Merja “Mer” Aaltonen
Evergreen Campus || Monday AfternoonToday was a footwork day. Usually, Mer didn’t mind these days; footwork was a monotonous task with few immediate benefits, and though repeating and holding the same movements and positions got dull after a few sets, it was a necessary repetition, especially in her case. For her to keep up with her teammates, she’d have to pick up many skills and tricks to make up for what she lacked in innate talent, and for that she needed a strong foundation to build on. Her scholarship was counting on it, as was her extracurricular list, which was conspicuously empty compared to her more social and club-involved classmates. Though she was reaching the end of her secondary school career, what she needed to do now was finish strong, and to do that she needed to ensure that she had her fundamentals down.
This particular afternoon, though, Mer wasn’t feeling footwork. More specifically, she wasn’t focusing on it, her mind on other things as she held positions, squats, and lunges. Lifting legs and stepping in place wasn't hard, but there was always a right and a wrong way to practice, and being mindful—that is, aware—is often the key difference. For Mer right now, with her head removed from her actions, going through the routines made little difference in the long run and took even less effort. Rather than thinking about where she was placing her legs and what muscles she needed to flex and relax, Mer found her thoughts being occupied by her classes. An exam was coming up for biology, and chemistry was never a class to let up on its workload. To top it all off, grades had come out for her last psychology assignment, and although she’d improved, her improvement was so minimal she doubted she could improve any less.
“Aaltonen, focus!”
Mer froze, then relaxed slowly, meeting her coach’s eyes.
“Yes, coach!”Her coach shot her a disapproving look but said nothing more on it, continuing to patrol the outskirts of the group as they moved in relative sync, shouting out transitions every now and then. While Mer might have been distracted, no one else seemed to be, and she scrambled for focus, a sinking feeling in her gut. Being preoccupied with schoolwork would lead to her slowing her progress as a fencer, and if she fell behind on the team, she would only have more to worry about. It all seemed like a never-ending downward spiral that, in all likelihood, was already in motion.
The hopelessness of the situation shook Mer, momentarily threatening to overwhelm her in the midst of bouncing to and fro on the balls of her feet, but another shout from the coach allowed Mer the break she needed to direct her attention back to the present. The careful back and forth, left and right hops became her sole focus, and afternoon practice progressed as usual.
Aaltonen Residence || Early Tuesday Morning“Syödä, Kuu.” Mer smothered a yawn as she leaned down to replace Kuutar’s bowl, smoothing her fingers over Kuu’s fur as she straightened. Outside, the sun was still obscured by buildings, but the sky was lightening quickly. While the morning air was cool, the autumn humidity of London made for a muggy sort of day, especially with the rains so close in the past.
Munching on a piece of cucumber, Mer sat, watching as Kuu ate her food. She was by no means a late sleeper, and by some standards she may even be called an early riser, but her father always seemed to beat her out the door. Call it passion for or dedication to his job, but at this point Mer had a hard time picturing him without a stack of papers or a calculator in front of him. In fact, the tip-tap of calculator keys being pushed served as the best indication that her father was home nowadays, and the conspicuous silence in the house—aside from Kuu’s light crunches—was enough to confirm his departure for her.
Retrieving her psychology reading notes from her bag, Mer wondered if her lack of soreness was a problem. The workout yesterday hadn’t been very intensive, but legwork usually imparted her some tightness in her shins. Recently, such workouts hadn’t been leaving their marks like before, and it was worrying Mer. Was she perhaps not pushing herself hard enough during practice? It was very likely, considering her scattered focus as of late. Classes were in full swing, and her second round of tests was creeping up. Letting up now, though, wasn’t an option. If anything, Mer needed to push herself more and find a way to spread her focus over all her commitments, especially on the ones she was falling short on.
Her psychology notes were taken out precisely because of this. Afterschool was her weekly meeting with Mr. Roscoe, and she wanted to make sure everything was perfect. Despite her best efforts, psychology seemed like an enigma, alluding her whenever she thought she was finally understanding or making progress. Understanding one concept seemed to distract her from the key to another, and she was frustrated by her own shortcomings on many an assignment. What scared her more than her minimal rate of improvement, though, was the confidence that seemed to settle in whenever she completed an assignment or test. With biology and chemistry, she could accurately predict when and where she needed help, what subjects she didn’t quite have down, but psychology was the subject in which she frequently thought she was correct, only to find out afterwards that she was miserably wrong from the start. Fixing mistakes she couldn’t even catch herself seemed like an impossible task, which is why she was so glad Mr. Roscoe had offered to let her come in after school. Hopefully her scores would see improvement, and soon.
A buzz on her phone signalled that it was almost time to leave, and Mer stuck the last half of her egg into her mouth as she packed up her notes. Everything seemed to be in order, and she couldn’t see what she’d add or change to improve her notes, but she couldn’t shake the doubt in the corner of her mind as she gave Kuu her last pet of the morning. Wasn’t this feeling of security—of confidence—what she always felt with her psychology assignments? How could she be sure that this time she was right when she’d been wrong so many other times?
The Tube, though, waited for no one, and Mer kept a brisk pace as she scanned in and boarded, her mind wandering again. She’d try having confidence again because she needed to. Without it, she couldn’t guarantee she’d get anything done.
Courtyard || Tuesday MorningMer was early, as she often was when she kept a pace brisk enough to make the earlier boarding to Evergreen. Though it was a frequent scenario, she always found herself at a loss as to what to do with her bit of free time in the morning. Pulling out her classwork seemed like a poor choice since there usually wasn’t time to get anything substantial done, and attempting to read in the courtyard where people were often coming and going, chattering and laughing, was a lost cause. Talking to people, however, was something Mer didn’t even know how to begin, and she couldn’t imagine approaching anyone in the courtyard even now. Sure she saw some faces from the hallway, and maybe one or two were even in her class, but broaching a conversation seemed too much out of her comfort zone for a morning endeavor.
It was then that, while idling by the courtyard gates, conflicted about what exactly she should do with her newfound time, Mer heard a familiar, bubbly voice shout her name.
“Ava! Good morning!” Mer grinned, genuinely glad to see a face as friendly as Ava’s. Ava’s open enthusiasm was a trait she knew she’d do well to learn from, and it made time spent around her only that much more enjoyable.
The request for lunch, though, surprised Mer a little. The state of her stomach had been the last thing on her mind, having just eaten breakfast, and she couldn’t exactly predict how hungry she’d be come lunchtime, but Mer figured it wasn’t a big deal.
“Sure, I probably do,” she said, sliding her backpack around to rummage through her lunch. Matpakke and an apple were on the menu, and luckily Mer had a habit of packaging her one-slice sandwiches separately.
“Here. And here’s an apple too. Hope it’s enough!”Handing Ava a packaged ham-and-bread-slice ‘sandwich’ and an apple, Mer made sure Ava put both items in her bag, not taking no for an answer at this point. Half her lunch didn’t seem like a big deal, and she didn’t tend to get too hungry at lunch anyway.
A shout in the courtyard caught Mer’s attention, and she looked over to see a boy scaling a tree—a
tree.
Her jaw dropped, and she grabbed Ava, tugging her along as she made for the base of the tree. She’d seen him in the hallways before, though not frequently. His hat, however, made him stick out like a sore thumb, and it was also why Mer could so readily pinpoint him in her memory. That said, what was he thinking, with a fedora on his head and the ground so far below him? Sure he might be making good progress up the tree, but coming down hard terrain was liable to be just as hard, if not more hazardous. ‘Suicidal’ was the word that came to mind, and Merja regretted it immediately because now she was only more alarmed by the entire scenario, baffled as she watched the boy laugh, as if finding the situation amusing in some incomprehensible way.
At the base of the tree, Mer looked around at the people who were either staring or gathering with her, wondering what she could do. Offer help? She didn’t exactly want to insult boy, but not offering didn’t sit right with her either.
“Should we do something?” Mer glanced to Ava for guidance. As the more outspoken of the two, surely Ava would have some solution to this madness, because Mer was completely and utterly lost.
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