I'm hungry.
Yer always hungry.
You never feed me ever.
I fed you my milk toast a' the Nightingale Inn!
I don't remember that. Can I have a hambone?
I denne have any hambones, I didne eat any meat for breakfast. And I canne afford it.
I love hambones.
I know ye do but I don' have'em.
Wait! Who's that guy?! Look at that guy! That is a weird strange guy!
No he's not, keep walkin'.
He looked at you. He was going to bite you. But I would bite him first because I am a good guy.
Ye're a coward and a liar.
I am a good guy, I would never let anyone bite you ev- DOG!
Ye're- WHOA!
DOG! DOG! HI DOG! HI! FRIEND? HI! HI! FRIEND? FRIEND? HOW ARE YOU? HI! FRIEND?
CALM YER BLOODY ARSE DOWN YE MANGY BEASTIE!Patty was pulled like a rag doll by her Saint Bernard, chiding the salty dog as it lost it fell all over itself by the sight of another hound as they passed the gate, hopping around like a madman with his tail waving as if caught in a whirlwind. Less chiding and more surreptitious growling as it were, which gave the wee lass a few stares that she shrugged off as she dragged her stupid mutt toward the bazaar. Supplies were on the list today, just a double-check of what she could nab before setting out. The time to act was now, she could tell. She'd only been there a day, but little Patty had enough experience under her belt to tell that when a cavalcade of freaks started showing up they were about to do great things. Strange people from strange lands, armed to the teeth with odd weapons and foreign armors, looking stronger than she was to boot. The Gnome looked out place herself, though her coat was closed there was no hiding her backpack or the swords she had on her, looking more like a child playing "mercenary" than the treasure hunter she was. She wouldn't be outdone either way. They could be stronger, more powerful, and as well-equipped as they wanted to be. Patty would just have to be that much smarter, quicker, and less conspicuous.
The road had been a harsh mistress on her journey, now entering its third week. From the grassy wilds of the Green Glades to the Vil'Khul Forest the entire trip had been both dull and stressful. The open seas were a lot more entertaining when anything could happen, and the open and free salt-filled air was welcome on her skin. On land it was just hot and humid and she had to run from wolves sometimes or stab assholes in the kneecaps. Landborne for
three weeks and she'd already had no less than four attempts to rob her, and not good ones either. Chumps from the backwoods didn't know how to set up a good ambush. But it'd all be worth it after she had snuck her way inside The Keep of the Dead and rooted out what valuable artifacts that lay within. Doch Mol, the seemingly impenetrable stronghold of the once-living. Not if she'd had anything to say about it, she just hadn't been there yet. Patty first caught wind of it from a merchant at port telling wild tales on his way out of Norbank on a schooner. The Gnome wasn't one to listen to such falsehoods yet something about it grabbed her, coaxed her, and soon she was hearing it everywhere. From her burglary in Lansque for the mayor's opal ring to her voyage down the coastline of Gilden, the story remained to tempt her until she decided that no Lord or Lady on the Western Seaboard had enough guarded a manor to satisfy her urge to challenge herself anymore.
Which had brought her to Wesville. And time was running short. She'd awoken early that morning from a fitful sleep at the Nightingale Inn to begin gathering her pack and strategizing 'fore the sun broke over the horizon. She had her tools of trade plus the telescope she'd borrowed from her last time aboard a ship, a bear trap she'd found in the woods that she cleaned the rust off of, and some holy water she'd gotten a priest to bless a few towns back in Salerun in exchange for getting rid of some pests in the belfry. It struck her to buy a crossbow but that might be too bulky. Besides, she wouldn't need it if she never got caught. All that was left were some odds and ends, but her purse was growing lighter by the day. Healing potions were a priority yet she might have to take some the dishonest way. It may as well be a good day to practice, it was the last place she'd be able to do so before she was deep within the lifeless lands.
I liked that dog. That was a nice dog. We are friends.
Aww I love ya ya hopeless moron, Patty growled from her throat, giving Fisher a rough scratch on the scalp.
Pets! Pets pets pets I love pets pets are my favorite thing! *sniff sniff sniff... sniffsniffsniffsniff* MEAT! MeatmeatmeatIlovemeatmeatismyfavoritething!The sailor once again lost what little control she had over her idiot pooch as the Saint Bernard bounded up to a quite popular booth crowded shoulder to shoulder to get a look. As the mangy dog began to smell and lick tentatively at the heels of the people in the rear Patty would approach, standing on her tiptoes to get a better look at the wares. Something this popular was either incredibly valuable or absolutely useless junk that happened to be gaining traction as the great new fad. She had to angle her way around the table a bit but soon the woman hawking whatever it was began giving a sales pitch over what she was selling: birds. The one-eyed fair one from on the other side of the booth was selling little mechanical bird trinkets and it was at that moment that Patty decided that the answer was "both". A neat little doodad to most, but a precious tool it could be. And Patty had to have one.
Her emerald eyes grew transfixed on the flapping machinations chirping about the stand as the cogs in her brain turned. A machine like that could make a nice distraction or a test for traps, she might even be able to barter it if the fad picked up enough. But not only that, she was devising a plan to take one. Right in plain sight. As everyone watched. A vacant grin crept at her lips as the scouting began.
Patty took a strategic position on the far side of the table as the demonstration went on, one with a clear line of sight as she practiced what she'd do and say. Mind made up, ready to act, a little flying automaton flew its way from the table where her tiny hand reached out to meet it. The expression on her face was one of feigned wonder as she held the shiny fake sparrow, peering back up with childlike glee.
"I think this one likes me!" she gushed to the sensible chuckles of the crowd. Patty extended her hand once more for the toy to flutter back to the table, turning about to leave with a soft wave and convincing pleased smile to the crowdgoers. Some clapped at the demonstration before returning to clamor at the magnificent toys as they were before as Patty grinned to herself and stuffed the
real machination into an inner pocket near her chest with her back to them.
The "flying bird" had been flapping against her
Mage Hand as she guided it to her palm, and when it "left to return to its place among the other birds"... it never really left. Nor would it be there in a few moments. She doubted anyone had noticed her
Minor Illusion with the dainty wave of her free hand. She was just an innocent little girl caught up in the magic of the next generation of toys, after all. People'd be gullible enough to believe that. The one-eyed lass had enough birds anyway, it wasn't as if she was going to miss a single one of'em disappearing. With a hand tugging at her collar to hide the movements of the freshly-stolen automaton until she could safely place it into a more discreet pocket, the wee lass brought two fingers to her lips to give a loud signalling whistle.
"Fiiiiiiiisheeeeeer! Get a move on ya daffy cur!" The Saint Bernard ceased his inspection of the interesting smells of boots and the the booth with the meat lady to flop after the tiny woman, disappearing further into Wesville's market to gather last minute odds and ends.
@CoyoteLovely @LPRKN