1 Guest viewing this page
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
Raw
GM
Avatar of kapuchu

kapuchu The Loremaster

Member Seen 16 hrs ago

Bah. Missed the bus. I'll give it a look while I wait for the next one.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
Raw
GM
Avatar of kapuchu

kapuchu The Loremaster

Member Seen 16 hrs ago

Alrght, well one thing jumps at me almost immediately: His appearance. You're writing his Appearance as if he's an Elf or somethin along those lines, but he can't be. The Mythics flat out refused to fight for the Humans and Earth, but offered to "awaken" their own magic (via the Shifter Process) to give them a fighting chance. Sindri is a human, not an elf. So he doesn't have elfine ears or stuff like that.

Secondly is that you only have one Shifter form. That's one of the differences between this one, and Shifting Worlds. One "form" only. And his powers... At least his Glamour Power is basically mind control, and while such things might exist to an extent, I feels a bit too powerful with how they can't do anything to resist if they've fallen for it. I know that you said that it won't work on all Shifters, but I'd still like if you at least added that it isn't an instant win button against those who doesn't automatically resist it. You don't have to tone it down so much as make it clear that you can't just make everyone commit suicide without effort.

Anywho, the next bus is coming soon so I'll stop here. I'll read the Background and Personality when I get home.

Oh, and one more thing, can you make the "Background" "Personality" "Powers" etc bold? The [ b][/b] thing (without the space in the first one). It makes it much easier to read and see where something ends and begins.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by EldritchOne
Raw
Avatar of EldritchOne

EldritchOne Nephren-Ka Was Here Bruh.

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

kapuchu said
Alrght, well one thing jumps at me almost immediately: His appearance. You're writing his Appearance as if he's an Elf or somethin along those lines, but he can't be. The Mythics flat out refused to fight for the Humans and Earth, but offered to "awaken" their own magic (via the Shifter Process) to give them a fighting chance. Sindri is a human, not an elf. So he doesn't have elfine ears or stuff like that. Secondly is that you only have one Shifter form. That's one of the differences between this one, and Shifting Worlds. One "form" only. And his powers... At least his Glamour Power is basically mind control, and while such things might exist to an extent, I feels a bit too powerful with how they can't do anything to resist if they've fallen for it. I know that you said that it won't work on all Shifters, but I'd still like if you at least added that it isn't an instant win button against those who doesn't automatically resist it. You don't have to tone it down so much as make it clear that you can't just make everyone commit suicide without effort.Anywho, the next bus is coming soon so I'll stop here. I'll read the Background and Personality when I get home.Oh, and one more thing, can you make the "Background" "Personality" "Powers" etc bold? The [ b][/b] thing (without the space in the first one). It makes it much easier to read and see where something ends and begins.


Sure, I'll begin work on it, the appearance traits were more a suggestion that some level of his Shifter form melts into him a bit, unless we weren't keeping such attributes since the last game.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by EldritchOne
Raw
Avatar of EldritchOne

EldritchOne Nephren-Ka Was Here Bruh.

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

I reworked some of it, for brevities sake I'll list the changes:

Appearence: You asked to get rid of the more obvious aspects of faeish qualities, so I did, still looks pretty uncanny however, but people can have that sort of quality in real life already without any connections with the fae, so I don't see any issue with maintaining the weird thin body and some elfin features given they already exist.

Shifter Appearence: No two distinct forms now, now his angelic form is basically him using illusions and glamour to make himself look better in the perspective of others, his true nature is the other form and people who are able to see past his trickery won't be fooled by this show.

Powers: The glamour spell is now - I always was - resistible, Strong willed characters can resist its alluring effects and maintain their mental integrity, but this causes them considerable strain. Powerful spellcasters can also work their way around it, some even having the ability to simply brush the effects aside as if nothing happened. Given the strong willed can resist it, its an unspoken fact that they could also resist his commands also, including acts of suicide and self mutilation, its just hard.

The mental assault spell can now be resisted by those with pain resistance, but that doesn't make them feel particularly coherent, but definitely enough that they could manage to distract him from casting and lead to a chink in his armour.

Other: I [b][b]'d.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
Raw
GM
Avatar of kapuchu

kapuchu The Loremaster

Member Seen 16 hrs ago

Alright... slightly fucked up, but interesting character to be sure. I assume his strange view of reality and his morals is a result of obsession with the Otherworld and the Fae, mixed with the sadness/semi-depression of his Parents' deaths? He's not so much out of line that the Academy will kick him out. At least, he stays in line because he saw the scary side of the otherwise kind Sylphide (she's in some ways similar to Sindri, in that she is kind and gentle, but she, like any other, is capable of getting angry... and people should know never to piss off one of the Fae).

There are two, relatively minor, things that I took notice of. One is his sharpened teeth. I looked it up and I couldn't really find anything about such things occurring naturally, at least not to the extend that I think you intend. If, however, it's just somewhat larger canines, or filed teeth, then it's alright. The most I've been able to find about naturally sharp/jagged teeth is something like this.

Aside from that, I'd say he's pretty much approved.

There is, however, one last thing which I assume is a typo.
and can be sometimes simply brushed aside by adept Fae.

You mean "Shifter" not "Fae" right? Because not all Fae use powers similar to his, and others such as Demons (or Spirits) might even use stuff similar to that. The will of the target (and their perception of "true reality") is what should determine if they can break it. Not their magic and powers.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by EldritchOne
Raw
Avatar of EldritchOne

EldritchOne Nephren-Ka Was Here Bruh.

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

kapuchu said
Alright... slightly fucked up, but interesting character to be sure. I assume his strange view of reality and his morals is a result of obsession with the Otherworld and the Fae, mixed with the sadness/semi-depression of his Parents' deaths? He's not so much out of line that the Academy will kick him out. At least, he stays in line because he saw the scary side of the otherwise kind Sylphide (she's in some ways similar to Sindri, in that she is kind and gentle, but she, like any other, is capable of getting angry... and people should know never to piss off one of the Fae). There are two, relatively minor, things that I took notice of. One is his sharpened teeth. I looked it up and I couldn't really find anything about such things occurring naturally, at least not to If, however, it's just somewhat larger canines, or filed teeth, then it's alright. The most I've been able to find about naturally sharp/jagged teeth is . Aside from that, I'd say he's pretty much approved. There is, however, one last thing which I assume is a typo.You mean "Shifter" not "Fae" right? Because not all Fae use powers similar to his, and others such as Demons (or Spirits) might even use stuff similar to that. The will of the target (and their perception of "true reality") is what should determine if they can break it. Not their magic and powers.


1) Yep, to the above point, basically held in line by his own neurosis and his fear of Sylphide, and his personality is a result of his obsessions and dislocation from friends and family, especially his folks deaths.

2)regarding the teeth, its actually a real thing which people used to do, I think most notably Aztec warriors who used to sharpen them to points, although I'd say his canines would also be somewhat large. It wasn't really meant to be naturally occurring, just something weird he did in his spare time.

3)Regarding the second point, I think its a typo, I meant that more experienced shifters and magic users could get pasted his work pretty easily simply because of determination and will power. I sort of figured when Sylphide dealt with him that she'd basically nullified his work in a "I ain't got time for this bullshit" sort of way, basically I figured the more magically attuned would have better defenses against his reality bending mindfuck abilities.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
Raw
GM
Avatar of kapuchu

kapuchu The Loremaster

Member Seen 16 hrs ago

So the teeth are filed down? Alright. As for the whole Sylphide thing... Yeah. She pretty much waved her hand and, as you so eloquently put it, swept it a side in "Ain't got time for this bullshit" kinda way :p

Also, check your PM. Sent you a message. I'll have him added to the Approved list in a moment.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by EldritchOne
Raw
Avatar of EldritchOne

EldritchOne Nephren-Ka Was Here Bruh.

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

kapuchu said
So the teeth are filed down? Alright. As for the whole Sylphide thing... Yeah. She pretty much waved her hand and, as you so eloquently put it, swept it a side in "Ain't got time for this bullshit" kinda way :p Also, check your PM. Sent you a message. I'll have him added to the Approved list in a moment.


Sweet!

And yeah, I got yer PM, responded a couple of minutes ago, I think its going to be fun.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Bweoti
Raw

Bweoti

Member Seen 6 yrs ago

So, five accepted characters. Do we have any others in the works? How many do you intend on having before we start the IC?
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
Raw
GM
Avatar of kapuchu

kapuchu The Loremaster

Member Seen 16 hrs ago

There's still LittleMist, but haven't heard from her since I replied to her character. Then there's Wilson and Feisty-Pants, although I haven't gotten any reply from Feisty after I offered her a spot. She's online atm, but I dunno if she's ignoring me or just hasn't noticed my PM.

Anywho, I think as soon as we get one more person we can begin. I like between 6 & 8 players.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Frenetic Raptor
Raw

Frenetic Raptor

Member Seen 7 yrs ago

Don't forget me just yet. Just know I am really, really, really trying to hurry with Felicia's character sheet. This may get messy, so do stay clear, as I can't guarantee that the background won't be completely shredded to pieces by the time I am done.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
Raw
GM
Avatar of kapuchu

kapuchu The Loremaster

Member Seen 16 hrs ago

Frenetic Raptor said
Don't forget me just yet. Just know I am really, really, trying to hurry with Felicia's character sheet. This may get messy, so do stay clear, as I can't guarantee that the background won't be completely shredded to pieces by the time I am done.


soooorry <.< You're the kind of person who stays so silent that I forgot about you xD You still have your spot, of course xP
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Frenetic Raptor
Raw

Frenetic Raptor

Member Seen 7 yrs ago

Hmm, let me see about that......
yeah, I suppose I can forgive you this time. xP

Though if that is the only problem, then let the whirlwind of posts commence.
Kapuchu shall be forgetful no more.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
Raw
GM
Avatar of kapuchu

kapuchu The Loremaster

Member Seen 16 hrs ago

Nah, I'll wait for your character to get up (and approved) :p Then we might be able to start with the RP itself.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by WilsonTurner
Raw
Avatar of WilsonTurner

WilsonTurner AKA / OfWindAndRain

Member Seen 7 yrs ago

Bweoti said
So, five accepted characters. Do we have any others in the works? How many do you intend on having before we start the IC?


Working on mine.
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Antediluvixen
Raw
coGM
Avatar of Antediluvixen

Antediluvixen Kemonomimi Dystopia Creator

Member Seen 21 days ago

*Hyped-ness Intensifies*
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by EldritchOne
Raw
Avatar of EldritchOne

EldritchOne Nephren-Ka Was Here Bruh.

Member Seen 5 yrs ago

Worlds Collide- The Hypening
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
Raw
GM
Avatar of kapuchu

kapuchu The Loremaster

Member Seen 16 hrs ago

That reminds me... You guys notice the "Legends became reality, and now we fight" line in the top of the first post?

I considered writing "A Whole New World"
Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by Antediluvixen
Raw
coGM
Avatar of Antediluvixen

Antediluvixen Kemonomimi Dystopia Creator

Member Seen 21 days ago

kapuchu said
That reminds me... You guys notice the "Legends became reality, and now we fight" line in the top of the first post? I considered writing "A Whole New World"


Hidden 10 yrs ago Post by kapuchu
Raw
GM
Avatar of kapuchu

kapuchu The Loremaster

Member Seen 16 hrs ago

Monochromatic Rainbow said



Aaaaw. Why not? xD
↑ Top
1 Guest viewing this page
© 2007-2024
BBCode Cheatsheet