Salroka

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted, but there are live spiders inside of it.

I wish I had a spaceship with a cannon that shot crocodiles at everyone I hate, and that those crocodiles could also shoot heat-seeking killer bees to ensure there would be no escape.

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted. But your house/apartment catches on fire and all your cosplay are consumed by the blaze.

I wish for an AR15 that fires bullets that are actually as dangerous as the gun control nuts think they fire.

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted, but now every game is an EA game.

I wish for [DATA EXPUNGED] and [REDACTED].

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted. But they are cheap plastic souvenirs.

I wish anime filler was better than it usually is.

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted, but then the person who finds it entertaining begins to stalk you. Then they kill you and wear your face back to your family's house.

I wish bacon was its own food group.

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted. But now you are in Guantanemo Bay for a rash of serial school bombings.

I wish my spaghetti wasn't cold...

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted. But now you literally ARE a dandelion seed.

I wish that if I said "Hachooken" (Achoo + Hadoken) when I sneezed, a ki blast would shoot out of my face.

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted, but you lose the ability to speak a day later.

I wish I could get paid for breathing.

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted, but the first place you go is a dimension made of pure eternal itchiness.

I wish Elon Musk would launch himself to Mars on a rocket made of his own smug.

P.S. MXC is a comedy show using dubbed-over footage from an old Japanese show called Takeshi's Castle. It has no real canon. So that corruption of my wish is fine by me.

Make a wish, corrupt a wish.

Granted, but the trainers are being attacked and killed and their pokemon taken away by non-trainers because the government has declared war on the trainers, so you either surrender all your Pokémon or die. #ArtImitatesLife

I wish MXC would go back on the air and have new episodes.