Kamen Evie — Roleplayer Guild

@Mr Allen J

Jill's edits are finished. Here's another summary.

Stance requirements, EX-ACT requirements, and so on, are now listed much more clearly under each move instead of being represented by weird acronyms. They're even color-coded by stance!
Added a few words into the weaknesses section to allude to the fact that she has like four special attacks when off of her bike and two of those need charges to use.
Would have included a drawing if I'd actually finished it. I figured I'd just post the app for now since it'll be out there and ready to judge and have the picture done before I head off to bed, hopefully.

Probably didn't need to put those in a list, but whatever.

Better known as...

⦋ 25  || American  || Female ⦌

APPEARANCE & PERSONALITY

APPEARANCE          
In keeping with a stereotype she really had no need of following, Jill looks more like some sort of anime cowgirl than any normal person from her region, complete with big high boots, stetson hat, and a leather… jacket. Long blonde hair goes down past her shoulders and frames some nice blue eyes, a pretty nose, and (on a good day) a smile that could take on the world. She wears a red bandanna around her neck, and she wears a white tank top under her jacket that shows both her toned arms and a bit of cleavage from her respectable chest, though she’s fine with swapping it out for a long-sleeved white t-shirt if the weather inclines her to. She wears form-fitting jeans that show off her similarly toned legs, held together by a belt with a buckle shaped like the initials “BB.” She speaks with a notable Southern accent, and she carries a black guitar case on her back, containing both a pristine acoustic guitar and the trademark Bolt Suit, which she puts on during battle.

The Bolt suit itself is something that seems to have leapt straight out of a tokusatsu show (which in a way, it did), covered in deep blues, whites, and white-blues. The helmet bears resemblance to a motorcycle helmet, with a prominent metal chin guard and a “BB”-shaped emblem on the left hand side. An ethereal blueish-white scarf trails behind her, resting on deep blue shoulder pads. The outfit is capped off by striking white gauntlets and knee-high boots.

She’s accompanied by a rectangular floating drone designated P1T-5T0P (nicknamed Pit Stop), about the size of a football, that fits into her bike and serves as her cameraman, as well as a repair crew during combat when she’s too occupied to do so herself.

PERSONALITY TRAITS          
-Hot-blooded
-Thrill-seeker
-Jovial
-Strong sense of justice balanced by a hint of pragmatism
-Appreciates etiquette
-Totally not a huge nerd.

BACKSTORY & MOTIVATION          
A little over 100 years ago, in the aftermath of the first World War, there was a man by the name of Ryuji Raiden (or at least, that’s what he said it was). Showing up with a bolt of lightning, he would leap off of his motorcycle and dispatch evil (particularly other ki users) with furious fists of flame and fascinating gadgets. A pretty eccentric guy, but with enough charisma to become quite the topic of interest as he spread justice across the nation. His exploits only grew in number and notoriety, culminating in an incident in the aftermath of World War 2 where he allegedly fought against a kaiju, though whether or how much of that actually happened and how much credit he deserved for it remains unclear. As he participated in operations around the world, he eventually reached celebrity status, turning to decadence, with a radio drama being made based on his journeys.

Things eventually began to slow down, though. The guy was getting old, and between the money he was making from the entertainment industry and the various grants he was getting for some of his gadgets meant it was time for him to finally settle down and spend time with his family, training his son in his martial arts as well as checking in to see how the new official “Lightning Rider” television show was doing every once in awhile. In his final days, he had a secret to share.

Ryuji Raiden had slept around. Like, a lot. More than any defender of justice should have, though really everyone should have seen it coming. If he’d been to a country on a mission, chances were there was at least one sweetheart there, and if there was a sweetheart, there was a decent chance that there was an illegitimate child, too. He had decided to split his fortune equally across his descendants before he passed, and they eventually convened to discuss what to do with all that money.

After lengthy debate, they decided to establish the hero organization “SHINING”, dedicated to funding good old-fashioned superheroism in Japan, America, and later, most of Europe. They also continued their father’s legacy by forming a team of heroes known as the Justice Riders, using vehicles and special suits to uphold justice across the world. The merchandise and TV show changed to match, the “Justice Riders” show in particular being popular worldwide despite a low budget. They did well at keeping the peace, though as the responsibility of heroism was passed down through generations, the family began to slowly drift apart. Be it through death, conflicting responsibilities, disagreements or the simple urge to follow one’s own path, the number of active Justice Riders dwindled, and those who remained weren’t nearly as close and coordinated with each other as they used to be. The Justice Riders officially disbanded in 2005, though the TV show continued production. It just didn’t have the “based off of a true story” shtick to wave around anymore. SHINING also had to carry far more of its own weight, though it survived well enough.

Jill Breicen is one of those descendants, and she grew up with her younger sister during the Justice Riders’ waning years, and the stories of her family’s adventures were a source of bittersweet entertainment for her. Now, she carries on their legacy as a new Justice Rider, blazing a trail of justice across the land… All while gathering footage for the show, of course.

FIGHTING STYLE & ABILITIES

FIGHTING STYLE          In addition to respectable strength, durability, senses and reflexes, Jill is well-trained in her family’s very own Burning Bolt style, passed down and refined through generations of laying triumphant beatdowns to dastardly villains. Getting up close and personal and using heavy punches, kicks, and grapples, every move is imbued with stylistic flair that would make any of them look great on a poster (and apparently do, according to product sales numbers). For those who like to keep away, she uses the legendary Starbolt whip to both deny projectile attacks and bring opponents in close for a proper confrontation. Her ki talents mostly involve creating “hard light” barriers and projections that she uses to defend herself from attacks and create platforms, but its true potential is squandered on its own.

Enter her own personal Trailblazer style and her incarnation of the family’s signature motorcycle; Nine Breaker. Weighing in at 621 pounds and boasting an extremely powerful three-way hybrid engine that can run on gasoline, electricity, and ki, this blood-red, absolute monster of a vehicle requires a special kind of insanity to even drive, let alone use in combat. The Trailblazer style revolves around this, using the machine’s ample supplies of mass and velocity to charge forwards and demolish whatever happens to be in her path at the moment, whether that be through elaborate powerslides, jumps, and wheelies, or simply charging towards an opponent at high speeds, using both her ki talents and the bike’s bulk to shrug off attacks and ram them off the road. The Starbolt is used in conjunction with the Bolt Suit’s increased strength to both grab opponents, and to attach the end to the bike itself and fling it around like an oversized morning star. She can use her ki powers to create ramps and platforms to bring the bike into the air or even across walls. Very unrefined as a martial art, but nothing to scoff at when every attack almost literally hits like a truck.

Both styles are further reinforced by the EX-ACT system. Both the bike and the power suit run in part off of the user’s ki, which can be stored in up to three EX-Cells (stored in the bike) and three EX-Seeds (stored in the suit), and these are each tied to fire and electricity, respectively. Cells can be expended to bring some fabulous flames to Nine Breaker’s attacks, and Seeds can be used to shock and stun opponents on foot, damaging them and giving a nice opportunity to extend a combo. Her incarnation of the family’s trademark Starbolt whip is formed from one of Nine Breaker’s handles, and this (somehow) allows her to carry one EX-Cell with her to bring some flames to her fisticuffs.

SPECIAL MOVES & TECHNIQUES          

■   [Come on, Nine Breaker!/Pit Stop!]
Any Stance
Jill either summons Nine Breaker onto the stage or somersaults off of it and sends it away. While it's gone, P1T-5T0P controls the bike while repairing whatever damage it may have incurred. While she’s on it, the drone patches up any holes in her suit.]

■   [EX-Charge]
Any Stance
If on the bike, Jill revs the engine and channels some of her ki into it, filling up an EX-Cell. She can either hold this move to charge an EX-Seed, spam this a couple more times to fill the remaining Cells, or immediately switch over into another attack. 

If off the bike, Jill strikes a pose and breathes deeply as she gradually fills EX-Seeds with ki. This takes a bit longer than filling Ex-Cells, but unlike EX-Cells, Ex-Seeds can hold a partial charge, so the effort isn’t wasted if the process is interrupted.

More efficiently, Jill can also use EX-Charge EX] while using the Burning Bolt style. Through opening herself to attack for a second by beckoning the enemy and taunting them, sheer confidence and heroic spirit flow throughout her being, immediately charging EX-Seeds. The exact number filled depends on her distance from the enemy; taunting a far-off opponent fills one seed, a mid-range taunt will fill two, and a close-range one will fill all three.

■   [Trailblaze!]
Any Stance
Trailblaze EX: Trailblazer Stance, requires 1 EX-Cell or 1 Ex-Seed
Jill uses her ki to create a hard light object, be that a ramp, a platform, or tracks for Nine Breaker to stick onto, that fades after a few seconds. Trailblaze EX creates a flaming or electrified wall of light emanating from behind her bike that can be used to control space in the playing field for a while… provided that she doesn’t run into it herself.

■   [Burning Blue Kick!]
Any Stance
Burning Blue Kick EX: Any Stance, requires 1 EX-Cell or 1 EX-Seed
Dragon Bolt Kick: Any Stance, requires 1 EX-Cell and 1 EX-Seed
Jill leaps into the air from either the ground or her bike and sails downwards towards her opponent with a foot outstretched, rebounding off of them if it hits and landing back on the bike if it was initiated from the Trailblazer style. The move can be strengthened with either EX-cells or EX-seeds to provide a little bit of extra oomph with the suit’s jets and fire or electricity, respectively. If both are used at the same time, the move becomes Dragon Bolt Kick, a spinning dive kick surrounded by a maelstrom of fire and lightning.

■   [Justice Crash!]
Trailblazer Stance
Justice Crash EX: Trailblazer Stance, requires 1 EX-Cell
Nine Breaker’s engine roars as Jill drives straight towards her opponent, using her ki to form a giant plow that gives her a few hits of super armor while she charges at them. The EX version of the attack is far faster, crossing the stage almost instantly.

■   [Comet Crash!]
Trailblazer Stance, requires 1 EX-Cell
Nine Breaker roars as it charges forwards for but a moment before Jill fakes out and shifts to the side, digging a powerful heel in the ground. She steps off of the bike while holding on to it by the Starbolt whip, swinging it forwards like a giant flail before letting it and the distressed drone attached to it fly through the air towards the enemy. Damaging, but has a long windup for a projectile, and this damages the bike enough for it to need half a minute for repairs. Even if Jill tries to call it back, P1T-5T0P will probably be too pissed about the ordeal to bring it to her until it’s back in proper condition.

■   [Power Slide!]
Trailblazer Stance
Power Slide EX: Trailblazer Stance, requires 1 EX-Cell
Jill charges towards her opponent as if using Justice Crash before faking out at the last moment by leaning heavily to one side, turning and sweeping at the opponent’s legs with the back wheels before speeding back to her previous position. Power Slide EX engages the vehicle’s thrusters, coating the opponent in flames.

■   [Burnout Twist!]
Trailblazer Stance, requires 1-3 EX-Cells
Jill spins the bike in a circle, flames spraying around her as she moves forwards. It doesn’t come out as fast as many of her other moves or do as much damage initially, but she can repeat this move once or twice more depending on how many EX-Cells she has stored. As she needs to focus on righting her course after the initial spins, she’s left open if she misses.

■   [Flaming Forever!]
Trailblazer Stance
Jill pops a wheelie and spins in place before jumping into the air and striking a pose so stylish that it fills all three of both her EX-Cells and Ex-Seeds. If there are any already filled, the excess is vented into the air around her in the form of lightning and/or flames. The damage depends on how many extra cells there were, though it’s still nothing noteworthy and admittedly more for aesthetic flair than as an actual attack. If she’s attacked during the pose, she’ll be knocked off the bike, which will likely fall over for a few seconds until either she or her drone can push it back up again.

■   [Vanquish Buster!]
Burning Bolt Stance, requires 1 EX-Cell or 1 EX-Seed
Jill grabs her enemy, taking them into the air with the suit’s thrusters before turning them upside down as they fall, smashing them into the ground head-first.

■   [Jetstream Slam!]
Burning Bolt Stance, requires 1 EX-Cell or 1 EX-Seed
Jill engages the suit’s thrusters and dashes towards the enemy at high speeds with a hand outstretched, grabbing them by the face and slamming them into the ground.

■   [Rolling Thunder!]
Burning Bolt Stance
Rolling Thunder EX: Burning Bolt Stance, requires 1 EX-Cell or 1 EX-Seed
Jill rears back for a moment before throwing all her might into a punch that will send most foes sprawling. Being heavily telegraphed and without much range, it only becomes truly useful when the EX effects are applied, coating her body in flames or electricity that punish any incoming melee attacks while she charges up an elemental punch.

SUPER MOVES          

■   [Justice Grind: Let’s Burn Some Rubber!]
Trailblazer Stance
Jill takes her whip and wraps it around her opponent’s neck before popping a stoppie and holding both ends of the whip in one hand, pulling them against the back wheel. She hits the gas hard as the tire grinds the enemy down, finishing by releasing them right as she lets the back wheel of the bike fall back down onto them and driving right over her downed target.

■   [Lightning Rush: Chains of Justice!]
Burning Bolt Stance, requires 1 EX-Seed
Jill swings her whip sideways and wraps her opponent in it, channeling stunning electricity through it before throwing the handle around them and unleashing an eight-hit rush of all-out punches and kicks on her restrained opponent, punctuated by an elegant Northern Lights Suplex.

■   [EX-MAX: Nine Breaker’s True Fury!]
Trailblazer Stance, requires all 3 EX-Cells and all 3 EX-Seeds
Nine Breaker and its predecessors were intended to combine with similar vehicles from heroes across Jill’s family tree to form a giant mecha for when shit really hits the fan. Though that hasn’t happened for decades, Jill won’t let this go to waste: Charging forwards, she dismounts Nine Breaker as it turns into a giant fist that connects to the Bolt Suit by sprouting various cords as they both send their respective boosters into overdrive, scorching anything behind her in a sea of flame. A sonic boom is created followed by a sickening crunch as she hits the target with a blow meant to take down a kaiju. Though it’s an absolutely devastating attack, the function was obviously never intended to be used on its own this way, and Nine Breaker will need a minute for repairs at the very least before it can be called upon once more. Really not something she uses too often.

WEAKNESSES & LIMITS          
Jill can deliver some righteous beatdowns, but she needs breathing room to pull it off. EX Attacks can be devastating, but if an attack doesn’t require EX-ACT to function, it’s likely to require it to get the most out of the move or even for it to be useful in the first place. Persistent opponents that can prevent her from charging will practically cripple her, especially if she's off her bike. Despite having many attacks that work at range, she can’t take advantage of the safety that range gives her: She’s all about charging in and using that momentum to keep the attacks coming.

In addition, while she’s a master at her own method of combat, she never bothered to learn much of the Burning Bolt style. If she’s kept away from her bike, she won’t be nearly as effective.

While the Trailblazer style is a recent, largely unknown creation, the Burning Bolt style has been televised often enough to be known to fans across the world. It doesn’t take much research to know what moves she’ll be using ahead of time.

Being quite the thrill-seeker, Jill will tend towards the more dramatic and flashy option whenever she can justify indulging herself, even if there’s a less risky option available.

OTHER

“Come on! I’m gettin’ bored over here!” (Generic)

“Wanna get trashed, Genos?” (Vs. Justin)

“How do you like me now?!” (Vs. Seven-Seven)

“Yeah, just sit there and guard while I power up.” Vs. (Brooke)

“Guess I was overestimatin’ you when I said you were second-best, hon.” (Vs. Margot)

“Well look at that! A Canadian who’s almost figured out how to work a gun!” Vs. (Otsana)

“Are weak insults a British thing or is that your gimmick, specifically?” (Vs. The One)

“Do your Horizon boys give you treats when you behave?” (Vs. SYM-04)

“Would you like some fries with your beating?” (Vs. Hank)

“Your glorious leader couldn’t afford enough bullets to take me on.” (Vs. Chung)

“Pick up your gun, just try and shoot me, Cowboy!” (Vs. Voyt)

“What’s the matter? Forget to knock the dirt out of your ears?” (Vs. Inanna)

“Keep fannin’ those flames, hon! Boy did I dodge a bullet, there.” (Vs. Yen)

“You sure you don’t wanna fight Pit Stop instead, little guy?” (Vs. Askin)

“Did you happen to get a red armband with that outfit, Stormtrooper? (Vs. Abel)” 

“HAHA, YEAAHH! LET’S ROCK, BEAUTIFUL!” (Flaming Forever, generic)

Despite having what is essentially a small power suit stuffed inside her guitar, it still plays with a pleasant sound. She can also change into the suit in a quick, blinding flash of light, with her shortest time being just over a millisecond. Whether these are due to some sort of ki technique or the result of technology are a complete mystery.

Most of Jill’s equipment is of her own design, including Pit Stop.

@lavulman

I've read Jill's sheet and I am digging the theme you have going. I like how you managed to make her moveset seem like something out of rodeo or cattledrive with her motorcylce and whip. The idea of a superhero family is amusing, and the overal flair is amusing. 

My main issue with the sheet is related to how the information is formatted. I understand having the character have different moves be available in different forms; I used a similar mechanic with Otsana. There is nothing wrong with having a resource system either. However the information about both the Forms and Resource Costs, I feel, is poorly organized. For example, I needed to ask Savo what you meant by "TB" and "BB", which I undersand to be Trailblazer and Beautiful Blaze. Once I understood that my understanding of your movelist became much clearer. A short glossary of terms would help.

My suggestion is largely organizational. The attacks can be split up into three categories: On Foot, On Motorcyle, and Both. It also seems that the type of EXACT energy, Ex-Cells vs Ex-Seeds (Love the puns BTW), are directly tied to if the attack is used in TB or BB form. If that is the case, then you could just state that a particular attack requrires X 'charges' of the relevant resource. I also noticed that you didn't mention a max level of charages for each resource in the fighting style description. 

My other suggestion is to obfuscate certain aspects for simplicity. For the Ex-Cells and Ex-Seeds, the only major difference between the two I could see is how quickly they charge and their elemental associations. Since they are both derived from Jill's Ki, consider combining the two on a mechanical level, as in just keep track of the total number of charges between the two systems unless you want the suit and bike to have seperate power sources. You could still choose fire or electricity with each attack. 

In conclusion, I do like the high concept of the character. However I feel that the relatively straightforward ideas are muddled by confusing formatting of the data. At the very least, my 1:30 am self had difficulty following all the information.@redbaron1234

Thanks! It's kind of almost 4 AM here because I've been drawing for too long, but I'll try and respond as best I can before I fall over.

Yeah, I was probably a little too concise with the way I listed things. I'll fix that.

She can hold 3 of each type of charge, I'll add that into the fighting style section.

I do still kind of want to keep them separate if at all possible. It makes a bit more sense to me that they would each have their own separate power source, and limiting her to once Cell off the bike without a way of getting it back in the meantime is a nice way of preventing her from spamming Dragon Bolt Kick (or those other non-bike moves that required one of each type that I changed/took out anyways). It's a bit too powerful to be used so easily and I think it would lose its flair if it could be used so often.

I'mma go to bed and work on fixing the sheet up some more tomorrow.

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