GREETINGS CITIZEN/HERETIC/XENOS/SQUIG

This is Clock, your friendly neighborhood professional asian and professional part-time asshat idiot. This is an idea I got while doing warp dust on a whim based on various 40k fanworks such as If the Emperor Had a Text-to-Speech Device, Burger Marines, ToyHammer, and Dawn of Hospitality. AKA: parodies of 40k that quite clearly follows canon as much as Slaanesh goes to rehab (not much for those of you who don't know).

Basically, the idea would be something like this: Shit's on fire yo.

Okay, its on more fire than usual for 40k but than again, this is something of an alternate universe.

• Failbaddon the Despoiler of Plot Lines and Maker of Memes Abbaddon the Despoiler is gearing up for another one of his jackass'd crusades (and preparing a reason as to why/how it failed and wasn't his fault).

• Chaos is being Chaos and trying both tear itself apart and the rest of the galaxy with the Gods being absolute shitheads.

• The Tau is trying to spread more space-weeabo-communism by chucking space popes, battlesuits mechas and communist manifestos everywhere (sometimes literally).

• Dark Eldar decide that they need things to be sadistic on and raid more because its in fashion or something; apparently now humans are in vogue at the moment as they always are. (look, I got nothin', okay?).

• Orks are Orkin' 'n WAAGGHHH!!-in' rioght zoggin' 'ard, ya grotz.

• Tyranids just keep eating shit at increasingly alarming rate and in desperate need of a plantary version of Weight Watchers.

• Necrons finally had their wakeup alarms tipped off after some fucker decided to append "millions of years" instead of "hours" to the end of the alarms and clearly woke up on the wrong side of the bed as a whole.

• The Eldar are still there with their sexy elven waifus being all tsundere and unhelpful as fuck as per usual.

• And the Imperium of Man is running around flailing as it tries to get shit sorted and keep everything okay; rumors persist that the Emperor has awoken or something stupid like that. Space Marines are still committing mass genocide against the enemies of man and being overpowered fuckers. People still don't expect the Inq- *BLAM*

And then in come our characters, illogical people from literally everywhere, brought together by improbably means, not killing each other through idiotic reasons going on an immense adventure through this shit show of a galaxy that they probably don't want to go on, lead by an impossibly stupid jackass.

Lets see if this goes anywhere or if my interest holds long enough with this. Anyone interested?

You know what? I'm in need of some more light-hearted campaigns. Count me in!

Fuck. Yes.

Count me in.

Seems fun, although I'm not really that familiar with the WH40K universe, only that I've read the Wikis and played Dawn of War. But still, SPESS MEHREENS.

@DepressedSoviet@FlightofIcarus@Hostile Welcome aboard, I'd say like one more person and this should be enough for a relatively small scale RP between the four of us ^^

Seems fun, although I'm not really that familiar with the WH40K universe, only that I've read the Wikis and played Dawn of War. But still, SPESS MEHREENS.

Given the nature of this RP, you can literally just make the most space marine-y space marine full of HONOR and COURAGE (and large hams) to SERVE DA EMPRAH. Yes you can just be a walking stereotype if you can play it right

As for the rest of you two, any ideas what you might play?

@ClocktowerEchosI was thinking a VERY stereotypical Death Korps guardsman. IE suicidal fervor for the Emperor, damn near no emotion, and a serial code instead of a name.

@DepressedSoviet As long as he can speak normally and such I think it would be okay.

Personally I'd take things about the DKoK to hilariously extremes like literally everything going over his head as he takes things very literally, attempting to suicidally atoning for his failures of the tiniest transgressions (ie knocking over an empty cup or accidentally hitting someone while walking past them), speaking in a monotone that always manages to sound sarcastic, etc. Basically make them rediculous since that's the overall theme of the RP.

@All, I'll see to making a quite CS guide soon so stay tuned!

@ClocktowerEchosExactly what I was thinking. I'm looking forward to this.

@DepressedSoviet@Hostile@FlightofIcarus
Here be a CS thing. For reference, the GM character will be an Ork sniper ^^
He'll be up soon-ish famous last words

@ClocktowerEchos

Perhaps I could play as Creed for his tactical genius?

@Hostile I'd say play as someone who emulates him to varying levels of success for comedy where he's more of a legit magician capable of making either a baneblade appear out of a lamppost or a live hand grenade or several fluffy bunnies. Sort of like how in DoW2 Commissar LORD Bern is basically trying to emulate Yarrick.

@ClocktowerEchos

I'm sorry, but I don't really understand that. Could you clarify?

@Hostile Basically don't actually be Creed, play as someone emulating Creed but hasn't quite mastered the fine art of TACTICAL GENIUS yet. Clearer?

@ClocktowerEchos

Sure. I'll play as some other IG General.