Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
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Once upon a time, there was a Faraway Land. It was a land of magic, a place of mythical creatures and dangerous monsters, the home of mighty heroes and deadly villains. It wasn't always that way, though. Many eons ago, it was a desolate place, whose simple inhabitants struggled endlessly for survival. Then, great vessels appeared in the sky and deposited humans upon the earth. These humans scattered abroad and remade the world to their liking, and in so doing, made it a better place. For the first time in millennia, the natives flourished, not merely scraping by, but truly living and enjoying life. Humans, too, lived in harmony with the planet, and in blissful isolation from their home culture, they advanced further than ever before.

But the peace didn't last long. One day, a hole appeared in the sky, and through it poured millions upon millions of black monstrosities from the underworld. They swept through the planet, killing and terrorizing everything in their path. The humans hastily constructed five mighty fortresses, called Havens, throughout the continent to repel the invaders, and a great battle ensued. But they were sorely outmatched. With billions of invaders piling along the edges of the continent, each one more than a match for any human soldier, the fortresses fell in a matter of hours. Humanity came to the brink of extinction on the world.

Then, from the dust of the ground, twelve tremendous beasts rose to existence. Bearing immense power over the elements, they fought the invaders and drove them back to the hole whence they came. The humans called them Guardians. The beasts sealed the portal and retreated to the furthest corners of the earth, where they would remain in case the invaders ever returned. Before they left, however, one Guardian gave to humanity power over magic. Using this newfound power, the survivors sought to rebuild their war-torn world. The environment had taken a turn for the worse, and the creatures that once lived in peace had turned violent. To facilitate survival in this new world, the survivors turned to genetic engineering. They designed the tough, hardy Orcs to live in the desolate north, the agile, perceptive Elves to live in the treacherous forests, and the short, durable Dwarves to live in the western caves. More importantly, if the invaders ever returned, they would have to reckon with the new and improved humanoid subspecies specifically tailored to defeat them.

Centuries passed. The memory of the war faded into legend, and thence into myth. The subspecies forgot their common heritage and began to see each other as aliens. War broke out, and it wasn't long before the entire continent was embroiled once again in a bloody struggle for superiority.



You will begin this story as a resident of this world. Whether you arrived here from the modern world through a portal or grew up here from your youth, you're here now. A dragon, one of the Guardians, has kidnapped the Princess of Dragan and holds her at the center of Stonehune Volcano, in Westhaven Tower. The King of Dragan has summoned All Able Adventurers to come to his palace to prepare for her rescue. On the way there, you'll receive a letter that changes everything...
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Juicy
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Whipped something up, very much a work-in-prog. Was looking for more info on the world, particularly on how the different subspecies live. Are they segregated by region? Would it be uncommon for a member of a subspecies to live in a region they weren't originally engineered for? Would it be outright forbidden? And some more general world-building info that would help me build my sign-up: What, alongside the Kingdom of Dragan, are the main governing bodies of the Faraway Land? Are there other defining aspects of the three subspecies that can't be inferred from other fantasy series? Are there only the orcs, elves, and dwarves as existing humanoid subspecies?

Since I'm looking to build a mage character, too, do you have any preexisting expectations or, like, concepts for how magic might exist in the Faraway Land, or is it entirely free-form? I'm thinking Édain might draw spells from nature, maybe dabble with the four elements as they're commonly known (might also subvert a little in that category, like bring back wood, lol), with some "dark magic" influence. Maybe even summoning?

On my end regarding world-building, through my char's background, I want to establish being an "adventurer" as this sort of rogue occupation that appeals to idealists, as well as there being a collection of nomadic "witches" outcast from society based on the types of sorcery they practice; alongside being stigmatized within most societies, the magic itself could have a mental toll, leading to obsessiveness that later incites near-total isolation and monomaniacal study.

And if there are some discrepancies with my WIP so far, definitely hmu, especially regarding any unintentional tonal or setting dissonance. (For the later, I'm assuming this is high fantasy with medieval-era technology. If you intended for there to be other cultural influences in terms of names, dress, language, social standards, etc., let me know!)
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Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
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@Juicy
Those are excellent questions!

Magic is the art of turning soul energy, or "mana," into physical energy. Mana binds the spirit to the body. A spirit is the "spark" that gives you life; it's what makes the difference between a corpse and a person. A corpse has all the ingredients for life, but without that "spark," or spirit, it will remain a corpse. Mana is needed to keep your spirit attached to your body, but most people have enough that expelling some of it won't kill them. Sleep is often sufficient to replenish it.

However, mere humans don't have much mana to spare, relatively speaking. Demons, and Voidspawn to a lesser extent, possess considerably more, enough to destroy whole worlds with nary a thought. So some humans will make contracts with demons to gain access to their great mana reserves and become "witches" and "warlocks" in exchange for letting the demon absorb an equivalent or greater quantity of mana from other people. However, if the seller uses more mana than the demon absorbs and becomes incapable of restoring the balance, the seller's soul becomes forfeit. Most sane individuals would rather not face the moral dilemmas and risks associated with such an arrangement and avoid it like the plague.
__________

The most populous species are humans, elves, orcs, and dwarves. Humans are characterized by their long lives (max 120 years), superior strength, dexterity, and durability. Elves trade strength for improved senses, and they can usually see, hear, smell, taste, and feel with more acuity than most other races. However, they are quite spindly, and their strongest male bodybuilders are little stronger than a typical human female soldier. Thus, the elves rely heavily on magic for their strength, and have developed superior mana reserves as a result. They tend to live in the eastern forests where they can draw upon the ambient mana to boost their powers. Their unnaturally long lives come not from any genetic ability, but from anti-aging spells. Without them, their average lifespan is about 50+ years.

Orcs are the polar opposite of elves. Ordinary orcs are at least as strong as some of the best human bodybuilders in the world, but their senses are about half as good. Big objects, loud noises, pungent smells, and such don't bother them. Magic requires a certain finesse that the dull senses of the orcs usually doesn't allow, so very few, if any, are capable of using it. Most live in the barren Fellmoran desert up north.

Dwarves are a little odd here. They're basically humans, but considerably shorter. Unlike in most fantasy lores, dwarves and halflings are both the same species; it's just that beardlessness is a heritable trait that some dwarven communities gather around. Most dwarves live in or around the dormant volcano out west.

All four major species are ruled by a monarch. Alexander Dragan rules the humans, Erudessa Durvain rules the elves, Innocent Patronus III rules the dwarves, and Throk of Westpier rules the orcs. There are other races in the world, like centaurs, fauns, satyrs, gnomes, gremlins, goblins, and such like, but they are not nearly as populous as the major four.

Technology is a little strange out here. Magic freely intermingles with it, and it's not uncommon to find a swordsman watching a video on his magic tablet while wizards rocket around in experimental steam-driven carriages. Dwarves tend to focus more on the tech side of things while elves focus more on the magic side of things. Orcs have neither the time nor the resources to focus on either, since they're too busy struggling to survive the harsh climates and incessant raiding parties.

So I guess technology is more Renaissance Era than Medieval.
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Samdragonx
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Decided. This isn't finished, but a short beginning.

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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
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The Hero's Mark

Every so often, an individual will appear with a + cross symbol on their right hand. It's partially heritable, but sometimes distributed irrespective of heritage. The individual upon whom it appears gains immense talent and incredible strength in their area of expertise. They can develop their skills at a supernatural pace, gaining mastery beyond their elders in a matter of months, weeks, or even days. Thus far, the Mark has only been granted to those with strong moral compasses. While its origin is a mystery, a certain white-haired elf is always seen at or around its appearance.

The Mark also sometimes appears upon multiple individuals at the same time. Thus far, there live three people who are known to have it.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
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@ineffable
@Juicy
@Samdragonx
C'mon guys, let's get those apps in! Need any more lore expounded upon first?
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@Thinslayer
Aha! Thank you for your answers!

The existence of demonic contracts is a perfect vein for that "stigmatized (dark) magic" I was aiming to allude to through Édain. I might allude to King Patronus the Third in her sign-up as well, in regards to her father.

Poor orcs seem to have it pretty bad out there! I'd imagine they'd be easy to stereotype as a bunch of dumb brutes by members of the other subspecies.

But technology has a sort of steampunk-ish vibe to it, too. I will definitely keep Renaissance in mind. That era's appealed to me for a while, so that's pretty cool! I might make some tweaks to Édain as a whole to reflect that interest.

Thanks again; I'll keep working on my character.
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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Samdragonx
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@Thinslayer

Minor update to cs..
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by ineffable
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@Thinslayer
Any class you want me to play?
Could you also describe what the desired class means?
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
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@Thinslayer
Any class you want me to play?
Could you also describe what the desired class means?


The available classes are the usual fantasy ones. Fighter, Mage, Ranger, Rogue, Cleric, Paladin. Player characters don't have to immediately start out in a class; it can be later assigned to them at an early point in the story.

The elves have a mildly different conception of these classes. Paladins are always female, Fighters are always knights, Rangers and Rogues are patrol infantry, and Mages and Clerics are ruling class. They still perform their usual class roles.

Please choose whatever clasd you feel best suits the story.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by ineffable
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@Thinslayer
If I don't want to be an elf that's okay right?
What races are availible?
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
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@Thinslayer
If I don't want to be an elf that's okay right?
What races are availible?


@Juicy
Those are excellent questions!

Magic is the art of turning soul energy, or "mana," into physical energy. Mana binds the spirit to the body. A spirit is the "spark" that gives you life; it's what makes the difference between a corpse and a person. A corpse has all the ingredients for life, but without that "spark," or spirit, it will remain a corpse. Mana is needed to keep your spirit attached to your body, but most people have enough that expelling some of it won't kill them. Sleep is often sufficient to replenish it.

However, mere humans don't have much mana to spare, relatively speaking. Demons, and Voidspawn to a lesser extent, possess considerably more, enough to destroy whole worlds with nary a thought. So some humans will make contracts with demons to gain access to their great mana reserves and become "witches" and "warlocks" in exchange for letting the demon absorb an equivalent or greater quantity of mana from other people. However, if the seller uses more mana than the demon absorbs and becomes incapable of restoring the balance, the seller's soul becomes forfeit. Most sane individuals would rather not face the moral dilemmas and risks associated with such an arrangement and avoid it like the plague.
__________

The most populous species are humans, elves, orcs, and dwarves. Humans are characterized by their long lives (max 120 years), superior strength, dexterity, and durability. Elves trade strength for improved senses, and they can usually see, hear, smell, taste, and feel with more acuity than most other races. However, they are quite spindly, and their strongest male bodybuilders are little stronger than a typical human female soldier. Thus, the elves rely heavily on magic for their strength, and have developed superior mana reserves as a result. They tend to live in the eastern forests where they can draw upon the ambient mana to boost their powers. Their unnaturally long lives come not from any genetic ability, but from anti-aging spells. Without them, their average lifespan is about 50+ years.

Orcs are the polar opposite of elves. Ordinary orcs are at least as strong as some of the best human bodybuilders in the world, but their senses are about half as good. Big objects, loud noises, pungent smells, and such don't bother them. Magic requires a certain finesse that the dull senses of the orcs usually doesn't allow, so very few, if any, are capable of using it. Most live in the barren Fellmoran desert up north.

Dwarves are a little odd here. They're basically humans, but considerably shorter. Unlike in most fantasy lores, dwarves and halflings are both the same species; it's just that beardlessness is a heritable trait that some dwarven communities gather around. Most dwarves live in or around the dormant volcano out west.

All four major species are ruled by a monarch. Alexander Dragan rules the humans, Erudessa Durvain rules the elves, Innocent Patronus III rules the dwarves, and Throk of Westpier rules the orcs. There are other races in the world, like centaurs, fauns, satyrs, gnomes, gremlins, goblins, and such like, but they are not nearly as populous as the major four.

Technology is a little strange out here. Magic freely intermingles with it, and it's not uncommon to find a swordsman watching a video on his magic tablet while wizards rocket around in experimental steam-driven carriages. Dwarves tend to focus more on the tech side of things while elves focus more on the magic side of things. Orcs have neither the time nor the resources to focus on either, since they're too busy struggling to survive the harsh climates and incessant raiding parties.

So I guess technology is more Renaissance Era than Medieval.

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Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by StormHeart
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Name: Kiera Akello
Image:
Gender: Female
Race: Elf
How you got here:
Kiera was born in Aetherion and grew up in the far away land.
Background:
Kiera was always told by everyone she had amazing healing powers. Her mother and father were good clerics, so this made sense to everyone. She always enjoyed healing things, because she always felt at peace when she did it. Well, she would heal people if they complimented her. She was incredibly vain and would refuse to heal you unless if you said she was beautiful. Either that or whip up a sob story out of nowhere. If she felt bad for you enough, she will end up doing whatever you wanted her to do. Even though she was a good healer, she created a bad name for herself in her hometown because she wouldn't heal anybody who had done something bad to her one time or another, but even though she is unreliable she knows a lot about herbs and can heal broken limbs. When Kiera wanted to get out of the village and explore the world, she took this opportunity and went to King of Dragan and decided to help heal people while experiencing the world for the first time.
Powers, Abilities, & Equips:
Power: Advanced Healing
Abilities: Can use daggers
Equips: Healing staff, poison, burn, etc. antidotes, an iron dagger, and a cape to keep herself warm.
Desired Class: Cleric
Character Flaws:
Gullible, know to be absent minded at times, naive. Known to be spiteful at times. She is very vain and selfish.
Famous Quotes: "I don't understand why people don't like being clerics. You basically decide whether you companions live or die!"
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Samdragonx
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My CS is done. Can I get an A-proof-all? ^^
@Thinslayer
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My CS is done. Can I get an A-proof-all? ^^
@Thinslayer


Ravadon's background seems more like a whole life-story than a background. It starts with his birth, which is fine, but ends with his death, instead of ending at the point where our RP begins. It tells me a lot about Ravadon except for where he is now in his life.

At what point in the story does our RP begin?
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
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@StormHeart
I like the pic selection.

The "How you got here" section needs work. She can't have come from another world if she was born here. Please don't feel compelled to give her any weird origins if you don't want them. She can have nothing to do with other worlds whatsoever if you so choose. That section is there in case you felt like giving your character a more interesting introduction to the world (like being summoned, walking through a closet, falling from the sky, arriving by starship, etc.). If she was born here and was never even remotely involved with other points of origin, that's perfectly fine. But as-is, the section looks really weird.

In general, I'd like to see more work put into the character's background and personality, especially the character flaws. The simple, traditional nature of this RP was designed to give greater freedom to make strong characters. Please take advantage of it.

One place I would start is with the character flaw. This is the single most important part of the CS, because it's what you're developing about the character over the course of the whole story. If you're prepared to make a huge deal over Kiera's gullibility, naiveté, and spitefulness, and to let it cost her within an inch of her life, then run with it, but otherwise, consider other possible flaws.

For a healer, a good flaw to consider would be conceitedness. Thinking only of oneself presents interesting and violent conflicts with the humble generosity of the healing profession, and it would make for an incredible story. You don't have to use this flaw, but that's the kind of flaw I want her to have - a fundamental contradiction in her character that will take a whole story to work through.

Some examples of mine: One healer character suffered debilitating PTSD following years of torment - the healer needed healing, in other words. Another healer was racist (the healer refused to heal some people) and had a long fall from grace as a result.

Kiera could work, but find me a good flaw first. ;)
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Samdragonx
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<Snipped quote by Samdragonx>

Ravadon's background seems more like a whole life-story than a background. It starts with his birth, which is fine, but ends with his death, instead of ending at the point where our RP begins. It tells me a lot about Ravadon except for where he is now in his life.

At what point in the story does our RP begin?


I'm guessing near end. Must have gotten a bit carried away with my storytelling... xD

I'll cut out the princess + death and then post it in CS.
(Though his seasoned hero-days are something he's not used to in this universe and will start out like everyone else...)
"He sought out the cave she'd mentioned. As the cards burned in his hand, he walked in through a crack in the rocks. After a brief moment of flailing his bodyparts in any direction, he plunged face first into sandy floor of the human city Southhaven.
"
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by ineffable
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@Thinslayer
Yahoo! It's finally done. It's a bit weird especially about her powers and stuff so tell me if it needs improving?


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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by Durnehviir
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