatever else, get up and change into something.” He blinked and watched as she checked the tube and the monitor, his gaze slipping to Ynez when she doesn't say anything else.

The Alpha offered a roll of her head and a wolfish grin in answer. She settled down with her head on Kieran’s stomach, Ryanair rose slowly to his feet and paused when a gust of frigid air pushed him forward. “The hell-I'm going-stop that!” He bit out as the now-misty breeze continued to push him forward, he had to spread his arms out to keep his balance. Sighing in irritation the blonde moved his legs and relaxed when Lye released her hold, he rolled his eyes and headed towards his room. Slipping inside he goes to his dresser and begins to pull out his clothes, shedding his current ones he slips into an attire he hasn't worn for a few years. He glances in the mirror before reaching down and grabbing a pair of boots, once down he exits the room and heads downstairs. Keeping Lye waiting meant a punch punch to the face, slipping his hands inside his pockets he waits.

Lye hums softly and checks the tube and monitor once more, her attention slipping when Ynez snaps her jaws once more. “I'm going, geez. Now watch him and make sure to warn Wolff when the bag is empty, another five minutes. We'll be back and Vox will stay behind, do you wish to come Clara? You're done and really a distraction is a good idea, he'll be out of it while the transfusion happens.” It was a silent gesture, one that she was putting out there in hopes of an agreement. She moved towards the female and removes the needle, pressing a gauze pad over the spot before applying a bandage. The Mage waits for a response before turning to Ynez, the Alpha blinks her sky-blue eyes sleepily. She offers a small smile and a gentle pat to her white head, she then stretches her arms above her head and waits for a yes or a no.

Clara was confused – perhaps more confused than she'd ever been over the situation. She hadn’t expected Ryanair to explain anything at all, most of which to include what he'd known about that night. The girl was complaining just to vent and get it off of her shoulders, and yet he met her with a reason which she'd never heard, or anticipated, before. She hadn't quite known what to think, and initially had parted her lips to argue with Ryanair, but she thought better of it. Her lips closed tight and she narrowed her eyes at the ceiling for a long moment. Perhaps it was better that way; although she wasn't quite sure she would ever get an absolute explanation out of Kieran… especially if this onslaught of attacks continued. There was only so much the body could handle…

She let out a slow sigh to keep herself from another outburst as she studied the ceiling as if it had been the most interesting thing in the room. Meanwhile, her thoughts were racing and she was mulling over what he'd told her and wondering if she should believe him or not. He'd given her no reason to doubt him, had they not just been carelessly throwing snowballs at each other before this whole ordeal had come to light? What would he have to gain in fabricating some story about her and Kieran?

The frown remained on her lips throughout her inner turmoil, and she had shifted a bit in place as she glanced to Ryanair over the new commotion. She wasn't quite sure if it was a good thing or not – wanting to pry more information out of him if he, in fact, knew anything further, but then knowing full well that it wasn't the best idea to do so. He'd given her enough to wonder over, and she would have to eventually seek her answers elsewhere.

Clara still couldn't shake her emotions over the whole situation, feeling terribly tired but knowing full well that any sleep she sought wouldn't help her in the least. She would eventually wake up from that same dream over and over again, and no matter what she did, she couldn't hide from it. All of the years that she'd managed to blur the lines, forget the details, and inevitably make herself feel at least the tiniest bit better over it had all suddenly been for naught. It was as if he'd done it to her all over again, and she couldn't help the anger that still bubbled within her – regardless of the fact that he'd slighted her centuries upon centuries before.

She had watched the interaction between Lye and Ryanair only partially, seeing what was occurring without truly registering it, but soon Ryanair had left and Lye was soon removing the needle from her arm. Clara had sat up carefully, ignoring the sudden rush that had come over her head at the new movement. Maybe she could wander off and lock herself away in her room – surely the wine would get to her much quicker now that she'd given as much blood as she had.

But Lye's invitation hung on the air and despite the frown that still lingered, Clara bit her lip and thought it over. It probably would do her some good to get out and get away – it probably was a better idea than shoving herself into her own little corner until sleep took her over again…

She glanced to Kieran for a moment before she breathed a quiet sigh. Lye was right – she needed a distraction. "Alright… I'll come along." She spoke quietly and moved to slide her legs over the side of the bed before she carefully came to stand. She'd been a bit light headed, but she knew it would soon pass. She still had kept her distance between everyone in the house and herself, finding it easier that way, but what would one quick trip into town hurt?

"Just – let me get changed first and I'll meet you in the foyer." She offered before glancing once more to Kieran as she slipped out of the room.

It wouldn't take her long at all to get dressed, sliding into a pair of jeans and some black boots before she slipped a long-sleeved black cotton shirt over her head. Clara had tossed her hair up into a clip, brushing away the stray tendrils that fell from it out of her face before she eyed herself in the mirror for a moment longer. She looked tired and almost spent, and she frowned as she finally turned from the mirror and headed out of her room and down into the foyer.

Lye joined Ryanair a moment later, a small bag over her shoulder a bright-eyed Evian at her side. “She insisted, even though they lack vocal cords they still get what they want across.” She muttered and the blonde titled his head, Evian merely opened her jaw and lolled her tongue out.

“What did she do?” He asked as the wolf moved forward, his hand settling into the warm fur on her head. The mage wrinkles her nose and lifts the bag at her side, he notes with amusement that it has drool and a tear.

“She wouldn't let go and then began to drool on it. Mature of you Evian, really.” The Beta yipped and wagged her tail, Ryanair snorts softly and moves to open the door. His shoulders rolled as the cool air met him, his eyes scanning the darkness for a moment. He could feel the hum of magic in the air and knew that Lye’s crystals were still in effect, he glance down when a large head nudged him forward.

“We're almost ready, does Ynez know you're coming along?” The blonde knew the Alpha could hear them, he was convinced when the Beta nudged him once more and chuffed. Apparently she had the all clear, shrugging and allowing the female to pass he moved to follow and wait.

Why Clara had decided to go along with them all was beyond her. Lye had asked her, and she felt almost guilty should she say no. It was probably good for her though – good to get out of that godforsaken place at least for a little while, especially while her mind was racing the way it was. Everything Ryanair had told her was spinning through her mind and playing over and over again, and all it did was pose more questions that she needed answers to – answers that she wasn't certain she was going to get, not if Kieran couldn't push through everything that had been happening as of late.

She still had left a bit light headed from the transfusion, but she made her way out of her room regardless. A small sigh fell from her lips as she made her way down the hall and down the stairs carefully, catching sight of the group that was to head into town. She wasn't quite in the mood that she had been in earlier that day – that morning had been much more carefree and part of her had wished she could simply rewind and go back to that, instead of mulling over everything that had just happened.

He hadn't meant to change her…

Those were the words that stood out the most. That it had been a spur of the moment, emotional decision to change her – that he left not to simply run from her, but he left to keep her safe. Everything she had assumed, that had driven her anger over the centuries that passed, hadn't quite been right.

Clara dug her hands into her pockets as she reached the base of the stairs and she glanced to Ryanair for only a moment. "Ready when you are…" She murmured quietly, not exactly looking forward to interacting with the rest of them, but feeling relieved that she would be away from the house for an amount of time.

Ryanair offered Clara a small smile as she approached them, his eyes then turning to Lye for directions. “We're headed to a village not too far from here, it's about fifteen minutes by foot. Isabela gave me a list of what we need and I have a few things I need to get as well so I guess we should head out.” Lye offered as she reached a hand up and pointed to the West. The blonde shrugged and allowed Evian to move before them, his hands moving to his pockets.

“Are clothes on the list?” He asked after a moment of thought, he watched as the mage reached for her bag and pulled out a piece of parchment. Lye’s head tilted as she read the neat writing, her steps seeming to glide over the snow as she walked.

“Yeah, and a whole bunch of other crap. For that we'll have to separate since this town has about three different clothing stores.” The blonde hummed in acknowledgement but didn't say anything more, his lips thinning as he went over what he'd said earlier. How could he have been more stupid? It hadn't been his right to speak as he had and yet he'd just blabbered without hesitation. His jaw clenched and his eyes closed momentarily as anger swelled in his chest, anger not directed at anyone beside himself. A sigh left his lips as they continued, his feet sinking slightly into the snow with each step.

What was done, was done. When Kieran comes to he'll explain and hopefully things can settle at least for a bit. Then again they still weren't sure about this Shadow-mage business and with the male possibly losing control again it wouldn't be that simple. His shoulders sagged as he watched Evian move ahead of them, her tail swaying as she walks. This was a distraction and he'd take it without protest, he'd been trying to find a way to leave the mansion if only for a few moments anyway.

Clara had caught his smile, but to be honest, she hadn’t felt much like smiling back. She bit the inside of her cheek after a moment longer as she approached the group, her hands still stuck deep into her back pockets. This was a distraction - she had to keep telling herself. No matter how much she wanted to simply stow away to the kitchen, have a drink, and lock herself up in her room with her own thoughts, this was probably much better for her. She could get some fresh air and she could find anything else to keep her mind off of every little thing that had happened in that house as of late.

They had all stepped outside and were soon trudging through the snow towards town. A fifteen minute walk wasn’t terrible and the cold didn’t bother her in the least. She simply eyed the snow beneath her with each step, listening to the crunch her boot had caused as she pressed forward, drowning out most of the chatter between the rest of the group. Christian had probably wondered where she went off to, but she hardly cared. He was used to her flippant ways anymore and it was a wonder that even he had kept her there with all of the danger that continued to loom around them. Whether or not he thought it was a good idea that she was near her sire was to be seen -- but he hadn’t pressed for her to leave just yet.

Clara breathed a quiet sigh as she trailed along towards the back of the group, wondering if she could break away a bit from them once they had gotten into town. Their list was long enough, and the idea that they could split was rather appealing -- although, she would have to tuck away the urge to simply break away for a long while. It probably wasn’t the best idea, not with the risk of whatever that shadow mage had up their sleeve… But lord, she just wanted to be on her own and far away with her own thoughts. Ryanair had certainly stirred up far too many things within her that couldn’t very well be settled until Kieran was in his right mind to talk about it. And whether or not she had the courage to ask him about everything still was much a mystery to her. Part of her hadn’t wanted to know the truth.

All she wanted to know was what she needed to gather for them and then they could be on their way… As long as everything went smoothly enough.

“Right then, I'll head off with Evian and gather the food. Ryanair you're in charge of clothes and Clara can handle the books, fair?” Lye chirped as they neared a village gate, the blonde shrugged and accepted the list given to him. Evian barked once and he watched as Lye handed a list to Clara, with a nod they dispersed and the blonde found himself alone. He released a breath and made his way down the pathway, his eyes scanning for a clothing store while his ears listened to his boots crunch on the snow.

Finding one he nears the door and opens it, taking a moment to kick the snow off so he wouldn't bring it with him. “Hello and welcome. How can I help you?” A soft voice filled the quiet shop, the blonde turns his attention to a counter and the female that stands behind it. Her hair is brown and reaches mid-back, her hazel eyes watch him as he nears the counter.

“We need these clothes if you have them. It's a rather large order, apologies for that.” He stated before offering her the list, his hand moving into the pocket of his pants. He watches the girl tilt her head and scan the list, her lips moving soundlessly as if to help memorize something. After a few quiet minutes she straightens and moves around to head further into the shop, the blonde remains where he is and prepares for a bit of a wait. The list had been rather long.

He huffed a breath and shifted his weight to his right leg.

~~~~~

“How can I help you?” A male voice brought Lye from her thoughts, her gaze lifting up to meet curious brown eyes. The male before her was well-built and tall, his skin tanned though she wondered if it was natural or not.

“No, I think I know where everything is. Thank you though “ She offered with a smile, she moved past the male and moved further it the large market. In her left hand she held the list and in her right she held a basket with which she'd place the items she had in mind of buying. A nudge had her glancing down and finding narrowed eyes focused on a pile of wood. Lye checked the list and found wood absent, she hummed softly before clicking her tongue. Evian moved forward and grabbed a stack, Lye focusing on grabbing the food and filling her basket. It was best they not linger here too long, she didn't much like the thought of Kieran being ill or so many people being away from the mansion.

Clara had still lingered behind the group in the slightest until Lye had given her the list of books that she was to pick up. It seemed that everyone was quick to scatter, perhaps eager to get back to that hell-hole of a mansion that they’d been in for a while now. None of them really had too many moments of calm as of late, so Clara did want to take advantage of her isolation once everyone had left her. Her shoulders felt heavy with the new knowledge that Ryanair provided her, unsure of whether or not to believe him. Then again, he’d given her no reason to think he could have lied to her, what motivation could he have possibly had?

She’d become so bitter over the irony of all of it -- that she, of course, had matched and needed to provide her blood to save him. Part of her had despised the panic that she had felt once he’d fallen under, feeling the tug of those memories before she was thrust right back into them. All of those years of trying to dull them and make her believe otherwise had all fallen to the wayside -- she remembered full well every little bit of that night and she wanted to forget once more. Yet, Ryanair’s words coupled with that past unsettled her more than she thought it would. She could have never imagined that he stayed with her until he couldn’t -- that he even had come back to check on her. Clara had needed that -- if only she could have known that so many centuries ago, things perhaps would have turned out far differently. She wouldn’t feel as bitter as she had… She wouldn’t have turned out so terribly hardened from it all.

A slow sigh fell from her lips as she headed towards the bookshop, a younger male already greeting her before she really had a chance to look around. “Morning, miss -- can I help you with anything today?” Clara shook her head all at once and lifted her list from Lye. “Just going to look around -- I think I can find everything.” She didn’t want to be bothered anyway, and perhaps she could find a thing or two for herself there. It had been a terribly long time since she’d allowed herself to indulge in any sort of story..

It took her a little while to find everything that had been on the list, grabbing a couple of books for herself that seemed interesting enough. The stack was handed over and then paid for, packaged up nice and neat so it was easier for her to carry. She’d collected everything before she set back out into the snow, sort of wandering through the town before she found a bench and sat down with a small yawn. The urge to simply run off and away from all of this had been terribly strong -- Christian wouldn’t even know where to find her this time. But, she knew full well it wasn’t necessarily a good idea. Whatever it was that was hunting Kieran had to have been familiar with each and every one of them who stayed under that roof. It probably still wouldn’t have been safe for her to break off on her own -- no matter how tempting it really did sound…

Arms full with his spoils, Ryanair wandered around and watched everyone around him. His page was slow and really he wasn't in a rush, the chilly air felt oddly refreshing on his skin. He paused before a small shop that sold hand-made objects that varied in size. His head tilted for a moment before he began to walk once more, he slowed however when he came across a familiar pair.

“You didn't have to growl at the man, he had offered to grab our bags.” Lye huffed irritably as she adjusted the bags in her arms, Evian huffed and shook her head. Ryanair snorted softly and walked behind them as they continued down the street. “Oh, bite me. And besides I would have kicked his ass if he had tried, food is important.” The Mage sneered with her nose held up in the air, Evian snorted and rolled her head.

“Herr let me help. Will we be heading back soon?” He asks as he reaches for the bags Evian has on her tail the werewolf allows him to take them after a soft bark in greeting. Lye rolls her shoulders and guns softly in thought, they'd spent enough time out and she was starting to feel exhausted.

“Yeah. Let's head back to the entrance and see if Clara is there, Vox is on lookout but it's best if I'm there as backup, plus being out is making me anxious.” She admits and Ryanair can see the signs, small movement of her fingers and the like. He hummed in agreement and moved to stand in between both, his gaze scanning the people milling about. He wondered briefly as they too a right if they'd be able to come out like this again soon.

Clara hadn’t quite known how much time had passed while she sat there, eyeing her shoes as she idly kicked them and buried them in the snow beneath her. She was left alone with her thoughts, an occasional person passing her by in town had only served as a temporary distraction. How her life had suddenly ended up like this, she wasn’t entirely sure. Weeks ago she had been brooding, drinking, and fighting with Christian day in and day out. Now, here she was sitting upon a bench in a town, having to run errands for a group of people that she’d suddenly become entangled with. And to make matters worse, she had been caught in a whirlwind with her sire who she previously had been intent on killing the moment she had found him -- and she’d done nothing even close to the sort. On the contrary, she had saved him more than once and even now he was back at home hopefully healing considering the blood that she of all people had to provide for him.

And now Ryanair’s lingering words had her feeling more conflicted than she’d been before.

Part of her had wanted to head back, grab Christian and ask him to leave with her… He had kept himself distant the moment they had all ended up together, and at least for a moment she had been thankful for that. Now, she wasn’t so certain. Where had all of their bickering gone? She would have paid to have gone back to normal even then - at least then she wouldn’t know what she knew now, and wouldn’t worry over the entire truth should she ever get to pry it from Kieran.

A small huff fell from her lips before Clara had finally pushed herself from the bench. It had been long enough, and she wasn’t sure when the others would be around. So, she headed towards the entrance, the pile of books in her arms as she trudged through the snow. Should they have left the mansion so soon? Something within her told her it hadn’t been the smartest of ideas, but a bit of fresh air had been good for her. The frown was still painted upon her lips as she walked along, eventually hearing the bit of banter between Lye and Evian. She was silent as she approached the group, slipping beside Ryanair without looking to him. “Are we headed back now?” Maybe she could grab a drink and perhaps bury herself in one of her own books she had picked up -- that seemed like a better idea and a viable distraction to everything else going on around her.

“Yes, everyone is done and Lye is feeling anxious. So it's best we leave now.” Ryanair offers, his gaze never turning down to face the other vampire at his side. He had messed things up by telling her what he had, Kieran was going to be furious when he awoke. Lye half-turned to scowl at him before beginning to walk forward, Evian following after a sniff of the night air.

“Are you staying up?” Lye asked after a few moments of silence, the only sound being that of shoes -and paws- crunching under the snow. Ryanair blinked his eyes and tilted his head, he didn't think he could not with what had happened.

“Doubt it.” He answers with a shrug of his shoulders, in truth he wasn't sure what he had planned to help him pass the night. Evian chuffed at his side and nudged her nose against his hip, the blonde glanced down and found bright eyes watching him closely. He forgot sometimes that werewolves had the ability to smell emotions, he rolled his shoulders and offered an elaborated answer. “I might be in the Music room or something so if you hear music that's most likely me.” His voice sounds flat and he ignores the cool nose that nudges his hip once more. He's more than likely going to berate himself for his idiocy as well as play, he didn't much fancy seeing the way he died behind his closed eyelids either. A huff left his lips as they continued through the snow, his shoulders sagging with the breath. He wondered if he could explore for a bit before heading back, glancing down at Evian he knew he wouldn't get far.

His tone had not gone ignored by Clara, but she kept her gaze ahead just as he had. Clearly he had reservations about telling her what he had, and Clara still hadn’t entirely understood why he even decided to tell her. Maybe he had grown tired of her brooding, thinking about Kieran in such a negative light and furthermore constantly speaking her disdain could have been something that had triggered him considering he had known the truth. She had only understood the pieces she was given -- the broken promises, the rush of one night where everything had been tossed aside for each other before the inevitable pain had settled in, waking only to what she’d become and the ache that lingered thereafter in the realization that although she had Christian to take care of her in his wake, she had been betrayed and abandoned by Kieran. How was she to even guess of his motives; to even think that he could have checked on her after all of this time? She couldn’t fathom the thought, nor did she want to entirely believe Ryanair either -- but the way he’d suddenly tucked himself away and seemed irritated, she knew she probably should believe him.

Her grip on the books in her arms had been firm as she kept her focus on the path ahead of them, eager to get back and submerge herself in drink to numb the feelings surging through her. Would she sleep that night? Probably not -- any ounce of being able to forget certain details; certain feelings had been cast aside hours before. Every bit of detail of her memories had flooded back and there was no amount of forgetting -- not so soon, at least.

A shame, really -- They’d at least shared a carefree moment before everything had fallen to shit again… now it felt like those walls were right back up between them with no crack in the foundation that might have brought it down.

He would submerge himself in his distractions as would she. Clara just wanted to drink, perhaps soak herself in a long bath, and try to bury herself in a book until sleep would take her over and the nightmares would inevitably pull her from that comfort.

The moment they breached the treeline that separated the village from the mansion, Evian lunged forward towards a figure that stood in front of the main doors. Wolff was standing with his face towards the sky, his hands in the pockets of jeans. “Welcome back.” He grunts as Evian nudged her head against his abdomen, his hand lifting to pat her head.

“Thanks, help us?” Lye asked when she was in earshot, the healer nodded and offered his hands for the bags. Ryanair kept a hold of his while Lye turned and waved her hand, the books in Clara’s hands levitating in the air. She found the ones she hadn't asked for and gave them back, she offered the vampire a nod before moving into the mansion. “I'll see you later “ She chirps as she bounds for the stairs and most likely her room, Evian snorts and follows Wolff into the kitchen.

“If I didn't know she'd be up all night reading I'd worry about how hyper she sounded. You're all free to do as you wish, Evian thank you for going with them.” The Beta barked softly before exiting the room and heading upstairs, Ryanair followed and left the bags he held before their respective doors. Everyone now had clothes and with a sigh, he tossed his own in his room before heading down the hallway towards the hidden staircase. Going down the stairs and to the Music room, the blonde sat before the grand piano that stood in the middle and merely peered down at it. He caresses the keys for a few moments before setting them down firmly and beginning to play.