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I'm Batman...

Just KIDDING!
I am just another run of the mill nerd who likes to kick ass and raise a few virtual zombies online. I like pirates, whales, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, necromancers and above all anything to do with the ocean. I am up for almost any kind of roleplay, with the aim to not make any grammatical errors or to BECOME THE OVERLORD OF SUPER POWER NEVER TO BE DEFEATED BECAUSE I AM SO UNDENIABLY AWESOME! Oh and did I also mention...

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Ylva Lindstrom
Location: Ylva's Homestead in Ballara



Ylva sat at her long table, sipping a rich mead out of a horn leisurely as one of her guests, Ofeig Braesisson, the chief miner of the Aldur mines closest to the hobgoblin territory, joked about how one of the miners peed his pants when a few of the men used a hobgoblin skull to play a jab at the fellow. The other two men at her table, Gils Thormodsson and Liut Slodisson were heartily feasting on dire-boar caught by her and Ragnar this morning. It was sweetened by local herbs and honey over an open fire, and served with small potatoes and carrots grown in her own personal gardens by the animal sheds. Ragnar nibbled his own thigh by the fire, and the atmosphere seemed warm and comfortable. Ylva sipped her mead and turned to Liut, the only trader in the group who had some interactions with the hobgoblins. He was fairly close to Rollo and met him on the road multiple times. She spoke evenly her voice breaking through the laughter,"I am happy you could make it here Slodisson, I know you should be on the road, but Odinkar wishes me to obtain information about the hobglobin tribes in the area. What you have provided was incredibly useful. I am indebted to you."

She was indebted, Liut was a great friend and she was lucky to catch him before he left for the season. Rollo always trusted him, and even though her husband was gone, he had a knack for knowing a person by instinct. Liut gave her a charming smile, his green eyes and long braided hair made him handsome, almost too handsome if she had to admit. His mouth was another thing all together, he was witty and confident and he always like to tease her when he had the opportunity. She allowed it, because not many others dared to try.
"Of course, Ylva, and again you can call me Liut. Anytime I get invited into your home is a pleasure, especially when you serve such succulent boar. Rollo married well, when he asked your father for your hand." Liut replied pleasantly.

HA! More like my father begged him to take my ugly mug because no other man would. Plus he damn well knows I didn't cook this boar myself. She gave a wry smile, taking a sip from her horn,"Well he certainly never complained much when he was here. Shame your own wife doesn't get the opportunity to see you as often as she likes, your two little ones must miss you."

Liut frowned, a sadness creeping into his eyes, "Yes, I miss Frigg probably as much as Odin does when he is away. As for my little ones, they are almost full grown. Waltheof will be joining me next season to learn the roads. He is already my height, growing boy that he is."

Gils gave a chuckle beside him,"You'll have to introduce him to mine own, Magnus, built like an Ox and swings a pick-axe like Thor using Mjolner."

Gils was Ylva's favourite at the table, a plump man with six children and a mind that forgot nothing. If anyone knew anything about the territory in the area it was Gils. He was a seasoned hunter with his family lineage stretching over thousands of generations in Ballara. To the common people, he would seem of little importance, seeming as his skills weren't well known, but this man was a trove of knowledge gathered over history and time that Ylva always found invaluable. She never started a mission without speaking to Gils. For example when she last took on a raid across the water, it was Gils knowledge of boat crafting and the level of the tides that helped her defeat some long boats with some well placed pikes. Sometimes he was useful, other times he was just another person she liked to call a friend, or even a mentor.

"I've actually seen Magnus in action, shame there isn't a spear in that hand. It is a good choice for him to become a miner though, I'm sure every maester needs their apprentice. Aside from this prattle though, I must go over what you have all shared and come up with a plan to save our economy. Ofeig Braesisson if you can get me some miners willing to travel with us and are prominent enough for the others to trust, I would be glad to take them. I'll come for the men in a week, and they will be protected. I assure you on my honor I will keep your men safe." Ylva swore earnestly

Ofeig nodded,"I trust your word Lindstrom, even if you're a woman. A jest that Odin put such a strong warrior in the body of a female. Frigg must have forced his hand on that one. Now aside from business have you heard the second one's coming back. Thorbrand I hear?"

Ylva kept her expression calm,"That is what Thane Odinkar has told me. Didn't give me a reason."

Liut chirped in quickly,"Apparently his wife passed. Something about her eating a bad fish of some sort. He has no reason to stay now, so he has decided to return, which is what I have heard from a few traders that reside there."

Gils laughed,"I still remember that little blond haired brat. He was always trying to follow his big brother around. Brave little thing, he was."

Ylva smirked,"I'm sure Baldur will be pleased to recieve his brother, I haven't seen my youngest since he decided to travel to the south and get married."

Gils spoke again, "Oh I'm sure Baldur will be thrilled that he has another contender for chief. Aside from you of course Ylva."

Ylva's smile turned slightly sour, as she poured a few horns of mead and passed them around,"Don't speak such words, Gils. I do not have the right or even the lineage to claim that honor. Baldur has no threat in me."

Liut laughed,"You act as if it is your choice Ylva. If you're chosen, then you must take the throne."

Ylva slumped slightly, hating that he was right,"Let's stop discussing such trivial topics. This is just old people at a table talking about politics. Who are we to know what the people, or even the gods want. The men love Baldur, and he is Odinkar's son, the people will choose wisely, I have no doubt. As for now, it's probably time for you all to be on your way. I have a busy night of planning, and with hope I can come up with some plan to deal with these pesky hobgoblins. Again thank you all for the help. You are welcome under my roof anytime. Now Liut you can take a guest bed if you wish to leave in the morning."

Liut gave her a charming smile,"I'm afraid I wouldn't trust myself with you alone, beauty."

Ylva detested how much she enjoyed his teasing,"Well it wouldn't be just us Liut, Ragnar always shares my room now that Rollo had passed."

Liut looked over at Ragnar who was currently gnawing on his bone,"I suppose its for the best that I should be on my way. I have paid for a room already, I might as well use it."

Ylva almost laughed,"Very well then."

The evening ended quickly, with the men leaving her alone with nothing but thoughts, dirty dishes and knowledge for the future. After helping her servants clean up she headed to bed, crawling under her blankets and skins to get warm, with Ragnar coming up to slump against her feet as he had done since he was a puppy. She couldn't tell you how comforting he was when Rollo had passed. Too many nights, tears had stained her bed, now all that was left was his blue scarf that hung loosely on a hoof by her shield. She kept it in eyes view, as it gave her comfort when the world seemed so complicated. It was also the last thing she saw before she shut her eyes, finally finding some sleep.


I couldn't resist!
-checks rp pulse- "She might be dead Jim."
Jim:"Noooooo!!"

Viking comic strip of the day!
Ylva raised her head from watching Ragnar and blanked for a few seconds. Thorbrand... All she could picture was a young scraggly headed kid who teased her because she couldn't throw an axe. Friends. Before he left they were friends. She listened quietly at Odinkar's request and gave a small nod,"If he arrives before the scouts return, and wishes to join us, I am sure I can make room for him, and his companions. I am sure Balder and Sunne will be happy to see their brother returning."

She gave a small smirk before whistling her wolf over to her,"I'll go find Olaeif and Svan and send them ranging tonight. I expect it will take them a week to fully scope out the area. If Thorbrand arrives early, send him over to my farm. Your plans are in good hands, my thane."

With that she exited the building, walking over to the local bar where she knew Olaeif and Svan were usually drinking too much. These two knuckleheads were always feasting too much, regardless of the fact that they were some of the best scouts in Ballarra. She sighed before entering the bar, feeling uncomfortable in a feasting atmosphere, which only intensified when the room seemed to grow quiet at her and Ragnar's presence. She looked over in the corner to find Svan and Olaeif surrounded by mugs of beer and giggling women, eager to warm there beds. The barkeep shouted from across the hall, carrying a few barrels of mead,"GET THAT BEAST OUT OF HERE! YOU SON OF A..Lindstrom? Sorry I didn't know."

Ylva looked over at him and gave a brief wave,"No, no. Ragnar's like a shadow, I never think of him. I won't be long. Svan, Olaeif, pay your beers and meet me by the stables. You have a mission. The rest of you! FEAST LIKE YOU'RE IN THE HALLS OF VALHALLA!"

She left a few gold coins on the counter as cheers and whistles filled the bar. She exited, with a somber expression, making her way over to the stables with the two men at her back. She gave a quick run-down of their mission and wished them luck,"Collect as much information as you can and be back within the week, if you are seen or captured tell them nothing of our plans. Understood. I want every single detail, down to the clothes they are wearing and their daily routines if you can get close enough. Be back in enough time, and I will give each of you a bonus from my portion, when the raid is through. Now go, before the sun goes down."

Svan smiled,"Of course, M'am. We will do as Odinkar commands."
Olaeif laughed,"We'll even get their bathroom breaks down to the second my lady."

Ylva shook her head,"Well bowel movements are your specialty Selkollrsson, now get going before I cut you down for looking at me funny."

They laughed, before heading off into the night, whilst Ylva tried to remember a young boy she knew half a lifetime ago.
HAHA! I couldn't help myself!
Eliza stayed on the leader until the pistols were taken and Phineas was in the vehicle. She leaned down, speaking clearly in her hostage's ear, so even his men could understand her,"In a few seconds chap, I am going to remove my pistol from your skull and take a few steps back, if you and your men aren't running into the sunset by the time we are in that vehicle, I will make sure that the one person who plays my target is you. Now."

She stood slowly, the gun still pointed, as she let the man get up and turn to give her the deadliest glare that she has seen in awhile. She tried to mirror it before he spoke,"You will pay for this, next time."

She responded with a simple,"Run."

The men started running and she turned jumping into the car, as Phiny drove off. She kept her gun trained as Phineas brought life to this mechanical creature. She watched the men run for awhile before she felt safe enough to turn around and let out a gasp of air. She slumped in her chair, remaining quiet before a few moments before she asked a perspective question "I suppose you probably think that that was a bit impulsive?"

She waited for the chastise that usually came with her impulsive decisions. This was the second time she had taken action without consultation, and she didn't think that dear Phiny would be as patient with her, this time.

Ylva

Location: Edge of Ballara
Attack from the eastern beach. Break them down from the front as the other half of the fleet move up the Grandol river and break through the woods. Burn key buildings, home, barn, ships. No slaves. No survivors. No problems? Keep thinking...and breath idiot!

Ylva kicked down, her feet hitting the sand as she propelled herself up through the water, her arms pushing out as she rose to the surface, letting go of the large stone that fell into the depths. The cold water felt good against her skin, when suddenly air hit the top of her scalp and she took a deep breath. She gasped, coughing as a wet tongue came up to lick her cheek and forehead.

"Ragnar...Stop..Stop..Ragnar.."

A light laugh escaped her as she pulled herself onto the dock, her tunic crumpled beneath Ragnar's stomach. She put her hand on her bare hips, looking down at him with a quick shake of her head. She clicked her tongue, pushing the great beast off enough for her to grab her tunic and throw it on her body. Fuck it's cold.

She tousled the great dire wolf's head, before moving down the dock, her eyes locked on the large settlement, that seemed too big for only one person. If it wasn't Rollo's property, she probably would have encouraged Bjarg and Alvid's families to switch with her. She eyed Alvid's wife and kids just out near the barn, helping out with daily chores and playing around with the horses. She left them to their joys moving inside her home, where she looked towards the long hearth found in the center of the room. Platform benches covered in linens and pels gained from hunting and raids, were surrounded the sides of the home along with a few carved tables and stools that were filled with everyday items such as linens, bowls, small jewelry, combs, even some charms and wood carvings to dictate the gods. She moved to the largest bed in the house, her leather tunic, furs, gold bands, blue scarf, and boots set out for her. Her mind was awash with new plans for a coming raid, the small lake outside her home usually helped clear her mind, but today she seemed conflicted with her thoughts. Ragnar strolled towards his favourite bench, his canines digging into a deer bone he snagged during a hunt. Ylva got dressed quickly, grabbing her weapons off a few shelves and placing them on her body, before heading out.

"Bjarg. Bring me Damhus and be fast. I have a meeting with Odinkar and I wouldn't be much of a champion if I made him wait."

The older middleweight man nodded,"Of course. Right away."

She watched him move off to the barn, as she whistled for Ragnar and called out to the kids playing too near the lake, "Careful! We wouldn't want you to be a blota to Aegir before you grow up, and learn how to swim."

The young girl stopped shoving a stick at her brother and looked at Ylva with a smile,"Aegir could never take me down! I'm strong."

Ylva gave a small smirk,"I'm sure you are, but leave the big battles to your mother, she has the fierceness of Odin, that one."

Bjarg was back mid-way through her sentence, giving her the reins, and a small laugh, "Here you are M'am. I'll be sure to tell Friya of the compliment, the lady needs it with how many kids shes brought up."

"More then half the thane to be honest. I'll be back before the sun falls, so have my fire lit and leave out some fish for me."

With that she was off, another short whistle encouraging Ragnar to dart past the horse, whilst keeping nearby.
(WELL SHIT SON!)

Eliza stopped her tears immediately, as the rounds fell to the ground, the world turning silent as the leader spoke, waiting sarcastically for an answer. She curved her head to the side, her demeanor changing immediately as she began to speak in a moderate tone, her voice calm and cold,"Well..you got me. I never really cared about my dress."

Regardless of the fact she was half-starved and bruised, the training she received from the ministry really showed as she kicked out at the knees of the leader, her shotgun pointed at the back of his skull as she shoved his face in the ground, her weight pressing down on his upper arms to keep him down. As the pistols were raised at her back and at Phineas she really regretted her impulses. She remained calm though and leaned down to speak in the leaders ear,"Call them down, or I might just have to dye my bloomers red."

He spit into the sand,"BRITISH WHORE.."

She shot the sand beside him, silencing him,"Tell them to calm down and hand over there weapons or I swear to Allah, I will kill you."

He grunted, trying to push her off which only made Eliza press the gun harder against his occipital bone. After a few minutes he spoke in Lybian and the men dropped their weapons. She looked up at Phineas with an expression of regret, her head motioning to the weapons as she, kept her hand trained on the leaders head. Robbery and blackmail has always been a last resort option, and she could admit that perhaps her thinking was clouded due to the fact that she was heavily wounded, dehydrated and hungry, but it was too late now, for regrets. She turned to Phineas,"Do you know how to drive that contraption?"

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