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3 yrs ago
Current Having energy to do anything, seems like an impossible feat.
1 like
3 yrs ago
Anyone waiting on a reply... sorry, not tonight. I'm going to try and drink a bottle of red wine, before I pass out.
3 yrs ago
Anyone interested in FxF roleplays, please pm me! I need more of it in my life!@
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3 yrs ago
I need more FxF role-playing in my life...😏
7 likes
3 yrs ago
Anyone who was Roleplaying with me in the last month, I am back... Please contact me if you wish to Roleplay again! :)
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Most Recent Posts

Amanda did not speak during the meeting, she felt a little out of place still. She listened to the stories, but didn't feel like she related to any of them. She held her coffee and looked down at the brownish liquid, swishing it around the cup as the meeting came to a close. Was her drinking some kind of fast track to self destruction?

She flipped red curls over her shoulder again, surely she could look after herself. She was deep in thought when the woman next to her turned and asked how lost she was. She flashed a bright and practiced smile. "I'm sort of lost, but..." She trailed off, biting her bottom lip she turned her focus to her coffee.

She set her coffee down, and stood from her seat stretching her legs and arms by tip toeing and reaching for the ceiling. "I'm just realizing that I may have lost my path somewhere... Even so, I don't want to put myself in a position of being dependent on someone else." She said with a soft frown.

"I let myself need someone for too long, when all I needed was myself." She said, flopping back down in the seat. "I needed him to the extent of ignoring the signs, problems, and advice of people close to me. It got me hurt, more than a night of jubilation at Dotty's." She laughed, "But on the other hand, I've relied on my co-workers and family relentlessly since leaving him... It's about trusting the right people, and I'm just not sure I trust myself to pick them out." She finished rambling, and turned another smile to Leslie.

"So I'm a bit lost, but I'm not sure alcoholism is the type of lost I am." She said, feeling like she may have just said something insulting. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to down play the seriousness of the condition." She mumbled, turning back to her coffee.
Amanda made her way inside as everyone else did, she saw the snack table and Keurig. Immediately thankful to whoever decided this was a good idea, though it was very crowded at the moment. She chose a seat in the back, which she was sure marked her as a newbie... likely these people knew each other rather well and she would stick out regardless. Her bright yellow dress seemed a little out of place, aswell.

She pulled her ponytail around the the front of her shoulder, She brushed through it with her fingers. She caught the woman approaching out of the corner of her eye, and turned. She was tall, with short hair... A professional of some kind, judging by her outfit. The bruises were a bit concerning, just what had this woman been through.

"I might have stress smoked a little too much before coming here." She said with a bright smile, flipping her hair back over her shoulder. She accepted the coffee, setting it down on the chair beside her... She added some sugar and creamer, "Thanks for bringing to sugar and creamer, I can't stand black coffee." She laughed nervously.

"I'm Amanda." She said softly, taking a sip of her coffee. She didn't know what to say about the help... She didn't feel like she needed help. She didn't want to rely on someone else, or a group of someones, to fix her. "Thanks, I'll keep that in mind." She said softly, looking at the cup. "I just got a little over Zealous, on the anniversary of my divorce."

She fidgeted with the edge of her cups lid, "I made a fool of myself, and that's on me not the drink."
Haha!
I'm basing mine off a mix of Criminal Minds and Brooklyn 99, lmao!
I will post soon, been dying at work.
One Week Later




Amanda was just coming back from a jog, He week had been hectic. Work had picked up for a busy season, and she had taken to working out again. She had went back to Dotty's bar a few days later, but kept herself in check. To be fair, she was smoking a bunch more these days. She apparently had said some embarrassing things the night of her lapse in control. She was actually kind of glad she couldn't remember much about the officer who had taken her in.

She stopped by the mailroom at her apartment, and picked up the stack of mail. "Who even sends mail anymore?" She said with a soft laugh, that quickly faded as she saw the top letter. It was a court order, for some group therapy. She groaned softly, reading that she was expected at her first meeting this afternoon.

She tossed the rest of the letters onto her kitchen table, and started to pull off her workout clothes on the way to the shower. She turned the knob for hot water, "Group therapy... Like it really want to air my dirty laundry to a room of strangers." She sighed softly, letting the warm water relax her tense muscles. She knew that therapy was probably something she should have been going to for awhile, if she had been doing it... maybe she could have even avoided this situation.

After her shower, she dried off slipping on a pair of cotton shorts making her way to the couch. Her hair wrapped up in a towel, and not bothering with a shirt. She flopped down onto the couch, she fished the bag from the drawer. She was glad she kept these pre-rolls handy.

An hour or so later, and two finished blunts in her ashtray... she stood from the couch, "What does one even wear to group therapy?" She asked with a chuckle. She still wasn't happy about having to go, but she was at least in a better mood now. She pulled a soft yellow sundress from her closet, it was decorated with sunflowers. She found some wicker slides, and pulled her hair into a pony tail.

She set up an uber, and had another blunt while she waited. She couldn't curb her nerves though. When she arrived at the address, she wished she had stopped for a coffee. As the third smoke, was really making her a bit drowsy. Wouldn't that be a good first impression if she fell asleep in her first meeting. She didn't look anyone in the eyes, and kind of avoided joining any of the small groups of people waiting for the meeting to start. Gods, she wanted a drink... Something to bite away the nervous jitters she had, as well as balance out this embarrassment she was feeling.
Based on what I've seen in TV your doing a good job!
Want me to skip to the first meeting?
Amanda's boss checked on her three times after lunch, making sure she didn't want to go home... but She wanted the braindead distraction of entering information into the computer. She didn't want her brain the think about last night, or how she was completely falling apart inside. Looking back, that probably wasn't the first time Dotty had been on the edge of making that phone call. It made her feel a bit sick, to think about how much she was letting her life go.

She sighed, maybe the group meetings would help. She was bound to receive some kind of summons for her behavior. About 45 minutes before she was supposed to leave, she was sent home... She didn't argue, because she knew her work family was just concerned for her. She sat down behind the wheel of her car in silence.

The void of sound haunted her ears, it was unbearable. She started her car, and turned the knob for volume all the way up. The music that poured from the speakers vibrated her body. Atleast the car wasn't quiet anymore.

She drove home, she unfastened the buttons holding up her overalls and made her way to the couch. She collapsed onto the cushions with a flump, landing on her back head resting on one of the armrests. She reached behind her head, and fished in the sidetable drawer... where she kept her stash of fun stuff. She found the little ziplock she was looking for and her lighter. She laid the bag on her chest, and pulled out one of the joints in the bag... She always kept a few rolled, just incase she needed on NOW.

She chuckled to herself, as even that thought turned dark. It had been a long time coping mechanism for dealing with Nathan's bullshit, Sometimes it was a sobbing blunt locked away in the bathroom... knowing that when she left the safety, she was going to get beat. Sometimes if was a post asswhooping pain reliever, or he would always expect her to have some ready whenever the urge to have a smoke hit him.

She sparked her lighter, and inhaled... turning the end of the joint into a glowing ember and filling her lungs with smoke. "Alexa turn on Living Room TV." She said after a long exhale. The TV popped on, and Amanda sighed again. Despite her waning hangover, she wanted another drink... Would Dotty even serve her today, that's unlikely.

She took another drag, thinking about... surprisingly about the blurry figure of her rescuer, Miss Leslie Clay Detective Extraordinaire. "I hope I didn't say anything embarrassing last night." She said with a chime of real laughter, maybe she would have to ask Dotty about it... if she ever got around to the bar later.
This wasn't the first time in her life, Amanda had ended up in the drunk tank. There had been a night in her marriage where her and Nathan, and been picked up... Drunk and high, screaming at each other. She also knew that this treatment was above and beyond what normally happened. She was thankful for the mouthwash, and the aspirin. The shoes, and her shoes! She was thankful to see her heels, but even more so the sneakers.

She took the items and sat down on her cot. She pulled on the shoes, after reading the note. The officer that had brought her in last night, had definitely went above what was normal. She bit her lip, and stood up. She thought about looking for and thanking the officer that had helped her into a warm and safe bed... but couldn't face the woman.

"Thank you." She said to the officer at the desk, and rushed out of the station. She made it to work, barely late... her boss didn't even notice. She was super thankful, she didn't want to have to explain her night. She had stopped at home to shower, and change.... She decided to opt for comfort over form today. She was wearing a pair of black overalls, with a light blue blouse under them. She had decided to stick to shoes. She was normally much more dressed up, but her boss didn't question her when she explained... Comfort was a priority today. He just laughed knowingly, "We all have those days, if you want to dive out early just let Jeanine know to cover your phone." He said patting her desk with some folders, before laying them in her "In" tray.

Thank God. She thought leaning forward against her desk, as he walked away. Her boss had never given her shit, and had always been super flexible with her schedule since leaving Nathan. She started to enter the new accounts, or update old ones... It was pretty braindead work for her these days. She would answer the phone when it rang, and connect the caller to the person they needed to talk to.

Her mind wandered to Dotty, and around lunch she made a phone call. She ordered Dotty lunch, and had it delivered to the bar. She called up there to apologize. "I'm sorry about last night, Dotty. I was such an idiot. I haven't gotten that trashed in a long time, I'm super embarrassed." She said sitting down in her car, to talk to Dotty, without being heard by her Co-Workers. "Would you give me the name of the officer who picked me up last night? She really went above and beyond for me, and I should thank her."

Amanda scribbled down the name, and thanked the bartender. "Enjoy your lunch, So sorry. Love ya! bye!" She said hanging up the phone. Leslie Clay She read the name off the paper. She bit her lip, debating on lunch or flowers... She settled on both, and sent the officer... A huge burger from Helmsman Burgers, a famously Blue Burger joint, and a bouqet of flowers. The card read....


Thank you,
For everything you did.
Your kindness, let me continue my new life...
After a night of being low.

I can't thank you enough,
Redheaded Damsel
She also doesn't have a ton of clear memory about who helped her out. She was pretty drunk when Leslie picked her up.
@Caustic CassieAWW! Poor Leslie!
I feel bad for Amanda having to rush off to work! Maybe she gets Dotty to pass on a thank you!? Maybe some flowers, and a thank you card. AManda is pretty embarrassed by her actions, She for sure wouldn't show up in person.
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