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Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by The Mad Hatter
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I am...extremely conflicted on if I want to join or not.


Oh? Why's that?
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by NobodiesHero
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NobodiesHero The Organization XIII Member That Never Was

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@The Mad Hatter Fixed the typo, thanks for pointing it out. Sometimes my brain gets ahead of my fingers when I write and I accidentally leave words out.

Changed Shadow Clone to regular Clone because I forgot that it was a forbidden techinique since Naruto uses it so much and I can't think of a good reason why someone like him would have it. I also bumped up the number of clones by one to make up for it.

Added in the Japanese name for Reflect. Thanks for that too. Not even trying to find the Japanese version of the spell from Final Fantasy helped me find the word I was looking for.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by LordVoldemort
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LordVoldemort Lord of the Mice

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<Snipped quote by LordVoldemort>

Oh? Why's that?


I really want to join it because it's Naruto. On the other hand, Naruto Rps don't tend to stay alive long...
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by The Mad Hatter
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<Snipped quote by The Mad Hatter>

I really want to join it because it's Naruto. On the other hand, Naruto Rps don't tend to stay alive long...


Ah, yes. I usually have the same problem. GMs vanishing, players dropping like flies till no ones left, one player causing irreparable damage to the world.
I can't assure you that someone won't kill it somehow, but I can assure you that I'll do everything in my power to keep it alive. Even if everyone else drops and leaves just me and Halvtand playing with each other until someone else comes along, that's what I'm willing to do.

Where nothing ventures, nothing is gained. It's up to you, though.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by LordVoldemort
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<Snipped quote by LordVoldemort>

Ah, yes. I usually have the same problem. GMs vanishing, players dropping like flies till no ones left, one player causing irreparable damage to the world.
I can't assure you that someone won't kill it somehow, but I can assure you that I'll do everything in my power to keep it alive. Even if everyone else drops and leaves just me and Halvtand playing with each other until someone else comes along, that's what I'm willing to do.

Where nothing ventures, nothing is gained. It's up to you, though.


Alright. I guess I could give it a shot. I have a question, though; how many paragraphs or so are expected from this Rp? I'm not exactly a heavy writer, but I can pull off a paragraph or two depending on what's happening ICly.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by The Mad Hatter
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<Snipped quote by The Mad Hatter>

Alright. I guess I could give it a shot. I have a question, though; how many paragraphs or so are expected from this Rp? I'm not exactly a heavy writer, but I can pull off a paragraph or two depending on what's happening ICly.


Nice.
We're expecting a couple of paragraphs, but the quantity of text doesn't really matter as much as the quality. If you, once in a while, cannot manage more than a single paragraph, that would be okay, as long as you have a satisfactory amount of detail in there. I get that it can be hard to write a whole damn wall of text as response to someone asking "How was your day" or some shit like that. We just expect that you really pour your character into your posts.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by LordVoldemort
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<Snipped quote by LordVoldemort>

Nice.
We're expecting a couple of paragraphs, but the quantity of text doesn't really matter as much as the quality. If you, once in a while, cannot manage more than a single paragraph, that would be okay, as long as you have a satisfactory amount of detail in there. I get that it can be hard to write a whole damn wall of text as response to someone asking "How was your day" or some shit like that. We just expect that you really pour your character into your posts.


Alright. I'll try and cook up a character and see what I can do. You alright with an Uchiha, provide I give a good explanation for why they're there in the first place?
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by The Mad Hatter
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<Snipped quote by The Mad Hatter>

Alright. I'll try and cook up a character and see what I can do. You alright with an Uchiha, provide I give a good explanation for why they're there in the first place?


Yes, that's fine.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by LordVoldemort
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<Snipped quote by LordVoldemort>

Yes, that's fine.


As a side-note, do we have to start as Chunin?
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Halvtand
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As a side-note, do we have to start as Chunin?


No. But it would help if your character is somewhat on the same wavelength as the other characters. Most will be around chuunin level (it is a very rough estimate), so going full Madara or retard-Naruto could be frowned upon. As per the canon, one can be a genin and still be on the level of chuunin. The rank of jounin is off-limits however as it could create a power-struggle in the village that we don't want.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by LordVoldemort
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<Snipped quote by LordVoldemort>

No. But it would help if your character is somewhat on the same wavelength as the other characters. Most will be around chuunin level (it is a very rough estimate), so going full Madara or retard-Naruto could be frowned upon. As per the canon, one can be a genin and still be on the level of chuunin. The rank of jounin is off-limits however as it could create a power-struggle in the village that we don't want.


Right. I was actually looking to be a little bit lower than Chunin and not above it. I like to have a lower rank in things because I think it gives more room for development.
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by The Mad Hatter
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@LordVoldemort
I love you

@NobodiesHero


@BladeSS4
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by Halvtand
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Sorry for not being too in-depth about this. I have a lot to do today and should probably not even put this much time into the RP at this second, but I wanted to give you guys something to work with.

@NobodiesHero
Over all good character, the hat has pointed out some things. I've looked at your custom technique and I like it. I would however like to add a restriction to it, one that deals with strength. Currently your jutsu is rank C, so I'd like it if it can only deflect techniques of that rank (or lower). As you practice it will get stronger.

@BladeSS4
You have a good concept going, but the character in itself needs some more time put into it. For one you need to put some explanations into your background. Right now it is full of stuff that happens, but we don't know how or why. Example questions: Why did his mother leave? Why was he avoided after discovering the KG? What happened to his father? How did he find Gobi? Why did he stay?
Keep in mind that Sasuke was also discovered to possess two chakra natures and a KG as a genin, he was cheered.

The custom technique. I like the basic sound of it, and you've done a pretty good job of balancing it. I would however like to restrict it even further to make sure that it won't become a "And so I killed everyone"-technique. The restriction is really simple, just bump the 3 sec time limit down to one strike.

Ranton/storm release. Let's just get one thing out of the way. Canon Ranton is strong as shit. It has been unfairly portrayed, since we only started to see it during the war and performed by some of the strongest ninjas in the world. This means that the only techniques we've seen are probably the strongest ones in the element's library.
With this in mind I can't really get behind a chuunin knowing some of the techniques that you've chosen. Laser circus was performed by one of hidden cloud's best people, and Water Lightning Dragon Bullet by two kages in collaboration.
Like I said, the element has been unfairly portrayed and it's not your fault in any way. If these techniques could be reworked, scaled back to a B-rank or something like that, I would not be opposed to the thought of a chuunin with the storm element.

Also, hat beat me to it. Busted, we talk about this shit.
Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by BladeSS4
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I think I fixed most of the problems you had with it. The history could still use more beefing up I will admit that. As for the Jutsu, I think I fixed the format of them. Unless you want me to go and break down each of the canon jutsu into the same format as the custom one. Let me know if there is anything else or what more I have to do to make the Character sheet acceptable.

Edit- I'll bump the Jutsu down a bit and remove the laser circus, and the dragon bullet. Had trouble finding actual canon Jutsu for the Storm Release.
Edit Again- Ok now I think I have things fixed. Beefed up the history more explained what happened to his father and why he decided to stay in the Village of the End.
Edit 3- Moving the character sheet here after editing the bits of his mother and why he was treated the way he was even when he should have been celebrated for his abilities.

1x Thank Thank
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by The Mad Hatter
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@BladeSS4
Yeah, he seems good now. Congrats on having our first Accepted character You are free to move him to the Character Tab.

I do want to make it clear to you that we expect a bit more depth when it comes to your posts, than what you have shown in the CS.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by BladeSS4
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@The Mad Hatter
Yeah I figured as much, when it comes to in character posts. I'm a bit better when it comes to making an posts that don't deal with Character sheets.

Now the Kenjutsu Storm user is ready. It's going to be interesting to see how he can be used within this small village.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by The Mad Hatter
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I made a Discord, despite the fact that I loathe it with passion, so I won't accidentially clutter the OOC with ranting about how awesome my little Haru-chan is.

Hidden 7 yrs ago 7 yrs ago Post by LordVoldemort
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This is currently a WIP. I have to go over to the County Office to do something, so I'll be back to write more on it later. Tell me what you think/any criticisms so far.

EDIT: I know there are some things in there that could use some explaining; I'll make sure to get to it when I've returned, no worries!


Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by The Mad Hatter
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@LordVoldemort
I don't see anything wrong with him so far, other than the fact that he is, like the others were, underweight. Normal weight for a guy of his height would be around 170 pounds (77kg) so since he's "toned", I'd bump his weight up to 176lbs/80kg for realism.
Hidden 7 yrs ago Post by LordVoldemort
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@The Mad Hatter
Alright, I'll get to work on it and fix it up when I get back from the County Office.
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