Amelia took another drag of the cigarette just as Lila came into her range of vision. She wasn't sure what she hated more- the fact that her best friend had just made out with the one guy she had ever fallen in love with or the fact that she couldn't make her heart let go of Hunter. She balled her hands into fists, crushing what was left of the cigarette and burning her palm accidentally. She dropped the cigarette to the ground and looked at her bloody palm before sighing and dropping her head to her knees. She buried her face, she didn't want anyone to see her like this. Her head was pounding, and her heart seemed to stop working. Everything that Amelia worked so hard for was suddenly gone.
Amelia felt the heaviness of her chest, like she was suffocating. The tears wouldn't stop. The sobs began, making her entire body tremble. She just wanted to forget, that's all she had wanted. She didn't know Hunter still loved her. Last night he had acted like their chances together were less than none. He had a baby on the way for crying out loud! Amelia listened to Lila as her best friend tried to help her. When she asked what She could do, Amelia only knew one thing she needed.
"Please check on Adelisa," As much as it hurt her, she remembered talking Adelisa out of multiple suicide attempts. She was upset with Adelisa, yes, but Amelia still loved her.
"Please, run." Amelia said in as loud as her hoarse voice would allow her.
Amelia waited for Lila to go before laying on her side in the lounge chair. She curled into the fetal position, not caring who saw her. She knew she looked like a total mess. Some people would probably think she is crazy. This is how she laid in bed weeks after her and Hunter's break up. Refusing to eat, refusing to drink.. Anorexia took over. The empty feeling in her stomach was nothing compared to the gaping hole she felt in her heart.
"I just wanted to forget.." She whispered to only herself as she closed her eyes and felt the sobbing start once again.
Amelia ran her fingers through her hair. What always made her feel better? ...Singing. She was alone now, so she let herself go. The lyrics she almost instantly thought of she softly sung in a voice only Hunter had heard before.
"What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
But watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do.."