So...

[Gendarme]

My dog jumped up and ate my burger. I thought of taking it back, but remembered how determined this dog can be to get food at every opportunity. I feed this dog plenty, but when I least expect it he'll snatch the food from my hand, or lick something from the ground. Eggs, bacon, sausage, burgers, cheese, you name it. Nothing is safe from this dog. Halp.

[KuroTenshi]

Your first mistake was letting your guard down

Never. Let your guard down

[idlehands]

My cat is like that with headphone cords. I've gone through at least 10.

[KuroTenshi]

My cat is like that with headphone cords. I've gone through at least 10.

@idlehands

Does your cat eat them? Or just chew on them?

[Larfleeze]

Just eat your dog.

[idlehands]

<Snipped quote by idlehands>

Does your cat eat them? Or just chew on them?

@KuroTenshi

He just chews through it. I can't turn my back for 30 seconds without him nosing around.

[KuroTenshi]

Just eat your dog.

@Larfleeze

Must...resist...JOKE OPENING!

<Snipped quote by KuroTenshi>

He just chews through it. I can't turn my back for 30 seconds without him nosing around.

@idlehands

Weird >>

[Larfleeze]

<Snipped quote by Larfleeze>

Must...resist...JOKE OPENING!

@KuroTenshi

[KuroTenshi]

Shut up Lex Luther!

[Larfleeze]

Shut up Lex Luther!

@KuroTenshi

[Keyguyperson]

Your problem is called "Having a Dog". In order to stop having this problem, and thus losing all of your food, you should murder your dog.

[Smink]

My dog jumped up and ate my burger. I thought of taking it back, but remembered how determined this dog can be to get food at every opportunity. I feed this dog plenty, but when I least expect it he'll snatch the food from my hand, or lick something from the ground. Eggs, bacon, sausage, burgers, cheese, you name it. Nothing is safe from this dog. Halp.

@Gendarme

[Antarctic Termite]

Buy a cheap-ass food-shaped plastic toy. Rub it in real food to improve the scent. Cut a hole in it and fill it with pebbles or something. Pretend to eat it in front of the dog. See what happens and post about it here. i have no idea how dogs work i'm a cat guy

[KnightShade]

Just eat your dog.

@Larfleeze

Or anaesthetise it and start eating its tail in front of it, preferably in a bun with mustard. Pretend to let your guard down so the dog swoops in, snatches its tail and begins eating its way up itself.

[Smink]

Buy a cheap-ass food-shaped plastic toy. Rub it in real food to improve the scent. Cut a hole in it and fill it with pebbles or something. Pretend to eat it in front of the dog. See what happens and post about it here. i have no idea how dogs work i'm a cat guy

@Antarctic Termite

The dog will just think his master gone crazy and will probably avoid doing a lot of things with him in the future.

[Gendarme]

I'm too poor* to try some of these solutions.

*cheap