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Recent Statuses

6 yrs ago
Current 'I know the Goliath Fucking Bird-Eating Spider can't fly because if it could, it would have a different name entirely. We would call it "sir" because it would be the dominant species on the planet.'
7 likes
6 yrs ago
'There is no word in the English language for the feeling someone gets when they suddenly realize they're standing next to an unholy monster impersonating a human. Monstralization, maybe?'
2 likes
7 yrs ago
'If Zoey Ashe had known she was being stalked by a man who intended to kill her and then slowly eat her bones, she would've worried more about that and less about getting her cat off the roof.'
1 like
7 yrs ago
"And watch out for Molly. See if she does anything unusual. There’s something I don’t trust about the way she exploded and then came back from the dead like that."
7 likes
7 yrs ago
"We're talking about a tentacled flying lamp fucker, Dave. What are you prepared to call unlikely?"
2 likes

Bio


"OK, I've just about had my FILL of riddle-asking, quest-assigning, insult-throwing, pun-hurling, hostage-taking, iron-mongering, smart-arsed fools, freaks, and felons that continually test my will, mettle, strength, intelligence, and most of all, patience! If you've got a straight answer ANYWHERE in that bent little head of yours, I want to hear it pretty damn quick or I'm going to take a large blunt object roughly the size of Elminster AND his hat, and stuff it lengthwise into a crevice of your being so seldom seen that even the denizens of the nine hells themselves wouldn't touch it with a twenty-foot rusty halberd! Have I MADE myself perfectly CLEAR?!" - CHARNAME, Baldur's Gate


Most Recent Posts

In Blue Moon 8 yrs ago Forum: 1x1 Roleplay
It occurred to Carys, as she received Chase's text, that she should probably not be wearing her pajamas at quarter to noon. Her Juilliard sweat pants had seen better days, and the tank she'd pulled out was covered in paint from when she'd helped a friend remodel two summers ago. At least she'd showered. She'd been halfway to her bedroom when a gentle knock at the door heralded her company's arrival. Shit.

Carys padded towards the door, unlocking it and habitually reaching for a chain that wasn't there. Right. House in the suburbs, not her dingy apartment. Opening it wide, she looked up at Chase as she leaned against the door jam.

"Hey you," Carys grinned apologetically. He'd had the sense to wear real clothes, not beat up pajamas. There were a few holes near the hem of her shirt, and the bottom inch of the sweats had been stained from dragging on the ground, slightly too long for her stature. "Come in. Sorry about the mess."

Opening the door wide and beckoning him in, she stepped aside. She locked the door afterwards on instinct, barely giving it a thought.

"So, I literally just realized that I should probably not wear pajamas, because I suck at adulting," Carys laughed at herself lightly. "I'm going to put actual people clothes on, I'll be right back. Help yourself to whatever, I think there's some IPAs left in the fridge."
In Please Stay 8 yrs ago Forum: 1x1 Roleplay
It feels good to write again. I've missed this so much! ;A;
@TheDookieNut
I FINALLY POSTED
somehow I managed to reread our whole thread and bust this thing out over my lunch break ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hope it doesn't suck
November came with a sudden plummetting of temperature. Sadie hadn't wanted to leave her warm bed, still recovering from the late night of Halloween and the poor choice to eat sweets until she hated herself. It had taken both Tasia and Maryam badgering her to roll out of her crimson blankets and stumble to the loo. The dormitory was chilly. Someone had left a window open and frost glittered on the glass.

She felt considerably better after she got ready, bounding down the steps after the other girls. Asenath had woven twin braids into Sadie's red hair and they bounced cheerily as she caught up with Seine and George. In later years, undoubtedly the three of them would be teased for spending so much time together, and rumors would fly. But the innocence of youth made their friendship easy, free of complication.

"Hiiiiii!" Sadie greeted with exaggerated vocal fry. Seine chuckled, clearly chalking it up to a weird muggle thing.

They'd nearly made it to the great hall when George's brother snatched the back of his jumper. Sadie frowned deeply, looking between the pair as the elder Nott dragged the younger off. It was hard to like Theo after The Race. She did her best not to voice her displeasure or make George uncomfortable, but she couldn't help but scowl after the Ravenclaw.

"C'mon Sades," Seine gently tugged her arm. Sadie unclenched her fists--she hadn't even realised she was so tense--and took a deep breath. She beamed at Seine, flouncing along with the taller boy.

They found their usual spot near the Head Table, chattering brightly. Sadie didn't notice the smattering of upset faces, too happy to have breakfast and the post coming in. The owls were still one of her favorite parts of the morning, swooping and dropping parcels and papers.

George dropped down next to her, looking paler than usual. Sadie frowned, cocking her head at him. She shared a worried look with Seine.

"George?" Sadie ventured, but her voice was drowned out in the beatings of wings and the cries of hundreds of owls.

A parcel was dropped next to her plate, adorned with her mum's neat handwriting. Seine accepted a copy of the Prophet from his handsome tawny owl, thanking the bird. As he unfolded the paper, his face dropped. With dread pooling in her stomach, Sadie looked over to read massive letters above a photo of a terribly familiar building.

MASS BREAK OUT AT AZKABAN
DEPARTMENT OF MAGICAL LAW ENFORCEMENT REFUSES TO COMMENT ON THIS "ACTIVE INVESTIGATION"


"No," Seine muttered, looking grim. Sadie looked over to George, concern painted on her features. His expression connected the dots on all the hints. Oh. Oh. Was one of those escapees related to him?

Sadie touched his elbow instinctively, uncertain what to say but plainly worried.

"Look," Seine whispered. Tension was rippling throughout the Great Hall as silence gave way to a buzz of activity. There were students all over the Great Hall shrinking, looking sick, angry, stone faced...

"V," Niall muttered from across the table. Sadie followed his gaze to the dark haired Slytherin girl they'd crossed the lake with. She was staring resolutely at her plate, spine ramrod straight. Someone passed and hissed something at her--the girl flinched, and then pursed her lips into a scowl. Niall sprang to his feet, looking furious, but the girl (Verdana, she remembered suddenly) pushed away from the table and began to walk briskly out the hall. Sadie turned to look at Niall as he followed.

Several students were leaving suddenly, whereas others had been cornered, either shouted at or arguing with other students. Suddenly, Sadie found herself scared. Her grip tightened on George's arm. Seine took her other hand, lacing his dark fingers with her.

"Don't run," he spoke to George, "It's not your fault--"

There was a shout as a fight broke out, hexes and sparks filling the air. Sadie flinched, suddenly terrified.

Professor McGonagall entered the Great Hall at precisely that moment, her eyes sharp.

"Enough," her voice was magically enchanted to echo throughout the castle. "All students will report to the Great Hall immediately."
One day I'll remember to log in. Maybe.

<3 <3 <3 u r too sweet bbycakes. And yes. Samaire is The Saddest Murder Baby
In Please Stay 8 yrs ago Forum: 1x1 Roleplay
I can't believe I didn't think of Taco Time-o. dammit.

Ngl, I totally just wrote a Katie post. I've got that shit on stand by. The inspo was too strong!
In Please Stay 8 yrs ago Forum: 1x1 Roleplay
Take-o your time-o!

Yeah, this is our first sunny day in what feels like weeks. Hopefully it sticks around for the weekend!
@Thorned Hammer
Thought I'd give you a poke and see if you were still interested in this. (:
AND POST
Samaire couldn't stop crying. Shame burned along every nerve ending, eyes stinging no matter how fiercely she wiped them. Cheeks reddening with humiliation and tears alike, she knew she cut a pathetic figure. She was no First, no true avenger, a failure of Cathan. Her whole life, her uncle had tipped her chin up, had shown her how to keep her pain locked deep inside. Never let them see you falter, he'd told her. Samaire had thought she had learned the lesson well.

The nymph watched her impassively, with all the indifference of nature. It was not the spirits of her childhood, bound by old blood and deep affection for their watered down kin. Suddenly, fiercely, Samaire wanted nothing more than to be in Cathan waters, held by the river spirits that knew her heart, that loved her as much as spirits could. It was a childish wish, but no less ardent.

The spirit of the woods spoke only truth, even as her wordless speech shamed Samaire. She'd hobbled an unwilling creature. It was a man-thing, yes, but looking at it now it was hard to call it an abomination. It had not truly fought her in the past few weeks. It shrunk away whenever she neared, snapped its teeth, but it could have escaped. There had been nights when she was too tired to be vigilant, fingers stumbling on the chain. It could have ran, and yet...

She forced herself to meet its eyes, vision blurred by tears, nose running. She sniffed, hiccupped, and looked away. There was an intelligence of sorts there. Not human, not quite, but not purely animal either. Samaire wiped her eyes again, took shaking breaths and fumbled for her words.

"<It's all I have. It leaves, I...>" She made a frustrated sound. It had been so long since she had spoken in spirit tongue. The words seemed just beyond her reach. "<Scared. Have nothing. Plan...where go, don't...no...no track?>"

"I don't know what to do," Samaire slipped back into common, frustrated by her own inability to properly speak the language. She had no way of knowing if the nymph could follow her words. "Or where to go. I don't have any clues. I don't know who sent the glass-eyed men. There was nothing tying them to any of our rivals, no motive for them to slaughter my family, no trace of anything. I have to find whoever is responsible--it's the only way I can reclaim any shreds of honour. My family will die out, but I can't let our last memory be one of shame." She paused, fingers loosening on her blade, lowered and only a breath away from falling to soft earth. The tears in her eyes sprang anew. Samaire rasped, "When I kill those monsters, then I get to join my family in the beyond. I just want to be with them again."
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