ArkmageddonCat

Get Kid

It took a good moment for reality to catch up with Harambe, God of Getting Kid, Prophet of Blue and the Ways of Harembae. His huge-ass reality distorting rip wasn't letting up just yet, and as he turned around to see Jefferson's massive AMERICAN FLAG grow closer, the skyscraper-sized gorilla god's eyes went wide in surprise.

Then he squeezed harder.

Suddenly, Harambe's magnificent feet were no longer in holy contact with the ground. Suddenly, cloud upon cloud of putrid smoke poured out of Harambe's holy ass. It was as if he himself - Harambe, Gotten Go-Getter God of Gottening Unbegottenly Gotten Kids, Gotten Prophet of Ungettingful Go-Gottening Getter B l u e and the Unbegotteningly Unbegotten Way of Harembae - was now a rocket, blasting off back to that point in space from which he had found zen and peace and hospitality and shelter and kindness and rest and relaxation.

He rose higher and higher as his hot, steaming, cleansing poo-gas continued to pour from his holy rear. The earth shook, the hospital shook, the sky shook, the moon shook, the ocean quaked, the stars shook, the man down the street in the cafe taking a shit shook, Harambe's holy leathery cheeks quivered rapidly, and Harambe, eaberaH fo yaW eht dna eulB fo tehporP, diK gnitteG fo doG, himself shook.

The skyscraper-sized gorilla god ascended up out of Jefferson's evil clutches, holding his fist proudly up into the air in the direction he was now flying, as if he was Superman or some shit. Like, this was like...legiterally, like, a scene in like...like The Iron Giant. Like, have you ever, like, seen that? It's like, totally and like, legiterally a good movie. Like, you should like...totally watch it...like...legiterally.

Oh, what was that? Harambe who?

OH SHIT I WAS TELLING A STORY! RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!

Well anyways, Harambe - Good if Gluten Cods, Puppet is Born of Wash in Refridgerator - flew up into the upper atmosphere, where his holy fart juices found themselves depleted, and he himself and him began to contemplate life itself. He floated there in the upper atmosphere, debating one of the great mysteries of the universe as stated by William Shakespeare. "To get kid, or not to get kid. That is The Question." Although it was pretty clear which was truly the answer...you know...cause it's a fucking roleplay?

...What? That's not Shakespeare? Fuck you.

Get Kid

Is anybody else gonna post IC?

I may be awhile.

Get Kid

@AdobeFlash Hell 2

Get Kid

@Chaotic Chao

Get Kid

@AdobeFlash

Get Kid

Harambe didn't expect anything less from the legendary Thomas Jefferson, and that, coupled with the 3rd president's awe-inspiring battle cry, told Harambe, God of Getting Kid, Prophet of Blue and the way of Harembae, everything he needed to know.

The giant gorilla regretted this course of action, for the sake of all those surrounding him who were not Jefferson, but the has-been president threatened his godly well being. Well...about as much as a measly ant could threaten an elephant, at least.

It was then that the mighty Harambe, Gotten Gorilla God of Getting Kid, Prophet of the Ungotten Go-Getter B l u e and the Way of Harembe, turned his back to Jefferson to bring only his mightiest weapon to bear.

His holy ass.

The skyscraper sized gorilla god indeed did bring his slightly wrinkled and leathery buttocks around to face his opponent, legendary 3rd president Thomas Jefferson. In only a moment, Harambe scrunched his eyes closed and forced out the largest fart that the universe had ever seen. The hospital began to warp as the walls became windows, and the ceiling became the floor. The sheer force of Harambe's glorious, godly wind was enough to shake tears from even the toughest of war veterans. And don't even get me started on the smell.

Thing was, Harambe - Gotten God of Getting the Gottenmost Gotten Kid, Begotten Prophet of Unbegottening B l u e and the Getting Way of Harembae - just really needed to let that one out before he could work on getting kid. Jefferson just so happened to be the perfect reason to let it loose.

- From Harambe, with love. <3

Ban the Person above you

Banned for not getting kid.

Get Kid

@Cynder, @Altered Tundra, @Grey

Harambe, God of Getting Kid, Prophet of B l u e and the Way of Harembae, turned to look at a fully empowered McLovin in Ronald McDonald form. He could see the virtue of this gloriously grand American hero, he could see endless seas of potential kid-getting flowing through this less-than-gotten man-child. Harambe saw great promise in this Clown of Red and Yellow, even so far as to consider him a counter-part to he, the God of Getting Kid, Prophet of Blue and the way of Harembae himself. This less-than-gotten man-child, the Clown of Red and Yellow, was of the colors red and yellow; reminding the gentle skyscraper sized gorilla god of Blue's sibling Primordial Colors. For this, Harambe's eyes glinted with hope, as if saying "Noble Warrior of Kid and Abolitionist of Belted Bellies, you have my respect. You alone have an extraordinary potential to get kid, many kid indeed. The packaging of soul-healthy, belly-freeing foods with toys to be gotten that smile with the ungotten smiles of less-than-gotten children give me - Harambe, God of Getting Kid, Prophet of B l u e and the Way of Harembae - hope. You have gotten a mantle of ungotten responsibility so great that all of kid-kind - gotten, ungotten, begotten, less-than-gotten, those upon the gotten or ungotten edges of getting, those beyond getting gotten, and otherwise - can look to you in the times of their getting gottening with eyes of pure, raw, unrefined, wild, sparkling, glistening, pulsating hope. You are a staple of the struggles to get kid here on the planet of Earth, but you are still young and weak as you are now. You have the potential, but it has yet to manifest itself in its true kid getting form. I can show you the Way of Harembae, the path that is the path to begin the getting of all gotten and ungotten kid-kin; but...only if you heed my words of unbegottening wisdom".

And thus the skyscraper-sized Harambe, God of Getting Kid, Prophet of Blue and the Way of Harembae, spoke majestically all with a single glinting of his eyes. The meaning was there, inescapable within the depths of his woebegone stare.

Then the towering gorilla god turned to Donald Trump, the Man of Walls and esteemed Presidential Candidate. This man had ambition in his heart, but sadly...he was sorely and unmistakably misguided. Harambe, God of Getting Kid, Prophet of B l u e and the Way of Harembae shook his head in such honest disappointment that the very hospital room itself appeared to shake with him in a prominent display of utter dismay. It was as if the skyscraper-sized gorilla god was trying to say "Trump, you have a heart of great and powerful ambitions, you are a strong man and a stronger wall builder. But you lack the delicate handling required to truly get kid, you are too stubborn and short-sighted to realize that you need my help. Me, Harambe, God of Getting Kid, Prophet of Blue and the Way of Harembae. I have gotten kid, yet I sense that you perceive even me as a threat. I sacrificed myself to get kid in the name of getting kid, and it was primarily the American people -your people - who ungot me into getting the god-hood that I got. Unknowingly, they showed a virtue that you, Trump, fail to reflect. For that, I am deeply saddened, but your erroneous ways can be corrected by my teachings, if you would dare to follow the path to follow the way of Harembae."

Then, turning to the last individual worth addressing, the skyscraper-sized illuminated illuminati Gorilla moon god laid his eyes upon the one and only Thomas Jefferson.

The maniac. The psychopath!

Harambe, The Gotten God of Getting Kids, Gotten Prophet of The Ungettable B l u e and The Way of Harembae would've lost his shit even at the mere mention of Thomas Jefferson, much less the sight. The formerly gentle, giant gorilla god started to pound at his chest furiously, speaking paragraph upon paragraph of raw, unfiltered, heart-wrenching emotional strife with each strike of leathery fist upon leathery breast.

"You are the sapient simpleton that beat down two of my most prime mates with a single fist while holding America's Declaration of Independence!"

They came home in banana bags because of you!"

Get Kid

The Advent of the Transcendent
--
Shifting Blue; Harambe Too
Get Kid's God; Blue's Conceptual Lawd

---

Collab With @yoshua171

---

Within the infinite Cosmic Existence there existed a color, and within that singular color all other colors did not exist, for it was only B l u e and Blue could not be anything else except B l u e.

However, Blue was not alone, for no, another being suffused of Blue, though not truly B l u e at its core--though its essence did possess B l u e--existed within its vicinity. "Harambe," the colorful voice of Blue stated with calmness and watery elegance, calling out to the prophet being that was the great Harambe.

"I believe it is time that our resplendence shifts through the ether and out of the oether into Universia. I exist within it, for it may not have existed without me, but I believe the people need us. The Gotten Child has expanded."

Harambe turned to his conceptual friend, he gave but a simple nod to say "Yes, let us proceed. We must teach the people the truth about getting kids that must be got". With a smirk Harambe opened his arms wide, becoming bathed in bright blue light mottled with the visages of eyes of gotten children everywhere. He then gave a determined nod to Blue, as if to say "My body is ready to get some kid", signaling that he was ready to get some kid.

Blue would have smiled, but he was a color, so instead he merelyB l u e s, and in that moment existence winked out for everyone, so swiftly that no one 'cept the highest of beings (and stoners) would realize it had occurred at all.

In that moment, a man walking across the street, who possessed a fantastic mustache, well styled hair, and a suit became aware of an odd sensation. The sky bent inwards and outwards and twisted around itself before his tie, which was blue, slithered from around his neck, merged with the sky and then a loud shockwave that sounded like two names, two concepts, two divine entities popping into existence , spread throughout the city.

The B l u e tie twisted into itself and expanded outwards a portal of B l u e forming to deposit the Divine Harambe onto the world and into the realm of Universia. As Harambe's form exited the portal in all of its getted glory, the portal became a tie, and the tie became the skies, and the skies became all of existence and existence was briefly B l u e, and then Blue was there and there was B l u e, standing next to Harambe.

Or was it sitting? Floating maybe?

Was it flying? Hovering? Perhaps it was swimming.

It was hard to say for looking upon the form of Blue was as looking at the purest representation of the concept and color B l u e.

"We have become. We are here. We are B l u e. I am the Blue. There is no other." He looked to his friend, "Shall we enlighten the Warriors of Kid? Shall we bring them together my friend?"

Harambe, God of Getting Kid, Prophet of B l u e and the ways of Harembae(The art of getting gotten kids from kid getting kids), turned to the bluest Blue and nodded dutifully to say "Yes, we shall, let us enlighten the Warriors of Kid and teach them the ways of getting kid in the highest forms. I can smell their cause is noble, but they are misguided in the truest art of kid getting. We shall teach them how to better their kid getting ways for the betterment of Universia, rather than simply their inane concepts of their individual world and their feeble human race".

The God Harambe, Prophet of Blue and the ways of Harembae, spoke swiftly with only a single nod of his godly head. His masterful skill of communication was a force of great emotion, a force of emotion so raw and yet refined that even the very concepts of sound and light could understand entire novels of speech from the saddened eyes of Harambe himself. Even the concepts of sound and light knew in their very conceptualized selves, Harambe's original quest to attain kid. They knew of Harambe's sacrifice in the name of getting kid, they knew of his transcendance into godhood, they knew of his creationing the ways of Harembae; the truest art of getting kid.

As he looked into the primate's glistening emotion filled eyes, Blue, as he always did, found meaning that few other beings could. He nodded his being--if not his head (does he have a head?)-- and trailed his B l u e (finger?) through the air. As Blue did so another portal opened. Blue gestured to Harambe and then the portal. "Go my Prophet, my friend. For I am already there...everywhere.
...
...
...
...
B l u e."

Harambe nodded gracefully as if to say "I shall see you there, my good friend", and with a swift dab he gloriously slid his way into the radiant B l u e portal of Blue.

Get Kid

What the fuck is this?

This is legit cancer.

I'm interested.

How do I sign up?

What the fuck am I supposed to do IC?

@ClocktowerEchos

It is our duty to get kid. We must get kid from the gotten kid getters, and save the entirety of the gotten kid-kin.