[IC] The Spider's Web, A crossover roleplay

[JonxlatheLion]

You wake up in a sort of lounge. The speaker in the far upper corner starts to say something, but it's not very audible over your grogginess. As you begin to awaken more, it clears up and you just make out this. "My name is the intelligence, I will be your host today. I apologize for my lack of appearance, Difficulties are preventing me from accessing the outer parts of my amazing facility. Have a wonderful day and enjoy your stay in the web!"

Now would be the time to get to know each other.

[Scarifar]

Medic had just died from the Demoman's sticky grenade and expected respawn at the usual spawn point, but something felt... odd. "Ohh.... vat is happening?" Medic asked. As he slowly overcame his grogginess, he realized that he was the first one to wake up. He grabbed his medigun and other weapons, making sure they were in working order. Satisfied, he looked around. He recognized no one, except for the Engineer. A evil grin began to appear on his face, as new people meant new test subjects to put baboon organs into. He chuckled evilly as he thought about it, then realized that he had none of his medical equipment nor his baboon organs with him to perform said experiments. "Neeargh, vat a vaste," he thought. He decided to try waking up Engineer first, aiming his medigun at him and then shooting his medibeam at him.

[docblargle]

The first thing that Stern felt as he awoke was rage. He had been so close this time. M'Kachen had almost been his, finally! Instead, some sort of beam shot out of the foul daemon, knocking him out. As he examined his surroundings, he was immediately aware he was somewhere else. His space marine physique allowed him to quickly come to his senses, fortunately, as he examined his armor's readings. Fortunately, everything remained functional, and his gear was still with him. He stood to his full stature of eight feet tall, his white armor bearing the crest of his chapter, and gazed around at the room. It was such a strange layout. Then Stern was aware of the others in the room, and he swore by the throne. He immediately drew his force halberd, finding himself surrounded by a strange crowd of xenos and heretics. Only one other being seemed awake yet, a human with a strange device strapped to him. Clearly, he was a heretech. His full hulking stature approached the strange man, and he aimed his wrist mounted storm bolter right at his face. "You there, Heretech!", he shouted in a booming voice, his vox amplifier making him even more intimidating. "What foul thing have you done? Where am I?"

[Nerevarine]

Karkat woke up and blinked, looking back and forth while still laying down. He felt at the floor under him, his sickle still there. Sitting himself up, Karkat noticed a familiar face next to him. "Terezi!" he shouted, pushing on her until the other troll finally woke. "Ugh, what are you shouting about now?" she said, still laying on her stomach and making no effort to get up. "I dont know if you took note, but we seem to have been plucked clear from the cozy ball of rock we've been hurtling through the far reaches of paradox space by the hand of god and tossed out into a common room in the middle of who the fuck knows?" he retorted, poking at her more. Terezi groaned at took a sniff of the air, and soon her expression changed to one of shock, "I think i get what you mean", she replied, standing up and smelling at the air more. The two trolls took note of the many others around them, Karkat quick to point out the presence of species that even the spacefairing trolls had never heard of. But what really got them was the fact that there were humans. Karkat looked over to see two adult humans, one of which was significantly taller not that far away from them. "Hey! Can one of you metal wearing shit stains tell us where the fuck we are?" he shouted at them, Terezi simply standing unimpressed.

[docblargle]

Stern hadn't even received an answer from the strange, white clad heretech, when he heard someone else call, "Hey! Can one of you metal wearing shit stains tell us where the fuck we are?" Stern turned his head towards the noise to see to strange, short, horned xenos of a species he had never seen before wait expectantly for an answer. At the mere sight of them, his eyes narrowed beneath his helmet. They clearly had no idea what had happened, and neither did this strange man he had begun to interrogate. He turned back to the heretech, and said, "You got lucky this time, Heretech, but don't think I'm letting you go that easily." Turning back to the xenos, he raised his storm bolter and aimed it at them. Setting his vox amplifier to a more intimidating setting, he said "Alright, xenos filth, here is what is going to happen. You are going to help me find out where I am, how I got here, and how to get back where I was, and I'm going to consider not purging you in the name of the God-Emperor!"

[WanderingDragon]

The first thing Zhang heard over the announcement was someone shouting something about a 'God-Emperor'. When he came to, he noticed a some sort of gargantuan machine-like being aiming what appeared to be a gun at two creatures. He had never seen or heard of whatever pokemon the grey-skinned, horned beings were, but the first and only thing he saw was a metal thing threatening them.

Grogginess notwithstanding, he moved with Extreme Speed and kicked the metal being's wrist in an effort to knock the pistol away and then slammed his paw into its torso as hard as a semi-aura charged Power-up Punch would allow. "Leave them be!" He yelled out telepathically then conjured along bone staff and pointed it at the metal one. He cocked an ear back at the two horned ones behind him. "Are you alright?" He asked then noticed a human in a labcoat firing some weapon at another human. There was the initial impulse to attack him when he noticed the weapon's power didn't seem to actually harm the unconscious man. 'What is this place?' he asked himself.

[docblargle]

Suddenly, out of no where a blue... thing charged Stern with a speed and precision that rivaled that of a Vindicare Assassin. What ever it was, it hit his wrist mounted storm bolter, knocking his aim off target. It followed up by punching Stern in the torso with a force disproportionate to its size. It was enough to push him back slightly, but it didn't even dent his adamantium armor. Stern's first reaction was indigence. "You dare..... You DARE touch ME xenos?!" he shouted, his vox amplifier casting it at full volume. He saw the blue xenos conjure some sort of bone. Immediately suspicious, Stern checked his armor's readings. Stern was surprised to see warp energy around the bone staff, and residual warp energy where he had been punched. So not only was it a xenos, but a warp sensitive xenos as well. There could be only one course of action now, as dictated both by the imperial creed and the codex astartes. Stern drew his Nemesis force halberd, and activated its power field with his own warp energy. His armor began to feed his body with adrenaline, and he readied himself into a combat stance. "Xenos filth!" he shouted at the blue dog creature. "I am brother-captain Arvann Stern of the Grey Knights, and my blade will be the last thing you ever see! Now face me coward!"

[Scarifar]

Medic had been watching everyone wake up one by one, watching with fascination. They looked like they were created for battle. Such wonderful specimens to experiment on. If only he were at some sort of hospital. Oh well, maybe he could ask them for their organs. Then again, he had no place to store them. What a pity, seeing all these creatures and no way to dissect them without leaving their internal organs intact.

He then looked at his comrade Engineer, wondering why he hadn't woken up yet. Pondering this, an idea soon formed in his head. "Engineer, there's a Spy!" Medic called out to him, hoping that that would work.

[Nerevarine]

Karkat suddenly was filled with alarm at the sight of the gun raised at he and Terezi. Then suddenly, a blue creature jumped in to attack the would be assailant. The troll watched as the two beings began to face each other, "oh fuck no!" he said, suddenly jumping out of the way, tucking behind Terezi and drawing his sickle, though clearly unwilling to become a part of the ensuing fray.

Terezi, however, was not about to allow this to become anything more. She quckly pinpointed the two, raised her dragon cane high above her head to create a loud crack on the floor, and then looked at the two of them and shouted as loud as she could, "I will have order in this block!", quickly smelling at the air and doing her best to try and show that she was glaring at them under her blindfold. She hoped that this would stop the needess fighting right away, best to have them around long enough to determine if they were useful as allies in this strange place.

[GreenGrenade]

Sonic the Hedgehog remembered being in the middle of eating a delicious, mouth-watering chilli dog, savouring each tiny particle of the food on every one of his taste buds. So imagine his surprise when he woke up in a sort of lounge, extremely groggy, and no chilli dog in sight. This made the Blue Blur frown a frown as curvy as the rainbow. As he regained enough of his consciousness, he noticed people he'd never seen before fighting and screaming and generally causing a ruckus. Observing the conflict, two questions popped into his head; where was he, and just what the hell do these people think they're doing? Instead of lying still, he decided to find out.

Just as he flipped up onto his feet, a blindfolded girl demanded order in the room, an air of authority surrounding her. A long moment of silence followed, and Sonic took it as an opportunity to speak.

"'Sup guys and gals! The name's Sonic, Sonic the Hedgehog. I'm not from around here, and from what I can tell, neither are you, so I'm going to skip the '"Where am I"' question and go straight to the good stuff. Which is as follows... JUST WHAT THE HECK WERE YOU ALL THINKIN', FIGHTIN' EACH OTHER LIKE THAT? THAT WAS WAY PAST NOT COOL!"

He cleared his throat, calmed himself down, then continued.

"What I mean by that is that we hafta try and get along. If my years of fightin' Eggman taught me anythin', it was that friendship is one of the most valuable things in life. And from what I can tell, none of us are here on our own accord. So whadda ya say, chumps? You all reckon we can be friends?"

[docblargle]

As the blindfolded, horned xenos demanded order, Stern was just preparing to charge his assailant. Such a demanded was even more an affront to his honor, even though she clearly never had seen a space marine before, and didn't understand. Regardless, something was bothering Stern with the whole scenario. It wouldn't hurt to pause and think his situation over. Stern decided to remain on guard, watching the dog xenos, while thinking his situation over.

The, out of nowhere, another blue xenos, this one with a weird array of spikes on its back, went into some sort of speech about how he was wrong to try to fight the dog xenos. Clearly, the fool had never heard of the imperial creed. Then, as if to speak even more volumes to the thing's idiocy, it asked if they all could be friends. This time, Stern could not restrain himself, as he mockingly laughed at the xenos. "Friends!?" he said. "Are you some kind of fool, xenos? Your very existence is an affront to the imperial creed of mankind! I'd sooner be a friend to heretics and renegades!" Stern took a pause, then continued. "However, in light of our circumstances, I will restrain myself for the moment. But I will not lower my weapon."

A few things came to mind. First of all, none of the humans seemed to recognize him. True, the Grey Knights were a secret chapter of the space marines, but space marines themselves were fairly hard to miss. They were a part of all human history and culture, and yet he went unrecognized. The second thing that was off-putting was that the xenos clearly didn't recognize him either. This could be explained by the fact that they had never encountered the imperium before. But then how did they know low gothic? That was a question he could answer right now. He turned to the horned xenos and asked such a question. "Xenos, you clearly have never encountered the imperium of man before. If that is the case, how do you speak low gothic, the common language of humankind?"

[WanderingDragon]

Zhang looked between the trolls and the metal one calling them 'Xenos' and speaking of an 'Imperium of man.'. Realizing he should have done so before, the Lucario closed his eyes and focused his aura to his eyes. With his Aura Sight, he saw that the metal thing was merely a suit and there was a human inside. Things seemed to make less sense the more he spoke. Perhaps Zhang was not as well traveled as he thought, but he never heard of such a thing as what this human spoke of.

His attention went to the hedgehog and looked him up and down. He finally decided to say something, "Have we met?" He asked the hedgehog, "Somehow you look familiar, but I can't seem to place why."

[Scarifar]

Medic examined each being that was with him, noting their physical traits on a clipboard. He had to see just what they were capable of. He aimed his medigun at the eight foot tall man with the impressive weapons and fired, the healing beam reaching him in seconds. Medic figured he was the most impressive looking of the bunch, although the blue and black creature wielding blue energy was a close second. "Ah hello?" Medic asked, taking out his syringe gun. "Vould any of you like to donate your blood to science?"

[Nerevarine]

Terezi thought for a second on how to explain these things to Stern. "I'm speaking Alternian, my native language." She spoke, "I think the reason you humans speak it might have something to do with your species being created by our game. I mean i thought that was why cool kid and his friends could talk to us," she then spoke up again, smilling a toothy grin full of sharp teeth, "I was not aware there were more of you though. We thought humans went extinct except for the kids in our game," she then laughted at the thought.

[WanderingDragon]

While waiting for the hedgehog to respond, Zhang perked up at the horned ones saying something about all humans being all but instinct. He felt a pit in his stomach and began to worry if perhaps Team Flare had been successful in this insane mission. Then he looked back at the human in the lab coat who pointed a weapon at him. "I would rather you put your weapon away." He said to him and now held the staff in front of him, preparing himself to block or dodge anything shot at him.

Things had gotten out of hand very quickly.

[docblargle]

While waiting for the horned xenos to answer, the human with the strange contraption projected some sort of beam into him, bypassing his conversion field entirely. Suddenly worried, Stern checked his armor sensors to find that the beam was some sort of medical compound designed to accelerate healing and strengthen the body. However, since he was still distrusting of everyone in the group, he turned to rebuke what he had now discerned to be some sort of renegade medic. Before he could, however, one of the horned xenos answered him. The answer she gave made Stern seethe with anger. "What!?" he shouted in response to her answer. "That is HERESY! Mankind was created in the divine image of the God-Emperor! To suggest otherwise goes against ecclesiarchal doctrine! And human extinction!? Mankind is at its strongest it has ever been! Trillions upon trillions thrive in the uncountable worlds of the imperium of man. Holy Terra alone is host to several hundred billion." Something really wasn't adding up now, and it was bothering Stern. An idea occurred to him. He forced himself to calm down, and stated "Another question. This one is to all of you. What do you believe the year to be?"

[Scarifar]

"Oh, put that down and come over here," Medic said to Zhang, no longer pointing his syringe gun at anyone. "I promise I vill heal you." Medic didn't see what the problem was. He was just trying to get some blood for his scientific experiments. He wasn't even asking for their organs. Then the giant armored man asked them what year it was. "Simple. 1972," Medic replied.

[JonxlatheLion]

The speakers crackled and boomed in feedback "Well, well, that's enough of that now. You all must be scared out of your minds to be acting in such a way. You there, Grey Knight Brother-Captain Arvann Stern, do get along with your peers. You will depend on them one day during your stay here, trust me. The time for fighting isn't now, you will have plenty of hours to spend doing that while you're inside. Now, do please stand by here. I am trying to get this to work." Sparks fly from the lights and the room rumbles almost like it is moving. The walls fold into the floor and you find yourself in a huge expanse surrounded by what had to be mile-high walls of a strange black stone with purple veins pulsing some sort of energy. From the ceiling crawls the shape of some huge spider, and it soon shows itself to have a different body entirely, a human head and four arms along with the eight legs. "Greetings! Sorry for the rough entrance, as I said I had difficulties. Alright, let's see who's here... Karkat, check. Terezi, present. Zhang is here. The ignorant knight is present. Sonic, check. Medic, check... Hm, the Engineer seems to have lost his way to the facility, oh well. If he arrives i'll pop him in with you later. Now that that order of business is done, may the games BEGIN!" The walls shift and fly outwards, leaving a perfect maze in their place. Suddenly a platform underneath them slides through the maze, too fast for them to track where it was going. It stops when it reaches the start point, a small dead end on the edge of the maze. A speaker floats up from the platform. This little bot had a helicopter propellor, a camera, and the speaker. "Good luck. I will be watching you."
"Oh, and to answer your question, grey knight? It's the year 356, cycle gamma. For you that means it's the year 600078."

[GreenGrenade]

"Are you some kind of fool, xenos? Your very existence is an affront to the imperial creed of mankind! I'd sooner be a friend to heretics and renegades!"

Sonic smirked at the man called Stern. He was going to have a lot of fun with him. He'd already found a perfect nickname for him.

"Oh, come on, Girlfriend," the blue hedgehog said, "I just wanna get along, y'know?"

Then a humanoid blue dog approached Sonic, asking if they've met before. The guy sure did look familiar... As he pondered this for a while, a creepy-looking spider guy appeared, talking about some kind of game. It seemed that he was the one who placed everyone in this place-- whatever this place was. After this, an intricate maze replaced the rather dank lounge, and Sonic decided that he had liked the lounge a lot better. He then turned to face the blue dog, answering his question.

"I think we might've met before... I remember fighting a guy like you once. And a fat plumber. And a hot princess. I think we were on these weird floating platforms... Nah, that's crazy. Must've been some dream I had. But anyways, we've met now. I'm Sonic, if ya didn't catch my name before. Do ya think you could tell me yours? Otherwise, I think I'll start calling you Old Bluer, and I don't think you want to associate yourself with that reference."

Sonic then began mulling over what the creepy spider had said. It made no sense, and the hedgehog wanted make some out of it.

[Nerevarine]

Karkat burst into rage upon letting the situation sink in "oh no! No no no! Im not getting into another game of ragtag rascles use their collective 3rd rate think pans to solve some riddles, fillet the bad guys and win the day! No im not doing that again!" Though Terezi was quick to quiet him, "It doesnt look like we have a choice, Karkles, at least aside from the obvious one". Karkat growled, "alright then! Lets start this mindnumbing macroassembled labrinth of hell and get thid shitbrained paradox space defying cluterfuck of comrodery and pain started!"