Oh, okay. That makes sense.
Spookyhat said
Not to be picky or anything, but Rocket's post seemed a bit rushed and didn't describe his character in any way, merely rehashing what had already been said. I would suggest you go into detail about his character for a short bit through a minor action or reaction, and then put fuckloads of compound, complex, and other sentences in there instead of having run-ons. Try and pad it with unnecessary details with a lot of separate sentences that actually mean important things.Sorry, but as a very poor writer, I like to force my self-criticisms on others. And take all advice with a few grains of salt: personal style is something everybody should encourage.
rocketrobie2 said
I appreciate the criticism :) Sorry about that I'm not the strongest writer but I'll go back and try to make it better.
Spookyhat said
It's alright, I started out awful, but after two years of doing RPs and writing chapter-based narrative you sort of get the hang of potholes to avoid. If you need it, I can edit your posts and give feedback. That's what I do for my friends' writings.
rocketrobie2 said
Sure I'd like that. I'm fairly new to the whole roleplaying thing.