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    1. Touhoure 11 yrs ago

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Following her sister after their small, informal greeting that turned into a private conversation, Adeline was left questioning about a million things. Why wouldn't she want to be titled Queen by her own sister? Isn't it such a pleasing thing to hear? Or was she those types who remained so tender and kind to their lower-shelves that such a high title could be omitted? Surely, she's read something like that once, but she couldn't pin point it. This surprise was carried out as her sister started inquire her, leaving Adeline's previous inquiries behind. So, perhaps they weren't as important, or her sister was caught up in excitement over some news or an idea -- oh, news or an idea! Now that caught the princess's attention. She kept her eyes set on her sister, though she shook her head with a small chuckle at the last question. With a small smile, she hesitated to respond to her sister's fulfilling love and attention, but she managed to give her a small pat on the back. That would due, right? Then, she stepped away to converse with the Queen.

"Well..." Adeline started, her eyes trailing away from her sister, but then back to her. "I suppose I have been decent, but bored. Sure, there are many, many, many books, however..." She paused and looked down on the books she had, placing them on a nearby vanity, "I do feel like I am running out of some. Perhaps I should explore the shelves more -- there was a story where a man pulled a book from a shelf, and it turned out to be magic and led him into a secret, mysterious dungeon! Wouldn't it be funny if we had something like that? I don't think father was one for secrets, but how will we ever know? I think that's the point of a secret and I'm sure if he had one, he hid it very well..." She chuckled a bit to herself, but then came time to address her sister's last question. Now, Adeline was one for detail, so she made sure to respond to every inquiry.

"Don't be silly -- you're being silly!" She smiled, shaking her head as she lowered her eyes down. "Surely, it would be nice, but I have yet to find anyone like the bard's describe. The tall, the handsome, the brave, and the noble... Such qualities are found by knowing someone, though I think tall can be discernible by appearance. Though... I think a few men from the last ball fit the description -- would you remember?" Adeline sighed as she turned away, back to her vanity where she lifted her dress a bit as she sat down. Then, she took the brush nearby and started to tend to her locks.

"Less about me though and more about yourself. Is there anything you need?" Adeline asked her sister again, looking up to her with a curious portrait.
I should probably set a date for clean up soon...
Strolling from the hallway to the library and down the bookshelves and back, Adeline indulged herself in the collection she continued to admire and desired to build upon. Every shelf like every tower dangled with different names and engravings on the side. The arrangement of colors lit up the room that remained dim for the books' safe-keeping. To this day she still marveled the sights of knowledge and literature, clutching the book in her hand. They were to grow old one day to history, but to her they will always present something new.

She exchanged books with the library. The large study room had much to explore, but she already had an idea of what she exactly wanted. Setting the book in her arms down by a desk, she wandered over and started to go through the list of many writings of amusement and information. Since her last book five reads were all fantasy of some sorts, perhaps she should pick up something more non-fiction, shouldn't she? She mentally agreed with herself. It would be terrible to wear herself out on the same topic already, no? However, it was tempting, for her eyes peered over the shelf to see the third volume of what she finished reading. While Adeline loved to spice things up, she also liked to keep things continuous, and her mind pondered... But maybe she could have both? A simply solution -- yes, both! She took the third volume nearby and a smaller book nearby and made her exit out of the room with a high neck and smile.

As she departed the library and headed towards her room, she saw a figure at the door. This perked her interest, though her heart sunk at the thought of the figure being another pesky maid, but by her surprise it was her sister! Ah, yes, the glorious queen! And how lucky was she! With a bright smile as a form of comfort, she came up to her sister and greeted her in formal matter.
"Queen Kyalia -- oh, look at you!" Adeline cheerfully spoke as she clung to her books. "You look quite lovely today, though your hair seems darker..." Well, at least from her memory. She couldn't recall much of her sister's appearance from the last time they ran into each other, but she was worse off trying to remember what her own brother looks like. She's not too proud of this trait, but she resumed to the conversation. "How are you on this fine," Adeline asked, but then quickly added, "Queen Kyalia?" Of course, she wasn't used to having her sister being queen; It was easy to call her by her first name and adding the proper title to her name left her puzzled. It wasn't because it was official, but perhaps because it was... unnatural compared to the past years. She dared not let her mind wonder in that direction though and after looking away for a bit, she returned her eyes to her sister. "Is there anything you need or wish to request?"
As long as no one has directly said in their profiles like... "Oh, I'm her brother! He's my father!" And so on and on, you can have the king however you like. Thus, you don't have to.

I think the only other kingdom that really needs a queen is Gabriel -- a king or queen that is. And haha, okay. >u< ~
Oh, I dare you. I dare you very much indeed.

Nevertheless, that's understandable. So many characters, so many interactions -- it all adds up to a lot of writing that may never be finished.
I take that's your form of max? I usually go with four as an average, or preference, and other times two. Sure, I could make up to eight, but like... -shivers- It's a group role-play and why would that be necessary?

WileyCoyote, first of all, your icon is gorgeous.
It's completely fine -- take the time you feel is right. As about a few missing roles, that would be lovely however I will not force it upon you. If you can do it, yay! If you can't, then it's okay~ ^__^
As long as there is a queen or king present, the kingdom should be fine. Sadly, there's has been an inferred king and queen for Gabriel and king for Lucifer. I may leave them as NPCs, but I'd rather not...

I would fill in those roles if I wasn't playing a princess and a king already...
So, I just got my ice cream, and ready to do this.
I'd like to give thanks to Savi for mentioning these small things, but I shall carry this off with...

Wisp said
>> There are so many ellipses, it's hard to focus. And run-on sentences. And parentheses.
>> Raphael's King called, not Gabriel's King - two totally different people
>> Kingdom of Gabriel killed her parents - they have the assassins and are the threat to the Kingdom of Michael.
>> Kingdom of Raphael wishes for peace, and has not harmed anyone.
>> Kingdom of Lucifer is naught but a bedtime story to frighten children into behaving - definitely not common knowledge or well-known.
>> There is no option, no choice, in the eldest rising to the throne. Adeline was never an option, since she has an elder sister.
>> To wish for death and leave with the intent is essentially treason - if she does not die from her little "mission", she will likely be hung.
>> Ash is not in the Kingdom of Michael, much less your character. Ash is Princess Ani's personal servant in the Kingdom of Gabriel.


So me and Wisp observed pretty much the same things, and these are pretty much it -- though I didn't recognize the sixth bullet's info until now. Even though Savi already mentioned such, I would still like to point out the second bullet along with bullets one, three, four, five, and the last one. Those are just my main burdens and the rest of the stuff is something I can suck up after an experience in... Free Role-play.

Yes, there are many ellipses, which makes it odd to read. I understand there are only two parentheses, and if that is part of your writing style then I cannot really deny you from such. There are also some run-on sentences, but maybe it's just the ellipses driving me crazy. Suppose this is just your writing style and maybe I am not one to judge. I too have a rather annoying writing style, or so I would assume... I seek no flattery however, and I will carry on with my points.
Yet, I am much caring for the information being presented in the role-play. You will have to revise and acknowledge that Raphael was calling for this meeting. A messenger would have come for her anyways, but I suppose whichever way or thing works for you is fine... I also cannot really tell where your character is, which completely threw me off when she was found behind Ash since he was in Ani's room and I was like -- what? I would assume naturally by knowing your character that she was in the Kingdom of Michael, but maybe, for some reason, I am wrong. While that, I suppose your character believing in myths and superstitions could be some form of justice towards thinking the Kingdom of Lucifer is real, but for the majority of the people the kingdom has been put to rest so long ago that there is no chance it's coming back ( or perhaps some other reason as to why they wouldn't believe it's active or existing, either or ). Another point I should make is that during the text...
Kaalee said Although...that hadn't worked out too well in the recent past...since she was having to make this decision in the first place although she knew her sister wouldn't have been a good Queen...

The word decision changes much about what is going on. I would understand if she felt cornered, like she couldn't trust her sister with having the throne, however the seat goes to the eldest in the royal family line. Maybe this is just your diction, but it does change the meaning of the sentence or how she was given a choice. If you cannot comply with the above, then you are free to leave. However, I trust that if you intend to stay you will change your post to the correct order or you will have to be removed. Forgive me for this post early in time -- it was necessary.
I also did mention a revision a few times -- but I understand if that wasn't exactly clear, or if a post I made ever mentioned this. Do forgive me about such.

Now to read these posts...
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ʜosᴛ cʟuʙ
President : Suou Tamaki : 3 - A : Wisp
Vice President : Ootori Kyoya : 3 - A : Touhoure
Little Devil Member : Hitachiin Hikaru : 2 - A : nʏoom
Little Devil Member : Hitachiin Kaoru : 2 - A : nʏoom
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ʙʟacᴋ maɢic cʟuʙ
President : Kanazuki Reiko : 2 - D : nʏoom

ɢarᴅeninɢ cʟuʙ
President : Hoshina Tetsuya : 3 - B : Wisp
Vice President : Kasanoda Ritsu : 2 - D : nʏoom
Member : Murakami Ayame : 3 - B : Wisp
University : Kobayashi Hisao : Wisp

newsᴘaᴘer cʟuʙ
President : Maeda Azumi : 2 - B : Touhoure
Vice President : Maeda Ayumi : 2 - B : Wisp
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oᴛʜer canons
University : Nekozawa Umehito : Wisp

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G A Y : Mizushima Nobuyuki : 1 - B : Touhoure
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