Half Pint
Elmyra
Snowdrops
BlazingBark
BrokenPromise
rabidbacon
Tlaloc
Chronic
Lildear18
Lugubrious
Although much of Pax Septimus had been affected by the Diver’s attack, for the most part, the city’s historic district had emerged relatively unscathed. Whether this was due to some form of mystical protection, the Diver’s appreciation of Art Deco architecture, or pure coincidence was anyone’s guess, but it meant that the district’s various businesses and learning institutions continued to operate as if the recent, large-scale disaster hadn’t even taken place. Such was the case for the city’s historic library. An imposing, monolithic structure, it boasted several floors filled with books of all kinds, and even a basement archive that, rumor had it, not only connected to the catacombs below the city, but was also the home to several ghosts. Olivia Bell hadn’t seen any of them on her first visit to the library, but that was before she’d found a helpful guide who knew all the so-called “city of blood’s” myriad secrets. Thus, a return trip was most definitely in order, and so the bespectacled young woman found herself sitting on the ornate edifice’s massive steps, enjoying the crisp autumn afternoon weather as she waited for said guide to arrive.
And even if he still kinda felt like crap, Finn wasn’t going to just ghost her like that. Besides, spending some time with his new acquaintance might help take his mind off things! After a few moments the boy soon emerged from down the street, jogging over once he recognized Olivia. ”Sorry if I’m late!” He called out.
“Hi, Finn!” Olivia called back, her nasally voice filled with delight as she smiled and waved enthusiastically at the approaching young man. “And don’t worry!” she hastened to reassure him. “You’re right on time! Besides, it’s such a beautiful day, so I don’t mind sitting out here in the slightest!” she added with a giggle/snort. “The head librarian said she would be happy to give us a tour, but I told her that she didn’t have to trouble herself because I had a super knowledgeable guide of my own!” the bespectacled brunette explained, jumping to her feet and holding both hands out towards Finn. “Plus,” she added, leaning close and lowering her voice to a conspiratorial whisper (which, for Olivia, was about normal speaking volume). “I wanna try and sneak into the catacombs via the basement archives, since that’s where all the ghosts are supposed to be!”
The catacombs? Finn might’ve been around the block to memorize every nook and cranny possible, but he had never considered going underground. Even if they manage to sneak down there, it’d be unfamiliar territory from then onward. ”Ghosts huh? So, where’d you learn about that? The entrypoint through the library I mean.” He asked, walking up the steps to the front door.
“I read about it in one of the books I found at Mr. Torvald’s shop!” Olivia replied with an enthusiastic smile. “The head librarian also confirmed the rumors about the archives possibly being haunted when I asked her about it the first time I came here,” she added.
”Oh.” Torvald’s. Then this is going to be quite interesting. ”Then again you can argue that the librarian perpetuates the rumor to keep people coming back in hopes to catch any sign of hauntings during their stay. A lot of people like to claim things are paranormal when half the time they have a logical explanation for a lot of things, like UFO sightings for example. Who says that alien spaceship isn’t some sort of balloon some kid lost flying in the clouds? Who says those lights aren't some sort of commercial airplane making late night rounds instead of a squadron of space invaders?” Finn went on to ramble as he got the door for her. ”Yeah comparing alien sightings and paranormal activity are akin to comparing apples to oranges but it’s not like there’s any spike of dumbfuck teenagers carelessly opening portals to hell with a ouija board they stole from some shady alleyway trash dump recently. I hope.” He grimaced. He’s had more than enough demons this past week.
“Perhaps not,” a refined voice observed, its tone polite, yet still containing an unmistakable iciness. “But several adolescent hoodlums have nonetheless been causing no small amount of trouble by purposely misplacing manuscripts, speaking at an excessive volume, and using exceedingly vulgar language.” Finn would quickly discover that the voice belonged to a tall, bespectacled woman with light brown hair worn in a ponytail, and garbed in a rather antiquated ensemble, one which gave the impression that she had just stepped out of the early 1900s. “I trust, young man,” the woman continued pointedly. “That you will not deign to be counted among them.”
”Eek!” Finn flinched at the sudden voice and presence that could only belong to the head librarian. He shrank back, instinctively adjusting himself accordingly. ”R-Right then ma’am, sorry!” He slightly bowed. Both in a formal greeting and to indicate that he understood.
“Apology accepted,” the woman replied with a slight smirk, before turning her attention to his companion. “Ah, Olivia. Am I to take it that this is the guide you mentioned earlier?” she inquired, gesturing to Finn.
“Yes, that’s right!” Olivia confirmed with an enthusiastic nod, doing her best to keep her voice at a respectful volume. “His name is Finn. And Finn, this is the head librarian,” she introduced, gesturing to the woman.
“Eleanora Everly, at your service,” the woman greeted with a polite smile, while holding out her hand to the boy.
”Nice to meet you.” The boy shook her hand, as was expected.
“It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, young man,” she continued. “Olivia here has spoken quite highly of you.”
”R-Really? Honestly, I don’t think I’m that worth the praise, researching stuff like this is just a s-sort of a side hobby of mine.” Finn nervously chuckled.
Facing it as Timekeeper was a different story…
“Awww…! Don’t be so modest!” Olivia told him with one of her trademark giggle/snorts. “You told me you have one of those super cool conspiracy boards at home and everything! So, obviously you’re knowledgeable about this stuff, and you were also nice enough to help me when most people would’ve just called me a freak and told me to go away!”
Finn sheepishly scratched at his cheek. ”I suppose I do get a bit too into it sometimes…”
“In any case, I hope you both enjoy your time here,” Eleanora told them with a gentle smile. “And please do your best to keep your voices at a respectful volume.”
“Don’t worry, we will!” Olivia assured the head librarian, before taking her guide’s hand. “Come on Finn!”
”O-Okay!”
With Olivia leading the way, Finn was guided through the library’s multi-leveled central atrium, the maze of shelves beyond, and finally, to the staircase leading down to the basement archives. He tried to provide commentary as best as he could with his limited knowledge, but for the most part this ended up with him going on another ramble about something entirely unrelated to the library. “Do you come here often, Finn?” Olivia inquired as she dragged the young agent along. “I just love libraries! Back home, I used to spend most of my time in an especially charming one,” the bespectacled brunette continued. “It was quite large, but nowhere near as big as this one! But it’s where I first met my darling Xolys, so it will always have a special place in my heart!”
”Uhm, yeah, sometimes.” Finn nodded. ”U-Usually when I wanna go somewhere less…much. Being out in the city alone can get pretty overwhelming for me sometimes, so it’s good to have places like this I can retreat to.” A light shrug. ”...Sooo, there any way I can meet this Xolys fella?” He couldn’t help asking out of curiosity.
“Well, I’d love to introduce you to him, but for some strange reason, people seem to get really frightened by him, so he said it would probably be for the best if he didn’t appear in public,” Olivia replied. “Unless, of course, I was in danger,” she hastened to add. “Plus, I have to be transformed, too, and that’s kinda supposed to be a secret, but you said you deal with supernatural stuff all the time, so, um, maybe once we enter the catacombs it would be okay?” the bespectacled brunette rambled, seemingly just thinking out loud.
Frightened? Finn’s brows rose when she mentioned how other people reacted to the presence of her companion. He glanced around to see if anyone else was in their vicinity. Can’t have anyone catching them sneaking downstairs. And something about having to be transformed. Was she actually an esper too? ”Well I mean, I’m sure he’s not as scary as people make him out to be. But why do you need to transform in order for him to appear? Does it work as a sort of conduit to summon him? Is he a part of your esper form?” He asked, stepping downstairs first.
“Yes, in a manner of speaking,” Olivia confirmed as she followed Finn down. “Although I’m not actually an esper,” she clarified, lowering her voice to the quietest she’d yet been. “I’m a magical girl.”
A. What.
The boy blinked at the distinction. ”Wh-What’s the difference?” Maybe she was just ribbing him? Or calling herself a magical girl was part of her act? Or she was a Chuuni?
“Well, I don’t actually know very much about espers,” Olivia confessed. “Although from what little I’ve heard, they do sound somewhat similar. But magical girls get their powers from mystical storybooks called grimoires, and I would imagine, based on the name, that espers’ powers are psionic in nature, correct?” she inquired, her voice taking on an exceptionally eager tone. “Oh gosh, do you happen to know any espers, Finn?! My neighbor says they can be dangerous, but I’ve really been wanting to learn more about them ever since I heard they exist!”
”Erm, more or less.” He shrugged with a faint grimace. ”F-From your description of…magical girls…they function similarly to espers. Except their grimoires can be anything. Like a pocket watch for example.” Finn would go on to explain how espers worked to the best of his ability. Though he did stumble on his words once or twice because the whole deal with them was complex enough, but hopefully Olivia would be able to get the gist of it?
”Or uh, well, it might be better to just demonstrate.” The boy grabbed his grimoire from his pocket and transformed into the Timekeeper on the spot.
”...Yep.” The mechanical esper awkwardly rocked back and forth on his heels as he tried to measure out Olivia’s reaction.
“Oh gosh!” Olivia exclaimed, her wide eyes gleaming with excitement. “You’re an esper, Finn?! That’s so absolutely wonderful!” By this point, they had reached the archives, and the bespectacled brunette wasted no time in darting around to look her guide over from all angles. “You know, we don’t have magical boys where I come from, so seeing one transform up close is really extraordinary! What kinds of things can you do?! I just love your steampunk aesthetic! Oh, wow!” she added in amazement as she noticed the artificial-looking joint on the young agent’s neck (having throughly invaded his personal space in her unbridled glee). “Are you some kind of cyborg?! Or perhaps a mannequin?! If I didn’t know any better, I’d say your grimoire was Pinocchio!” she declared with a giggle/snort. “Or maybe a steampunk-style alter,” she noted thoughtfully as she continued her rambles. “Oh! You probably don’t know anything about them! You see, alters are grimoires that tell a version of their story that’s been modified from the original in some way,” the babbling brunette explained. “For example, my grimoire is an alter of Beauty and The Beast!” In the time it took Finn to blink, Olivia had produced an ornate, hardcover book, upon which several dozen shimmering blue jewels formed the image of a rose. “My friend Chinami says that girls with altered grimoires are often picked on and treated as outcasts, but everyone at Marrywell Academy has treated me with nothing but kindness since my first day there! Which was really nice, since I’ve always been treated as an outcast everywhere else long before I ever became a magical girl.”
It took Finn a few seconds to process the sudden excitement and deluge of information from the bespectacled girl, akin to a computer taking a moment to load up a file. He blinked in dumbfoundment before speaking up once more,
”I-I guess that’s fair.” The way he was built did make him look like a puppet of sorts. He tilted his head at the book. ”So your grimoires all take the forms of storybooks, with some having the rare chance of being alternate retellings. There a power scale to it? Like do written mythos have more power than your typical fairytale? How different do these ‘alters’ have to be to be formally classified as such?” The mechanical esper went on to ask.
“Well, from what I’ve been told, any story that’s a deviation from the original is considered an alter,” Olivia replied. “As for power levels, there are three, based on how old a story is and its global impact. First are fables, then legends (which is what my grimoire is classed as), and finally myths, which are kinda rare. Of course, I didn’t learn any of that until I started attending Marrywell,” she added. “But what about you, Finn?” she asked, leaning in close to the young agent, her eyes seeming to sparkle. “What kind of abilities do you have, and how did you become an esper? Were you just born as one?”
”Espers aren’t really born. Their grimoires choose the wielders. You can argue the possibility of bloodlines being naturally compatible with them but no one really knows.” He began walking again, looking for the entrance to the catacombs. ”An esper’s magic follows the theme of their glamor, and their element. Mine’s lightning, and as you can probably guess…” Finn motions over himself. ”My kit revolves around time itself. The notes I use lean more towards supportive melodies- Uhm. Think of it like weaving a spell, but these days it feels like I’m…” The boy trailed off, his expression twisting to a frown. ”It’s like I’m more made to hurt people. And I hate it. It- It really sucks.” He shook his head in disdain.
“Y-You’re forced to hurt people…?” Olivia asked hesitantly, her once eager smile dissolving into a confused (and concerned) frown. “I thought espers fought monsters, just like magical girls do. U-Um, so, does that mean your grimoire controls what you do? Is it what makes you hurt people?”
Finn quickly shook his head. ”Nonono, I’m not saying I’m forced to! A-At least I don’t think… It just feels like I haven’t had the best luck since starting out, y’know?” He clarified. ”Espers do fight monsters too but sometimes we have to fight people, magi, other espers, it’s all a bit too complicated to explain in one sitting. Just know a lot of espers have differences in ideologies and goals?” They’re all human at the end of the day, after all.
“I think I understand,” Olivia replied. “Back at school, there was a magical girl who could control monsters called Pageless and used them to attack some students. She had good intentions, but she still went about things the wrong way,” the bespectacled brunette explained. “Hurting innocent people, even if it’s to free them from some perceived captivity, is never right. That’s why we had to fight her, but, even so, I’m still willing to forgive her,” the nerdy girl added with a smile. “And I still hope that, someday, we can work together as friends!”
Glad at least one of us can still be hopeful.
Finn nodded with a faint smile. ”Though, bit of warning, it’d most likely take something drastic against her in order for her to see that her methods were in the wrong. I get not wanting to hurt her, using a more pacifistic approach, but some people just need a good smackdown in order to get their heads straight.”
“I guess you’re probably right about that…” Olivia conceded. “A-Anyways, it looks like we got a bit distracted,” the bespectacled brunette noted as she looked around the musty, dimly-lit archives. “Um, I think the book said there was a hidden passage behind that shelf there,” she added, pointing to a long shelf along the far back wall.
Finn walked over to the shelf and scanned over the books, occasionally pulling a few down to see if it was your typical secret-lever-disguised-as-a-book door.
Olivia giggle/snorted as she watched Finn search for some sort of concealed mechanism on the shelf itself, before stepping over to the young agent. “Um, I think we have to move it,” she advised. “The entrance is probably built into the wall itself.”
The boy stepped back with a huff. ”Figures. Right!” He stepped to the side of the shelf and began to push it away from the wall.
Once the shelf was out of the way, a faint rectangular outline could be discerned on the brick wall behind it. This was clearly the entrance to the catacombs. “Oh wow!” Olivia exclaimed in delight. “It’s just like the book said!” Rushing over to the secret door, she began examining it closely. “Hmmm… I wonder how it opens…”
Finn tilted his head in thought. ”There a secret button? Is the wall weak? I could try and break it open while I’m still…y’know.” He glanced down at himself, it had only occurred to him that he was still in esper form. But hey, might as well make the most of it, he’d need to keep Olivia safe once they reached the catacombs anyways.
“Maybe one of the bricks needs to be pressed in,” Olivia suggested. “Let’s see if there’s one with some distinctive markings on it.”
”Secret button then. Let’s see…” The timekeeper stepped up next to her and began feeling around the wall for any loose bricks.
Soon enough, Finn came upon a brick that sunk into the wall at his touch, causing the rectangular outline to depress with a burst of dust and swing open, revealing a stone staircase leading into the darkened depths beyond.
“You did it, Finn!” Olivia cheered. “Oh gosh! This is just like Indiana Jones!” she added with a giggle/snort. “Did you bring a flashlight with you?” she inquired as she peered into the darkness. “I brought one of my own, but it’s still nice to have a backup, just in case. I mean, I guess I could always transform and have Xolys illuminate things with his eldritch flames, but it doesn’t look like there’s too much space down there, and I wouldn’t want him to get stuck. Plus, he might scare the ghosts away! Wouldn’t that be awful?!”
”uh…yeah. I don’t have a flashlight flashlight, but my phone does.” The boy searched his pockets and pulled out the aforementioned device. ”Shall we then?”
“Yes, let’s!” Olivia agreed with an enthusiastic nod. “You know, this is almost as exciting as the slumber party we had in my school’s haunted music room!” she added with a giggle/snort as she started down the steps.
Haunted music room. Huh. ”Your uh, school sounds interesting…” Finn aimed his phone flashlight down the steps into unfamiliar territory. He was a bit tense, if he was being honest. But it should be fine.
Should.
“Oh, yes!” Olivia told him, her nasally voice filled with delight. “It’s a wonderful school! The teachers are so knowledgeable and kind! Well, Miss Valeria is sort of rough around the edges, but she’s still very encouraging! And I met so many wonderful friends there! Like my roommate, Suzuya, and Bonnie, who helped me organize the sleepover! Oh! And the sleepover itself was super fun!” she continued to happily babble away as they descended the steps. “Since it was October, we decided to make it a Halloween party, and some of the teachers and students actually wore costumes! Even Xolys dressed up as a bedsheet ghost so he wouldn’t scare away the actual ghosts!” she added with a giggle/snort. “But the very best part was how, when we got to the music room, it had transformed into a gothic castle! It was absolutely incredible, and I had so much fun exploring it! Did you do anything fun for Halloween, Finn?”
The boy hummed in thought. ”Think me and a few friends from school had a movie night last Halloween? Was pretty easy getting enough candy for all of us.” He shrugged. ”Horror movies don’t really phase me that much, to be honest.”
“They don’t really bother me very much either,” Olivia replied. “I usually find the parts other people are bothered by really interesting, which is probably why everyone at my old school always called me a freak and told me I belonged in a mental institution. I mean, there is this one that’s supposed to be haunted, but there’s no guarantee that’s the one my parents would have sent me to,” she continued. “And the rumor that it was haunted might not even have been true! Like with the Marrywell music room. Even though it was mysteriously turned into a beautiful castle, I didn’t get to see even a single ghost! Although, after the party, while darling Xolys and I were walking down one of the corridors, we met the most adorable little…”
Hello, Finn, a new voice spoke up. I’m pretty sure Olivia here is going to keep rambling for about… I’d say fifteen minutes at least, which should give us plenty of time to have a little chat. Oh, and try not to freak out, but only you can hear me. I know hearing voices might be a little strange… well, maybe not so much in your case, but we wouldn’t want Olivia to think you’re completely nuts. Of course, I could chat with her, too, but if I went around popping into the brains of everyone and their dog, it would cause some pretty MAJOR problems. So, for now, it’s just you and me, having a nice little chat in the cozy confines of your little mind, not unlike the stroll you’re taking through these utterly isolated and charmingly claustrophobic catacombs. Uh, you didn’t happen to annoy Olivia before coming down here, did you? Otherwise she might decide to stage an impromptu reenactment of ‘The Cask of Amontillado’. The voice was silent for a moment. That was a joke. Anyways, as for who I am, let’s just say I’m a friendly ghost, but my name’s not Casper, or Oliver, for that matter. I mean, I’d love to just come right out and tell you exactly who I am, but I think it’s best if we preserve a sense of mystery here. Although I will say that, while my voice might possibly be mistaken for that of a prepubescent boy, such as yourself, I am, in fact, a woman, albeit one who has absolutely zero interest in joining that ridiculous little harem of yours, so don’t get any stupid ideas. That said, you don’t need to worry, Finn. I’m here to help you. I’ve been following your exploits for quite some time, and recently, I’ve noticed that you’re starting to resemble someone I REALLY can’t stand, so I thought I would step in to make a slight course correction. Full disclosure, I wasn’t initially planning on having this little intervention, and the mere fact I’m even talking to you right now is breaking some pretty massive rules, but desperate times call for desperate measures and I’ve always made it a point to give rules a middle finger whenever I possibly can. Look, I know you have problems, Finn, but closing yourself off isn’t going to make them disappear, and neither is getting ‘psychiatric aid’ from a perverted lunatic who runs around with buttered toast hanging out of their fucking mouth like some shitty anime character. However, unlike her, I actually am a doctor, and I actually want to help you. So just relax, and if all goes well, you’ll end up in a much better state than when you came down here, plus you’ll have a cool ghost story to tell Olivia. Okay? Oh, and, uh, just ‘think’ your responses. Otherwise things’ll get really awkward really fast.
What the fuck.
Frankly I’m not sure if I can trust a voice in my head after the Dante shit left me second guessing myself by the hour. Finn furrowed his brows. The voice could swear he mentally sighed. But then again, my job’s on the line, and my team probably hates my guts right now. I fear your worst might be better than the alternative at the rate I’m going. …Also what do you mean harem?!
It was mostly a joke, the voice replied. But I’m sure you haven’t failed to notice how girls seem to be drawn to you like moths to the proverbial flame, and not just in the romantic sense, either. For some reason, they like you, Finn. They’re concerned about you, and do you know why that is? Do you know why Mary and Betty are so obsessed with you? Why Klava and Ashley both wanted to fill the void left by your too-busy-to-give-a-fuck actual older sibling? Why Olivia made you her tour guide? Why Oros calls you Penny Jr.? It’s because, despite being a perpetual fuck up, you’re important. You matter. You have a unique, almost imperceptible, but still undeniable charisma, even if it’s only because you’re seen as cute, non-threatening, pitiful, or maybe even as having some hidden potential (which you actually do have, by the way). And that’s a good thing, Finn. A very good thing. It’s certainly not something you should be afraid of, or try to resist, even if it’ll bring a little discomfort along the way. Which is why I’m so glad to hear that you’re willing to have this little therapy session. If Ashley’s any indication, it’ll do wonders.
Finn subtly nodded along to the infodump, even if he felt slightly uncomfortable with how much she knew of him. Spine-chilling, considering the last time. But things that hadn’t even crossed his mind before. If I’m so important, why is my luck so shit then? …Hm, unless there’s some sort of penance effect going on here. A price paid for advantage elsewhere. Popularity draws in unsavory sorts, power brings about instability, love from others… He frowned. All eyes on you, watching your next move, ready to abandon you once you’ve gone against their perceptions. Right?
Wow, you sure are quite the pessimist, the voice snarked. Looks like you needed this chat even more than I thought. The fact is, Finn, someone in your situation is always going to face adversity, but it’s up to you if you’re going to put forth the effort needed to overcome it. Plus, if you’re creative, you can put your suffering to good use. Life is pain, Finn. The lives of the truly exceptional even more so. I may only feel physical pain exceedingly rarely, but I experience emotional pain more often than I’d like to think about. For example, I recently offered to help a certain someone, offered to bestow upon them all sorts of amazing gifts, only for them to turn around and SPIT IN MY FUCKING FACE!!! I don’t have to worry about you doing that to me, do I, Finn? For your sake, I sure hope not. Anyways, the point is everyone feels disappointment. Everyone feels pain. It’s what they do with it that matters. Look at Ashley. I gave her one of these pep talks a while back, too. Remember when you raided Justin’s mansion and brainwashed Betty kicked your whiny ass? I do. In fact, I replay that scene when I’m feeling particularly depressed and need something to laugh at, like when that individual I mentioned COMPLETELY FUCKED OVER ALL MY GLORIOUS PLANS FOR HIM!!!
The voice paused for a moment to catch her breath.
Ahem. As I was saying, while you were reduced to a mangled, sobbing mess in that corridor, pathetically pleading for Betty to come back, Ashley was having a bit of a breakdown of her own. She’d just escaped Justin’s literal shit hole of a dungeon, where he keeps all his cannon fodder thralls, innocent victims she had to kill her way through, only to find out that every last one of the hostages she’d been trying to save back at the entrance hall had all been slaughtered. I think we can both agree that was way worse than what you went through. In fact, it was enough to make her question why she was even granted the powers of an esper in the first place. Which was when I decided to intervene. And now look at her! Yes, she’s felt despair and heartache since then, but she’s always pushed through it! Even with all the crap she went on to endure, she never needed someone to hold her hand and help her through it. She was able to manage on her own. Meanwhile, what’s the first thing you do when things get a little too stressful? ‘Oh Betty! Please hold me and have ice cream with me so I can forget about the teammates I just abandoned and all the people I just murdered like a total fucking psychopath!’ Do you see the difference? You mustn’t run away from your problems, Finn. You need to stand up to them and kick ‘em in the balls! As I told Ashley, life may be pain, but pain is weakness leaving the body. Embrace the pain, Finn, use it to make yourself stronger. You want to be stronger, don’t you? Of course you do. You want people to stop seeing you as the pathetic little kid who always fucks everything up and then runs off and cries about it. That’s a very admirable goal to work towards, and one you’re fully capable of achieving. That said, the choice ultimately lies with you, so what’s it gonna be, Finn? Do you wanna actually learn from your mistakes, or are you just gonna keep repeating them?
Depends, are you ACTUALLY trying to help me or are you trying to kick me down and spit in my face? Finn bit back at the voice becoming more hostile in her words, her admittance in finding sadistic glee in a moment he was most powerless, and the weird grudge against this someone. Something in the back of the boy’s mind was trying to crawl its way back to the surface and between it and the tripe from this twat, it was giving him quite the headache.
One: I wasn’t being pessimistic, I was being realistic. Have you ever heard or seen how quickly people abandon ship and distance themselves from famous celebrities, creators, and social media influencers whenever they catch wind that the famous person isn’t as flawless as they make themselves out to be? Or whatever the fans led themselves to think? Not to mention some celebrities are actually vile as fuck outside of the view of their audience but there’s always people that don’t give a shit either way about who someone is outside of their ideal of who they are. As long as that ideal isn’t shattered, no one really cares about the real them. Get put in the spotlight and you’re expected to give a damn good show. He never understood why he became so popular. Two: Just because pain is expected doesn’t mean it’d magically hurt any less when it happens, so how the fuck am I supposed to use it to my advantage, hm? Yeah, I know, I need to get a proper therapist that doesn’t try to ask for my sister’s phone number and all that at some point but do you got any bippity-boppity-bullshit you can pull since you apparently know so much about me and Ashley apparently? I didn’t even know she had to go through all that… It was like the universe was telling him to just shut up and bear it. Three: Leave Betty out of this. Christ alive, our popularity and Oros sparing me just cause I agreed to TRY and see if we’re compatible is bullshit enough, this is just getting ridiculous. Four: It sounds like you’re only doing this just so that you can get back at whoever-the-fuck apparently hurt you that badly, Finn sharply took a deep breath, despite not speaking out loud.
And lastly: If I’m such a irredeemable psychopath, why should I care about what any of you think, Doc? You could easily just focus on Ashley instead of bothering with such a perpetual failure.
The boy’s eyes suddenly widened, as if he’d struck an epiphany. Why should he care about what anyone thinks?
That’s an excellent question, Finn, the voice replied, sounding quite pleased with how things were proceeding, despite the young agent’s little outburst. In fact, that whole pissed off rant of yours shows that we’re making some real progress here. I mean, I would have been pretty disappointed if all you did was nod along and passively acquiesce to everything I was saying like some mindlessly obedient child. But instead, you’re actually getting defensive! You’re standing up for yourself, facing a challenge head on! Well done, Finn! the voice commended. This is exactly what I’ve been talking about. And since you made the effort to organize your points so neatly, I’ll address each in turn. But before we get to that, I’d like to answer your first question. Yes, Finn, I actually do want to help you, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to coddle you. You don’t want to be coddled, do you Finn?
I want you to be honest.
Well, lucky for you, I am being honest, the voice told him. Now back to those points you raised… First, almost everyone I’ve ever met is less intelligent than I am by several orders of magnitude, so I couldn’t really give a single fuck what they think, and you shouldn’t care, either. That said, not everyone will be so quick to turn against you. Like I said earlier, there are plenty of people who genuinely care about you, and the fact that they don’t always pander to you like some fragile little baby is actually a good thing. But we’ll talk about that some more in a bit. Next, I’d like to correct a little misapprehension you seem to have. I never said you’d hurt any less, I said to use that hurt as a power source, as fuel. Turn that pain, that anger, into strength. You’re actually doing it right now. Clearly I struck a nerve, but instead of wallowing in self pity, you struck back at me! That’s great, Finn! It means there’s still hope for you. And I’ve got a LOT of ‘bippity-boppity-bullshit’ I can give you, but for now, all you’re getting is this chat, and, with any luck, it should be all the help you’ll need. But only if you agree to cooperate. I brought up Betty because she’s inextricably linked to your current situation. Your desire to save her, to defend her even now, is the source of a great deal of your motivation, so you better bet your ass I’m going to address it. And let’s get another thing straight, the voice went on. I’m not doing this to get back at that sorry piece of shit I mentioned earlier, I’m doing this to ensure you don’t become him! He was a total disappointment right to the very end, but you don’t have to be! You’re not irredeemable, Finn. If you were, I wouldn’t even be talking with you right now. Like I already mentioned, Ashley doesn’t need my help anymore, but you do. And I believe you can be helped, but only if you want to be. It’s like you just realized, you shouldn’t care what anyone else thinks. It’s what you want that matters. This is something you need to do for yourself, Finn. So, do you want to be helped, or not?”
If you’re not gonna turn-tail and try to kill me too, then knock yourself out. If they were talking in person he would’ve shrugged.
Excellent. In that case, let’s begin with your recent debacle at the diner. Tell me, why do you think things went as poorly as they did?
Finn mentally groaned. Are you gonna rehash that I disobeyed Ashley’s orders and caused a chain reaction that resulted in everything going up in blood, fire, and smoke? That I shouldn’t have expected either her or Estelle to work with me because neither of them want to work with such a loose cannon? Or are you going to mention that I put too much faith in Dante actually being willing to listen when most of these fuckwits I’ve faced so far have only looked out for themselves? I followed Dr. Moller’s orders to kill on sight, and yet SHE gets a quick promotion to second-in-command for doing nothing but being a punching bag? What a blatant ‘fuck you!’. She could hear a bitting, sarcastic laugh afterwards. And before you mention it, I know, I also fucked up by running off too. But that’s ‘cause I didn’t want to kill Amanda either. I didn’t know she was real.
He went silent for a moment.
... Perhaps I should’ve. You know, catch her in the moment of weakness? But I honestly think my co-workers would’ve frowned upon that too. Can’t win with them. That line of thought only served to further his epiphany.
You certainly have one hell of a victim complex, huh? the voice noted with what seemed to be a mocking smirk. The truth is, Finn, while this universe may treat you as its personal punching bag, not everyone is out to get you. Let’s address your various complaints one at a time. Yes, you disobeyed orders and caused everything to go to hell, but it seems you fully understand that, and are fully prepared to take responsibility for that particular fuckup, which is very commendable. I think your biggest problem is the second point you brought up, the whole, ‘nobody wants to help me’ bit. You see, Finn, contrary to what you might think, the reason your teammates didn’t come rushing to your aid was because they were dealing with their own issues. If you’ll recall, there were only three of you against roughly twice that many adversaries. And do you remember why that combat began in the first place? It was because you decided to play the hero and order your fellow agents, including your immediate superior, to save a group of schoolgirls. It might interest you to know that Ashley and Estelle were in the middle of actually doing that when you were mentally whining about how they had ‘abandoned you’. Oh, and they did their fair share of killing, too. In fact, Ashley took out almost as many hostiles as you did. The only reason she decided to be a ‘punching bag’ for so long was to give the defenseless civilians that you wanted to save time to get out of the building! As for Dante, why would he be willing to listen when you barged into his diner and acted so aggressively? You threatened him, Finn. How else was he supposed to act? If you’d gone around the back like Ashley suggested, maybe things wouldn’t have escalated quite so quickly. Instead, you walked right into a fucking powder keg. Of course it was gonna become a clusterfuck. Finally, it’s just a hypothesis, but maybe Moller promoted Ashley because she not only followed orders, but also stuck around to deal with the repercussions of doing so. I’m pretty sure she didn’t want to use lethal force on Amanda either, but she didn’t have much choice. It might have been hard for her, scratch that, it was hard for her, but she still did what had to be done and took responsibility for her actions.
The voice took a deep breath before exhaling it in a weary sigh.
Look, Finn. The real problem isn’t that you fucked up, it’s that you didn’t own up to it. You want to be the badass hero who calls the shots? Fine. But then don’t complain when you come face to face with all the hardships that role entails. I mean, it would have been one thing if you had said ‘I’ll handle Dante, you rescue the girls!’, but all you did was complain that no one was rushing to hold your hand when the Big Bad came after you. So here’s my next question- what do you wanna be, Finn? The whiny little kid who falls apart when things get too tough, or the epic hero who takes one look at adversity and kicks it in the nuts?
Oh if only she could see the look on his face. It took some considerable willpower to draw back the anger this “voice” was feeding. Dickhead. The reason WHY I complained so much was cause I realized I was at a major disadvantage against Dante and expected my T E A M to actually coordinate and back each other up, you know, act like an actual T E A M? And, fuck, it’s not even the first time I’d been left alone like that, but hey! AT LEAST BETTY WAS A H U M A N! If Finn was facing the source of the voice he’d most likely attempt to behead her by now, wouldn’t he?
Undoubtedly.
I was even considering offering to step away willingly and help out around the workplace in a way asides active fieldwork, but now I’m starting to think I should cut my damn losses and get out while I still can, since apparently I can’t be assed to work in a pathetic excuse of a T E A M, why NOT go back to flying solo if I’m so apparently powerful enough to do so?
So to answer your second question, Doc, I don’t necessarily see a point in being an epic hero like I’ve for some reason became in the public’s eyes. I’m just trying to do my job.
I was afraid we might reach this little impasse, the voice said with a disappointed sigh. Sometimes, a team has to delegate responsibility. Did you want them to just abandon the helpless schoolgirls, Finn? Was their safety not more important than your own? You seemed to think so when you ran off all hot headed to try and rescue them in the first place, the voice noted pointedly. Anyway, if you truly just want to ‘do your job’ like a good little secondary character, then I would suggest that you actually be a team player yourself, instead of trying to steal the spotlight at the first opportunity. In case you didn’t notice, your teammates were trying to help you by getting answers about your little ‘condition’ in the least problematic way possible. But you’re right. If you want to be a moody brat who just does whatever he feels like, then you should probably just go back to being a freelancer. After all, you only joined G.E.M.I.N.I. to save Betty, right? Well, she’s safe now, mission accomplished, so why keep hanging around with people you obviously can’t stand?
The wryest of smiles formed on the boy’s face.
Why indeed.
That was a genuine question, Finn, the voice deadpanned.
And you think I actually have an answer…? He internally deflated. I guess I had high hopes for this job at first? But then Miss Fang died, then Miss Leroux and Mr. Howard got redeployed elsewhere, and now this. Feels like people everywhere are abandoning ship, from what I hear. More freelancers than otherwise these days. Finn couldn’t really say if that was a good thing, even they were strained due to dark web espers. Is it really gonna be worth grinning and bearing this shit, Doc?
Yes, it will, because you have the power to make a difference, even more so than my dear Ashley, but only if you stop moping around and murder this little victim complex of yours like you murder everything else that stands in your way! This isn’t the time for weakness, Finn! Major events have been set into motion, and you need to face them head on! Own up to your full potential, and you can be the greatest esper in this city! Or, you can go back to your old life, the meaningless life of a powerless child. Fuck quitting G.E.M.I.N.I., you can quit being an esper entirely! Just throw your grimoire and that other super mysterious pocket watch what’s-her-smug-face gave you down the nearest storm drain and watch all the big, scary decisions go away with them!
The voice paused for a moment.
Some might say that you’ve been given far too much responsibility for someone so young, that you’d be crazy to keep doing this, and that the only sane course of action is to walk away from this shitstorm as fast as possible. Are they right, Finn? Do you really believe that being an esper is too much for you to handle?
There’s only one logical conclusion from this conversation either way, is there? After a pause from his end, he “spoke” again: I’ll humor your and everyone else’s…assumptions of me for now, but I’m not gonna play into the good boy act while I do it.
And what, exactly, do you mean by that, Finn?
You know for someone who claims her intellect is above all, you’re really slow on the uptake. I meant if people wanna see me as a killer, I might as well embrace it.
I simply wanted to clarify, the voice replied. And that’s good, Finn. Fully embracing the identity you wish to create for yourself is one of the core lessons I’ve been trying to get you to take to heart. And speaking of clarifying, I want to make sure you fully understand what that entails.
Not really one he wished to create for himself, only what always came natural. Of course I do.
Then tell me, Finn, what have you learned from our little chat?
Embrace the hand I’ve been dealt?
In a manner of speaking, the voice conceded. But instead of just passively resigning yourself to it, you need to actively use everything that comes your way as material with which to build the future you want, and you can only do that if you have a clear goal in mind. So, what is your goal, Finn? What do you actually want to achieve by being an esper?
Finn blinked. I…actually don’t know. I’ve not really had a goal in mind besides protecting Betty. He admitted.
Well, my advice is to get one. Sooner, rather than later. Otherwise, you’re still that confused, lost child you hate people viewing you as.
Right.
(sigh) Y’know, I really wanted to believe that this little chat of ours was going to have a bit more substantial of an effect on your mental state moving forward, but I suppose that was never going to be the case. For what it’s worth, I really do hope you’ll take what I’ve told you to heart and actually succeed where that other fuck up I mentioned utterly failed, but I guess we’ll just have to wait and see, won’t we?
Wow, aren't you a ray of sunshine? I’m not just gonna suddenly know what my purpose is or whatever. I think as I work, go with the flow, all that stuff. You can say this little conversation of ours is a good nudge into one direction, but I hope you don’t expect any credit or anything. Whatever happens, happens. If I get hit with an epiphany, I’ll fax you or…however this works. Finn “spoke” up.
So yeah, wait and see.
And, after another moment,
I’m sorry I hurt you.
There was a period of silence, broken only by the background noise of Olivia’s continued ramblings, and then…
Apology accepted, the voice replied. Although, if you really wanna make it up to me, you’ll prove that our little chat wasn’t a colossal waste of time and actually put the lessons I’ve imparted into practice, like Ashley has done. After all, while I don’t see us ever speaking again, I’m always watching…
“…and then she said that espers were really dangerous,” Olivia was saying. “And she told me I shouldn’t try to find any, despite my interest, but you’re an esper, and you’ve been nothing but the kindest and most helpful person since the moment we met! In fact, I couldn’t imagine you hurting anyone!” she added with a giggle/snort. “You know, we’ve been walking for quite a while now, and we still haven’t run into any ghosts! Do you think we might have taken a wrong turn somewhere?” the bespectacled brunette inquired. “I mean, this place is quite labyrinthian… In fact, I’d be really concerned about being lost down here forever if I didn’t have a guide with me!” she added with another giggle/snort as she gave Finn a big smile. “You probably know these catacombs like the back of your hand!”
”Oh, uhm,” With that out of the way, Finn could finally focus his full attention back to Olivia. ”Actually, this is the first time I’ve ever been down here.” The mechanical esper grimaced. ”I’ve been around the block so many times around the city but I’ve never been underground like…this…” He trailed off, voice growing quieter. He stopped walking.
”We’re- L-Let’s head back before it gets late!” The Timekeeper glanced back at Olivia with concern.
“Oh, gosh! Does something happen if it gets to be a certain time?!” Olivia inquired, her nasally voice filled with a mixture of concern and excited curiosity.
”N-Not really, just- just better safe than sorry-” Finn gently grabbed Olivia’s arm and started walking back from the direction they came from.
“B-But, you’re an esper, right?” Olivia protested. “Wouldn’t you be able to protect us from anything dangerous we might encounter? Since, well, if there is some kind of dangerous creature down here, I’d very much like to see it!” she added eagerly.
Finn sighed. ”Yeah, but I don’t know what’s down here. And frankly I had a long conversation with an annoying ghost that ended up distracting me, so…” He stopped to glance around, trying to remember the path. ”I just- Hopefully we’re not lost??”
Any worry Olivia might have felt about the possibility of Finn not actually being able to get them back to the surface was completely subsumed by the gleeful excitement generated by the prior piece of information the Timekeeper had almost nonchalantly revealed.
“Ohmygoshyouactuallytalkedtoaghost?!” Olivia exclaimed, her words coming out in a lightning-fast torrent as she moved her face to within mere inches of the young esper’s own. “Whatdidtheysoundlike?!Whatdidtheysay?! Wereyouabletoseethem?! Ohgoshthisissoooexciting!”
”S-Slow down!” Finn panicked in response, pausing to catch up to her questions.
”Right, uhm, it was a young girl I think, around our age? Hard to explain what she said cause it ended up turning into a bit of an argument in the middle of it, no I didn’t see her but she talked through some sorta mental link? Psychic? Whatever it was.” He did his best to explain.
“Oh wow! So, did she say if she was actually the spirit of someone who died down here, or if she was just an ectoplasmic entity who was drawn to this location?!” Olivia asked. “Oh, and, um, sorry for getting overexcited, earlier…” she apologized. “I just find this sorta stuff to be absolutely fascinating!”
”Er, guess you can say she was drawn here, yeah.”
“What else did she have to tell you?!” Olivia pressed. “And you said you had an argument with her? What was that about?! Did she come here just to yell at you?! Oh, goodness! Y-You didn’t kill her, did you Finn?!”
The boy chuckled dumbfoundedly. ”If I somehow killed HER? I’d eat my goggles.” He shook his head. ”Don’t worry about it, ‘k?” Finn gave Olivia a crooked smile.
“Oh, okay,” Olivia acquiesced. “I was just beginning to get worried that a vengeful ghost had started haunting you! I’m really glad to hear that isn’t the case,” she added with a relieved smile. “It’s too bad she didn’t want to talk with me though… So, um, anyways, do you really think we should start heading back now? I was hoping we could explore some more…”
Finn shrugged. ”Much luckier than I am in that regards.” The boy glanced around again, thinking. ”Well, if you insist we explore a bit longer we could-” He suddenly cut himself off, eyes glued to the quickest sight of the tail end of a royal blue cape passing by and disappearing behind the corner.
Well. Perhaps they can still catch a ghost! Without thinking much further, he began following the direction of the passing silhouette.
“Huh? Is something wrong?” Olivia asked. “Oh! Did that ghost start talking to you again?!”
”Different ghost!!” He calls back, with a surprisingly excited grin. As if to further his point, the two would hear a giggle echoing through the catacombs; one befitting of a young ghost.
”This way!”
“O-Okay!” Olivia replied as she hurried after him, her own grin having returned in full force. Indeed, the bespectacled brunette couldn’t believe her luck! Maybe she really would get to see an actual ghost after all!
Only time would tell…
