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    1. conman2163 6 yrs ago

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wrong place, whoops
I made a few edits, his hometown was changed to kaas city, his substance abuse was changed slightly in his psych eval and in his flaws, and the questions about his painting were answered in the personal interests section.

Glad to hear it is coming along well, I hope it can be done soon so I can get started.
all fixed I think! Thanks for the the spot on the BBcode
All issues that were brought up were fixed, aside from the particular issue I am having with the hider tags. Unfortunately it seems that my hider tags don't want to cooperate. I've got all the tags in their right place buuuuuuut it's still being problematic.
Roger, all issues addressed and fixed, save for the last. The grammatical and sentence structure errors were fixed, and I lightened the description of his sword. I will expand upon the squabble with his officer through RP.




Kadroo "Bearnubus" Long-Lake




The Noreaster | Turbolift

The winding down had certainly been welcome, with no more fire spears flying about, and the child-spirit returning to a more stable state, fear no longer rolling off her in waves. Now the situation he was in at this exact moment was not one he was pleased with. Clearly the child spirit had no concept of either dignity, or reverance for the followers of the great tree spirits, and certainly one of his stature. He had always been taught that to be a shaman of the Long-lake tribe was the one closest to the spirits, but his whole experience so far was making him wonder if that really was the case. None more then being picked up by the child-spirit, again just like the leaf dolls that were made for the wokling of the Long-Lake tribe, and being carried by it through the halls, following a spirit who walked like the elders of the Long Lake tribe. It occurred to Kadroo that perhaps he should try and name some of the spirits, particularly the child spirit, so that he may have a way of making the situation less... well what it was. That and, afterall, he was empowered as a shaman to perform such acts. Spirit Acolytes who had been named in the past by other shamans had often seemed to enjoy the new titles, so he figured he might have a go of it. As he was carried through the hall he closed his eyes and hummed a bit, which might have sounded a bit like the purring of a cat, a practice he commonly took up when he thought. It most certainly was something that called for thought too, one did not lightly name a spirit, they carried on forever, and giving them a childish name would seek only to shame them. It was in the middle of this thinking that Kadroo felt the child-spirit go rigid. A sort of tingling feeling shot through him and his nose twitched as he tried to shake off the feeling. For a moment, it was almost as if something else was carrying him other then the child spirit. Then the child spirit set off chattering in the language that they seemed to so love, pointing with one arm in the hard-stone box. It was quite the feat, Kadroo was definitely not light, and yet the girl had seemingly no problems just holding him with one arm. Nevermind the fact that he was still indignant about the whole situation.
Kadroo Long-Lake




The Noreaster | Cargo Bay

Kadroo was not overly fond of the noise that kept blazing past his hard-stone crate. His first instinct had been to duck and find cover of course, even as fire-spears whizzed back and forth nearby, which is what lead him to be in the hard-stone crate in the first place. He instantly regretted this though, as he poked his head out to see what had happened once no more fire-spears were being shot. The child-spirit was on the floor, curled into a ball, and tears were dripping to the floor even as fear rolled off her in waves. The short tree-bear wanted to continue hiding in the crate from the feeling alone. However, before that was his sense of duty to the spirits. He had hidden instead of staying like any good shamen might have and fighting as an acolyte for the safety of the tree-spirit and representative of Chok’ra. The bear shaman slipped out of his crate and moved himself over to the she-spirit on the floor, temporarily ignoring the hard-stone golem that stood over her like a protector. He set his spear down on the floor halfway from her, so as not to catch the attention of the Hardstone golem, and then waddled over to her, bending down to pat her on the shoulder comfortingly. ”Weechu zeekee kna da Chok’ra.” He said soothingly, attempting to comfort the young tree-spirit. ”Nub x’ekra kla kna ehda!” Then waddled over to pick up his spear before grabbing his spear and standing beside the metal thing, leveling it towards the direction the fire-spears came from originally.

Lucien




The Noreaster | Cargo Bay

Lucien’s day was turning into a bit of a mess, but at least it was a mess he could handle. Over the blaster fire he had heard the shout of sharps, crying out that he was throwing a thermal detonator. Lucien didn’t have time to argue with him, but he did make a mental note to go after the clone’s ass later. Thermal detonators were just about the last thing you wanted rolling around in an enclosed space, much less one that you wanted to take into space. It was literally just a contained fission reaction, and typically one was all it took to put a nice hole in a wall. The kind of damage it could do to the ship was unthinkable, and seeing as only one blaster bolt had come down range, suggesting one hostile, there was very little reason to use such a weapon, blasters did the same job just fine after all. A small thought distracted him as he wondered if the mechanism to lock the loading bay ramp had been broken, as this hostile had seemingly come from there. Thankfully he could count on Sable in this situation, as the robot activated the boarding protocol, sending the ship into darkness, and drew his own blaster to return fire.

Overwhelming firepower seemed to carry the day as the boy was forced into cover, and the returning fire from him was inaccurate at best, the shots snapped off. The grenade, oddly but thankfully enough, rolled down the ramp rather than blowing up in the ship, Lucien thought that perhaps it landed in one of the specially made pits for explosives nearby as he heard the sonic blast in the distance. The consequences that could have arisen from such an explosion could have been drastic. ”Hold fire, the captain is down there!” Lucien shouted as he watched the boy, moving to another piece of cover to get a better sight on the pair. He had almost forgotten about the dog, only remembering as the creature bounded across his field of vision as he was moving. He would have shot the creature, save for the fact that the boy held out a fist and the creature instantly stopped where it was, still he couldn’t let it just run around. Flipping his blaster to stun, he’d fire a bolt at the creature, the blue ring heading for it as fast as a regular blaster bolt. He figured since it was stood still by warning of it’s master, and relatively short range, he’d be able to do that to knock it out for now, just until the creature could be restrained.
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