[IC] Let Me Steal Your Heart [BuzzingBee + Dagger]

[Rogue Sloth]

Crow was relieved to hear that Penelope believed Gavin wouldn’t try to shortchange him completely on his supper that night. He didn’t mind eating his own food, but most of it had been purchased at the market in Whitebridge. While he didn’t like to praise nobles often, he couldn’t deny that their food was always of higher quality than the food of the outer villages. The meats were especially good, because they were spiced with seasonings from the inner kingdom that the peasants could never afford. Having a bit of an affinity for good food, the thief would have much preferred to eat whatever Gavin had prepared over the things he had bought at the marketplace.

He glanced down at Penelope as she told him that Gavin was talented at cooking. It was somewhat surprising to him that the knight would have such a skill, since nobles tended to have servants do such menial tasks for them. However, he also recalled the way Gavin had packaged their food the day before, and suddenly the knowledge that he could cook as well wasn’t quite so shocking. It seemed like the knight knew how to do more than most other noblemen.

As they stepped back into the clearing where the others had set up camp, Crow headed straight for the fire, where he could smell the scent of freshly cooked stew. As he and Penelope drew closer, he noticed Gavin glance in their direction only once before turning away again, clearly uncomfortable about seeing them return together in such a ragged condition. Olivia, on the other hand, beamed at them in amusement. She wasted no time in making a comment about it too.

The knight shifted a bit to make room for the couple as they joined them beside the fire. “I see you two had some fun,” she purred, plucking a twig from Penelope’s hair and twirling it between her fingers.

Crow glanced over at her and rolled his eyes. Normally, he didn’t mind bragging a little, but knowing Olivia, he guessed she was probably just trying to cause trouble somehow. So, he ignored her and reached for a bowl to fill up his portion of stew. Fortunately, it seemed like Penelope’s guess about Gavin had been right. The knight had left enough food for them that he was able to give himself a rather large helping.

Meanwhile, Olivia hadn’t given up on her mischief making just yet. The knight leaned a bit closer to her friend and nudged her side, interest glittering in her dark eyes. “Getting the most out of this mission, huh?” she smirked. “Not that I blame you. Thieves can be quite the satisfying lovers.” Her gaze flickered briefly towards Gavin before returning to Penelope’s face. “But I’m sure you know that already.”

[BuzzingBee]

Penelope moved to sit down besides Olivia as they joined the other two knights by the fire. She blushed at her friend's words as she quickly made a comment. The knight rolled her eyes at her friend and quickly ran her hands through her hair, once again trying to smooth it down as well as get out any of the grass that was left in it. Hoping to move on from the conversation, she reached over and took a bowl after Crow did, filling it up for herself.

Unfortunately for her, Olivia hadn't let the topic go quite yet. Penelope looked over at Olivia and rolled her eyes again. She opened her mouth to reply but before she could, Gavin spoke up. "Must you be so vulgar all the time?" the male knight grumbled quietly. He kept his gaze on the fire, seeming to refuse looking over at her or Crow.

"I've been decent all day, I should at least be able to have some fun now." Olivia shrugged and leaned back on the palms of her hands. She smirked as her gaze now focused on Gavin. "If you don't want us to discuss more...recent events," she eyed Crow and Penelope before looking back at the male knight. "I don't mind talking about the past either." Gavin flickered his gaze over to Olivia and narrowed his eyes, clearly a bit confused at what the female knight was hinting at. Penelope had just taken a bite of her food and was listening with wariness on where Olivia was trying to go with the topic.

The other female knight grinned mischievously and turned to Penelope. "So Penelope, why don't you tell me a bit about how Gavin was in bed. I don't recall you ever telling me anything about him."

The female knight nearly choked on her food. Whatever she had been expecting from Olivia, it surely hadn't been that. Penelope coughed as she tried to recover and shot a glare at Olivia, who merely shrugged in reply. She glanced across at Gavin, whos face was now red as well, and noticed him stiffen slightly.

"You have no shame." he growled annoyedly.

"What? I'm just curious. Aren't you?" Olivia twirled a strand of her hair innocently. "Crow may have won her heart but that doesn't mean he won her body as well."

"Olivia, we are not discussing this." Penelope growled.

"Well, I think that sounds a bit suspicious." Olivia snickered. "Perhaps Gavin's not as dull as I originally thought."

Gavin glared at Olivia. "Knock it off.. I was courting her properly for marriage, there's nothing more to discuss then that." he snorted. The male knight glanced towards Crow and shifted his gaze away from the group. "I certainly wasn't treating our courtship like some frivolous fling." he added in a quieter grumble.

[Rogue Sloth]

Crow dug into his food as Olivia tried to harass Penelope, deciding to stay out of the conversation, since he knew she would only be encouraged to keep prodding at them if he got involved too. He focused on the flavor of the stew instead, finding that he was impressed with Gavin’s ability to cook in spite of himself. The broth was expertly seasoned. Even though he and the other thieves occasionally dipped into the knights’ supply of spices to put on their own food, none of them had the skills to apply the seasonings this well. The rich taste filled his mouth, and he ate ravenously, filling his empty stomach with the large helping of stew.

For a while, he managed to ignore Olivia’s taunting, but she eventually caught his attention with a particular sultry question: “So, Penelope, why don’t you tell me a bit about how Gavin was in bed?”

The thief looked up from his bowl, catching both Penelope and Gavin’s uncomfortable expressions as he did, and turned towards Olivia with a warning look. It was the first time that the knight’s troublemaking had caught all three of them at once, and unfortunately, she seemed to have realized it as well. She refused to let the subject drop, even after Gavin and Penelope both tried to make her do so.

Crow averted his gaze again, finding the current topic of discussion just as distasteful as they did. He wasn’t concerned about comparing himself with Penelope’s ex suitor, but he certainly didn’t want to hear any details about their time together. However, as Gavin explained curtly that they’d had a formal courtship, he glanced over at the knight curiously. Even though he’d heard that noblemen and women often had businesslike relationships, he was a little surprised to hear that it sounded like they hadn’t slept together at all. Perhaps that was why the knight had been so uncomfortable when they had come back to the camp from their walk.

He was just about to tune out their conversation again, but Gavin added one last comment that made him bristle: “I certainly wasn’t treating our courtship like a frivolous fling.”

“I beg your pardon?” Crow growled, narrowing his eyes at the knight.

“I’m just saying, I treated her with the respect she deserves,” Gavin shrugged, meeting his gaze evenly.

“No, you’re saying you don’t think I’m treating her with respect,” the thief curled his lip.

“You certainly aren’t acting like it.”

Crow clenched his jaw, trying not to give in to the knight’s accusations. Normally, he didn’t care what noblemen thought of him, but he didn’t like being told that he was disrespecting the woman he loved. He didn’t see Penelope as just another ‘frivolous fling’—far from it, in fact. He cared more deeply about her than anyone else in his life. Even though he couldn’t court her the same way a noble could, he had every intention to ask her to marry him after the war ended. But, of course, he couldn’t say any of that to Gavin.

“You know what? Think whatever you want,” he muttered, turning away from the knight. He reached to take Penelope’s hand in his, seeking comfort in her touch. He still wanted to keep his promise to her about not fighting with Gavin, but it was hard to do when the man kept falsely accusing him all the time.

[BuzzingBee]

Penelope shot a glare at Gavin as he accused Crow. The knight felt a bit defensive of the accusations, especially since she didn't believe Gavin had any right to be the judge of how Crow was treating her. She shifted a bit besides Crow, feeling a bit tempted to counter the male knight's words. However, doing that would likely cause for an argument to drag on and with one glance at Crow, she decided it was best to merely let the conversation die rather than risk having Gavin continue to try and convince her that Crow was disrespecting her.

She let out a long exhale and pressed closer to the thief as he took her hand in his. She gently rubbed her thumb over his hand and relaxed a bit as a silence fell over. She finished her portion of the stew and set the bowl aside as she watched the fire. Though the silence wasn't tension free, she preferred it over arguing or Olivia attempting to stir more trouble. It didn't last for too long though as Olivia let out a small huff, quickly getting bored.

"Well, if that's all, I'm heading to bed." she sighed, slowly standing up and beginning to head over to where she had laid out her bedroll.

"We all should." Gavin mumbled, glancing up at the night sky before rising to his feet.

Penelope gave a small nod of agreement. With her stomach full and another long day of walking ahead of them, she figured it was best that they all get as much rest as they could before they had to leave in the morning. She stretched her back and then looked over at Crow with a small smile. "So, am I still sharing with you tonight?"

[Rogue Sloth]

Crow finished off the rest of his supper in silence, finding the last bit of stew more tasteless than the rest. Even though he had chosen not to defend himself against the knight, he couldn’t get Gavin’s words out of his head. He found it frustrating that Penelope’s former suitor thought he was treating his relationship with her like a fling. Though Gavin might not approve of it, most of the kingdom didn’t operate like the nobles in the inner cities. Formal courtship wasn’t practical for the people of the outer villages. Everyone courted to a degree, but they didn’t have traditions to fall back on like the knights, so they all made due with what they could.

He leaned into Penelope’s side, appreciative of her relaxing presence during the tense silence. Their situation was especially tricky, given their differing classes and their positions in the war. With so many barriers to overcome already, it wasn’t possible for them to have a normal courtship, even by peasant standards. It was a fact the thief had come to accept, and it annoyed him to know that Gavin was trying to use it to get between them. After all, just because Penelope was a noblewoman didn’t mean he had to court her in the same formal way that her ex suitor would have… right?

He closed his eyes and let out a long exhale, hating how the knight was getting in his head. There was still a part of him that felt like he wasn’t good enough to be with Penelope, that she would be better off with a man who could give her the life she deserved, and Gavin’s words hadn’t done anything to lessen that insecurity. While he didn’t believe he was disrespecting her in any way, he did wish he could do more to provide for her, or at least prevent her from losing everything else she cared about in order to be with him.

Lost in thought, Crow blinked a bit dazedly when Penelope addressed him. “Of course you are,” he offered her a half smile and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Pressing a soft kiss to her cheek, he rose to his feet and stretched tiredly, ready to sleep now that the rest of his energy was being spent on digesting his supper. He stepped over to his bag and grabbed his bedroll, unfurling it on a flat part of the ground for them to share.

Once the bed had been set up, he laid down and gestured for her to join him, wrapping his arms around her when she did. Glancing up one more time at the camp, he saw that Olivia had already passed out on her mat, while Gavin stood off to the side to keep the first watch. The knight was pointedly avoiding looking in their direction.

Crow pulled Penelope a bit closer to himself and touched a tender kiss to her lips. “I missed this,” he murmured, nestling his head against hers. With the knight by his side, he expected that he was going to sleep quite well that night.

[BuzzingBee]

Penelope smiled and got up after the thief. While he got the bedroll out, she went ahead and took off her armor and set it down to the side. Gavin would take the first watch so she wouldn't have to worry about wearing until after she got a bit of sleep. Free from the weight of her armor, she stretched out her arms and then moved to step over to Crow as he gestured for her to join him.

She laid down besides him and leaned in as he kissed her. "Me too." she mumbled softly. She rested her head against his and closed her eyes. Comfortable in his embrace, she didn't doubt that she'd be able to fall asleep rather easily. Penelope pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Goodnight, Crow. I love you." Letting out a content sigh, the knight began to drift off to sleep besides him.

--

"Penelope."

A quiet whisper and then a couple taps on her shoulder stirred the knight from a rather deep sleep. She slowly opened her eyes and turned her head to see Gavin standing over her. He had his gaze shifted away from her as he waited for her to get up, seeming uncomfortable by the sight of her sleeping besides the thief. "Time for my shift already?" she asked in a hushed voice as she carefully slipped out of Crow's arms, trying not to wake the thief.

"Yeah.. I figure Olivia should take the last shift." Gavin mumbled as he moved to step away from the two.

Penelope gave a small nod as she stood up and paused as she looked over at the male knight. What he had said to Crow earlier was still bugging her. In fact, all of his constant attempts to get between them were annoying her. She wanted to speak with him about it and with the other two still asleep, she supposed it was the best time to bring it up without having to worry about a fight or anymore trouble. "Gavin..." She began. She hesitated and glanced over her shoulder at Crow, checking to make sure the thief was asleep still. He seemed to be so she stepped over to the male knight and sighed. "What is it going to take for you to accept that I'm with Crow now?"

Gavin stiffened at her words and then turned to face her with a frown. "I know you are..." he mumbled after a moment's hesitation. His gaze flickered towards the thief before looking sternly at Penelope. "But he's the most wanted thief in Brerra and I'm pretty sure he's using you. I still think he's the one behind all of this." The male knight shook his head.

"You only think that because you want him to be. It'd make this whole situation easier for you if he was." Penelope argued crossing her arms over her chest.

"That's not true." Gavin insisted. He met her gaze concernedly and took a step closer to her. "Look, even if he's not, he's still not right for you. He'll never be able to give you a proper life. He's constantly on the run and stealing... If you really choose him, you're going to lose everything. Your status, your job, your family, your friends. Everything that you have right now will be gone the moment you leave with him."

She didn't like how strongly he was arguing with her. Especially as he mentioned all the things she would be leaving behind. She already knew it was going to be difficult to let go of the the world she knew when the time came so she didn't appreciate the firm reminder of it. Penelope opened her mouth to reply but Gavin held up a hand to silence her as he continued on.

"I know you said that you're willing to lose all of that but I don't think you'll be able to handle it... You're going to realize that this is all a mistake too late, when your reputation has already been ruined by him. I'm just trying to make you realize it before that happens... Right now, you can still go back." Gavin told her softly.

"Go back to you?" Penelope narrowed her gaze at him.

"Not necessarily.." Gavin mumbled lowering his gaze. "I just meant you can still keep everything.. You broke off our courtship and I will honor that. If you came back and still didn't want to be with me, I won't force you into that marriage, Penelope."

She let out a quiet exhale, hating that his words sounded genuine rather than a sly attempt to win her back. The knight supposed she could understand the concern he had for her if he was truly worried that she would come to regret her decision with time. Of course, it sounded like it was a mixture of that and his still left over feelings for her, so convincing him otherwise would likely be a bit impossible. For a moment, the knight considered explaining to him what had happened two years ago and why she had even left Crow in the first place, since it might give him a better understanding of her feelings as well as Crow's. However, she decided against it for now, believing it likely wouldn't have much of an effect on the other knight's opinion.

"Look, I appreciate the concern but you're not going to change my mind on this, Gavin." Penelope told him firmly. "I know what I'm giving up and as crazy as it sounds to you, it's what I want. Maybe one day you'll be able to understand that." She shook her head and walked off to take her position for guard duty, silently signaling that she was done with the conversation. She leaned back against a nearby tree, clearing her mind as she focused on the quiet forest around as her shift began.

[Rogue Sloth]

“I love you too, Penelope,” Crow sighed, closing his eyes. It had been so long since the last time he had fallen asleep with the knight in his arms. He had missed the feeling of her warm body pressed against his as he drifted off. Of course, they had been able to lay next to each other a number of times since their reunion, but he had longed to hold her through the night. Now that he finally had his wish, it didn’t take long for him to slip off into a content slumber.

--

Living a life where being out in the open was never safe, Crow wasn’t a deep sleeper by nature; and with the additional company of knights he didn’t know well or trust, he slept even lighter still. So, during the night, he was roused the instant Penelope moved in his arms. He heard her speaking with someone else in a hushed tone, recognizing the other voice to belong to Gavin. Making the connection that she was just getting up for her guard shift, and that there was no danger to worry about, he didn’t bother to open his eyes or get up. Instead, he shifted until he was lying comfortably on his side and exhaled quietly as he settled down to go back to sleep.

However, he didn’t make much progress before he heard Penelope speak again. Normally, he wouldn’t have bothered to eavesdrop on their conversation, but between his distrust of Gavin and his curiosity to find out what she wanted to talk to her ex suitor about in private, he couldn’t bring himself to drift off to sleep. So, interest piqued, he laid still and pretended to be unconscious as he listened to the two knights speak in the dark.

Right away, he was glad he had stayed up, because he heard Gavin tell Penelope that he believed she was being used. Crow gritted his teeth, feeling a pang of annoyance that the knight still didn’t trust him. He understood that it was any noble’s inclination not to trust a criminal, but he would have thought that Gavin would come around eventually between Penelope’s coaxing and his own willingness to help them find Jaxon. It took quite a bit of willpower for him not to get up and argue with the knight about it, but he managed to take a calming breath and keep still, continuing to focus on their conversation as he listened for Penelope’s reply.

Of course, she wasn’t persuaded by her former suitor’s obstinate distrust, and for that, he was relieved. However, what Gavin said next struck a little too close to home for the thief. He felt a stab of shame run through his heart like a knife as the knight repeated everything he already knew to be true of himself: If Penelope stayed with him, she would lose her whole life. He knew she had said she was willing to give it all up for him, and he had tried to convince himself that it was her decision and that he had nothing to feel guilty about, but her words had never once changed the way he felt. He was going to ruin her the instant they left to be together after the war. The thought that he was going to do such a thing to the woman he loved sent a wave of grief through him.

Gavin’s following words did nothing to lessen his pain. Crow listened dolefully as the knight told Penelope that he didn’t believe she would be able to handle giving everything up for him. It was what he had been afraid of as well, and now here was this man who had known her for much longer than he had, verifying his concerns. His heart sank as he imagined Penelope’s face, filled with hurt and betrayal, as she realized that she had made a mistake in running off with a thief.

I should never have approached her, he thought, biting the inside of his lip to keep himself from grimacing. It had been selfish of him to show up after two years had passed and steal her away yet again from her life as a knight. She’d had everything she could have wanted—her family, new friends, a high-ranking job, and even a suitor who could help her rise up to even better things. He should have never showed up in her camp and given her the option to sacrifice it all over again. If he had just let her go, she could have moved on, and he wouldn’t be ruining the life of the woman he loved more than anyone else.

She can still go back.

Gavin’s words echoed in his head. The thought of letting Penelope go made Crow’s stomach twist into a knot, but perhaps it was the best thing he could do for her. After all, the knight was right. At that moment, the only ones who knew about their forbidden relationship were Gavin, Olivia, Rikki, and Hazel. As long as word didn’t spread any farther, she could still go back to her life without him. She wouldn’t have to lose a thing.

He knew it was the right thing to do, but it was terribly hard to convince his heart. As much as the image of Penelope’s hurt face appeared in his mind, so did his dream of building a life with her in Farhill. He could picture it as vividly as the day: He would sell off his childhood house in Myrefall to buy a place by the lake, where they would live and raise a new family together. As long as he adhered to the people of Farhill’s rules about stealing, the villagers would provide them shelter, and they would be safe from the local knights. It would be a peaceful life, and it was one he wanted more than he had wanted anything else before.

But that life could never happen if Penelope regretted leaving to be with him.

Crow felt another stab of pain. He felt torn in two. Part of him wanted to just continue as things were and hope that the knight didn’t change her mind, but another part of him felt like it was selfish of him to let her affection for him cloud her judgment. It could be months or even years before her vision cleared and she realized what he could offer her was nothing close to what a nobleman like Gavin could. Was it really fair of him to take advantage of that?

Feeling conflicted and unable to decide what the best course of action was to take, it took a long time before the thief managed to drift off again, his slumber filled with confusing dreams of a future that was now more uncertain than ever before.

[BuzzingBee]

Her shift went by fairly quickly. The night was silent and it left her alone with her thoughts. She mainly reflected on Gavin's words and how to tackle the situation regarding the male knight. For a moment, she wondered if perhaps he was right that some day she would regret her decision to run off with Crow. It might be possible considering that she had no real idea of how she would handle peasant life. Maybe she would grow to miss her job and family far too much and that would cause for a longing for her old life.

Penelope glanced over towards Crow's sleeping form and smiled faintly to herself, quickly pushing such worries aside. She'd find a different job in the outer villages and as for her family, they would be safe once the war was over. Given some time, we'll probably have our own family anyways.. She closed her eyes for a moment as she thought about the life they had been talking about having after the war and felt her heart flutter excitedly. The knight felt certain that Gavin was wrong. Afterall, she had already experienced what life could be like without Crow for two years. While it hadn't been bad, she had never completely gotten over leaving him behind, which was evident to her after his return.

Time wore on and eventually she woke Olivia up for the last shift. With Olivia taking over, she returned to Crow's side. Penelope laid down quietly, pressing her back up against him as she closed her eyes and fell asleep once again.

---

The next morning, Penelope stirred as sunlight hit her eyes and she began to notice the sound of footsteps. She let out a small groan and slowly opened her eyes, glancing around the camp as she noticed Olivia waking up Gavin. She stretched out her legs before turning over to face Crow. She smiled, enjoying the moment of finally being able to wake up next to him after so long, then pressed a kiss to his cheek.

"Guess it's time to get up." she murmured.

[Rogue Sloth]

The next morning, Crow awoke feeling like he hadn’t slept at all. His mind had been wired all night with thoughts about how to handle the situation with Penelope, filling him with uncertainties that had kept him from sleeping as soundly as he had hoped. In addition to that, his body was stiff from the tension he had built up from his stress, and the ache in his back from the night before had gotten worse rather than better. Overall, it wasn’t the most pleasant experience first thing in the day.

He groaned tiredly as Penelope shifted against him and pressed a kiss to his cheek. The gesture would have normally been welcomed by the thief, but with his internal confliction that had yet to be solved, a leaden weight of fear and uncertainty replaced the joy he usually felt at her touch. However, he didn’t want her to know that he had eavesdropped on her conversation last night, so to cover his discomfort, he feigned a weary smile and squeezed her tightly in an embrace.

“Just a little longer,” he murmured, burying his head against her neck. While he was still exhausted from the terrible sleep he had gotten, he also didn’t feel ready to let her out of his arms quite yet. He had yet to make up his mind about whether or not he was going to let her go, but the fact that parting ways with the knight was even on the table again made him reluctant to even put physical space between them. His heart still wasn’t in a place to accept that he might lose her, so he wanted to savor every moment he was certain they had left.

Crow held her a little closer, focusing on every detail about her; her soft skin, her warmth, and even her smell. He felt a swell of affection for the knight, but the moment was disrupted as the image of her disappointed face flashed through his mind once again. As much as he didn’t want to let her go, the logical part of him knew that he was only making things harder on himself by holding her so tightly. If he was going to get to a place where he could let her go, he needed to put some distance between them.

Pulling back from his embrace, he forced himself to sit up—his back smarted at the motion, making him wince faintly—and glanced down at Penelope. “Alright, I’m ready now,” he said, stretching his limbs to rid himself of his lingering weariness.

[BuzzingBee]

Penelope smiled as he held her tightly. "Alright." she mumbled leaning her head against his. She felt him pull her closer and she pressed into him, enjoying the moment before they would have to get up and continue on their way to Aramoor. When he finally pulled back, she sat up as well and stretched as well before moving to stand up. "I'm guessing we won't have much time before we have to leave." she told him as she glanced up at the sky.

"Oh good, you're are already up." Gavin yawned as he stepped over. He glanced at Crow before focusing his gaze on Penelope. "There's still a bit of stew leftover from last night if you want some. We should get moving soon though... We already slept in a bit later than I would have liked." He shot an accusing glare at Olivia.

Olivia smirked and shrugged her shoulders. "You never specified how early you wanted to get up. This is early for me."

Gavin snorted and moved off to collect his bed. Penelope watched him go before looking back over at Crow. "You can have the stew if you want. I think I'm just going to grab an apple." she shrugged. The knight moved to collect her armor, tying it back on before moving to grab an apple from her bag. She looked around the camp, noticing the other two knights sitting down to enjoy a quick meal as well. She stepped over to join them sitting down near the now fireless pit as she began to eat her apple.

[Rogue Sloth]

Crow nodded when Penelope said they probably didn’t have much time before they had to leave for Aramoor. Based on where he guessed they were at the moment, he estimated that they would arrive around dusk if they traveled at the same pace as they had the day before. Considering how far south the village was, they were making good time in his opinion.

He rose to his feet with her as she stood up, moving slowly since his muscles were still stiff from the night. Already, the distance between them felt tangible, and he had to force himself not to reach for her hand or seek any other form of touch. It was difficult to do, since he always sought comfort in her when he was feeling distressed. However, he knew he was going to have to relearn to find that comfort elsewhere if he let her go. So, he kept his hands at his sides, fidgeting slightly with the hem of his tunic to occupy himself so he wouldn’t instinctively reach for the knight.

He turned at the sound of Gavin’s voice, tensing as he saw that the knight was walking over to them. With Gavin’s words still fresh in his mind, he found it difficult to meet the other man’s eyes, instead averting his gaze to look over the camp, as if their supplies were suddenly interesting to him. He hated how inferior he felt compared to Penelope’s former suitor. He considered his confidence to be one of his most unwavering qualities, but now, he couldn’t even bring himself to pretend like he was her best choice—not when he knew there was someone else who was much better suited for her than he could ever hope to be.

Crow turned back to Penelope as she offered to let him have the rest of the stew. He shifted his weight, not quite sure what to say. Normally, he would have jumped at the offer, but with his stomach twisted from his conflicting emotions, he wasn’t sure if he could keep the heavy stew down. However, he didn’t have time to come up with a reasonable excuse before she stepped over to join the others by the pit. Not wanting to draw attention to himself, he followed after her and took a seat by her side.

When he had settled down, the thief glanced at the pot of leftover supper. There was about one portion left, but with no appetite, it would be too much for him to finish alone. Casting Penelope a sidelong glance, he reached for two bowls and split the remaining food between them. “Here,” he said, offering one to her with a soft smile. “You should have some too. I had a lot to eat last night, so I don’t need this much.” He leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to her cheek, ignoring the discomfort that bubbled up inside of him when he did. “Besides, we might not have time to stop for lunch, so you should eat a little more before we go.”

[BuzzingBee]

Penelope looked over at Crow as he sat down besides her and split the stew into two bowls. She raised an eyebrow at him as he offered her the second bowl, surprised that he didn't just take the rest of the stew for himself. It wasn't like him to deny a full meal so she found it slightly strange that he insisted on sharing with her. "Oh.. Well alright." she said after a moment of hesitation. She took the bowl from him and quietly ate her breakfast besides him.

A little after she finished, Gavin moved to begin collecting his supplies. He eventually moved to collect the bowls and paused as his gaze met Penelope's. He frowned a little and she tensed a little, realizing that the male knight was likely still thinking about their conversation from the night before. "Penelope," he began, pausing as he glanced at Crow before lowering his voice to a whisper as he spoke to her. "please just think about it a little more."

Penelope blinked in surprise and leaned away from the male knight. He was getting rather bold to attempt talking to her about it in front of Crow. It wasn't a change that the female knight liked to say the least since she didn't want Crow to get involved. It was bad enough he still had to put up with Gavin occasionally accusing him. "I've thought about it enough." She responded sharply. Luckily that seemed to be enough for Gavin to not push any further on the subject.

He let out a soft sigh and straightened up to look around the camp. "Anyways, we should get ready to leave now." he muttered before moving to grab his bags.

Penelope watched him go before looking over at Crow. She pressed into the thief's side, feeling the need to be closer to him after being reminded of her talk with Gavin. "I might take back what I said yesterday. I think I do owe you a word of thanks." she mumbled to him.

[Rogue Sloth]

Despite his lack of appetite, Crow managed to finish off his half-filled bowl of stew. It hadn’t been much, but with the incessant churning in his stomach from his stress, he almost felt like he had overeaten. He set his bowl aside and leaned back on the palms of his hands, letting out his breath slowly as the food settled. He hoped the discomfort would pass quickly, otherwise the rest of the walk to Aramoor was going to be quite unpleasant.

At the sound of footsteps, he looked up to see that Gavin was approaching them again. Just like before, the knight’s presence made him stiffen slightly, and he looked away to keep from meeting his gaze. Unfortunately, he still caught Gavin’s glance towards him and saw him whisper something in Penelope’s ear from the corner of his eye. It wasn’t hard to take a few guesses about what the knight was saying to her. He shot the other man a cold look. Even though he wasn’t sure where he stood with her, he didn’t want her ex suitor to speak with her about something that he should discuss with her, himself. It wasn’t Gavin’s job to push them apart. If she was going to leave him, or if he was going to let her go, it needed to be decided between them, and no one else.

Fortunately, all it took was a few sharp words from Penelope for the knight to leave them alone. Crow was just about to relax again, but he didn’t have the chance before she suddenly leaned into his side. It took all of his strength not to flinch, but he couldn’t stop himself from tensing slightly. He silently cursed himself for slipping, and quickly moved to put an arm around her shoulders in the hopes that she hadn’t noticed his momentary stiffness.

Pressing her close to his side, he leaned his head against hers and sighed. “I suppose I could say I told you so,” he murmured. “But I think the evidence speaks for itself.” He glanced at Gavin as the knight packed up their camping supplies before going on in a quiet voice, “I don’t think he’s ever going to trust me. I just hope he doesn’t let his stubbornness get in the way of this mission. Jaxon is too dangerous to lose over a petty feud.”

[BuzzingBee]

Penelope glanced up at Crow, noticing that the thief had become tense when she first leaned into him. It had only been for a brief moment but she had still caught it before he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. The knight wondered if he was feeling alright. First the denial of a full meal and now the stiffness, it was being to cause her to question if something was wrong. However, the thought was soon pushed aside as he held her close and rested her head against hers. She sighed at his words and gave a small nod of agreement.

"I hope not either." she agreed then gave her shoulders a small shrug. "I'm hoping he'll trust you a little once we find this Jaxon.. At least then he'll have to see you didn't steal the supplies." After speaking with Gavin the night before, she doubted the male knight would ever come to actually trust Crow but she at least hoped that his suspicion and distrust of him would die down once they found the real threat.

The knight stayed close to him for a moment longer before finally pulling away to stand up. Gavin had pretty much finished packing and Olivia was already standing off to the side, waiting for the others with a bored expression. "Seems like they're about ready to go. We better grab our stuff." she mused as she offered her hand to him. Luckily they didn't have much to pack up aside from his bedroll. She had already put on her armor so all she needed to grab was her bag before they were ready to head out.

[Rogue Sloth]

Crow nodded when Penelope said Gavin would have to see that he wasn’t the one who had raided the knights’ camp. He hoped she was right. It was frustrating to have the knight constantly breathing down his neck over something he hadn’t done. He didn’t understand why Gavin was so convinced that it had been him in the first place. Sure, he was the most wanted thief in the kingdom, but it was because of the length of time that he’d been stealing and the high-ranking nobles whom he had chosen as his targets. Killing and plundering had never been on the list for him.

He let out his breath in a thoughtful sigh. Honestly, he was starting to think that, given enough time, Jaxon’s reputation would outgrow his own. The man was ruthless and clearly wasn’t afraid to kill during his raids. He was a much more dangerous thief than Crow ever was. Usually, murderous thieves were also more reckless, which was why they weren’t as successful as Crow had been. They would make more mistakes that usually led to their deaths. However, Jaxon was different. He was too calm to make the same errors that caused most criminals’ captures. It was what made him such a fearsome thief and deadly adversary.

Crow was drawn from his thoughts when he felt Penelope shift beside him, moving to get up. He took her extended hand to stand as well, stretching his sore back one more time before stepping over to put his bedroll away. Fortunately, since Gavin had taken care of most of their supplies, that was the only thing he had needed to put up.

Once they were all ready to go, Gavin took the lead again, and they began the last leg of their journey to Aramoor. Crow fell behind a bit as they walked, partly to keep his distance from Gavin, but also because he didn’t want the others to notice the difficulty he was having because of his soreness. His eyes swept cautiously over the trees around them, searching for signs of movement. If the knights’ barons were still sending patrols to the southern side of the outer villages, he didn’t want to be caught with his guard down, especially when he could tell that his reaction time would be slower than usual. So, he remained quiet as they trekked through the forest, keeping his attention on his surroundings rather than the knights he was traveling with.

[BuzzingBee]

Penelope followed behind the other two knights as they began their walk towards Aramoor. It wasn't long before the female knight noticed that Crow had fallen behind, which was a bit strange to her since she had grown rather used to traveling at his side. Something's wrong.. she realized as she looked back over her shoulder at him. She noticed that he seemed to move a bit stiffly, as if he was sore.

Though they had done quite a bit of walking from the day prior, she didn't think that alone was enough to leave him in the condition he was currently in. She frowned to herself, wondering what had happened. She was unsure if he was merely feeling unwell or if it was because of something else. Her gaze flickered towards Gavin. Perhaps it was because of what the male knight had said to him the night before? She didn't think that was enough to stress the thief out to such an extent but maybe he had let his words get to him a little too much.

Penelope sighed, still unsure. Deciding it was too much of a guessing game, the knight fell back besides Crow, slowing her pace so she was able to walk at his side. She slipped her hand into his and looked up at him with a concerned gaze. "Hey, are you alright?" She asked quietly, keeping her gaze focused on him. Knowing him, she didn't doubt he would try to hide whatever was bugging him, just like he had done with his illness before. So the knight watched him with a careful eye.

[Rogue Sloth]

Being focused on watching the surrounding forest, Crow didn’t notice Penelope fall back to his side until he felt her slip her hand into his. He blinked, coming back to himself a bit, and turned to meet her gaze as she asked him if he was alright. At first, he didn’t say anything. He wasn’t sure where to even start. Admitting that he had eavesdropped on her conversation with Gavin the night before wasn’t an option, because he didn’t want her to know he had done it. Besides that, he also didn’t want to tell her that he was feeling inadequate for her. He was starting to think that it was the best decision to let her go back to her life as a knight after all, but he wasn’t ready to do that yet. Just the thought of saying goodbye to her all over again was crushing to him. He needed more time to prepare before he could handle that conversation clearheadedly.

“I’m fine,” he said after a moment. “I just haven’t slept well for the past couple nights.” As if to prove his point, he reached up with his left hand and gripped his right shoulder, rolling the joint until it popped in response. Unfortunately, the motion wasn’t enough to loosen up the tightness he had built up from his stress. Letting out his breath in a sigh, he dropped his hand back down to his side and looked down at her again with a reassuring smile, “I’m a little sore, but I’ll be alright.”

Giving her hand a squeeze, he fell silent again and returned to looking for patrols in the forest. He hoped the explanation he had given her would be enough for her to let the subject drop. The last thing he wanted was to tell her the truth—that he knew he wasn’t good enough for her, and that she would be better off without him around to drag her down. So, he tried to indicate with his body language that he was done with the conversation by avoiding her searching eyes and keeping lookout to stay busy.

[BuzzingBee]

Penelope eyed him as he hesitated to reply. Already she found herself distrusting whatever would come out of his mouth, partially guessing that the reluctance to answer her was because he was trying to think of an excuse for his behavior. As he tried to chalk it up to poor sleep, the knight fell quiet for a moment. Perhaps it was just because of how he had acted with his illness, but she couldn't bring herself to trust his words as easily as she usually did. If something more was wrong other than just not being able to sleep well, she wanted to know.

However, she didn't push right away as she noticed him continue to avoid looking at her as he kept a lookout. The knight frowned a little and lowered her gaze for a moment, as she thought it over. Clearly the thief didn't want to talk further on the subject, regardless if he was telling the truth or not. It only made her more suspicious that something was off. Of course, she couldn't figure out what it was. He had seemed fine before they had gone to bed and it couldn't have been the stew since everyone else was fine. Maybe he really did let Gavin's words get to him too much.. she sighed softly.

Removing her hand from his, she crossed her arms over her chest and looked back up at him. "I don't buy that. You weren't nearly this bad yesterday and I doubt poor sleep would affect your appetite." she told him, looking at him concernedly. She glanced ahead towards the others before reaching out to rest a hand on his arm and lowering her voice. "Crow, it's something else isn't it? Why won't you tell me?"

[Rogue Sloth]

Crow faltered slightly when he felt Penelope slip her hand out of his. She hadn’t bought his excuse after all. He swallowed nervously, already expecting what was going to come next: She would question him about why he was really acting strangely until she managed to get him to spill the truth. He didn’t want to tell her though. Not yet—not before he had made peace with his decision on his own. If he told her that he wanted to let her go back to her life now and she protested, he didn’t think he had the strength to turn her down. He had to reach a point of acceptance first.

As expected, she told him right away that she didn’t buy his lie and rested her hand on his arm in a concerned gesture. This time, he couldn’t stop himself from involuntarily shying away from her touch. Lowering his gaze to the ground, he felt a stab of guilt for distancing himself from her so much. Even though he knew he had to do it if they were going to separate, the part of him that was hopelessly in love with the knight was pained by his own coldness towards her. He craved to gather her in his arms and forget about the problem altogether, to just move forward like he wasn’t going to ruin her by doing so. But that was the selfish thing to do, and he loved her too much to let that happen.

“I will admit that it’s something else,” he murmured without meeting her gaze. “But I still don’t want to talk about it yet. I’m sorry, love… I just can’t do it.” He let out his breath in a shaky sigh, loathing himself for keeping his thoughts from her. She had been nothing but honest with him, and he knew she deserved the same treatment, but he was too afraid that he would break down if he opened up to her about everything now. He needed to wait until he was more resolved in his decision.

Suddenly, Crow stiffened as he felt a sharp pressure in his chest and stopped walking, quickly bringing a hand to his mouth as a short coughing fit wracked his body. In general, the episodes brought on by his illness had decreased steadily, but they had yet to fully disappear. And now that he was away from Hazel, he didn’t have any way to get to the medicine that suppressed the little that remained.

“Damn it,” he muttered, spitting blood on the ground when the brief fit had passed.

[BuzzingBee]

Penelope blinked as the thief shyed away from her touch. It seemed she had been right in assuming his words were a lie and even worse it nearly seemed to the knight that he was trying to put some distance between them still. As he admitted that it was something else, the knight frowned at how heavy his words sounded. Her stomach churned with worry. Now that she knew something else was wrong, she wasn't quite sure she was willing to simply ignore it because he didn't want to talk about it yet, especially since it seemed rather serious.

In the next moment, the thief suddenly erupted into a coughing fit and her eyes widened with alarm. Ever since Hazel had found the cure for the illness, she hadn't seen any sign of it in Crow during their meetings. She recalled that Hazel said he might not ever be fully cured so perhaps it was just that, but after hearing the heaviness in his words, she couldn't help but fear that perhaps his illness was coming back again. Her heart pounded fearfully at the thought and she glanced ahead, noticing that Gavin was glancing over his shoulder at them questioningly.

Penelope pursed her lips together and pulled Crow to a stop with her before waving dismissively to the male knight. If Crow was still sick, she was certain he didn't want the other two knights finding out. Especially Gavin. "We'll catch up in a moment. Just need a water break."

"We need to keep moving, we just barely left camp." Gavin responded with a frown, clearly not noticing the blood on the ground due to the distance.

"Well you can keep moving. We'll catch up eventually so don't worry about it." Penelope stated firmly. She held Gavin's gaze until he let out a reluctant sigh and nodded his head.

"Just don't fall too far behind.." he mumbled, before looking back ahead and walking on. Olivia paused, seeming tempted to try and stay with Penelope and Crow but one stern expression from the female knight made her decide against it and trail after Gavin.

With the other two leaving them, Penelope turned to Crow with a worried look. "Crow, what's going on?" she asked him with a hint of sternness still in her voice. She took a step closer to him, trying to meet his gaze as she looked up at him. "Please... If it's something serious, tell me.. Maybe I can help you. Whatever it is, you don't have to handle it alone."