1 Guest viewing this page
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
Raw
GM
Avatar of Thinslayer

Thinslayer

Member Seen 2 mos ago

@Rhiven Knight
It was! I especially enjoyed the atmospheric description of his home and personal life. It's hard to put my finger on it, but the way it was put together really helped evoke images of the scene. Definitely has good re-readability. I like your style; don't change it.

Consider slowing down a bit, though; the pre-council introduction to Dr. Hawthorne was supposed to be significant. It's okay, though - the doctor has a good sense of humor. :P
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by AtomicNut
Raw
Avatar of AtomicNut

AtomicNut Abusive Contractor

Member Seen 2 days ago

@Thinslayer

Second prince is brooding.
2x Laugh Laugh
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Rhiven Knight
Raw

Rhiven Knight

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

Well I am glad it was enjoyable and the end goal of the post felt like it was getting to the council chambers, not necessarily getting to the doctor based on my letter sorry i misinterpreted.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
Raw
GM
Avatar of Thinslayer

Thinslayer

Member Seen 2 mos ago

the end goal of the post felt like it was getting to the council chambers, not necessarily getting to the doctor based on my letter sorry i misinterpreted.

I figured as much; I likely would have done the same thing in your shoes. That was my bad. Maybe what I need to do is use descriptions to draw interest. If I had spent a little time introducing the doctor to you in the letter and gave a reason why Rhayven should interact with her, would that have helped?
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Rhiven Knight
Raw

Rhiven Knight

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

On the other hand you may now introduce the doctor for everyone in the council chambers.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
Raw
GM
Avatar of Thinslayer

Thinslayer

Member Seen 2 mos ago

That's true. I was going to wait for @Celsius and @Pie Flavor, though. Let's give them a couple days.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Darkwatck01
Raw
Avatar of Darkwatck01

Darkwatck01 The Last Transcendent

Member Seen 4 yrs ago

From what I understand Nebel and Aarkenhan are currently outside. Nebel is sitting on the stares to the entrance while Aarkenhan is currently just crowd watching.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
Raw
GM
Avatar of Thinslayer

Thinslayer

Member Seen 2 mos ago

Anybody want to read short stories while we wait? :D
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Rhiven Knight
Raw

Rhiven Knight

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

oh i just meant in your first post for the council chambers.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
Raw
GM
Avatar of Thinslayer

Thinslayer

Member Seen 2 mos ago

On the other hand you may now introduce the doctor for everyone in the council chambers.

I think I'll do that. In the meantime, while we wait for the others to post, I'd like to write a few short stories set on Aion. Currently working on one already 'cuz I'm bored. xD
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Rhiven Knight
Raw

Rhiven Knight

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

Rhayven's grandfather fought in the unification wars, if you are looking at needing knight characters for stories set in the world earlier.
1x Thank Thank
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Darkwatck01
Raw
Avatar of Darkwatck01

Darkwatck01 The Last Transcendent

Member Seen 4 yrs ago

Well I can offer that for the most part Nebel's Family has been members of Ispar, serving from Knights, Guards, Merchants, even civil servants. Yet they have all been Hexer's. From day one they start learning till they are in there twenties.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Rhiven Knight
Raw

Rhiven Knight

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

Ten years of magic college for Rhayven, then fifteen years in the knights, serving in every campaign during those years honing his skills that way. He isnt exactly a veteran compared to some of the best, but he also isnt an untested novice.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Rhiven Knight
Raw

Rhiven Knight

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

I am excited, and I am glad this is started.
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
Raw
GM
Avatar of Thinslayer

Thinslayer

Member Seen 2 mos ago

Extra Lore: Halflings

These creatures are dwarves with a certain set of genes that eliminate facial hair. While some stories consider them a different race (and the dwarves would agree), they are definitely one and the same. Like most dwarves, they prefer living underground, but unlike most dwarves, they favor dirt and tree dwellings over rock and stone. They tend to live on the Riftgard frontier where security is lax, so they are often at great risk of getting raided and pillaged. Thus, they tend to fear outsiders and hide as much as possible from them.
Hidden 6 yrs ago 6 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
Raw
GM
Avatar of Thinslayer

Thinslayer

Member Seen 2 mos ago

Extra Lore: Guntag, the Dwarven Architect

The legend that dwarves are master craftsmen is mostly a bunch of bunk; that honor goes to the elves. It's Guntag (pronounced goon'-tog), an architect, whose masterful dungeons and elaborate temples single-handedly spawned that legend. The Ancient weapons left behind in the Apocalypse War were deemed too powerful to leave out in the open, so the Four Kings paid him to create secret dungeons for them in the four corners of the continent. They took the locations of these dungeons with them to their graves.

While there are a few people who possess clues to the locations of one or two, only one person alive in the whole world knows where all of the dungeons are.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
Raw
GM
Avatar of Thinslayer

Thinslayer

Member Seen 2 mos ago

I should probably clarify for everyone that the dragon attack from the intro did not happen in Southaven, but in Brixton, a city further up north.
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Pie Flavor
Raw
Avatar of Pie Flavor

Pie Flavor No ordinary Pie

Member Seen 2 yrs ago

Will change to reflect that, thanks!
1x Thank Thank
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Rhiven Knight
Raw

Rhiven Knight

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

So one more post from Atomic then you can spin us up into round 2?
Hidden 6 yrs ago Post by Thinslayer
Raw
GM
Avatar of Thinslayer

Thinslayer

Member Seen 2 mos ago

@Rhiven Knight I was waiting on @Celsius. I'll wait until tonight for an update, and if I don't hear anything, I'll start on the next round.
↑ Top
1 Guest viewing this page
© 2007-2024
BBCode Cheatsheet