[IC] APEX

[HangYourSecrets]

Kieran floated in liminality for some time—not quite asleep, and not quite awake. The alcohol swirled through his veins, giving him no sleep. He could not remember the last time he had allowed himself to become as drunk as this.

His mind raced—images of Aura, the evening, the face of the man he had killed, all mixed together. One amorphous being. And behind it, behind it all, the jagged mountains. Those that loomed light shadows upon Apex. So close, and so far.

He had read their names in a book one. Cascadia. An impassable region. Where once any family could easily cross in a few hours.

Now? It was suicide. Dense, thick forests. Glacial planes. It would be a journey without a way back no matter if they crossed over or died in the brutal cold.

Kieran’s eyes shot open and his body out of bed. He panted in his cold sweat for just a moment, before his eyes looked down.

And saw the empty makeshift bed, and knew exactly what had happened.

The laptop, the plan…all gone. Gone with Aura.

And funny enough?

He didn’t feel the least bit angry.

** **

Kieran took a few moments getting ready to head out.

He splashed his face was cold water, and pulled on a typical dark, long coat for him. He laced his boots and pushed his worn body through the door.

He moved automatically—without knowing where he was going or what he was doing.

As he turned to close the door, his hands clasped around strands of hair. He jumped at first, dropping the bundle in the dark to the ground. But as he bent down to pick it up, he knew exactly what he held.

And couldn’t help but laugh. Quietly at first, but then, so loud he could feel the echo bounce from shipping container to shipping container. Throughout the muck of Port Apex.

“A meeting with the gods,” he muttered to himself.

After this, he pocketed the bundle and moved towards the only source of comfort he had on in this wretched place.

A crane—one of only a few—still standing beyond what had ended the old world. Its bending metal upon its base showed that its days were numbered, but he couldn’t help but climb it again and again as a kid.

Up here, ages ago, he had met Honeyman for the first time. He received his first mission here and had even shared his first kiss right at the top.

As he climbed the rusted staircase and rose higher and higher into the night sky, he couldn’t shake the overwhelming feeling that he was climbing it for the last time.

And truthfully, he was.

As he reached the top—some two hundred feet into the air—he turned to see the Apex skyline.

It was a funny thing, really. A mix of antiquated buildings and wretched amalgamations that Apex Authority had attempted to construct. But without the technology of the old world, the best they could make were abominations—writhing from the ground level of Apex and standing alongside towers crumbling and bent with the wind.

He wondered what this place used to be like. His mom had told him the name once when he was young. On the night he was sent off to this place. He had tried to remember it as he drank with Aura earlier that evening, but it came clearly now to him.

Seattle. That was it. He wondered what it had meant.

Whatever it was, of course, it wasn’t much these days. But maybe that could change. Maybe he was venture off to the east and one day hear stories about what came of Apex.

But all these thoughts faded into the howling wind as he heard a gun click, and cold end of a pistol touch his temple.

“They told me to go right to your home,” Honeyman said, his voice cracking. “But I knew I’d be dead before I got the door open. So I waited. I would have shot the girl too, if I had better confidence in my aim.”

Kieran quelled the tension in his gut and turned to face his former mentor.

Honeyman looked the same as he did just a few days prior when they had last spoken. His floppy hair seemed to whistle in the wind. Nothing looked different but his eyes. Red and puffy, they avoided Kieran’s gaze and shot daggers into the metal scaffolding below them.

“You’re going away with her?”

Kieran thought for a moment, then:

“Yes.”

“I figured as such. With the way she sliced her hair off. You don’t do that unless you’re dead either way.”

“Why are we still talking?” Kieran asked. He spoke calmer than he thought he could. “Do what you’ve got to do.”

“K, please,” Honeyman shot back. “We both know only one of us is climbing down those steps. The least we can do is talk.”

Kieran kept searching for his eyes, but Honeyman hid them—holding his pistol high to his face, making Kieran stare down the barrel. The gun shivered in his hands, and his fingers dripped with sweat.

“Let’s take a walk then, huh?” Honeyman offered. Without awaiting his response, he gestured with his pistol out to the scaffolding that lined the top spine of the crane. As he complied and paced out towards the ocean, he felt Honeyman’s heavy footfalls pace behind him, almost in synchronicity.

Together they walked out over the black, lapping waters two hundred feet below. To the edge of the crane that dangled over oblivion.

Kieran placed a hand on the ice-cold guardrail at the end of the line. He turned again to face the barrel.

“What gave us away?” he asked.

“Only two people know your password for the black seal. You, and me. I have to say, you got sloppy. I trained you better than that.”

“Circumstances changed quickly,” Kieran replied.

“So did alliances, I assume,” shot back Honeyman.

A moment of silence between the two of them passed.

“So is this your ticket into A?” Kieran asked. “Turning me in?”

“Turning you in, yes,” Honeyman. “Killing you gets me to B. I’ll settle for B.”

Kieran couldn’t help but laugh. And funny enough, Honeyman joined in.

“How did you let it go this far?” he then asked, his tone suddenly, sharply dark.

And to be honest, Kieran didn’t have much of an answer for that. A short time ago he had a system, a plan. The means to survive.

But as he looked past the barrel of the gun, past Honeyman, and the crane, and the city skyline…towards the distant mountains and their apexes illuminated by the night sky, he realized something.

Should Aura come back, and should they make it out alive, he wouldn’t have the means to survive.

He’d had a reason to hope.

And as he looked back to Honeyman, the man between him and the mountains, they locked eyes once again.

And suddenly, Kieran understood.

His chest panged, and before he knew it, he was crying.

“Hey now,” Honeyman said. “No reason to cry, K. They’ll treat you well before your execution.”

“I’m sure,” he eked out. His voice cracked and moaned with the crane. “And you’ll like A. Pretentious lot they are. You’ll fit right in.”

The wind howled again at them. Honeyman’s pistol was shaking even stronger. Kieran watched as he placed his finger on the trigger. Then Kieran widened his stance.

“How much time will I have?” Kieran asked.

“Hours, at best,” Honeyman replied. “Aim to be out by noon. That’s when they’ll be ready for you.”

Kieran’s face burned with a white-hot rage. “Is that all you’re worth to them?” he asked. “Hours?”

“Nevermind it, boy,” Honeyman nearly whispered. “It doesn’t matter now.”

The two men swayed. And for eternity the world stood still.

“K…do it.”

And so he did.

A shot rang out just past Kieran’s left ear as he pushed the pistol out of his way. And in one foul motion, Honeyman was tossed into oblivion.

The sounds of the wind and waves hid his crash into the sea.

And one man descended the scaffolding with a pistol in his hand, alone.

** **

Kieran returned home and feigned sleep a while longer—still in his clothes underneath the covers. He awaited for Aura’s return, and couldn’t help but feel relief as the door opened and Aura returned to bed.

He waited another twenty minutes before sitting up.

As he searched with his eyes towards her side of the room, he could see Aura’s sleeping form resting on the floorboards, beneath the sheets. Sharp-edged yellow hairs stuck out from the sleeping form. Absentmindedly, he twirled the black strands still is his pocket as he watched.

He rose silently and began to gather a few things—rations he had stolen from armed men. Tablets designed to purify water until they arrived at glacier-fed rivers. Things light enough not to cause suspicion but good enough to use until they could find items to survive on the other end of town.

There was a whole city between them and the mountains, he thought to himself.

He did make one exception, however. He opened a small drawer by his bed, and moved a few belongings aside.

Underneath it all was a handful of chocolates.

If we survive to next week, he thought to himself, at least she’ll have some chocolates.

** **

He waited as long as he could until the sun began to shine into the room, before opening a wayward curtain and shining the right directly upon Aura.

He waited until she moved, then rose, and finally, made eye contact with him.

It was apparent that both of them had had what was possibly the worst night of their lives. Her eyes shone from recent grief, just as his did.

“Good morning,” he said. He didn’t wait for a response.

“You probably already know this, but…” he trailed off, thinking for a nice way of phrasing it.

But then again, there wasn’t really a good way to phrase it, was there?

“I think it’s time we left Apex. For good.”

[megatrash]

Before she was even lucid, Aura could feel the aches in her bones that were in contact with the hard floor beneath her. Ugh, then the headache. Where was she? With what felt like all her might, her eyes struggled to open.

”Good morning.”

In an instant, Aura was ready to defend her case. Why she left. Why she took the laptop. That she had to be out of Apex sooner than later and that she’d be leaving with or without him. But, for once, the mystery man all too readable, mainly because he looked exactly like she felt.

Tired, out of options. But behind the worries that seemed to present in the lines in his face, a calm that reminded Aura of a lighthouse in a storm sat in his eyes. And it was then, in the sweet, thick silence that hung between them, that she knew that she trusted Kieran no longer just because she had too.

”…I think it’s time we left Apex. For good.”

Aura opened her mouth to speak, but only a soft croak came out. There were so many questions, and she was unable to verbalize one. Next, she saw the bags and knew that he meant what he said. He always meant what he said.
She stood up, Kieran’s blanket crumbling around her feet and the hoody sinking down to just above her knees, her large brown eyes glossy with tears. She had never felt so helpless, weak. All of this was impossible without him, and they both knew it. But Kieran, whether it was because the AA was closing in on them or that he truly wanted to leave with her, he was leaving all he had behind too. All because she ran into him on the street.

And with her eyes on the ground, Aura closed the gap between them and embraced him tightly, his heartbeat in her ear as she carried on squeezing him. Once the silence became deafening, she was unsure of how much time had passed and stepped back abruptly, using her sleeves to dab her eyes.

“I, um, I’m gonna get ready, I –“ She halted as her fingers ran through her hair, which now just barely brushed her shoulders. “My fucking hair,” she mumbled. “I’ll explain everything on the way…” Her cheeks flushed red, and her eyes darted to the doorknob, which no longer held the present she left behind.

In embarrassment, she grabbed a pail filled with water and waved a hand as nonchalantly as she could to Kieran, as if the past five minutes had not taken place. “Just gonna wash up. I’ll be ready in ten.”

But as soon as she disappeared out of his vision, Aura stopped and leaned on the wall, a smile tugging mercilessly on the corners of her lips. It was not a time for happiness, but she savored the feeling for a moment before shaking herself out of it. They had an escape to plan.

[HangYourSecrets]

Kieran watched as Aura rose, unsure of what came next.

What would come next?

The question bounced around in his mind without much of an end. There was little they could bring—as the more they carried on their backs, the more they brought undue attention upon themselves. They would need to travel quick and light—moving in the hopes that the old retrograde homes that sprawled between here and the mountains would provide some brief respite.

Then there was the issue of the massive lake that lie between them and the mountains. The only way he knew how to cross were the tunnels that he and Aura had used to meet up. But accessing those tunnels meant traversing back towards the Maw, and talking with the Apex guards who may or may not be willing to hear him out.

How long did he have again? Kieran considered how Honeyman had phrased it. He figured by midday, it would be common knowledge that both he and Aura were fugitives.

His goal would be to make it out of the city before that word got passed to the guards that blocked his path.

“I think—” Kieran managed to croak out, until he felt Aura press against him.

Immediately, his cheeks flushed a bright red—and he found himself thankful Aura had pressed her face into his chest so that she wouldn’t be able to nice.

’She’s so small,’ He thought to himself. He didn’t mean to think it—but the thought crossed his mind the moment he wrapped an arm around the small of her waist. Whether it be from malnourishment or statue, he suddenly recognized the size difference between them both.

His mind raced to the first night they had spent together—with her towering over him as he lay prone on the ground, a boot digging into his side—and now, as he embraced her in her home.

Two souls eastward bound, to god knows where.

Perhaps it was the isolation of his life, or perhaps it was just how he was raised, but he found himself more and more unsure the closer he became to Aura. And he was close to her—make no mistake. He had chosen to leave the only home he knew with her.

But as Kieran fumbled through his feelings, and as he held Aura close to him, he began to act more instinctually. The last of his racing mind faded out into the air around them. He leaned into the gray, the unknown—both of what was to come of the future, and what was to come of them.

And without a second thought, his right arm raised. His palm found its way to the nape of Aura’s neck, and his fingers brushed their way into her freshly cut hair. He held her head softly and lowered his chin to rest upon Aura.

She pulled away soon after, and Kieran found himself briefly holding on, before letting her slip from him. As he released, he felt something odd and fresh between her shoulder blades. He thought briefly to ask further, but thought perhaps now wasn’t the time.

“I, um, I’m gonna get ready, I –“

“Of course,” Kieran said in response. An automatic reply. He turned from her as she from him, moving towards a smaller bag that could slip comfortably under his long black coat.

He had luckily spent many nights away from his home on mission, and was able to quickly assemble a bugout bag. Rations, rope, twine, fresh socks, knives—there was a lot packed into a very small space. He make sure to snag a few water filtration tablets, as well as a small fuel canister, a lighter, and handheld gas stove. Looking over his shoulder to see Aura prepping, he opened the bag and continued loading as much as he could inside for two.

It was hard to know what should be taken—particularly when considering he would likely never see this place again. He wasn’t a man of much sentimentality, but there was one thing he wanted to take.

He reached below his bed and pulled out a box. Brushing aside papers and objects he had collected, at the very bottom, he found what he had been looking for.

A small vile, corked at the top and filled to the brim with white-gray sand. Sand from the beaches of his childhood. From the last and only place he knew much peace.

He slipped it into his bag in a smaller compartment he knew wouldn’t take a hit.

Once he had prepared, he waited on the bed—deliberately sitting in a spot where much of his home wasn’t visible, as to give Aura space to change. Once she had finished and returned, he rose before she could even close the gap between them.

“I know why you did it,” Kieran said. “Returning the laptop, I mean. I get it. Gregor and the rest…they didn’t sound like easy people to have an out from.”

He couldn’t say he wasn’t entirely over the issue of the laptop, but what did it really matter now?

“My thinking is if we can get to the tunnels and cross the river by midday, no one should be after us and I can still use my Runner credentials to get us access. A friend—” Kieran stopped himself suddenly. The thought of Honeyman and the crane last night flashed into his mind. He brushed it aside. Now wasn’t the time. “My old boss told me last night we’d have hours at best if he went missing before all of Apex would know to find us. So…we have hours.”

He stood and moved to the door. “I’d love to hear more on the way,” he said, bringing out a smile. He felt a little better now; knowing he had an objective he wanted to go towards.

Or rather, a reason to live.

“I like the haircut, by the way,” he said, half-teasingly. “For a midnight rush job, you did a pretty damn good job.”

He cracked the door open. From here on out, they would be on the run.