@Burning Kitty I think both of them have potential. What I would say, is make sure that they don't become caricatures. What I mean by that is, the Jedi with Mandalorian armor. I love the idea, just make sure that it can fit into a story. There is a lot that can be told by a Jedi in Mandalorian armor, trust me, especially if she meets any Mandos, other that Boba Fett (who isn't a Mando).
I also don't have an issue with the other character, just make sure to remember that kyber crystals are sentient in their own right. Sith crystals aren't red because they found red crystals somewhere. Sith/Dark side crystals are red because kyber is naturally in tune with the light side of the force. So, when a darksider uses a blue/green/etc lightsaber to kill out of anger, or fear, or any other dark emotion, the crystal begins to bleed. When the crystal bleeds, the saber blade takes on a red hue. So, your character would need to have done some nasty stuff, and it would need to be said for sure to flesh her out.
Other than those things, the rest looks okay, to me. It's a character sheet, not a character requirements sheet. So, with development, most of the character sheet can originally change, anyways. So, I'll say accepted for either of them...though the second one is a little more intriguing to me.