Wolvena

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme Stirling

Esme looked over to the stairs behind Natalia when Annabeth suddenly appeared behind her. Esme instinctively reached around behind her and placed her hand on her gun, but didn’t draw it as she heard Annabeth’s words. She noticed Cason flinch and step back with the knife held out. She couldn’t blame him for acting in such a way after trying to be killed twice that night. She even saw Bobby react to Annabeth’s appearance. Esme rested her free hand on Sarah’s side to stop her growling, but never took her eyes off of Annabeth as she spoke to Cason, then asked what had happened.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Bobby put the hammer back down on his gun and toss it on his desk as he muttered, she on the other hand, didn’t release her hold on her gun. She may have felt the calm coming from Annabeth, but that didn’t mean she was going to relax her hold on her gun, especially with how weak she felt at that moment. Esme listened as Natalia explained what had gone on to Annabeth and what was currently happening. When Natalia mentioned they were in a waiting game right now and wanted Dean and Mika to come down in a good place, she silently nodded in agreement.

When it came to where she was going to sleep, she was still planning to go to a motel that was nearby. She didn’t think it was a good idea for her to try and spend the night here. Not to mention, a little space from everyone and their emotions would be nice. One question in her mind, though, was would Cason actually let her go to said motel without following her there to watch over her and hover? Only when the moment came up would she know for sure. Sighing softly as she felt her legs trying to give on her, she slowly slid down the side of Sarah to sit on the floor, then leaned against her.

She finally released her hold on her gun and crossed her arms over her chest, as Sarah laid down and curled around her protectively. Esme tilted her head down and closed her eyes. She knew if anything happened, Sarah would alert her and would also jump into action.

Supernatural - After The End

Esme Stirling

Esme had laughed along with him after she made her joking comment about him not being much fun. If she was being honest with herself, this was the most at ease she had felt in some time, and she didn’t want to go back to the way things used to be for her. This was just too good to give up. When Dean spoke about getting settled so everyone could loosen up she nodded, then ended up laughing a little harder then she should have to him saying she was definitely bunking with him. She watched him as he released her hand, opened the door, and got out of the car. She then killed the engine, tucked her keys in her jacket pocket, and got out herself.

After getting out and shutting the door. “I didn’t doubt that for a minute.” she said as she stretched out herself before Dean joined her and took her hand. A warm smile coming to her lips as he interlocked his fingers with hers. Esme listened as Dean spoke as they made their way to the door, giving a nod that she understood. “Do I look like someone to be steamrolled?” she asked with a smirk, not really expecting an answer from him. “But I’ll let you know if he does.” she smiled. She was a bit surprised how quickly the door opened after Dean had knocked on it, seeing Castiel behind the door, and he greeted them. “Castiel.” she replied before Dean spoke to him.

She stayed quiet as the two talked about Madison, her eyebrows raising slightly in surprise at what Castiel said as she stepped into the house when Castiel walked away. Esme continued to listen as the two talked, taking everything in that Castiel said about Madison and how he used Sam to test a theory. Her eyes narrowed a bit when Castiel pointed at her after saying Madison trusted her, but she wasn’t here to test his theory. “Meaning you would have sent me to wake her instead of Sam if I would have been here.” she stated bluntly. She only thought it natural since he knew Dean and Sam, better to risk her life than the ones he knew and cared for.

Her eyes traveled around the room, landing on the one door that was slightly open. She could hear faint voices coming from the room, meaning that’s the room they were in. Her eyes then fell back on Castiel, her softness from earlier gone. It was going to take her a bit to trust him, even if he was there to help them with Madison. She sighed inwardly and focused on her hand in Dean’s and their intertwined fingers. The atmosphere here was a bit heavy and she didn’t like it, thankfully she had something, rather someone she could focus on to keep her relatively calm while being here. Esme tightened her grip on Dean’s hand as she stood there next to him.

Sam Winchester

Sam had felt Madison flinch when he took her hands in his, he had watched her as he spoke. Seeing her read his face, her shoulders dropping, and her face softening at his words. As she whispered, he smiled warmly seeing he was getting through to her. He shook his head softly to her apology to say she didn’t have to apologize. He was about to say something when she suddenly leaned forward, pressed her face into his chest and hugged him. He hesitated for a moment before he put his arms around her and hugged her back, a small smile coming to his lips at her words.

He knew she was still learning when hugs were appropriate, though he knew this was a sign of her giving over her trust to him. He could honestly say he was relieved to know that she trusted him. It meant that he didn’t have to be so on his toes or walk on eggshells when around her. “You don’t have to apologize for that. It was a natural reaction.” he told her softly as he rubbed her back. “And you’re welcome.” He turned his head to the door after a moment when he heard voices drifting through it and into the room. “Looks like they finally made it here,” he whispered.

He even heard Esme speak up and she didn’t sound all that happy when she spoke. Her tone was quite different from when he spoke to her at the motel and she was carrying on with Dean. Sam wondered what could have happened to have changed her mood since then. He then looked down at Madison. “Should we go and see what’s going on in there?”

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme Stirling

Esme’s attention was pulled from Cason as Dean came back through the door. She could see he was a man on a mission. She watched him ascend the stairs until he was out of sight. She dropped her gaze to Sarah, who she was still leaning against, and closed her eyes briefly with a sigh. She hoped Dean could work things out with Mika after everything that went on tonight, she’d hate to see their relationship ruined just because of what Cupid had done. She opened her eyes and looked back over at Cason. Just as he raised his hand to slap the sigil, Esme shielded her eyes from the bright light that emitted from the sigil as Cason slapped it.

Then she heard the scream as it banished Cupid. Esme let her arm drop from her face and looked at Cason as he spoke. She couldn’t help but sigh in relief that Cupid was gone and wouldn’t be causing anymore problems for them. “Glad to hear it.” she mumbled as he wrapped up his hand. “I almost hate to say it, but that is music to my ears.” She then saw Natalia enter from the corner of her eye. She was hesitant to look at the woman after everything, even after she spoke to Cason. Though when she spoke to her, she slowly turned her gaze to Natalia, a soft look on her features.

“You’re welcome.” she replied. “I only did what anyone with a heart would do.” She turned her gaze back to the stairs just as Sam came in and Natalia told him Dean and Mika were upstairs in their room. When Sam went up, her gaze dropped back to Sarah. What she told Natalia was true when she saw Dean that day. She couldn’t bring herself to leave him alone in the state she had found him in. She closed her eyes as the memory played behind her eyes of that day. He was so broken, and he was drowning himself in booze. The state of him pulled at her heartstrings and still did to this day.

Anyone that would listen to him, he’d ask them to end his misery by killing him. He had even asked her. Esme shook her head softly to rid it of the memory and opened her eyes to see Sarah looking at her sadly. She patted the hound's side to let her know she was alright, which she responded to with a nuzzle to Esme’s side. She looked away from Sarah and looked around the room. It still looked like a disaster area from when the demons attacked, which made her think of when she had become a demon nuke. She was so ready for the day to end. She just wanted to find a bed, curl up in and go to sleep and forget everything. Would she even wake up tomorrow or would she sleep for several days after everything her emotions and Cupid had put her through today?

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme Stirling

At Cason’s confession, Esme had turned her face away from him, laid her head on the floor and closed her eyes. No wonder Dean was so irate and went after Cason, trying to kill him. She sighed heavily as she laid on the floor, still under the weight of Sarah. She knew Sarah would not let her up until she was completely free of her rage, but she had finally released her arms. Esme lifted her arms and put her hands on her aching head, feeling Sarah’s snout under her chin, and her breath on her chin and neck. She could still feel rage coursing through her, but not as bad as it was, thanks to Sarah.

The heat that had been radiating from her body had died off, which meant she wouldn’t go nuclear any time soon. Then she heard it and a groan escaped her lips. Cupid had struck again. Moving her hands slightly, she looked at the stairs as she heard the faint melody traveling down them. Her eyes went from the stairs to Cason as he quickly stood from the couch. She watched him as he moved around the room, then painted the sigil on a door. She recognized it from the hotel room they had all met in. Cason was planning on banishing Cupid. Esme turned her gaze from Cason to Sarah, their noses almost touching as Esme looked at her.

She removed her hands from her head and sat them on Sarah’s neck, then gave her a hug. “I’m good now. You can let me up.” she told her softly, giving her a pat. Sarah nuzzled Esme before slowly and easily lifting herself off of Esme and moving to the side. Esme slowly rose to a sitting position, then got to her feet with the help of Sarah. She leaned against Sarah for support, feeling drained from feeling so much rage and having it hit her so quickly. Her attention went back to the stairs when she heard the melody come to a stop, then sighed deeply as she looked over at Cason again. “When do you plan on using that?” she asked him. “And how close does he have to be for it to work?”

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme Stirling

Esme watched Dean continue to storm away as he shrugged everyone off. Then she turned to Natalia as she went to follow Dean and stopped at her side and placed a hand on her shoulder. Esme nodded to her words and watched her go after Dean. Esme turned back to Cason, seeing Bobby helping him to his feet, and sent him to the couch. Her gaze followed him, a fire still burning within them as she stared at him as he sat down. She stood there thinking about what Cason could have possibly done to piss Dean off so badly as to have him try and kill him. “What the hell did you do to piss him off so bad, Cason?!” she asked at the same time Mika mumbled to him.

She didn’t catch what the woman said, but saw her quickly ascend the stairs to get away from everyone. It was then she heard Sarah and Violet fighting with each other to get through the door. She turned to look just as they made it through, to see Sarah running at her and hopped up on her, knocking her to the floor on her ass with a thud and hiss. Esme looked at the hellhound that now laid on her legs, pinning her in place. “Sarah, get your ass off of me!” she growled at the hound. It was clear the rage still had a firm hold on her, even with Dean out of the room.

She tried to shove Sarah off of her, but Sarah only inched her way up with a whine in her throat. Esme fought to get out from under Sarah, but was failing miserably. “I said get off of me!” she grumbled. Eventually, Sarah made it where she was laying the length of Esme’s body, where her body was mostly on Esme’s legs and waist, her head on her torso, and her paws holding down Esme’s arms. Esme was completely pinned, but could still breathe under Sarah’s weight. Esme growled under the weight of Sarah and the fact that she wouldn’t get off of her, no matter how much she struggled or told her to get off.

Finally, Esme sighed heavily and laid her head back on the floor, as she could feel herself calming and the rage leaving her. It was then she noticed her fists were still balled tightly. She forced herself to relax her hands and breathe deeply as she closed her eyes. As the rage left her little by little, she could feel her body trembling from its effects. Never had she been so affected by rage in this way before, and now, with a clear mind, she actually scared herself with how angry she had gotten. She could think clearly about Dean’s actions as well, and that scared her as well.

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme Stirling

Esme continued to stare down the two in front of her on the floor, the rage within her still rising from what she felt in the room. She barely noticed the others in the room at this point. The rage she was feeling almost completely blocked them out, but she could still hear their voices pleading with Dean. She noticed Cason had flinched when he heard her voice, causing the blade Dean held to cut into his neck. Her fists clenched more when it seemed nothing was getting through to Dean, her nails breaking through the skin on her palms. Esme’s eyes went to Dean, and she tried to rein back some of the anger from her tone.

“Dean, don’t do this!” she said to him. She hoped that at least someone in the room would get through to him. Then he finally looked at Mika and she also saw him flinch at Natalia’s touch. This was a good sign that they were getting through to him, but this didn’t calm her rage much. Not even the shivering of Cason under Dean’s weight calmed her rage. Her eyes stayed focused on Dean and the two women at his side. She would have gone over too, but knew that would be a terrible idea with what she was feeling now. Any closer to the source of the rage could possibly end in disaster for everyone in the room.

So she hung back and let the two try to get through to him, but then she saw Dean glare at Mika. This was a Dean she didn’t know. It was a side of him she never saw while they were together. If she hadn’t been so full of rage at that moment, it would have scared her seeing him this way. When Dean shook off Natalia and pushed Bobby back, her eyes went to the knife as he raised it in the air. She took a step forward just as he brought it down, her eyes going to Cason at the sound of the crack. She saw the knife wiggling in the floor just centimeters from Cason’s face and her eyes narrowed.

Esme’s focus went back to Dean as he lifted himself off Cason and made his way towards her, then shrugged past her as Bobby asked him a question. Esme turned and looked at him, her rage just barely starting to come down. “Dean!” she called as he walked away from them. “Wait, Dean! Talk to us!” She knew something big must have happened to have Dean react in such a way, but what it was she couldn’t begin to imagine.

Supernatural - After The End

Esme Stirling

Esme had also stayed pretty quiet on the way to the safe house. She was enjoying Dean’s company as well as his touch. As she drove, she would occasionally look over and see him trying not to fall asleep as she rubbed his hand. She couldn’t help but smile at the effect her touch had on him. After she asked her question, she looked over and saw his smirk in response to her words and her stomach, then nodded at his words with a small smile as she looked back at the road. She could see Sam as one to get over it, but not too quickly. Castiel, on the other hand, was a little harder for her to read being an angel and all.

She trusted Dean could handle whatever happened with Castiel when they reached the safe house. As Dean continued to talk, she looked over, catching his eye roll before he looked at her and she smiled. “I see…... With what I’ve seen of Sam, it does seem like one could get bored easily if left alone with him for too long.” she said as she looked back at the road. “You on the other hand….” she trailed off purposely with a smirk on her lips. They were quickly closing the gap between them and the safe house, and she was still smirking at her comment to Dean. When they reached the safe house, she pulled in and parked the car, then looked at the place she would be staying for a bit, taking it all in. Esme then turned to Dean with a warm smile and gave his hand a squeeze. “Ready?” she asked, giving his hand an affectionate squeeze.

Sam Winchester

Sam watched Madison as he sat there, focusing on her face as she took in his words of just checking on her. He caught the flash of gold in her eyes, but didn’t make any move to show that he saw. He was honestly glad that she didn’t lose it after looking so concerned about something being wrong when he woke her. He stayed quiet as she answered his question, nodding in understanding as she told him what she saw. He was about to ask another question when she picked up his hand off the mattress. He watched her as she played with his fingers, then looked up into her eyes as she spoke once again.

A soft sigh escaped his nose at her words. He could see how hard it was for her and it tore at him. Sam gave a small smile as he took her hand in both of his, giving it a small squeeze to comfort her. “I know it's scary and I’ve seen the looks. I know I’ve even had the look.” he said softly. “But I can see how hard you’re trying to learn and you’re making good progress.” He paused to study her face to see if any of what he said was helping or making things worse. He looked down for a moment at their hands, then looked back up into her face. “I know you wouldn’t hurt any of us, but you have to know it could happen if you ever lose control. But know, I’ll be here to help you through it if it happens…. I won’t leave you alone. I promise you that.” he told her warmly.

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme Stirling

Esme was close to being completely calm thanks to Sarah and Violet being curled around her. But a growl from the two hounds disrupted the calm as they lifted their heads and looked towards the door. Esme lifted her head from her hands and looked towards the front door, now hearing the scuffle coming from inside the house. She dropped her head with a sigh and shook it. This was no time to have a fight break out among them. “Easy girls.” she said, placing a hand on each of their heads as she looked at them. She patted them silently to let them know she wanted to get up, then moved and helped her with a low growl still in their throats.

“It’s alright, we’ll get this sorted. Just stay here and I’ll call if I need you.” she told them before walking to the door. She could hear the raised voices coming from the house, and could tell who each one belonged to. The closer she got to the door, she could tell who was involved in the fight and a knot formed in her stomach. As soon as she walked through the door, she stopped in her tracks as it hit her and stole her breath, pure and unbridled rage. It hit her harder than a ton of bricks, almost bringing her to knees by the sheer force of it. She held onto the door frame, not able to stop the rage from taking her over.

She could feel it bubbling up within her and making her chest burn as if a fire were raging within it. Esme lifted her gaze from the floor to look at Dean and Cason just as Dean put the blade to Cason’s throat, her eyes narrowing at the two with a fire raging within her blue eyes as they shot daggers. She could feel her body heating up from the rage now coursing through her and was steadily losing control of. Esme pushed herself off the door frame, taking a few more steps into the house, trying to keep herself from going over the edge. She stared at the two on the floor as Cason spoke to Dean, her eyes narrowed more.

Then her eye cut briefly to Bobby as he screamed at Dean and gripped the back of his neck. She lost it as he said no one was dying in the house tonight. Heat radiated off her body as she stared down Dean and Cason with a glare, the fire within her eyes growing stronger. “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU TWO!” she screamed at them at the top of her lungs as she clenched her fists tight. “THIS IS NO TIME TO BE FIGHTING AMONG OURSELVES WITH EVERYTHING GOING ON!” Her eyes darted between them as she continued to stare them down, her fists clenched more, her nails digging into her palms, but she didn’t notice. “NOW STOP! BOTH OF YOU!”

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme Stirling

Esme hung back while Dean and Bobby talked, not really paying attention to what they said for still being in her thoughts. Though she could feel the emotions radiating off of them, she could feel them through the entire house. She sighed inwardly once again as she stood there. If she was honest with herself, she would much rather be out on the front porch than inside the house. She could feel far less while outside and could actually relax a little, but being in the house, she felt like she couldn’t relax at all without fear of being overwhelmed again. When Dean walked away and stomped through the kitchen, she watched him till he was out of sight, then averted her gaze to a wall and stared at it.

She mentally kicked herself for staying so long and for kissing him back at the bar. She knew she should have pushed him back and not have returned his kiss, but she couldn’t fight against it as if her actions weren’t her own. She knew that her returning his kiss had only made things worse, but there was nothing she could do about it now. It happened and Mika and Natalia saw. Esme was about to turn and head to either the couch or the porch when Cason seemed to appear out of nowhere and take her hand, then kissed her knuckles and spoke. She looked at him, her eyes filled with a mixture of emotions, mostly pain, sorrow, and guilt.

“Don’t remind me.” she mumbled with a heavy sigh. She looked at her hand he still held and gently pulled it from his hand, then tucked both of hands into the pockets of her jacket. She really didn’t want to be touched at that moment, for it only seemed to amplify her emotions and those of the others. She had hit the point where she wished she couldn’t feel a damn thing. She just wanted to be numb to everything around her. She couldn’t stop the flashes of her and Dean singing to each other from flooding her mind once again. Shaking them from her head, she looked back at Cason briefly before looking at the front door.

“I can’t stay in here. I need to get outside so I can breathe.” she mumbled. Without waiting for a response from him, she gently made her way around him and out the door to the porch. Esme then sat down on the steps, closed her eyes and took a long deep breath of the cool air through her nose, then slowly let it out through her mouth. She was hoping it would have more of an effect, but it didn’t. She still felt the same as she did before. Opening her eyes, she looked out over the junkyard, waiting for Cason to walk out and join her like he had before. By now, she knew he wouldn’t want to leave her alone in the state she was in.

As she sat there, she brought her knees up and rested her crossed arms on them as she leaned forward. It was then, she saw Sarah and Violet walking up from the distance. She gave a small weak smile to both of them when they reached the porch. “Hey girls.” she whispered softly to them. The two hellhounds closed the distance between them and nuzzled Esme with a small whine as she placed an arm around each of them and laid her head against theirs. She couldn’t stop the sigh that escaped her at the sudden relief she felt with them near. It was strange how everything seemed to be drowned out by their presence, she couldn’t feel all the emotions bearing down on her from everyone in the house, she could breathe and actually fully relax for once that night.

Esme breathed in deeply, feeling herself relaxing more and more with them being close and blocking everything from reaching her. “Please stay close. You two are helping in blocking out everything I'm feeling.” she whispered to them so only they could hear. Esme lifted her head as they nuzzled her again and moved around her into more comfortable positions and curled around her protectively. She then placed her elbows on her knees, rested her chin in her hands, closed her eyes and let out a breath through her nose. Now relaxing, she could feel just how mentally and physically exhausted she was from everything.

She felt like she was in a protective bubble with the two hounds curled around her. Never in a million years did she think she’d be so grateful to have hellhounds around. After a little time, Esme opened her eyes and looked out at her car in the distance, taking in how the moonlight played with the color of the paint. “I never should have followed Natalia and stayed as long as I have.” she whispered as she sank into the comfort of the hounds. “I don’t even know why I’m still here.” In the back of her mind, she knew why she was here, it was because Dean had begged her to stay and she told him she would stay.

Supernatural - Hell On The Horizon

Esme Stirling

Esme had listened to Dean’s voice as she tried to calm her down, him calling her baby girl replayed in her thoughts. She remembered him holding her like this and stroking hair whenever she would have moments of painful reflection. After she had calmed and he took her face in his hands and rolled his head against her forehead, she looked into his face as he pressed his forehead against hers. “Alright, sounds like a plan.” she whispered as he pulled back. She watched him as he pulled her arms from around him, which she didn’t fight, then wrapped her left arm around his. As they walked, she held onto his arm, almost leaning into him for comfort.
__________

When they reached the house, she almost sighed at the same time Dean did. Like Dean, she was waiting for Mika to pop out and ambush Dean, or even her, from the night's events as they walked into the house. She looked around the house, only seeing Bobby and Natalia inside. She relaxed a bit, realizing Mika wasn’t inside the house, but wondered where she was. After Dean asked his questions, she followed his gaze and saw Mika pass by the window in the kitchen. She couldn’t help but wonder about her, since she left them a while ago. She looked at Natalia, seeing the disappointment in her eyes, and listened to her words.

They hit her hard. Even though Dean had told her that this was on him, she still felt like she played a major part in all of it. If she hadn't followed Natalia from the hotel she met her in and showed up at the motel where they had all met up, none of this would have happened. She would still be on the road on her own, thinking Dean was dead, but they would be fine and Mika wouldn’t have to worry about her coming between her and Dean. She sighed inwardly at the thought as it played out in her mind.