Alright, Im'ma gonna make my post then. Since RedVII is out of the game, I'll be potentially looking for one more person to sign up as attendant in the future.
Until then, it's just going to be you 3.
Until then, it's just going to be you 3.
Bork Lazer Member
Struggle On
STATUS: Auld Lang Syne, everybody. roleplayerguild.com/topics/… 2 yrs ago
- Last Seen: 12 days ago
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Recent Statuses
2 yrs ago
Current
Auld Lang Syne, everybody. roleplayerguild.com/topics/…
3 yrs ago
Vote in my new quest, Mirage, a RP quest set in the far, far future roleplayerguild.com/topics/…
3 yrs ago
Kink-Shaming. Kink-Shaming Never Changes.
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4 yrs ago
roleplayerguild.com/posts/5… Vote for Dead in Depression. The mechanics of the quest have now been posted!
4 yrs ago
Voting is open until the end of the week! Please come and vote! - roleplayerguild.com/topics/…
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Bio
ROLEPLAY BUCKET LIST
- Walmart Apocalypse Roleplay
- Nightmare Gas Station
- Underrail/Fallout/Post Apocalyptic Roleplay. Codename: Clausterclysm
- Anthromorphic Grimdark Animal Fantasy Roleplay. Codename: Fallowbrook.
- Eldritch Abomination Garfield Roleplay. Codename: Lasagna.
- Infinite IKEA Roleplay. Codename: God Morgon
- Roleplayerguild High School RP. Codename: Highschool Roleplay
- Cyberpunk South East Asia RP. Codename: Straits of Malacca. [CURRENTLY HAPPENING]
- Nightmare Gas Station
- Underrail/Fallout/Post Apocalyptic Roleplay. Codename: Clausterclysm
- Anthromorphic Grimdark Animal Fantasy Roleplay. Codename: Fallowbrook.
- Eldritch Abomination Garfield Roleplay. Codename: Lasagna.
- Infinite IKEA Roleplay. Codename: God Morgon
- Roleplayerguild High School RP. Codename: Highschool Roleplay
- Cyberpunk South East Asia RP. Codename: Straits of Malacca. [CURRENTLY HAPPENING]
CURRENT PROJECTS
- FRAYED TAPESTRY - AN EPIC FANTASY RP (WIP)
- THE LAST DEPRESSION - A RED MARKETS QUEST/PLAY BY POST RP (UNDECIDED)
Most Recent Posts
Whatever conversation was occurring around him, Lak Lok couldn’t care less, concerning himself with the conversation his tongue was having with the loathsome meal he was eating. The rocky taste of shroom salt and lichen sugar was palpable on the caramelized crust. The chef who cooked this had to be a goblin. In his experience, all goblins were fungivores by nature. By the time he’d swallowed down the last of the gamey hydra fat, he’d only caught the tail end of the conversation.
Interesting. It was convenient that they had an experienced outdoorsman as part of their party. Images of hacking away at a dead unicorn corpse wandered into his mind before he brushed it away, trying to focus on the task at hand. He had two choices now. Either, he could accompany the corpse-conjurer or go along with everyone else to the sheriff.
If he chose to investigate the sheriff’s office, he would no doubt be at risk of arrest for some of his…past misadventures. The thought of accompanying the black magician was much more appealing. Corpse conjuration was a magic that had many applications. Especially for cooking. The thought of violating the laws of nature to bring back once extinct flavors made Lak Lok’s mouth salivate.
Besides, it would reduce his future restaurant’s expenditure on acquiring rare ingredients. This….corpse interrogation was a learning experience he couldn’t miss out on.
“ Very well. I volunteer to accompany the corpse conjurer” Lak Lok wiped the oil off his scaly lips with the napkin and shuffled closer to the group, nearly tipping off the precariously long-legged stool. “ It will indeed be interesting to see -”
“ Sir?”
Lak Lok grumbled as he slowly turned to his back. It was that same damned waiter, holding a piece of paper in his trembling hands. It appeared he wouldn’t take no for an answer. Perhaps, there was something admirable behind all that incompetence after all.
“ Sir, are you going to…..” The half-elf visibly gulped, lifting up the paper for him to see, a price scribbled on it with coal “....Pay for your meal?”
Did that waiter seriously just -? The kobold stayed eerily silent, just staying still, an unreadable stony look on his face. He then replied in a deathly low murmur.
“ You’ll pay.”
The half-elf opened his mouth to say something but Lak Lok silenced him by slowly pulling out his chef’s knife. With a whimper, the half-elf slowly began to pull one coin and the next out of his pockets. Whenever there was a slight hesitation, Lak Lok gestured towards the pommel of his knife. When the last coin fell, Lak Lok pursed through the pile of coins before shaking his head and tutting in mock disappointment.
“ You’re missing ten sliver.” The bill now in his hand, Lak Lok waved it towards the waiter. “ Pay. Up.”
“Bu- buh, this is for my rent…..”
Lak Lok didn’t care. He just pointedly looked towards the pile of coins on the bartop and then, looked expectantly at the waiter. Half-blubbering, the waiter reluctantly deposited the last of his measly salary on top of the bar-stool.
“ Thank you for your service.”
Oh great, he was now crying. Lak Lok waited politely until the waiter was out of earshot, resuming what he was saying.
“ I’m so sorry for that terrible waiter. As I was saying previously, it will be interesting to see such magic for the first time.” Lak Lok waved his hand towards another waiter for a refill of his spring water before speaking to the entire group as a whole. “ I suppose if that’s all settled, then, I’m ready to begin this task. The food here has already worn my patience thin.”
Interesting. It was convenient that they had an experienced outdoorsman as part of their party. Images of hacking away at a dead unicorn corpse wandered into his mind before he brushed it away, trying to focus on the task at hand. He had two choices now. Either, he could accompany the corpse-conjurer or go along with everyone else to the sheriff.
If he chose to investigate the sheriff’s office, he would no doubt be at risk of arrest for some of his…past misadventures. The thought of accompanying the black magician was much more appealing. Corpse conjuration was a magic that had many applications. Especially for cooking. The thought of violating the laws of nature to bring back once extinct flavors made Lak Lok’s mouth salivate.
Besides, it would reduce his future restaurant’s expenditure on acquiring rare ingredients. This….corpse interrogation was a learning experience he couldn’t miss out on.
“ Very well. I volunteer to accompany the corpse conjurer” Lak Lok wiped the oil off his scaly lips with the napkin and shuffled closer to the group, nearly tipping off the precariously long-legged stool. “ It will indeed be interesting to see -”
“ Sir?”
Lak Lok grumbled as he slowly turned to his back. It was that same damned waiter, holding a piece of paper in his trembling hands. It appeared he wouldn’t take no for an answer. Perhaps, there was something admirable behind all that incompetence after all.
“ Sir, are you going to…..” The half-elf visibly gulped, lifting up the paper for him to see, a price scribbled on it with coal “....Pay for your meal?”
Did that waiter seriously just -? The kobold stayed eerily silent, just staying still, an unreadable stony look on his face. He then replied in a deathly low murmur.
“ You’ll pay.”
The half-elf opened his mouth to say something but Lak Lok silenced him by slowly pulling out his chef’s knife. With a whimper, the half-elf slowly began to pull one coin and the next out of his pockets. Whenever there was a slight hesitation, Lak Lok gestured towards the pommel of his knife. When the last coin fell, Lak Lok pursed through the pile of coins before shaking his head and tutting in mock disappointment.
“ You’re missing ten sliver.” The bill now in his hand, Lak Lok waved it towards the waiter. “ Pay. Up.”
“Bu- buh, this is for my rent…..”
Lak Lok didn’t care. He just pointedly looked towards the pile of coins on the bartop and then, looked expectantly at the waiter. Half-blubbering, the waiter reluctantly deposited the last of his measly salary on top of the bar-stool.
“ Thank you for your service.”
Oh great, he was now crying. Lak Lok waited politely until the waiter was out of earshot, resuming what he was saying.
“ I’m so sorry for that terrible waiter. As I was saying previously, it will be interesting to see such magic for the first time.” Lak Lok waved his hand towards another waiter for a refill of his spring water before speaking to the entire group as a whole. “ I suppose if that’s all settled, then, I’m ready to begin this task. The food here has already worn my patience thin.”
I am sorry, I am out. Hate, hate to do it, but Life takes no prisoners. Thanks for your understanding and best of luck!
Perhaps, I should have added more employee benefits as an incentive.....
Anyway, I have to go find another victim employee for this position. Have fun.
Be right back. Gonna formulate a character concept based on sockpuppet magic.
I would like to have my name changed to "Bork Lazer", if possible.
Guys, please post more. It's not like I need your posts as metaphysical fuel for my thaumaturgic ritual to summon my great and terrible master into the material world.
In
𝔽𝕦𝕥𝕚𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕪: 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔾𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕥 𝔾𝕒𝕞𝕖 - Cyberpunk Political Intrigue Roleplay
→
5 yrs ago
Forum: Advanced Roleplay
Keah wasn’t surprised or angry at the sudden turn of events. Just resigned to the realities of the Reclaim Zone. Betrayal had become a chore like any other in this world and acting like this was different was foolish. In a mere instant, the warehouse had become a thunderstorm of burnt propellant and lead, spent shells clattering against the floor like raindrops. He was frozen, affixed, unsure of what to do now. Petrukov was the one who came up with the plans. He was great at following plans. Not so good at making them up on the fly. He needed more time to think.
The tungsten-jacketed hollow-point bullet sailing towards his head at Mach 1 wasn’t patient enough for him.
For Keah, it was like intimately kissing a Tokyo auto-shinkansen with his forehead. His neck cracked, his head snapped back, every molecule in his body was a part of the brain-jostling experience. His hand reflexively grasped the front of his helmet whilst he stumbled back like a moon-walking drunkard. Managing to find cover beneath the drinks table, he breathed in and out. With a sense of wonder, he slid his finger where the bullet had left its mark, a wicked ravine of melted, rent poly-steel that tapered off towards the back.
He had to give credit to Engitech. Sure, their chrome wasn’t flowery but it was functional. However, he wasn’t that keen on stress-testing their product again with a second bullet or more.
Well, it was just a good thing he planned for an alternative route in mind. Lifting two fingers to the side of his helmet, Keah whispered three words.
“ On your marks….”
>://RECEIVING COMMAND
>://PROCESSING COMMAND……..
>://SPEED REQUIRED.
>://ACTIVATING COMBUSTION ENGINES
>://ROTATING DRIVE TRAIN
>://SHIFTING GEAR
>://SPEED ACQUIRED
You hear it. Everyone in the warehouse heard it above the bullet-fire. Underneath his helmet, Keah grinned,eyes focused on one blinking dot in his helmet GPS that was coming towards him.
It was a primal sound, a prehistoric roar that slowly grew in intensity and volume, from a mere buzz in your ears to a head-splitting din of grinding gears and screeching rubber. 3 tons of boron-carbon alloy with the soul of 500 horsepower torque came swerving into the complex, bullets bouncing off the Jury Rigg’s frame as its wheels turned towards its master. Sliding in a pendulum drift towards him, Keah jumped in through the open window, face planting against the wheel.One hand on the wheel, he turned it to the right and pumped down on the brakes, taking control of his mechanical monster and zooming past the enraged gun-men, all of whom were firing at him.
He came to a stop in front of both Johnny who was holding Serena, the backdoors automatically opening for them to enter.
“ You can get in or get out." He glanced waitingly towards the both of them and then, nodded towards the Lords of War shooting towards them both. "Your choice.”
Goddammit, now I have to choose between this and Futility.
NIGHT SHIFT KICKSTARTER GOALS
10 Posts - 100 Bork Dollars.
50 Posts - 200 Bork Dollars and a Gas-Way T-Shirt.
100 Posts - Gum I found stuck to the sidewalk.
250 Posts - Access to my RPGO account.
500 Posts - Night Shift Persistent World
1000 Posts - You get to be a special guest on TLC's ' Cooking with the Bork'
Googleplex Posts - Night Shift LARP where you get haunted by vicious monstrosities of the Night in real life.
10 Posts - 100 Bork Dollars.
50 Posts - 200 Bork Dollars and a Gas-Way T-Shirt.
100 Posts - Gum I found stuck to the sidewalk.
250 Posts - Access to my RPGO account.
500 Posts - Night Shift Persistent World
1000 Posts - You get to be a special guest on TLC's ' Cooking with the Bork'
Googleplex Posts - Night Shift LARP where you get haunted by vicious monstrosities of the Night in real life.
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