With all the eyes in the room on him, Julan could not help but to feel nervous. He felt that his parents would want him to be cautious, especially since this rite wasn't really necessary for him. After all, they would be leaving the village sooner or later, and it would not really matter if he was officially one of the tribe or not. But, he knew his grandfather would be disappointed if he refused, and probably even more angry at Janius. Even Julan had picked up on the fact that it was not difficult to get Zharan upset at his father. "I can do it, I think. I don't think they would want to let people die in the rite, so it shouldn't be that bad. Right?"
Zharanthixil nodded. "Correct. Deaths are quite rare, as there are potions and healers available to assist. The rite of might is often attempted, though still the most rare to complete, aside from the rite of endurance. It is not often that an apprentice can outmatch a more experienced, physically superior opponent. You must be confident in the training your father has given you."
Zharan walked straight up to Janius, stern as usual, but perhaps less aggressive than before in his posture. [i]"I will admit, it is a surprise to me that you are even allowing this opportunity for your son. I had assumed an Imperial would be too soft to allow his son to take these risks, but I was obviously mistaken. I had feared you had turned Kaleeth away from the ways of her people, but perhaps she has helped to make you more like us? Indeed, you are...not at all like what I expected. Perhaps I am guilty of misjudging you."
Ahnasha grunted briefly and started to continue on forward deeper into the forest. "And that is the real trouble, isn't it? The ultimate purpose of any fighter is to be able to kill when needed, but you have no way of knowing if you have that strength until the time is upon you. It is not easy, not at first, but I cannot understate how important it is to be able to go through with it when it does happen."
It was as if the forest itself grew quieter as their conversation grew darker. Ahnasha continued on in the same neutral tone, regardless of how uncomfortable the topic may have made Rhazii. "Whole graveyards could be filled with the corpses of those I have slain, even just by my own hand. I am far more closely acquainted with death than any woman probably should be. I know well what killing is like, and I have seen what can happen to warriors who hesitate. I have seen new recruits in the heat of battle, fearing for their lives, but able to carry out their training just on instinct, until they get to the part they're not trained for. I remember one time pretty clearly; a skirmish, I think somewhere in the West Weald. There was this young, fresh-faced Imperial in a scouting party we were working with. We got into a fight with some enemy scouts, and naturally we were winning. The Imperial ended up outflanking the guy I was fighting and jabbed him in the gut with his sword, disarmed him and everything. The boy moved in to finish him, and he looked like he had it handled, so I moved on to the next target. But, the Imperial boy stopped. He hesitated. The enemy scout was terrified, begging for his life, probably soiled himself out of fear. Maybe the Imperial boy had never killed before, or had just never had to finish someone who didn't die right away, but all he got for his brief moment of mercy was a silver dagger through his heart. Killed him pretty much right away; nothing we could do for him."
Ahnasha finally looked back at Rhazii. "I'm not saying you shouldn't be a warrior. I'm just saying that, as your mother, it is my responsibility to make sure you are as safe as I can make you, and that you're prepared to do what you need to do. You've grown up most of your life around Nords, so I'm sure you've heard all about the honor and glory of battle. Really, you're probably more like a Nord child than a Khajiit, if I'm being honest. But, fighting isn't all glory. It's dirty, bloody, nauseating at times. And it's brutal. You have to be able to watch a man's life fade from his eyes because of the sword you just jammed into his ribs, or kill someone who, in their final desperate moments of terror, is begging for their life. It's not pretty, and it's not easy, but it is reality."
Zharanthixil nodded. "Correct. Deaths are quite rare, as there are potions and healers available to assist. The rite of might is often attempted, though still the most rare to complete, aside from the rite of endurance. It is not often that an apprentice can outmatch a more experienced, physically superior opponent. You must be confident in the training your father has given you."
Zharan walked straight up to Janius, stern as usual, but perhaps less aggressive than before in his posture. [i]"I will admit, it is a surprise to me that you are even allowing this opportunity for your son. I had assumed an Imperial would be too soft to allow his son to take these risks, but I was obviously mistaken. I had feared you had turned Kaleeth away from the ways of her people, but perhaps she has helped to make you more like us? Indeed, you are...not at all like what I expected. Perhaps I am guilty of misjudging you."
Ahnasha grunted briefly and started to continue on forward deeper into the forest. "And that is the real trouble, isn't it? The ultimate purpose of any fighter is to be able to kill when needed, but you have no way of knowing if you have that strength until the time is upon you. It is not easy, not at first, but I cannot understate how important it is to be able to go through with it when it does happen."
It was as if the forest itself grew quieter as their conversation grew darker. Ahnasha continued on in the same neutral tone, regardless of how uncomfortable the topic may have made Rhazii. "Whole graveyards could be filled with the corpses of those I have slain, even just by my own hand. I am far more closely acquainted with death than any woman probably should be. I know well what killing is like, and I have seen what can happen to warriors who hesitate. I have seen new recruits in the heat of battle, fearing for their lives, but able to carry out their training just on instinct, until they get to the part they're not trained for. I remember one time pretty clearly; a skirmish, I think somewhere in the West Weald. There was this young, fresh-faced Imperial in a scouting party we were working with. We got into a fight with some enemy scouts, and naturally we were winning. The Imperial ended up outflanking the guy I was fighting and jabbed him in the gut with his sword, disarmed him and everything. The boy moved in to finish him, and he looked like he had it handled, so I moved on to the next target. But, the Imperial boy stopped. He hesitated. The enemy scout was terrified, begging for his life, probably soiled himself out of fear. Maybe the Imperial boy had never killed before, or had just never had to finish someone who didn't die right away, but all he got for his brief moment of mercy was a silver dagger through his heart. Killed him pretty much right away; nothing we could do for him."
Ahnasha finally looked back at Rhazii. "I'm not saying you shouldn't be a warrior. I'm just saying that, as your mother, it is my responsibility to make sure you are as safe as I can make you, and that you're prepared to do what you need to do. You've grown up most of your life around Nords, so I'm sure you've heard all about the honor and glory of battle. Really, you're probably more like a Nord child than a Khajiit, if I'm being honest. But, fighting isn't all glory. It's dirty, bloody, nauseating at times. And it's brutal. You have to be able to watch a man's life fade from his eyes because of the sword you just jammed into his ribs, or kill someone who, in their final desperate moments of terror, is begging for their life. It's not pretty, and it's not easy, but it is reality."