STATUS:
Pondering an idea, kinda want to do a rp that someone gave up on and want to try it here..
1 yr ago
Last Seen:
1 yr ago
Joined:
8 yrs ago
Posts:
864
( / day)
VMs: 7
Status
Recent Statuses
1 yr ago
Current
Pondering an idea, kinda want to do a rp that someone gave up on and want to try it here..
3
likes
1 yr ago
This EVO was insane! Definitely over 100K watching and the building was stacked full! The energy was incredible!
1
like
1 yr ago
Arslan Ash is the T7 GOAT! 4th EVO title that is insane!
1 yr ago
After a insane day 2 of EVO, with today being the last day and day 3, I hope there is just as much excitement today!
2
likes
1 yr ago
After a loss...I don't know like what else to do...Keep your guard/shell up and life finds a way to hurt you when you want to protect yourself from prior experiences...
2
likes
Bio
Pen Name: Alexander Aliases: Kyoya, Terra. Birthday: September 1 Ethnicity: African-American. Ancestry: English, Irish, African.
Sources of Writing: Laptop, Desktop [maybe in the future] Years of Experience: 10. RP Level: High-Casual to Low Advanced. It varies on mental state, knowledge, and time. Commitment/Dedication Level:Very High.
Personality: Nice, Shy [when not pushed], Introverted, Caring/Compassionate, Understanding, Friendly, Honest, Imaginative, Organized, Protective, Loyal, Stubborn, Determined, Opportunistic, Sarcastic, Obsessive (somewhat) Habits, Tics, and Quirks: Daydreaming, Repeating things [at times or when pushed/provoked] Fixated on thoughts, Autistic (Learning and processing information is affected)
Biggest RP Pet Peeve: Ghosting, Whereabouts, Dishonesty. Please be present and keep me updated from time to time. I'll do the same for you. It's annoying when people become invisible or ignoring, miraculously appear out of nowhere, and complain, once they find a story canceled. And be truthful in RP's and out of them.
Basic Comforts: ~ Primarily 1x1, since groups one time died on me quick ~ Mainly male OCs, though I'll take on a female role [npc]. ~ CanonxOC, OCxOC & (sometimes) CanonxCanon. I can play various canons for both of the two. ~ MxF, FxF. I mostly do/lean into the dominant-role, depending on character and plot. ~ PM's more than threads [doesn't mean I am open to them], but stories with strong adult content belong in the PM's only. ~ Open to dark themes (drugs, abuse, etc.)
Music: '80s-'00s Heavy Metal/Rock/Rock and Roll,/Electronic-Dance, Pop, R&B, '90s-'00s Hip-Hop/Rap & Blues, Jazz, Country, Video Game OST's, Anime OST's.
I don't know if I ever will find my way really when the majority of things happening to me is bad and sets me back instead of helping me to go forward.
I'm not sure on either one of those. Hope is something you have, and I don't have much of it. And any change for me is nothing but bad and never good for me.
I have tried it but then something happens and i get yanked out back to square one. Like why bother trying to change something that is true and that my luck sucks and every attempt i have done has been nothing but false hope?
I feel like both can't be done really. For Perspective, all I get is nothing but yanked out from under me and any loss there is nothing to learn other than the fact that nothing goes my way anyways.
It's hard for me to feel like i am moving on when they keep happening again and again really. No matter what I do it doesn't feel like progress knowing the rug will be pulled from under me and I'll be back in the hole again.
Setbacks can be tough. No one's ever free of them. Even when I get tossed down I just keep moving on. See it as another lesson or maybe it simply wasn't right for me.
Well, I thought about doing one myself back in my teen years. Now, the thought has crossed my mind here and there. I can't see myself vision wise like that because of every time i do the rug gets yanked out from under me.
I understand. I once saw the world in that way as well. I have 2 suicide attempts. After that last one, my life has changed, and I see my value and I learned self-love. I can see a future for myself now. I wish for you to find that vision someday.
I don't think I am in terms of being young. It doesn't feel like I have a lot of time for romance and love in any way as I feel like I'm falling further behind from anyone else and I don't think it is coming.
Comparison only serves to cause more distress a lot of time. You're still young and I know it's hella corny to hear, but you've got a lot of time ahead of you. Which means a lot of change and experience ahead. You may not have it now but that doesn't mean it's not coming.
Self-love I think is a challenge unless you are not lucky. I feel family love is not what I want or expect and even my friends it is more of like mutual interests and talks. Not as wholesome like romantic love which i want but it is frustrating to see others get that more often.
It's sad to hear that all of your validation must come from outside sources. Self-love takes time to cultivate but I hope someday you have it. I've found it liberating.
I'm not worthy because even knowing everyone is considered it doesn't happen for me. Love is a illusion for me that comes near but never obtains it. Girls only like the 4 main types of guys and I never feel special outside the friend zone.
Lost as in, the things that are "yanked out from under" you. Even if you do not feel worthy of love, it does not invalidate the fact you are. Happiness is fleeting but so is sorrow. None of it lasts forever. But that doesn't mean it won't come back.
I'm not sure if I am worthy of love. Lately it doesn't feel like it in any way. I don't know what I could have lost, I just feel I'm outside the box so much that I don't think I'm worthy of love in any form.
Friendship is like the only form of good love I have gotten more than family love depending on who is giving it to me. I do not know if I'm worthy of love as good things for me always tend to be yanked out from under me way often.
Friendship, familial love, the love of a stranger on your page telling you that you're worthy of love. I'm not here to convince you of anything. But just know that I love you and see you as a valuable expression of the universe, like everyone.
I don't think so at all. In terms of romance, I feel girls are only into jocks, muscleheads, players and thugs only. Guys with tattoos also qualify. My RP luck is complete trash when it feels like no one likes what you like or whatever your interest is, it doesn't line up anywhere at all.
I feel that way as well 100%. Within being here, I feel like my luck has worsened in terms of my roleplay successes and at this point I'm tired of it and even I wonder where I went wrong.
You finish the first two months of a job and you'll be amazed by how many people have started already accepting you as "one of the gang." It's an awesome feeling (even if you don't REALLY know these people and never do anything social with them outside of the break room). Keep up the good work!
You are right. Over time it became like that and i have been enjoying two years of working with them so the feeling is awesome and i get to be out of my shell with them.
[color=ed1c24][b]Pen Name:[/b][/color] Alexander
[color=ed1c24][b]Aliases:[/b][/color] Kyoya, Terra.
[color=ed1c24][b]Birthday:[/b][/color] September 1
[color=ed1c24][b]Ethnicity:[/b][/color] African-American.
[color=ed1c24][b]Ancestry:[/b][/color] English, Irish, African.
[color=fff200][b]Occupation(s)[/b][/color]: Part-Time Parking Event Staff, Student (school-year; part-time)
[color=fff200][b]Major:[/b][/color] Cinema and Screen Studies
[color=00aeef][b]Sources of Writing:[/b][/color] Laptop, Desktop [maybe in the future]
[color=00aeef][b]Years of Experience:[/b][/color] 10.
[color=00aeef][b]RP Level:[/b][/color] High-Casual to Low Advanced. It varies on mental state, knowledge, and time.
[color=00aeef][b]Commitment/Dedication Level:[/b][/color] [b]Very High.[/b]
[color=662d91]Personality:[/color] Nice, Shy [when not pushed], Introverted, Caring/Compassionate, Understanding, Friendly, Honest, Imaginative, Organized, Protective, Loyal, Stubborn, Determined, Opportunistic, Sarcastic, Obsessive (somewhat)
[color=662d91]Habits, Tics, and Quirks:[/color] Daydreaming, Repeating things [at times or when pushed/provoked] Fixated on thoughts, Autistic (Learning and processing information is affected)
[color=9e0b0f][u][b]Biggest RP Pet Peeve:[/b][/u][/color]
Ghosting, Whereabouts, Dishonesty.
Please be present and keep me updated from time to time. I'll do the same for you.
It's annoying when people become invisible or ignoring, miraculously appear out of nowhere, and complain, once they find a story canceled.
And be truthful in RP's and out of them.
[color=ec008c]Close Peeps:[/color] [@AngelBites15], [@Vampiretwilight], [@SilverRain], [@Polymorpheus] [RIP]
[color=00a651]Basic Comforts:[/color]
~ Primarily 1x1, since groups one time died on me quick
~ Mainly male OCs, though I'll take on a female role [npc].
~ CanonxOC, OCxOC & (sometimes) CanonxCanon. I can play various canons for both of the two.
~ MxF, FxF. I mostly do/lean into the dominant-role, depending on character and plot.
~ PM's more than threads [doesn't mean I am open to them], but stories with strong adult content belong in the PM's only.
~ Open to dark themes (drugs, abuse, etc.)
[color=004b80]Genres[/color] - Action, Adventure, Anime/Animation, Comedy, Drama[a bit], Family, Fantasy, Horror, Mystery, Romance, Sci-Fi, Superhero, Western, Fandom, Video Games
[color=003471]Themes -[/color] College/High School, Martial Arts, Medieval, Post-Apocalypse, Supernatural, Fantasy, Modern, Slice of Life, Futuristic [maybe]
[color=f9ad81]Music:[/color] '80s-'00s Heavy Metal/Rock/Rock and Roll,/Electronic-Dance, Pop, R&B, '90s-'00s Hip-Hop/Rap & Blues, Jazz, Country, Video Game OST's, Anime OST's.
<div style="white-space:pre-wrap;"><font color="#ed1c24"><span class="bb-b">Pen Name:</span></font> Alexander<br><font color="#ed1c24"><span class="bb-b">Aliases:</span></font> Kyoya, Terra.<br><font color="#ed1c24"><span class="bb-b">Birthday:</span></font> September 1<br><font color="#ed1c24"><span class="bb-b">Ethnicity:</span></font> African-American.<br><font color="#ed1c24"><span class="bb-b">Ancestry:</span></font> English, Irish, African.<br><br><font color="#fff200"><span class="bb-b">Occupation(s)</span></font>: Part-Time Parking Event Staff, Student (school-year; part-time)<br><font color="#fff200"><span class="bb-b">Major:</span></font> Cinema and Screen Studies<br><br><font color="#00aeef"><span class="bb-b">Sources of Writing:</span></font> Laptop, Desktop [maybe in the future] <br><font color="#00aeef"><span class="bb-b">Years of Experience:</span></font> 10.<br><font color="#00aeef"><span class="bb-b">RP Level:</span></font> High-Casual to Low Advanced. It varies on mental state, knowledge, and time.<br><font color="#00aeef"><span class="bb-b">Commitment/Dedication Level:</span></font> <span class="bb-b">Very High.</span><br><br><font color="#662d91">Personality:</font> Nice, Shy [when not pushed], Introverted, Caring/Compassionate, Understanding, Friendly, Honest, Imaginative, Organized, Protective, Loyal, Stubborn, Determined, Opportunistic, Sarcastic, Obsessive (somewhat)<br><font color="#662d91">Habits, Tics, and Quirks:</font> Daydreaming, Repeating things [at times or when pushed/provoked] Fixated on thoughts, Autistic (Learning and processing information is affected)<br> <br><font color="#9e0b0f"><span class="bb-u"><span class="bb-b">Biggest RP Pet Peeve:</span></span></font> <br>Ghosting, Whereabouts, Dishonesty.<br>Please be present and keep me updated from time to time. I'll do the same for you.<br>It's annoying when people become invisible or ignoring, miraculously appear out of nowhere, and complain, once they find a story canceled.<br>And be truthful in RP's and out of them. <br><br><font color="#ec008c">Close Peeps:</font> <a class="bb-mention" href="/users/angelbites15">@AngelBites15</a>, <a class="bb-mention" href="/users/vampiretwilight">@Vampiretwilight</a>, <a class="bb-mention" href="/users/silverrain">@SilverRain</a>, <a class="bb-mention" href="/users/polymorpheus">@Polymorpheus</a> [RIP]<br><br><font color="#00a651">Basic Comforts:</font><br>~ Primarily 1x1, since groups one time died on me quick<br>~ Mainly male OCs, though I'll take on a female role [npc]. <br>~ CanonxOC, OCxOC & (sometimes) CanonxCanon. I can play various canons for both of the two. <br>~ MxF, FxF. I mostly do/lean into the dominant-role, depending on character and plot. <br>~ PM's more than threads [doesn't mean I am open to them], but stories with strong adult content belong in the PM's only.<br>~ Open to dark themes (drugs, abuse, etc.) <br><br><font color="#004b80">Genres</font> - Action, Adventure, Anime/Animation, Comedy, Drama[a bit], Family, Fantasy, Horror, Mystery, Romance, Sci-Fi, Superhero, Western, Fandom, Video Games<br><font color="#003471">Themes -</font> College/High School, Martial Arts, Medieval, Post-Apocalypse, Supernatural, Fantasy, Modern, Slice of Life, Futuristic [maybe]<br><br><font color="#f9ad81">Music:</font> '80s-'00s Heavy Metal/Rock/Rock and Roll,/Electronic-Dance, Pop, R&B, '90s-'00s Hip-Hop/Rap & Blues, Jazz, Country, Video Game OST's, Anime OST's.</div>