imacamoprincess

Empire of two

I bit my lip, keeping my eyes low. "She said she thought you would follow her - try to find her, thats why she didn't say anything. She thought you'd know that wasn't like her - that you'd track her down and want to know why. She did it so I wouldn't be forced to do what she was." I whispered softly, running my hand through my hair.

"She didn't want me to be taken away and not know my family like she was - she wanted me to be with my family. But...that never happened either." I whispered softly, slowly looking toward him. I bit my lip, slowly standing up as my father seemed to get more serious and stood in a military pose.

I sighed softly, feeling my fingers brush against the back of his hand - watching him as he walked away. The first time, I wasn't even born. But now, if this was anything like what my mom felt when she left - knowing she was leaving my father behind. All I honestly really wanted was to have my father in my life.

I sighed softly, my mother must have been heartbroken when she'd left. But she had left to keep me from being taken from them. Not only that but so they wouldn't get in trouble for not following orders. And now, honestly I knew at least a fraction of how much she'd been hurt.

I watched my father as he walked away - I had absolutely no idea where I was or where I was going. But I guess I'd have to figure it out since I couldn't exactly ask my father. I guess this would be one of those times my mother spoke of needing the force to help me with my journey.

I had to concentrate, slowly closing my eyes and forcing myself to relax. It took a matter of minutes before I knew where I was going. I slowly opened my eyes and slipped out of the building, heading down a random path that I knew would take me where I needed to go.

Soon I found myself covered in shadows, something I was so used to back home. Yet here, it made me uneasy - like it wasn't safe, almost like someone was going to grab me. I kept watch over my shoulder more than to watch where I was going, suddenly bumping into someone.

I quickly reached for my mothers light saber, ready to defend myself. But as I slowly looked up, noticing a familiar face from one of my fathers men - it made me relax, releasing the light saber. I remembered his name, it was Seven.

Empire of two

@Markofkri finally everything has calmed down a bit

Empire of two

@Markofkri will reply once I get off

Empire of two

I bit my lip, pressing my back against the wall as I ran my hand through my hair. Now I understood everything my mom every spoke about, now I understood thats why she did it. Maybe she was trying to protect me from being hurt like I was now, maybe she knew thats what his answer would have been if she'd asked him to go with her.

I kept my eyes low as I slid down to the floor, not looking toward my father. "Maybe thats why she told me you didn't want to be found. Maybe she was trying to stop me from being hurt because I'd told her multiple times I was tired of lying about where my father was." I whispered softly.

"She ran and hid because she knew the jedi would take me away from her, niether you or her would ever see me again if they took me away. She always said she thought the army was more important to you than anything else - I never wanted to believe her." I explained, feeling tears rolling down my cheeks.

I hated to say it but maybe my mother had been right, maybe the army was more important to him than his family. "Sure, you haven't been in my life for eighteen years. So lets just do more damage than whats already been done - thats perfect. I don't have my mother and you want to stay distant." I bit my lip, pausing a moment.

"You want to stay distant when this is the first time you've been in my life. So don't worry about me, you want to be distant and not step up to the plate of having a family...just like my mom came to the conclusion, you hurt her - she stayed up every night waiting, always made an extra plate at dinner for you."

I bit my lip, looking over at him a moment before looking away again. "Every night, even for my birthdays - she would give me at least one present saying it was from you. And as a little girl - I hated my birthdays because every year I wished for you to come home." I whispered softly, running my hand through my hair.

I sighed softly, "You already choose the army over my mother and I once. And if you hadn't then...maybe she'd still be alive. And now your choosing it over me when she's gone. So you don't have to worry about me - you know I'm alive. You know where I live. Honestly if you can't find me - I'll either be in jail or dead because I was seen with Republic soldiers." I muttered, slowly wiping a tear off my cheek.

Honestly, I guess I just thought he'd care enough to leave the army. I guess try to make up for the eighteen years he hadn't been there. "I know why my mother left and honestly, the same thing you did to the women you loved - your doing to you daughter eighteen years later." I whispered softly, wrapping my arms around myself as I looked over at him.

I knew the pain was clear in my eyes, along with betrayal. I couldn't believe it. Every year I'd wished for him to come home to us and he never did. My mother and I struggled, she'd wanted to reach out to him. But she was scared of this happening.

Empire of two

@Markofkri so sorry, finally able to get on.

Empire of two

I sighed softly, watching the doors close behind him. Now that I was alone, my mind just began to wonder through the past - going through my life with my mother. I remembered asking her why she left, why she hadn't stayed and let us be a family. She never liked talking about it and she hated when I brought it up, yet I was just looking for answers.

I bit my lip, looking over my shoulder as I heard my fathers voice. As my eyes landed on him, he told me we needed to talk - yet we couldn't talk here. I sighed softly, slowly nodding that I understood. I was curious, wanting to know what he wanted to talk about that couldn't be talked about now.

I easily followed after him, keeping up with him without any real issue. I could sense that something was up, like he was arguing with himself. I just wish I knew right now what he wanted to talk about. But I guess I would find out when we got to wherever he was taking us.

I followed him to the building, having to stay rather close to him so I could hear him. I sighed softly, slowly looking down as he spoke. "Do you ever think maybe thats why my mother never asked you to come? That maybe that's why she left and never told you about me besides in that letter?" I asked softly.

I remembered my mother saying that the army was very important to my father and that she felt he wouldn't leave. "I remember her saying that's why she never told you, because of how you felt about the army - that you probably wouldn't leave to raise me." I added softly, slowly looking up at him.

"When I was younger, every night before bed I'd sit by the window for hours and wait - hoping that one day...you'd come over the hill and I'd actually have an actual family like all my friends did. But it never happened, it was always just me and her. She said the army was more important to you than anything else." I muttered.

I slowly met his eyes, sighing softly as I felt tears stinging the back of my eyes. "I guess maybe she was right, maybe the army is important to you - more than your family. For once in my life, I thought I was actually going to have a relationship with someone I haven't had in my entire life." I whispered softly.

"The choice is yours, not mine. I mean, you made your choice nineteen years ago. Now its just me and not my mother - I mean honestly, you hurt her when you didn't try to find her." I whispered softly, studying him a moment. Was I important enough to him to leave the army?

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Bump - still looking

Empire of two

@Markofkri finally replied.

Empire of two

I groaned softly, that hadn't exactly how I expected my father to wake me up - my mother had never woken me up that way, besides when I got her mad. But she barely ever stayed mad at anyone over night, especially me. I sighed softly, slowly getting up and running my hand through my hair. It was going to take a bit of getting used to, having my father in my life - who hadn't been there my entire life until now. I bit my lip, "Its definitely gonna take some getting used to." I whispered softly.

Still, it felt like a void had been filled, yet another opened. My father was in my life but everything I'd seen girls my age do with their fathers - I felt it wouldn't happen. It didn't take long for me to unbraid my hair and find my way to where my father was as we landed. I thought we were at the base we were going to, yet we weren't. We were at a random spaceport.

I was confused why we'd stopped here and even more confused when one of my fathers men was left there in civilian clothing. It was the same man who had saved me and who had been staring at me the entire way to the ship. But I didn't say anything, I didn't question it - even if the curiosity was killing me. It didn't make any sense why they just had dropped him off like that.

Yet when we landed and I exited the ship with my father and he explained that he needed to report in and report the loss of one ofhis men, that I wasn't allowed. I merely nodded, "Okay, I understand." I whispered softly as he said he'd be right back. I somewhat understood how the army worked with my very few encounters with them. And by very few, I meant about two or three times, this time being maybe the third or fourth.

It seemed to me that the Chancellor was on top and controlled the senate and the jedi and the jedi controlled the clones. It didn't seem much fair that they were created and born just to fight and die. And it'd be clear enough now that they had normal feelings - that they wanted freedom, love, and a family. But that began to make my mind begin to work as I watched my father walk away.

How would he explain who I was? Who my mother was? Wouldn't he get in trouble for that? If he did get in trouble, what would they do to him? I bit my lip, running my hand through my hair.

Empire of two

@Markofkri sorry woke up late - will reply tonight when I get home. I swear, then I'm off work tomorrow - only thing I have to do is take my dog to get her nails done.