Clears throat and speaks in true Russian accent

Okay, so let me tell you guys what REALLY happened to Las. Since you folks are rather good comrades, I feel like sharing with you all the details of the special operation mission that led to the event of Las' concussion. I trust you won't be using this information to blackmail us or reveal it to the outside world, capiche?

Fiddles with garrote wire

Anyway. It all started when news of an underground Russian organization called "The Black Vipers" reached the KGB ears. Word in Moscow was that this organization had kept low on the radar for many centuries, gathering ressources and materials without arousing the suspicion of the world's leaders. And finally, with the turmoil currently happening as the countries are preparing for a third world war because of the fascist American president Donald Trump and the stupidly overconfident leader Kim Jong Un, the Black Vipers got a bit too hungry and accidentally leaked informations on a Doomsday device that would be a total game changer.

So naturally, the KGB deemed necessary to send me on a mission to stop the Black Vipers from finishing their device and use it for global domination. However, skilled as I may be, the underground organization had time to build a decent base of operationss and get the personnel to wage war on a country. So my bosses called in for reinforcement. The top of what they could call in to help me in my mission. The KGB gave the MI6 a call and asked for their best agent, someone that I surprisingly knew from my undercover task at scouring role-playing forums.

So, first part of my mission was to get in the Black Vipers' line of sight and have them recruit my skilled self into their ranks. Needless to say, you all know just how good my infiltration skills are, so it was a piece of cake to become one of their members. I was to be the contact that would allow Las to infiltrate the Black Vipers' hideout and help her terminate the heads of the organization and destroy the Doomsday device.

Little did I know that I underestimated my partner's badassery. Where my skills lie in infiltration and assassination, she is my polar opposite. She doesn't give a fuck about all that, and let me tell you why. That girl is like the mix of The Punisher and Superman. She doesn't take the backdoor; she punches people through the door. So yeah, hard to admit it, but she wasn't my support, I was HER support. Rugby is just an undercover activity she took to cover up the super strength she had and the badassery aura she exudes.

So yeah, my role in this operation was basically to guide her throughout the hideout while Las simply mowed down the organization by herself, making her way through the vast complex of tunnels and corridors and slapping giant of men and muscled thugs as if she was a pimp slapping her bitches to the ground.

Eventually, we made it to the core of the base. Unfortunately, the commotion Las caused pressed the heads of the Black Vipers to threaten us to blow the whole continent should we not back off. Unfazed, Las simply walked up to them and beat the living crap outta them as if they were mere dolls. However, one of them got scared shitless and proceeded with the Doomsday countdown. After kicking the guy into space (yes, Las can actually kick people so hard they leave their earthly bonds to be disintegrated into space as their pass through the atmosphere like a space rocket), she looked at me with a confident grin and simply walked up to the device.

I thought we were goners, but Las' confidence leaked into me and I put all my trust into her as I reached for the device myself. I set up the groundwork for Las to terminate the device, hacking into the system so that the machine would cool down sufficently to not explode upon heavy bludgeoning impact. However, there was nothing we could use to break down the device.

It was with a final nod and a grin as wide as the Joker's, Las simply took the device with her two hands and... headbutted the machine with all her might. The impact sound of her skull meeting metal was tremendous, and I could saw the Doomsday device breaking down into pieces as Las fell backwards, seemingly knocked out from the intensity of the impact she gave the device with her forehead.

Little did I know that the device was giagantic enough to be wired throughout the whole underground complex. So when Las broke it down with her headbutt, the whole place was just about to come down on our heads. So I did the best I could in this situation. I grabbed on Las, swung an arm around my shoulder and quickly left the area. It was easy to escape, as the gal wasn't really knocked out cold, simply confused from a concusssion. She was aware enough of the situation to run with me to the exit.

...

So now you know the details that led to Las' concussion. Needless to say, the shock was tremendous enough to affect her short-term memory, so she probably doesn't know about the mission at all. She'll probably believe she got her ass whooped while playing Rugby. I suppose it's better she doesn't remember. It won't compromise my identity, and sometimes some missions are best left unremembered.

However, I will always remember this mission and my partner, the badass girl that is Lasrever. God bless her soul, and I hope she will recover well from her concussion.

Zoe no longer needs to make contact to start the effect, and can instead start it on anyone within 2 metres of her body.