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11 mos ago
Current @SaltSight Game was Astlibra: Revision. Found it on sale bundled with another game I've been wanting so I gave it a shot and got like, straight indie JRPG of the early 2000s injected into my veins.
3 likes
11 mos ago
Hate that strange ennui that hits after 100%'ing a really, really good game. Good time was had, but man am I glad it can't mess my sleep schedule up anymore.
6 likes
2 yrs ago
Rich people blood sports is how the Oscar's should always have gone. As a hot blooded american man I cant sleep at night without witnessing violence of some kind.
3 likes
3 yrs ago
So true. Anyways, play Lancer!
3 yrs ago
Final Fantasy: Stranger in Paradise is the funniest shit I've ever seen while also not being a bad game. Just crack open some cold ones with the boys, blare Limp Bizket, and Kill Chaos.

Bio

No longer an asshole!

Most Recent Posts

Name: Kanata Mizuki

Age: 14

Appearance:


Description: The moon rabbit hops onto the scene, primed and ready to beat evil back before lunchtime! Or Dinnertime! Or whatever meal comes next, really. This perpetually peckish girl is a foodie at heart, and loves nothing more than sharing good food with good friends after a hard day spent dispensing justice.

Grimoire:
Title: The Moon Rabbit
Description: On the moon there sits a rabbit, continually pounding away at soft mochi for the Gods. This grimoire details the daily life of that rabbit, as well as the friends that come to visit it on its home. Some say that the sweets this rabbit created were enough to heal the hearts and bodies of men and Gods alike.

Abilities:
Now you're a rabbit too!: By using this grimoire, Kanata gains the exaggerated powers of a rabbit. Sensitive ears, faster feet, and higher jumps, all of which make her more mobile than any human on earth.

Moon Hammer: A long pounding kine that resembles one used to pound rice or mochi, only much larger, made of grey stone, and with a glowing ball in the shape of a full moon at the other end of the handle. Upon making contact with an object or person, a ball of mochi will form that will quickly form into a Mochi Rabbit. These Mochi Rabbits are little helpers that resemble snow rabbits and bounce around on the ground. These constructs feel little pain and have the consistency of dough, making them spongy and resistant to physical attacks. Its also difficult to get out of one if you get stuck, but they are mostly harmless on their own, incapable of doing anything save for bouncing around and sticking to objects or people. They can also combine together, becoming one very big, squishy, sticky, harmless being.

Misc: Kanata is an amazing cook, and is often packing snacks for herself and others.




Applying for this since I think its still open.

Alice listened intently to her tanuki friend, and, surprisingly, she found that neither herself nor Brandy were at fault. Wow! The guild must really not want to pay insurance coverage for jobs like these, otherwise the wording of the contracts for jobs wouldn't be so specific! ...Seriously, was the guild run by devils? This sounded devil-y. Either way, they were off the hook!

Practically deflating, Alice would slump onto the desk, Alice would smile with her eyes closed. "PHEW! I was scared there..." she said, resting until she heard the clink of coin on the desk. Her ears perked up, seeing the miniscule coinage on display that would have to be split between the two of them. Alice had to admit, it turned her stomach getting paid such a puny amount but...it was walking a dog. It wasn't like they'd slayed a dragon or anything. Though at the rate Ms. Elmwood was going, Alice was scared she might turn into one...

The sound of hooves and hooters approached, and, turning to meet her partner in menial labor, Alice said: "We just got paid Brandy. Its...not much, but, it was just a small starter job. The next one we'll rake in more cash, and maybe even take on two at once!" Then, Brandy started talking about rescuing some hunk. And waving a flyer around. Well, Alice did like strong men, but an outdated ad for a contest for them wasn't catching her eye.

"A-Anyways, uh...yeah, she's enthusiastic! And...not too bright...kinda...kinda dim, actually...hehe...but, anyways, I don't want to abandon someone who stuck up for me. If it weren't for her, I doubt I'd have had the courage to talk to Ms. Elmwood the way I did after screwing up." Alice clenched her hands, eyes sparkling as she said: "Besides, I can teach her to be smart! I have a degree and all. How hard can it be to teach a Satyr to read?"

Within the ever-busy-bodied-brain-in-body Levia Vishap resided the ever present desire to do good for those she respects. To be praised by them, work beside them, do her best for them, and to ever strive to be worthy of her father's their love. When Havern's claw descended upon her head, Levia felt time grow to a stand still, almost certain that now, since she'd destroyed everything she'd been asked to, it was her time for permanent firing. Violent permanent firing. But just when she closed her eyes, the talon turned into the warm hand of her guild leader. For what might be the first time in...

Forever. Forever was how long it had been. Forever it has been since she felt such warmth and gratitude. Forever had it been since she was praised so wholeheartedly. Forever would it be that she served this warmth. Tears streamed down Levia as she stood in stunned silence. Were it not for her respect for Faetalis, the guild leader would find herself victim to a dragonic four armed hug and wailing fest. Instead, Levia controlled her self. One of her back arms reached down and picked up the displaced hat that had fallen from the gigantic talon touching it. Adjusting her hat once Faetalis's hand had left her scalp, the chimera before Faetalis would wipe her tears of joy and clench her fists. She had a job to do, to continue to do, and whatever Faetalis could order, Levia would follow.

"Lady Faetalis, thank you for your praise," Levia said, bowing as she took a knee, trying to hide her excitement even as her tail batted one of Tungsten's CSo4 Units out of the room they were in with a happy flick. Standing, the dragoness's eyes were hardened once more, reptilian slits narrowing as she realized the implications of the words "set upon". Life forms. Hostility. Bad guys. The almost too lizard-like brain of Levia only heard that their territory needed defending, and was liable to storm off to meet this threat were that task not assigned to Mae. Draconic. Nesting. Protection. New instincts and new chemical pathways burned within that told her that the guild absolutely must be protected at all costs. Oddly, this involved Levia breaking a pathway.

"Whatever needs to be broken shall be, Lady Faetalis." Levia would clench her fists and pound the larger set together, while adjusting the gloves on her scaled human-like hands. "And, if you ever need the invasion permanently broken, I can melt down whatever Mae leaves, if it comes to that."

"I am SO telling Gammaton that I got praised later! Ooh, I gotta bring her something nice! Maybe if a human's stuck up on the mountain, I can get her a new host. Or a snack. Either way, its thanks to her help that I got praised, so I'll have to work hard to make sure she gets plenty of praise next!" Despite her cool posturing and threatening tone, any could see that Levia was, once again, excited to work, and happy to work.

Gammaton would hear all about it later. Maybe it'd be a Girl's Night. They could invite Mae for snacks!
Steppe Archer tutted, wagging her finger back and forth. "For girls, being stinky is unbearable. We could just use some herbs to hide the scent for now though," the archer girl said in response to Lizard Fighter's statement. Bathing was common in the mornings and nights at her home, and done in rivers colder than the one in Palisade. At least, Steppe Archer thought it was. Maybe a few too many cold nights traveling and camping meant that she was just getting numb to chilled temperatures.

The nomad girl's eyes focused on the druid girl for a moment, imagining the specific scenario of them bathing an alleyway before a sour look crossed her face. "With how much that drunk the other night kept mentioning your chest, that sounds like a terrible idea. Besides, wasting well-water doesn't sit well with me." At her own stupid, terrible pun of a joke the girl's cheeks inflated like a frog's, as if she was struggling to contain laughter at the most comedic thing ever. Except it was...a pun. That she made. "Heh...anyways, yeah, signing sounds like a good idea. That way we aren't stuck outside the gates if we're back too late."

While their druidic companion wandered over to get her pen on the page, the archer eyed the suspicious Rhea boys with a slight tilt to her head. It was obvious they were looking for something, given the way they weren't staring ahead, or at the ground, but squarely at the belts of passerbys. She had nothing against Rhea at all, it was just...obvious. What was even more obvious was that the nobleman was liable to get his coinpouch nicked if he walked by them. She didn't wish such a fate to fall on any innocent, and was about to walk over and warn him before-

"Three times!"

"Three times!"

"Three times!"

Whatever goodwill the nomad girl had evaporated in that instant, clenching a fist and saying: "Druid, if anyone EVER asks you to bend down while they're still standing, tell me." The girl looked absolutely furious, to the extent that now, she really didn't care if the lechorous noble found himself suddenly missing his coin. With her fury subsided, the girl would place her hands on the druid girl's shoulders, taking a deep breathe, and asking:

"Druid. ...Did...anyone ever explain to you where men's eyes wander? Especially weak-willed ones? Our lizard friend here is strong, and doesn't care a bit about our bodies. But...erm...some men do...and some men may ask you to do things to trick you into getting to see more of your..."

The girl's eyes fell squarely on Druid girl's frankly huge badonkers, before she whispered: "...Breasts."

HOW DID STEPPE ARCHER HAVE MORE COMMON SENSE THAN HER? Steppe Archer grew up in an entirely different nation!
Alice was somewhat relieved that Brandy wouldn't be there for Alice's chewing out session. She had to wonder what her punishment would be...forced to lick toilets clean? Garbage duty for a month? Dressing up in one of those cute (but admittedly not her style) guild dresses and being assigned desk duty? She'd gotten that last one before and was shockingly good at it...so much so that she had to fight tooth and nail to not get stuck as a guild girl forever. Now, she wasn't sure if this was the last straw.

Alice's ears were flattened against her hair, and despite wanting to cry a bit at how unfair the job was to begin with, Alice kept herself under control and calmly explained her side of the story. She didn't want to excuse herself as she did admittedly screw up, but made it very obvious to Karin that this job was doomed no matter who took it on. A dog like that had so much energy from being cooped up that taking it outside without a leash was just asking for trouble. But, then she did admit that she lost her cool at having basically the entire town and Ms. Elmwood turn against them. Bowing her head, Alice would finish by saying: "...I'm so sorry for all of this. Both the botched job, and causing trouble for the guild. Whatever it takes to make this up to you all, I'll do it. Just...B-Brandy's new to all this. Whatever her punishment is supposed to be too, I'll take care of it. ...I don't want her losing that adventurer's spirit. Sure she may be..."

Alice paused while looking for a really, really, really nice way to not just outright call Brandy the most innately un-smartest person she'd ever met.

"...Different. But, she has a good heart. I don't wanna have it be broken because I...messed up walking a dog."

Come hell or highwater, Alice wasn't willing to let Brandy get punished because Alice was the one that screwed up. ...Even if it meant the one-week-wonder guild girl had to permanently have desk duty. She supposed she could get used to the blouses and the heels. Maybe her and Karin could go out drinking too after hours. Maybe even Nim would smile at having a workaholic like Alice helping Karin out with the hall.

...Or maybe Nim would turn Alice into a frog. Who knew, really?
When it came to the hardworking members of Infactorium, rest wasn't necessarily something that was considered on the job. This carried true for most, and the draconic chimera that loved nothing more than punching things all day long embodied the candid "I work for no overtime or vacation days" spirit. Still, even if demolishing almost a hundred buildings was a great deal of fun, she couldn't help but wonder if their guild leader was doing alright out there. She didn't doubt her power in the slightest but...

But...

But...

...Was she just going to abandon her? Like NotEvenHere had done?

Gritting her teeth, Levia slammed a piece of concrete into the ground and started taking her frustrations out upon it, stomping it so much that all that remained of it was powder. Levia's fear would be dispelled however, as gargantuan wingbeats resounded and signaled the return of Faetalis.

With the innocent concrete spared her continued wrath, Levia would excitedly pursue her master and skid to a halt, nearly running into her. "Mistress Faetalis, it is good that you have returned safely!" she said, taking a knee. Looking up, she smiled before saying: "We've been hard at work following your instructions to the letter Ma'am! We've nearly repurposed every idle building in the area, and have taken full stock of our resources. Tungsten and Cormac should be able to tell you more though." With her head bowed, Levia would await the words and orders of her leader, tail swishing idly and proudly, constantly pointing at the pile of rubble that she was just about to deliver as if to loudly proclaim: "I DID IT MASTER! I BROKE IT LIKE YOU ASKED!"

Levia didn't seem aware of this...but her expression certainly gave Faetalis that look that she really enjoyed her work.
Politics were never the strong-suit of wanderers and nomads. Usually it was a simple matter of getting people to agree on a course of action, but there were hiccups sometimes. Usually those ended in duels and wrestling, but Steppe Archer had to assume that out here that fancy thing called a "petition" was the equivalent. It took a fair bit of peeking around the sides of people and getting yelled at to get off of a fence before the nomad girl got the situation, and decide that this might be a pretty good idea!

Sure, there were negatives, but the pros seemed to greatly outweigh the cons. Orderly enough, Steppe Archer waited her turn to sign the petition with her surprisingly neat signature, before returning to the Druid Girl's side. Paying for a meat skewer, the archer would happily nom upon her kebab, amazed that for someone that didn't seem to do a lot of intense physical training on the regular, the druid girl had a huge appetite. Maybe being a magic caster meant burning a lot of energy for magic?

She had no idea, but it made some sense. Giving the stick her meal had been on one final lick, the girl beamed at her companions before asking: "Soooo...river bath again? Big Red didn't break a sweat, but we might start stinking if we don't take care of that soon." It was starting to concern the girl that they were bathing so frequently. Not because she disliked it, but because she'd heard folk tales back home of women so vain that they washed and washed and washed, scrubbing so hard that all their skin fell off and left them as skeletons with beautiful hair.

...It was definitely just a children's story, but still. She liked her skin.
There was a long, long silence as Alice walked back with Brandy, before Alice turned to look at her, dewy eyed and downtrodden as she was. "...We...are probably not getting paid after that, Brandy," she said, unsure if not getting paid was going to be the least of their worries after the guild got notice of them failing to walk a damn dog. Stopping before the guild hall's doors, Alice would slap herself twice and grip the door handles.

She'd messed up on one job before, accidentally making too strong of a poison for some ants that killed a good patch of someone's lawn but...that was at least fixable. Ms. Elmwood was a nightmare for someone like Alice, who'd grown up in a country entirely centered on working hard and not taking shit because if you worked, you were unionized. Guild workers didn't even have DENTAL! Gritting her teeth she would throw the guild doors open (softly) and stride in (ashamedly), and head over to the guild desk and hesitantly report what happened, ears and tail drooping the entire time.
Soooo, how's everybody doing? Been quiet on the Western front. And the Southern front. North front's popping but that's the usual. East front...

You know. East front.
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