Avatar of Dion

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Recent Statuses

4 hrs ago
Current B B B B B B BURGAKING
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1 day ago
ah alts
1 like
1 day ago
what does mules mean in this context
1 like
2 days ago
Epic win!
2 days ago
she ocky my wocky
1 like

Bio

Just an Aragorn looking for his Arwen


Most Recent Posts

@Lord Wraith, sorry. I'm still here but these essays are taking longer than I'd anticipated. I have a feeling that the work load will not let up next term and that I've maybe been a bit overzealous in my estimation on whether or not I can participate.

I don't want to say I'm dropping out yet, but knowing myself and looking at the roster for next term I get the feeling that it's more or less inevitable so I'll spare you/the rest the anticipation of having to wait and just drop out now.
i missed the past updates apparently but 1.0 here now
@Lord Wraith I'm gonna do it for the sake of uniformity anyway but I might give it my own spin, if I think of something.
@Lord Wraith I'm guessing you want us to copy your formatting, or at the least the header, right?

@Eleven ay bro just wanna let you know the image is throwing up 404's and gang signs so it's probably behind a sign-up wall on a website that disallows hotlinking

try saving the image and reuploading it to imgur

EDIT: wait it's ezgif, you can't directly hotlink from ezgif
@Odin As promised, some commentary on your sheet.

The first thing that attracted me to your sheet personally is the amount of detail presented in your abilities section. As that is a very key component of the RP and due to the effort that I myself put into designing Hyperhumans and how their abilities work, I love seeing someone else put that same effort into explaining their character's abilities. The ability section covers not only how Jiao's gifts work but also discusses them and lends itself to explaining development and applications. The limitations and weaknesses are also equally thought out and everything is well said, no leaps in logic required to follow your thought process.

His skills stand out, like his abilities they are well detailed and lend themselves to helping explain the character and your characterization of him. This is particularly noteworthy with his final skill of dissimulation. The appearance description isn't long or wordy, not that it has to be. You've clearly and concisely described Jiao's appearance in a way that doesn't repeat the other information on the sheet but rather enhances it to give a fuller picture.

Jiao's backstory is sweet and concise, it doesn't waste details nor does it lack them. There's still plenty about Jiao that can be discovered in the IC but nothing that's apparently lacking or would make the reader wonder about the character. His personality sets him apart from other characters in the RP and I fully expect him to cause nothing but friction but that's a reason why he was accepted because he does have a three-dimensional personality and it only further enhances the cast which for the most part is made up of less abrasive people.


thamk u boss

I've knocked down one essay and have 2 more to go, so I'm still out of the running for a week or so (maybe?) but I'll try and keep track of what's going on OOC wise.
I will be busy this week due to having to write 3 essays on goon-ass topics, so if I seem AWOL, fear not.
<Snipped quote by Odin>

Apologies, I don't generally make those mistakes. As for commentary I can get you some tomorrow when I have a bit less Jack Daniels in my system.


Cheers, and no worries. These mistakes are easy to make anyway, I just wanted to avoid having it seep into the IC (at that point I'd probably change his name to Jai, tbh).
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