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. . .Hum the hymn of battle, an ancient tune to which the sounds of spear and shield clash in a frenzied air. Hear it sing all the way from the steep mountains of Ulgothe to the deep valleys of Ranaruun - known to some as Honor, and by others..."Diplomacy". Yet listen closer still and know the truth that lies within, for war is but a plague - intoxicating to the mad, a pestilence within nobility, and overbearing upon the frail of heart. Worse than that, listen too greatly and you may heed its warnings no longer - for wisdom falls deaf on the hollow ear.

The detriments of conflict are not to be taken lightly - yet for the clans of the mountain-homes, as nurturing as they are brutal, war is life. Theirs in an archaic and savage way, staking claims upon their neighbors' by taking up the sword and axe...but it is also a necessity; For when the lion and bear put down their arms and cease to struggle, the Vulture comes out to play...













(The introductory post will arrive. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ."shortly." Also, note that the "barbarians" in this universe are more equivalent to Gaelic tribes-people than Conan...but that's not to say you can't bridge the gap between those two aesthetics.)

Question @Virgil. Is there any magic, and is it a medieval setting?

@Shadow Dragon
Hey there Shadow - magic is quite rare in this universe, mainly performed by Gods and other powerful humans (because what's a powerful sorcerer/shaman if not a God yet to have staked a claim in the world?). In the societies of the Ulgothe Mountains, shamans are generally the only ones performing it at a consistent and perhaps even moderately powerful rate - but it is possible to have, say...a warrior capable of coating his middle-finger in flames and singeing an enemy with it when they least expect it (barbarians aren't known for much outside of their reverence for nature and prowess in battle). The main bad guys of our story (the people of Ranaruun) are somewhat more adept, but a powerful mage is still a rarity in their society; You'll definitely be fighting one at some point, and it will (probably) end in the quick death of anyone dumb enough to rush them head-on, but other than that magic is generally weak, enigmatic, and often far more dangerous to the user than their victims. As we'll see later on in the RP, even Gods don't have a tendency to cast particularly powerful magic on a common basis - because of course, anyone wise enough to make it to that point would immediately recognize the aftermath associated with the use of such power.

The setting itself is more Classical period, with the barbarians being based on the Gauls that fought the ancient Romans; In fact, the Ranaruun will be kind of like the Early Republic - they're a growing power with some strong potential, but're still learning their stride amidst the chaos of war and politics.

So in short, it's less Sword & Sorcery and more Rip & Tear.

Aw, I wanted to make a mage with dark magic he can't control. So he doesn't. Control it, that is.

But he would have little to no strength or stamina, and he is frail. He is very powerful, but also very frail. The magic draws from his personal energy to power his spells, so he can't cast very many without killing himself.

(Make sure to edit your post if you need to tack on an additional comment - makes it easier to read and less traffic-throttling)

Hmmm...well, I can see that going in one of three directions:

1. He's a shaman/shaman's apprentice that particularly loves battle (despite the usual wisdom of shamans) - perhaps he feels he'd put his "skills" to better use against the enemy than his friends.

2. He's a warrior with some small, random level of talent in conjuring; He uses these random outbursts of unexpected power (spitting acid, scalding people with his hand, sneezing fire, et-cetera) to compliment a serious lack of combat skill...and/or to supplement a weaker physique (perhaps he unknowingly has a tape-worm and can never seem to get enough food to build up a good amount of muscle).

3. He's the child of a Ranaruun slave, a byproduct of those brought with certain clans during their exodus, those made to serve as generational stewards and lackeys to powerful members within these "families." Having been brought up among the Iron Elks, he considers himself an Ulgothen, and seeks to prove his loyalty (and perhaps earn his freedom) by tapping into the power of his particular genetic disposition. Also, his master(s) may or may not be attempting to get rid of a potential risk by simply chucking him into the first battle available - even barbarians are somewhat wary of the dangers of an enraged or underappreciated magic-user.

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@Shadow Dragon

(>_>) - "It's not a phase!" (...he says while unknowingly melting into the wall.)

Anyway, I'll get on to working up the introductory post - the clans make camp atop Krolm's Anvil after a weary march, preparing for the traditional bloodshed to come in the morning.

(...and there isn't a way to delete posts, sadly - so be careful in how you execute them!)

I like the first one best. Some rebellious kid with magic powers fighting instead of healing. Also, what kind of names are they? Like, do they have the whole tribal name setup, like, Eagle-who-watches-clouds (Eagle) kinda thing?

Alright, heading off for the day (things to do!); the introductory post isn't much, but I'm only warming up anyhow. As for the names, I'd say sticking with a first name (Yullar) and a last/nick name would work just fine ("Laxtongue") for anyone who doesn't have a highborn title or rank accompanying them (War Captain). Good luck with your character sheet and your first post, I'll be looking forward to it!

What kind of mount is he using? A horse, or some magical creature, or what?

Just for clarification, Hertla and her son are Yullar's personal house-slaves - where he goes, they follow. Additionally, the whole point of Krolm's Anvil is to settle power-disputes between the clans; Every generation or so (10 years, give or take) the most powerful clans each send a warhost up to decide which clan is more or less proclaimed leader for a time, allowing for a Rule of the Fittest type of leadership while still maintaining relative autonomy from one another. Losers usually pay high tributes in terms of resources - it's entirely possible for certain smaller clans to join forces and pool together a warhost, even going so far as to meld older, weaker clans into whole new ones in order to have a stronger chance at rising up the political ladder.

Of course, as very briefly alluded to in the post, it's also possible for clans fade into obscurity or die out entirely, perhaps splitting off and joining others just to survive. The struggle for dominance is a constant dance of variables in the Ulgothe mountains.

@Shadow Dragon

...How many Anime/Soap-Operas do you watch?

I've seen three Anime. Pokemon, Digimon, and random clips of One Punch Man.

Well I can't say they've influenced you for the better - I can see the direction that you're taking because of it, and frankly, your writing feels disconnected from the rest of the RP:

For starters, your mechanics feel stiff and unnatural, made all the worse by Socorro needing to be given a solid emotional connection in order for the reader to care about his otherwise lackluster motives. If I break the flow of the action. By splitting a sentence too early instead of fleshing it out and leading into the next. It hurts the reader's immersion in my story and my characters. Now obviously I'm no expert in this field, I'm practically a novice myself what with the ease with in which I lose interest in what I'm writing, the at-times strange grammatical decisions I make in trying new angles, or my simple inability to write more than a paragraph at a time before having to press the enter key and move on to the next line. Yet despite all that, I'm at least trying to make the flow of my stories feel immersive - I want you to imagine you're THERE, in the thick of it, observing craft and character alike in Real Time...and static writing doesn't give you that immersion.

Next...your character, man; Now yes, drama comes in many forms, but I think it's fair to say that as with any craft you really ought to grow past the basics beyond a certain point - and Socorro is as basic as they come. He's a cut-and-dry stereotypical JRPG youth with a dark and/or mysterious past, a strange feeling that he doesn't fit in and/or is hated by all (probably because the only emotions available to that type of character are angst, fear and apathy), and an overwhelming power that comes at the tragic price of bum-all. To top it off he's subject to the errors of Tell, Don't Show - exposition and internal monologues ram backstory into scenarios in which it has no right to be, and they take away from the other forms of development your character could be engaging in (talking with other characters via natural dialogue, showing through action/inaction, describing through allusion or subtle comparison).

Finally, in keeping with the terms of an immersive atmosphere, your style of writing seems to push everything else BUT your character to the background - and that's especially antagonizing BECAUSE he has nothing interesting to say or feel. This is an RP, and while every character has their own role to play, the general idea is for the players to work together in order to create an interesting, collaborative story. Socorro's role here mainly seems to be exposing/progressing a bland backstory in order to...focus on him; That's it, that's his ultimate role in the story - self-inflation. Yullar isn't exactly a saving grace, but at least his self-centered, carefree, battle-loving nature (and subsequent death...Spoiler) is supposed to be a symbolic and short-term bit of foreshadowing for the plot, in addition to progressing it through its first stages in the battle atop Krolm's Anvil.

As you can tell, I feel pretty damned serious about this...but with all that said and done, I'd actually like to continue to progress this setting and sharpen my skills through this RP, because I still think it can work - but I can't justify continuing it as two separate stories trying to merge into one. So the question that arises here is, "Can you change for the better on this?"

Yes, I'll try. Sorry about that. I haven't been in many rp's with this kind of character. The main thing that I was trying to go with is that most of his powers come from possession of a much more powerful being, and he's experiencing backlash from their connection. The things he's seeing and feeling are being blended with the memories of the entity he's connected to, so the things he's seeing in the dreams aren't there, they'er from some other point in time, and/or another location, but his mind is trying to associate the images with stuff that he knows about. He might see some battle from a hundred years ago, but his memories interfere with it, making him think that he was somehow involved. He's always had this, so he has no idea how much of the world is real anymore.

Well alright then - give me another post to prove your word and we'll see where that puts us.

@Shadow Dragon That's definitely a better attempt, but you've still got a long way to go before you really progress out of your older habits. I don't think it'll work here, and thus this is where the RP'll have to end, but I wish you good luck in all of your future RPs; G'day!

Oh well. Maybe next time.