Brendon lifted his shirt off with (un)surprising speed, and Ryan had half a second to trace his thumb over his bottom lip caught between his teeth just before moving out of the way for the fabric. His touch kept naturally gravitating towards Brendon's face, tracing his features and curling fondly around his silhouette, and in turn Brendon's hands moved down his body now that his chest was bared. Ryan remembered to be a little self-conscious about it - but at this point he'd earned so much endless praise and flattery from Brendon about how he looked that it was hard to muster up much self-hatred. For the longest time he didn't think that was really a thing, that you couldn't be cured of your own insecurities by someone else, but he at least valued Brendon's opinion so much that he held it close to his own heart regardless of whether he agreed/believed him or not.

Either way he still shivered at every touch, even more when Brendon's lips came close to his ear. More than you know. There it was - the praise. Ryan turned his head to him while he was still close, meeting his gaze carefully before smiling slightly and kissing his cheek gratefully. As self-assured as Brendon was, there was no way he knew exactly how moved Ryan was by how he talked, how much of an effect he had on him. No one could know, really. I intend to. Ryan laughed softly at his counter, raising his eyebrows right back at Brendon because he wasn't as lilting and seductive as he was, more just dorky, and accepted his weight with a quiet gasp. One of Ryan's hands escaped down to hang on to Brendon's hip, thumb wisping over the bone newly visible and dipping just barely beneath his waistband.

I’m so glad I met you, and I’m so glad we decided to do this. Ryan was nodding rapidly, his mouth slightly agape as it was wont to be around Brendon and no one else, but the heat was momentarily put on pause a beat later. Ryan didn't catch on right away, hands still coaxing over his skin, still entirely involved with him. I- I’m sorry I treat you like shit sometimes. Don’t argue, I know I do. He did stop, then, and was still tempted to argue, smoothing Brendon's hair aside repeatedly because he was adamant on telling him that he didn't treat him that way. If he did, vaguely, it was because Ryan was kind of an asshole half the time, too, and when he was, there was rarely any real reason for it apart from his own feelings getting to him. So Brendon didn't really treat him like shit, but evidently he thought he did strongly enough to put them on hold momentarily, so Ryan tentatively heard him out.

Nobody’s ever been as nice to me, as genuine with me as you have. Even Gabe is flaky. You’re... dependable. He was paid to be, in all fairness, but Ryan supposed that apart from them literally sleeping together he also went above and beyond in the friendship department. Most employees didn't give a fuck how their employers thought about them, much less how their employers thought about everything else in the world. He nodded a little, dazed. I do care about you, even if I don’t show it very well. And you’re very handsome. Ryan's chest was unbelievably warm, and he was so focused on the TV static sensation that he barely registered the movement of Brendon's hands again or the kiss he was granted. "And that helps," he tried to joke with that last comment, half-smiling, but he was clearly taken aback by the rest of Brendon's sort-of speech. He was too sweet, sometimes.

Ryan was torn on how to respond. He wanted to laugh about it over the phone with Spencer or something, 'cause that's what he used to do with silly crushes, but this was becoming a lot less silly feeling by the day. And then he wanted to tell Brendon everything about how he felt, but that'd freak him the fuck out and ruin all of this, probably. And if he tried to limit everything he said so that he was at least reciprocating what Brendon'd just kind of confessed to him, then there was the chance that maybe he'd... come out with everything else too, and that was an unsavory thought. Ryan had been silent for a few moments, still looking dumbfounded as ever, and blinked at Brendon repetitively like he was an angel in fuzzy light before trying to talk. "Thank you," he whispered, painfully quiet, and bit his lip for a fraction of a second. "You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say all that."

"In case it wasn't obvious," he added, swiping a thumb across Brendon's jaw affectionately, "I care about you, too. Like you'd say- 'more than you know.' And I guess you're pretty cute." The way he looked at Brendon, you might've thought he was in love, so the joke was fairly clear there. He really thought Brendon was about the most gorgeous person alive, commented on it whenever he got the chance - even in public, since the beginning. Apparently he had no reservations on that part, ever. Before we go to the point of no return- would you rather stay here, or go somewhere else..? Ryan regarded him more seriously. "Bold of you to assume I have the patience to move to a bed or wherever, right now. Look what you've done to me. I look like I ran a mile. Stay." The 'point of no return' part was doubtful, though, considering that now all Ryan wanted to do was hear Brendon talk like that more and more and endlessly, but. Wishful thinking. To act like it was his first priority anyway, Ryan made away with the button on Brendon's jeans, slipping a hand beneath the fabric and exploring the smooth skin on the side of his hip while he tried to push for more charm. Ryan tilted his chin up to try and speak closer, lower. "What made you say all of that? I like you talking that way."

Right then, there were too separate moods at a dichotomy, driving Brendon’s mind and body in distinguishably different directions. The majority of him wanted to finish what they started, was driven by a lustful subtext that was pretty much constantly there for someone like Brendon, while a smaller part of him was swelled with emotion and a strong feeling of attachment he wasn’t used to, affection beyond what he was willing to show or feel. This imbalance was vaguely uncomfortable and alien to him- his physical desires were never usually diluted by any emotional turmoil- and this wasn’t even a turmoil, it was a soft, gentle feeling that made him want to just sit there and kiss him chastely, no further goal in mind. But Brendon wasn’t even really aware that kissing didn’t always have to be a prelude to something more- sometimes kissing was kissing, it was showing affection, it was comfortable, calm intimacy that Brendon wasn’t used to giving or receiving. So, even though the vast majority of him wanted to accelerate and shed more clothes, the tiny pockets of gentleness were strong enough to render him more easygoing and gradual. They had all the time in the world, he told himself- then shook his head free of the dangerously sentimental thought.

Ryan was handsome, and responsive, and gentle, and somehow still awestruck and even awkward in situations like this, even after they’d been through it many times now. Brendon wasn’t sure whether to be offended or not- it didn’t seem like a compliment, but then again, maybe he just had an immobilising effect on people. It had happened before, he just didn’t care enough to notice that people were so breathtaken by his presence, his touch, everything about him. With Ryan, he was more attentive, so he noticed the short, escaped gasp, the pressure of Ryan’s fingers on his hipbones, his hands just below his waistband. Brendon felt it all vividly, his senses pleasantly overloaded for once. He busied his hands on Ryan’s skin as he spoke, eyes down, no idea what he wanted to say, just winging it as he went along. He cared about Ryan a lot- as his assistant, his best friend, his semi-casual lover- and the knowledge that he had been a dick to him more times than he cared to remember hurt, and invoked guilt in his gut that was prevalent whenever he looked at him and thought about it for too long. Ryan didn’t deserve that- didn’t deserve to be the brunt of the needless stresses of a spoiled rich kid.

Brendon bit his lip for just a moment, eyes distant, that refocused and leaned in to kiss a very distracted looking Ryan. And that helps. Brendon shrugged one shoulder, but nodded, matching Ryan’s tentative half-smile. ”Yes, it does help.” Ryan was quiet for a while, understandably- Brendon had reprimanded him for talking too much and then there was he, dropping his guilt on Ryan’s shoulders while part of him fretted about Ryan’s reaction and the other part told him who cares, what are you doing, this is not sleeping with him, by the way, get your priorities straight. He told that part to shut up for just one second. Thank you. Brendon smiled, shrugged, uncertain. You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say all that. Was he really? Replaying all the words he had said in his head, Brendon was wincing, because he sounded almost callous, like he was saying it to half-ass addressing the unspoken between them, or just to make himself feel better. That wasn’t the case, and Brendon didn’t know how to explain that, so he just trusted that Ryan really was genuinely grateful.

In case it wasn’t obvious, I care about you, too. Like you’d say- ‘more than you know’. Brendon smiled, briefly resting his forehead against Ryan’s as he drew a thumb gently across his jaw. And I guess you’re pretty cute. He let his jaw drop slightly, eyebrows raising, unimpressed. ”You guess?” He questioned, shifting slightly again and putting pressure down against Ryan’s hips, vengeful. ”That sounds uncommitted. You’re reallt starting to offend some people.” Ruffled, but mostly unaffected by the poorly thought out comment (for someone like Brendon, anyway), he moved on, finally deciding they should actually do what their relationship entailed- or what it was supposed to entail. Bold of you to assume I have the patience to move to a bed or wherever, right now. Look what you’ve done to me. Brendon did, and he found that he liked the picture. I look like I ran a mile. He smiled, shrugging with faux-innocence. Stay. That one word was unbelievably compelling. He stayed.

He was about to speak again, but then he looked down and Ryan had done away with the fastening on his jeans, and he raised one eyebrow, faintly amused but mostly glad he finally had some initiative in him. Ryan’s hand was beneath the fabric and at his hip, and Brendon’s eyelashes dropped low over his eyes, his vision a little hazy as he shivered at the gentle touch. He was barely paying attention when Ryan spoke again. What made you say all of that? I like you talking that way. Brendon blinked, pulled his arms back from over Ryan’s shoulders and moved them up to frame his jaw, pulling him in for and fully ignoring his question for the entire duration of what became a passionate kiss. When he could avoid it no longer, he drew back, bit his lip. ”If you just wanted to talk, baby, you can go home and call me,” He said archly, raising his eyebrows and deciding to fully settle back into the cushions, leaving his legs in Ryan’s lap. ”Or, we can talk later. Sound like a plan?”

At his most genuine 'thank you's and generally touched response, Brendon looked dubious, as if Ryan would lie about being grateful or something. No, he definitely meant it; most people found themselves touch-starved on occasion, but for Ryan (who was proving to be way more sensitive than he thought himself to be, as time went on), it was virtually the opposite case. He longed for reason to believe that he meant something to someone, that he was important in someone's life, and here was Brendon telling him everything he needed to know. And Brendon was charismatic, could say whatever he wanted to get by, but there was nothing to sacrifice his invulnerability for. He had no reason to make it all up - and besides, he wasn't a jerk like that. No matter what, Ryan knew, Brendon wouldn't resolve to measures like that for anyone, much less his friend.

The words were easier for him to get out, had been on his mind and prepared as a script for a while now, so when Ryan returned the sentiment it was notably less remarkable. Still, he couldn't pass up the opportunity to say something like that to Brendon with appropriate timing for once. Brendon came to rest his forehead against Ryan's and he was pretty sure he was going out of his depth here. It was all endlessly romantic, and they were never that by any means, unless it unintentionally slipped into their daily interactions. Regardless, he could only hold his gaze for so long until the closeness was overwhelming, and he shut his eyes briefly as if he were checking whether the dream might disappear once he reopened them. It wasn't usually like him, but to inject a little humor into the circumstances he severely downplayed how exactly he viewed Brendon- cute, and dismissively, no less. As if. Sure, that was true, but he could also fill a notebook with plenty of other more colorful descriptors.

Apparently, Brendon didn't think he was all that funny. Ryan grinned at the shift in his expression anticipatorily, raising his eyebrows challengingly. You guess? All right - it stopped being funny pretty quickly, since Brendon was dead set on revenge. Ryan's smug smile dissipated for a moment, another quiet exhale drawn from his lips as Brendon pressed down again, and then he tried staying headstrong with a quick return to smiling triumphantly. That sounds uncommitted. You’re really starting to offend some people. Ryan attempted a casual shrug in spite of their entanglement, and looked semi-apologetic. "My bad, gorgeous," he tried again to replace just ‘cute’, fingertips scratching lightly at the nape of Brendon's neck. The list went on, voice turning velvety the more comfortable he got in these unfamiliar circumstances. "Stunning... handsome... striking. How's 'enchanting'? You're very princely. It'd work."

Unfortunately - and he knew it, so he wasn't too hurt when the attitude shifted - their little moment had to end sometime, despite his efforts to keep Brendon talking and opening up. At his careful initiative, Ryan unintentionally must've moved them along quicker than he'd expected. There wasn't a lot of time to feel bad about that when he was more focused on Brendon, everywhere, dominating his thoughts. For once Ryan was the one to draw a reaction from him and he smiled at the way Brendon lost focus, once again self-satisifed, but apparently things always had to be out of balance 'cause he was quickly back to his state of being constantly caught off-guard. Brendon unexpectedly brought his hands up to shape his face, and Ryan was fairly certain he'd never been kissed as passionately before, barely able to reciprocate for a good second. Or maybe he just couldn't access his memories at the moment. Stupefied, he brought his free hand around to cradle Brendon's jaw, too, mirroring his actions as best he could with the distraction at hand.

If you just wanted to talk, baby, you can go home and call me. Baby. Ryan barely focused on the rest. As Brendon moved back, Ryan's hand venturing past his waistband glided up along his side again until he could no longer reach him, dumbstruck. Or, we can talk later. Sound like a plan? 'Later' sounded distinctively like maybe he wouldn't see this side again for a long while, but Ryan supposed out of all his options, going home was the worst... as amusing as it was to imagine. He studied Brendon for another moment despite the question not requiring any hesitation, then answered by closing the gap between them again, making a promise with himself for no more delays since he was generally responsible.

It'd only been around one when Brendon got home, and therefore they had very bad timing in that Ryan woke up in the evening, sun still out but dropping so the sky painted the walls amber through Brendon's window. They must've passed out for three hours, maybe more. To be fair, Ryan never slept anyway before then, and Brendon had been dealt a fairly shitty day - wait. Almost immediately after waking Ryan panicked a little, remembering he'd definitely promised to deal with all of Brendon's other plans, and what if he was too late now and not everything would be done by tomorrow, and why was he so concerned when he was pretty much in his dream spot. He was still entangled with Brendon, Brendon evidently too deeply asleep to have found some other place to escape overheating - and it was fairly cold inside anyway. Ryan's chest was pressed to his back, one arm slung loosely over his side, face tucked against his hair comfortably. And his other goddamn arm was dead asleep. Was a sudden wave of worry and the vaguely painful sensation worth moving for?

Not really, he decided, but he was familiar with the routine in which he had to get away in a timely manner, give Brendon his space. Two things were different, now: Brendon hadn't awoken first and disappeared to make himself a drink (or two, or three) or take a day-long shower, and they were... a lot gentler, closer, than they'd ever been before. Ryan didn't really like taking chances like this because they usually blew up in his face, but fuck it; thankful they were on Brendon's couch rather than a normal one they'd be even more stuffed up in, he barely shifted away, running his hand through his hair and over his face to recalibrate.

Ryan propped himself up unsteadily on his dead arm to look at Brendon, wondering how to approach this without potentially scaring him in the confused waking state, but then again Brendon was used to waking up to company. Bonus that it was more of him lately. Bold, he curled a hand around Brendon's shoulder, smoothing his thumb back and forth before trying to turn Brendon more towards him. "Hey, B, wake up, I think my arm's done for," he said fairly quietly, voice lower from sleep. He almost tested out 'baby' the way Brendon had used it, but. "Also, I feel you should know that you look especially Apollonian right now." He grinned, amused, first at the dim light-drenched Brendon then throwing a glance over his shoulder at the sun responsible for illumunating them.

/

Ryan was right, Brendon was not willing to settle with being called just ‘cute’- he had lived the back end of his entire adult life appearing at the top of ‘hottest celebrity’ lists (stupid, trivial and shallow things, sure, but they did a lot for his already-massive ego) and being fawned over by the entire younger population. The older people tended to think he was a bad influence, which was fair, but not Brendon’s fault. He never wanted to be any kind of influence. He just wanted to enjoy his life for everything it was worth- including right now, shirtless and entangled with his very attractive assistant (now that was a tabloid-worthy story he was sure would get out sometime or other) on his expansive sofa, a few leagues away in headspace than he was, maybe, five minutes ago, when he was telling Ryan how much he cared about him. That was not a typical Brendon thing to do- but this is, He thought, pressing down just to get revenge, to provoke some kind of reaction. Success- Ryan’s smile faded for a moment and there was the faintest exhale as he tried to keep it together. Brendon was drunk on the physical influence he had on him, grinning smugly- but then Ryan was scratching gently at the back of his neck and he visibly relaxed, eyelashes fluttering. My bad, gorgeous.

”That’s better,” He confirmed, studying Ryan absently as he tried to think of more suitable words to fit him. Stunning... Handsome... Striking. Brendon grinned effortlessly, squeezed Ryan’s hip and moved his other hand so he could swipe his thumb across his collarbone; he was preoccupied suddenly by the blank canvas of Ryan’s skin, and realised with some surprise it had been a while since Brendon made his presence known even after they parted. Pressing his lips against the bone, he trailed a few kisses off to his shoulder, each slight touch a small promise. How’s ‘enchanting’? You’re very princely. It’d work. Huh. Those were new ones. Brendon lifted his head, speculative, and repeated the descriptors in his head, distantly wondering how narcissistic this seemed. ”I’m not a Disney Prince,” Came his final answer, as he lifted his head and moved his other hand down to rest comfortably at Ryan’s waist, ”Though I think that’s my next calling. Brendon means ‘prince’ anyway, so it’s perfect. Get that appointment sorted for me.” Was he joking? It was difficult to tell. Usually, Brendon was teasing about anything- unless the other person took him seriously, and in that case he wouldn’t complain.

It was nice to talk like this with a little less urgency, but Brendon could only be patient and still for so long, so in a bid to move things on a little faster and pull Ryan out of dreamland, he cradled Ryan’s jaw and pulled him close and met him in a kiss that lasted until Brendon realised that oxygen was a thing they both needed. It seemed to work, anyway, because Ryan looked completely dumbstruck, taken by surprise. Amused, Brendon pressed a sweeter kiss against his cheek just before he moved back out of his arms and lay back, shoulders against the opposite armrest, legs still tangled with Ryan’s. For a moment he wondered whether Ryan needed any more convincing, and his hands went automatically to his own zipper, but apparently not, because in moments Ryan made up his mind and closed the gap between them, much to Brendon’s obvious delight. The flirting beforehand didn’t usually take so much time, and though it had been sweet, refreshing, Brendon blamed his own bad timing. Profoundness could have easily waited til after.

The two of them were evidently creatures of habit, because almost immediately afterwards they fell asleep together every time- Brendon’s self-assigned rule of leaving right away had been forgotten between them a long time ago, and Brendon told himself it was because it was just so much easier to settle down and sleep rather than drag himself up and dressed when he didn’t really want to. Brendon was fast asleep until Ryan started shifting about inconsiderately, and then he was faintly awake, aware enough to know that somebody was lying on top of him, pressed against his back- but it took a few moments to recalibrate and remember who it was. Ryan. Thank fuck. If it had been anyone else, he’d have to get up immediately and ask- no, tell them to leave, and he didn’t have the willpower or energy to do so. With Ryan, this was okay, he didn’t mind, in fact he liked it- Ryan’s body comfortably against his, his body heat radiating through his skin, and there was a faint hum of calm through his body anyway, a good feeling ringing in the ends of his fingers. Ryan was so good, he registered with a sleepy smile, deciding he wanted to stay like this and not move for as long as he still felt like he couldn’t. Brendon was close to drifting off again- but then Ryan shifted above him, and he reluctantly opened his eyes, complaining through a low, tired groan.

He felt a hand curled around his shoulder and then realised Ryan was trying to turn him over. Obeying, if only to more quickly get Ryan to stop moving, he shifted onto his back, habitually running a hand through his tousled and messy hair. His chest rose and fell rhythmically, but it was still slightly laboured and hitched, as if he was trying to catch his breath. Hey, B, wake up, I think my arm’s done for. Brendon seemed uninterested, just stretched out, arms lifting behind his head and then falling to his sides. ”My entire body is done for. I need to go back to sleep,” He mumbled, voice heavy from weariness. Also, I feel you should know that you look especially Apollonian right now. Brendon reopened his eyes, raised his eyebrows. ”Greek Gods? Really? If I didn’t think you were gay before...” Brendon was grinning, his eyes crinkling, but he was still tired to the point where he couldn’t even find the energy to move his legs, and it took a lot to move his arms. ”You tired me out,” He commented absently, through a smile- then he wrapped his arms around Ryan’s waist and tried to pull him back down, closer, so he could go back to sleep.

Although the usual set of commandments Brendon followed for himself had stopped applying to Ryan long ago, he still often became worried that maybe this time was different, he was going to get run out as soon as Brendon woke up or Brendon would run away himself. He walked a thin cord, balancing carefully between Brendon's rampant mood changes and his exhausting indecisiveness as to whether he was to be an emotional person or completely not, and Ryan always tried steering him in the direction he'd been going earlier before they'd turned physical. Ryan liked all of it, everything between them, but he did have his preferences. He liked when Brendon said what he was thinking, and when he truly meant it, he liked when he could catch Brendon off guard rather than just earn a smug grin and something like 'I know,' he liked everything tender and gentle that came so few and far between with the two of them. Ryan knew it wasn't healthy to treat him like a boyfriend in his head like that, but. He honestly couldn't help it.

So he was careful when he awoke, moving gently and making himself as unintrusive as possible, so that if Brendon did want him to leave or vice versa maybe his softness would change his mind. Evidently, it wasn't necessary; Brendon woke up fairly quickly alongside him, Ryan could tell with the change in pace of his breathing. When he leaned over, too, he could see the slightest, sleepiest smile, and there was a surge through his chest, another dangerous feeling too close to that of a boyfriend. He needed to fix this issue - but he saved it in the back of his mind for now, savoring the serenity of the moment, the way there was no contesting his presence here. First the talk hours before, and now this unrelenting welcome... Ryan was pretty sure he hadn't had a day as good as this one in a very long time. He grinned in amusement down at Brendon's tired figure as he groaned impatiently, eyes opening tentatively. So maybe Ryan was a little inconsiderate, but. He wanted to see him, desperately.

Brendon turned over onto his back, and Ryan watched his hand glide through his hair, so tempted to toy with it along with him. And- temptation was apparently very strong. His hand slid from Brendon's shoulder to his hair, absently curling locks around his fingers, his forearm framing the side of Brendon's face. Brendon appeared to still basically be asleep, barely listening and stretching out at length like a cat. My entire body is done for. I need to go back to sleep. Ryan arched an eyebrow, smirking knowingly while images from hours previous flashed through his mind. "Is that a compliment? Testament to my ability?" A little too proud for someone who was probably not as responsible for Brendon's current state as the comfortable couch was. Nevertheless, Ryan held onto it, trailing his hand down from Brendon's hair, to his collarbones, chest, navel. Somehow he instantly had energy, enough to want to map out all of Brendon's skin, though it wasn't all that surprising considering under the circumstances he'd be overenthused regardless.

Greek Gods? Really? If I didn’t think you were gay before... Ryan grinned right back at him, feeling the overwhelming urge to kiss right where his smile reflected on the corners of his eyes, and of course he followed through, leaning down quickly in a bizarre juxtaposition to Brendon's slow, placid movements. "You had your doubts? I must not be doing well enough." Evidently he'd woken up cocky - and Brendon kept giving him more reason to be. You tired me out. Ryan watched him for a moment, tranquil, suppressing any overindulgent thought that threatened to rise to the surface when he saw the easy smile on Brendon's face. The task became harder when Brendon pulled him down, arms looped round his waist, and Ryan's chest was suddenly pressed to his, keeping his chin raised so he could continue watching a very exhausted Brendon attempt to sleep.

"Clearly," he said softly, closer to his ear, and sort of silently laughed, drawing his now-tingling arm up to cushion Brendon's head. "Told you I could." He let his head drop, face nestled close to the crook of Brendon's shoulder, his hand returned to the other side of his head only to brush absently through the hair behind his ear. He shifted a little until he was more half-on top of Brendon, half-fitted along his side, rather than letting his hipbones dig sharply into the poor guy. In fact he was overly careful ensuring all of his points and edges were kept away from him. After a pause trying to sleep but unable to on account of holy hell this is real this is happening, plus the fact that his arm hurt almost unbearably, Ryan spoke again, voice low against Brendon's jaw. "All the stuff you were saying earlier, about..." Caring. Fuck. He couldn't get it off his mind. "You meant all of that?"

Brendon was an emotional person- he’d just learned to hide it extremely well or manipulate it to his advantage, or rather, he just really wasn’t that sentimental. Nobody had ever taken the time to sit down and tell him how much he meant to them, so Brendon didn’t believe that he did mean anything to anyone, even when Ryan had told him outright a number of times just how important he was to him. He simply found it too hard to believe, and it was understandable; even his closest friends, Gabe, for example, though in action adamantly and fiercely protective of Brendon, had never taken the time to properly ask how he was doing. To be fair to Gabe, they usually needn’t ask- they had learned by now how to read Brendon like a book- but still, Brendon craved that kind of attention, that kind of validation, he supposed, but he also fiercely rejected it when it came along because he was scared of getting his hopes up, getting hurt, being so vulnerable in that way. It was strange- he was so comfortable with, to be crude, taking his clothes off with practical strangers, but he wasn’t confident enough to let people see under his metaphorical protective layers.

Though he had learned to trust Ryan, he had still been hesitant to even let him in further than surface-level shit, which was so odd juxtaposed to the nature of their physical relationship. Brendon was desensitised to the supposed emotional intimacy of what they were doing, because he’d never experienced it that way. This was confusing, because though Brendon felt the usual, common attraction towards Ryan, there was something underlying- a geniune fondness, a desire to be around him and not just for a particular reason, just an excuse to enjoy his company. He felt that strongly now, having been peacefully awoken by Ryan’s gentle movements, taking a moment to calibrate and remember it was Ryan who was settled against him, relaxing when he realised he wouldn’t have to get up and kick somebody out. A rush of affection started in his chest and flooded warmly through his body, and this was reflected in his slow, sleepy smile. A few moments after that, he registered a dull ache in his muscles, too, and wondered absently whether that was Ryan’s doing, or it was because of their unorthodox sleeping positions on a couch (even if it was the considerable size of Brendon’s).

He was encouraged to turn over, and he did, though with a sigh of protest- he kind of just wanted to go back to sleep and recover. Instead, he blinked up at Ryan, and felt that pesky flush of fondness spread inside his chest again, illustrating it with a faint smile. He reached up to his hair to comb through it with his fingers, against the protest of his muscles, and then dropped his arm back to his side when Ryan’s hand replaced his, carding gently through his hair. Brendon wondered distantly whether he was dreaming- he never woke up like this with someone, the sensation and situation was completely alien. He felt a little faraway, distant- but he was aware enough to notice that smirk, and his bit his lip, suppressing a grin of his own. Is that a compliment? Shut up. Testament to my ability. Brendon closed his eyes briefly when Ryan’s hand ran down his torso, then opened them again when the contact left him. ”Well,“- He tilted his head to the side and trailed his fingers along Ryan’s collarbone- ”Let’s just say I wouldn’t mind a round two.” Brendon grinned, dropped his hand, then shrugged a shoulder. ”Hm, Maybe not. I’m fuckin’ exhausted.” Still, it was the thought that counted.

Brendon started to tease him, and when he trailed off, eyes glinting, he was taken by surprise when Ryan leaned in to kiss him. He wasn’t sure why it caught him off guard, considering the content of the replays flashing through his head from a few hours previous, but it did. Not that he didn’t enjoy it. In fact, he leaned up when Ryan pulled away, chasing. You has your doubts? I must not be doing well enough. Brendon shook his head, adamant. ”Nah. Ten out of ten. Would do again.” Giggling now, apparently drunk from a combination of this attention, the gentleness and the warm glow of the evening sunlight on his skin, he finally reached up and wrapped his arms decidedly around Ryan’s waist, pulling him back in so he could go back to sleep and wake up more well-rested than probably ever before. Only a few beats passed, and Ryan was speaking softly by his ear. Clearly. Brendon nodded, barely, eyes still closed. Told you I could.

Brendon opened one eye, then the other, feeling a smile tug at the corner of his mouth. ”Somebody’s cocky,” He murmured, not at all annoyed, just amused, because this wasn’t usually behaviour Ryan exhibited. He wasn’t complaining. Staying quiet while Ryan shifted to this side to get more comfortable, he closed his eyes yet again, finally ready to go to sleep. These five minutes of conversation were evidently wearing him out. Again, a few short moments passed, but then Ryan was talking again, and Brendon resisted the urge to move his hand and press it over his mouth so he’d shut up for one second. All that stuff you were saying earlier, about... Brendon set his jaw. Apparently it was useless trying to get back to sleep, so he shifted a little, so he propped himself up slightly on one elbow, and turned his head so he was facing Ryan, who had his face resting near the crook of his shoulder. You meant all that? A slight pause, and Brendon’s expression was unreadable. ”No, actually,” - He brought his free hand around to curl into Ryan’s hair- ”You wouldn’t shut up and I thought lying about it might get your clothes off faster.” Silence. Brendon grinned. ”I’m kidding, baby, of course I meant it.”