Lovely job granting me a visual. Something about the way you've written most of your sheet made be play rather cinematic scenes in my head. Another example of weaving more than just a raw list into your CS. Every section has some bit of story or soul.
-Personality:
Especially like the mention of little habits in the extras, they are some of my favorite aspects of making characters: The granular.
-Skills:
Very fitting for his entire background and persona.
-Battle Profile:
I enjoy the reliance on environmental factors that change your abilities. It will keep things interesting. Also good to have someone leaning more to the sensible side in our party.
-Magic Profile:
You obviously knew what you wanted Francis to do. His kit is comprehensive and again: Made me play animations in my head, of him switching the enchantments on the fly.
-Tale:
You leave a lot of room for growth, which is the only point of a story. I look forward to his development in game.
-Misc/General:
Again I am left with little to say; you've obviously polished the CS and your grammar is correct. A lovely sheet for a lovely character.
@AngelofOctober Aight buddy you gave me one massive CS to read. But here's my review.
Ok so this CS is great and oh so very long, as to be expected of ya boi. And overall it was just grand. Having a colab in the there was also a great touch.
BUT! I found one major problem. And it in his magic section, Idris has two medium spells. Now that being said he doesn't have a special attack so it would make sense for him to have the second spell, even if he is half elf. But the thing is, he kinda dose have an ability. The misc battle section outlines how he can sense magic and when it's going to be cast and what not, now I know that isn't an attack per say. But I remember at some point it was brought up that something like that could be considered a special ability.
Aside from that though the CS is fantastic. Seeing his family is also pretty awesome.
Simon's cs looks great, though I have to Agree with Akaya about the verbiage making things a little confusing. Also I can't wait to find out what kind of nasty ass monster attacked Simon, that thing should be fun if we manage to find it. His magic/tech mix is also really cool, having a magic ricochet thing is actually super badass. Can't wait to see the moth boy in action.
Also if Francis makes a sword all glowy and bright. Would Simon be attracted to it?
Aight I like you're character. though like I said with Akaya's character, bottling up these emotions is only going to end poorly. I'm looking forward to it. Also can't wait to see him flip his shit at someone, that'll be a treat.
Though I have some stuff to say about the spells, I like them all don't get me wrong. But maybe the blade Sharpening one and the illumination one should switch places. Sharpening enchantment being moved to the medium section and light enchantment to the lesser section.
Aside from that I love him. Though we seem to have a lot of kids running away from things, hopefully that running can be put to good use in the forest.
Francis Edmund Breaux - His name sounds a bit french inspired. :)
I do like the picture you picked out for him. Yay, a fellow human! Since we lost a human and he's two years older than Rhaya.
Description:
That's a great description for someone with a french sounding first and last name. I enjoyed how it went through somethings alike his noble aura, his eyes, his clothing, his style of training (fencer), and his voice. Pretty great so far. I need to dig deeper to see the whole thing.
Persona:
I am now on his persona, which includes, his strengths, flaws, hobbies, and skills. Let's see if these incite excitement in my typing or whatever I come up with. Reading is such fun, should really do more of it. xD
Strengths - His strengths are completely nice and well passive, see what I did there? It makes me as if I knew him from the beginning. At least let's see what his flaws are next.
Flaws - Aww, that's sad, he's a perfectionist, shut off his emotions and gets really angry if provoked. At least, the orphans don't know how to push his buttons. Now its onto his hobbies, which will see more into what he likes.
Neutral - I like his hobbies, and that he's happy with the orphans, it's very nice really to have someone who only likes to read or play with instruments but mostly be by himself. Now its onto the last part of Francis' persona, which are the skills that Francis is great at.
Skills -
The skills above this small error, are great and I do like their descriptions. I have found a small error, in one of his skills.
He cna play them rather well.
Where did the can go, down the street to play with the CNA? xD
Other than that Instrumentalist is great.
I do like his Enchantment Aura Reading skill, it's very interesting, and ties pretty into his magic style pretty nicely.
Aww, I do like his crafting skill, it's quite great. Mostly because of his giving gifts, with his woodcarvings. :)
I do like his last skill too.
Battle Profile:
The Battle Profile has arrived, into my sights and time to review the interesting side of his things.
Focal Crystal - First thing, I got to say, I like the picture you picked for the Crystal Obelisk. And the description of the focal crystal is pretty nice too.
Special Equipment -
The Silver Pendant, has a simple and eloquent description. The description of its ability is great, I do like there has to be verbal confirmation from the person being affected by it.
The Enchanted Cloak, I like the description of the cloak itself. It is definitely for a nobleman or woman to wear. I like the descriptive ability it holds and its very nice, in the protection, though it cannot really take that many blows.
Equipment - I like all the equipment he has on him especially the 'F' etched on the Wooden Token, with another and a 'C' on it as well. I have a hint of what that is, his first name with Gertude's last name on it.
Weapons - Slash, Slash, Slash, how many slash and stabbing noises can I make? Because there's two sword based weapons in here, one is his pride and joy from his family days. The other is a lucky charm, which is a knife. Kinda feel like I want to make "Now, this is a knife! Reference." Oh wait, just did that.
Magic Profile:
Spellbook - I love the picture for the spell book and its description is pretty nifty since it can change shape. xD
School of Focus - Enchantments, I can give you many things for your troubles. Enchantments are pretty nifty if you think about it. Ala, I like the school you've picked for your character.
Spells: Lesser Spells -
I love the first part of your all your character's enchantments ala, what he says to activate the enchantment. In terms of your lesser spells.
The Fire Enchantment - I liked its description of what it does to specifically make a blade to catch fire to strike at foes.
The Sharpening Enchantment - I loved the ending part of the description of what it says, don't show off you dolt! Or you might lose an arm. That was quite funny nonetheless and its very good to know how long it lasts for too.
The Durability Enchantment - This is very nice description of the enchantment, it showed a bit of the history behind it as well it showed how it was refined so it would stop hurting the original user of said spell. This entire enchantment is very well done.
Medium Spells -
I love the first part of your all your character's enchantments ala, what he says to activate the enchantment. In terms of your medium spells.
The Torch Enchantment - First and foremost, can I fax you a letter? Called Lumen Fax, it's pretty bright to say the least. Great, description again, I like how it can be reapplied before it completely fades. Nifty, trick.
The Bonding Enchantment -
When the enchanter has bonded enough with an object, they can perform this enchatnment on it.
Misspelled Enchantment in this sentence. I notice these things pretty easily. Other than that misspelling, the spell's description is pretty nice and making the weapon or anything appear in the hand if they are at least in a four meter radius around said object.
Misc Battle Info - I do like he uses his enchantments fully to his abilities, and he can give his enchantments to others as a form of support.
Your Tale:
Arrival - Aww, that was a sad depressing story. The curse finally showed up and everyone of his family died, that was pretty daunting. I have to say curses are such sweet sorrow but I hope he gets through to find who cursed him and kick her ass. xD
Theme Song - I like the description before you click it to listen to the song you've picked for your character. I like the theme song of how much I listened to it. Good job in picking "No One is Alone."
Misc - The Royal Family is awaiting for someone to return, seems odd. But I guess its better than nothing. They want the family that was about the crops, to be apart of them again. The Galaxy Villa sounds like a nice place to live. Even though the Breaux's family only now has a mansion to their name, but that's about it.
Opossums are a fairly common species, but they aren’t often seen, as they are nomadic and largely nocturnal (with excellent night vision, naturally). Families of opossums travel between towns, foraging for food along the way, the mother carrying her kids (called joeys) on her back once they get too big to ride in her pouch. It’s not uncommon to see older joeys holding each other’s tails in a line to stay together. Speaking of, opossums’ tails are prehensile and strong enough to be used as a fifth limb useful for climbing trees and carrying things.
Opossums are often stereotyped as cowards, as they prefer to keep to themselves and stay out of trouble. This isn’t helped by their tendency to pass out, or “play dead,” when overly threatened. It’s not intentional, though; it’s an involuntary reflex. While they aren’t particularly strong in offense or defense, they’re built to survive. They have a very strong immune system protecting them from most diseases and poisons, and can eat almost anything, including carrion and bones if necessary.
Description: Maybell looks pretty typical for an opossum, except for her rather small size, even compared to others of her kind. She stands roughly two feet tall, and most of her body mass is made up of fluffy fur. She wears an orange bandana around her neck.
Strengths: Maybell’s best feature is her intelligence. She reads just about every book she can find and thus stores an encyclopedia of fun facts and trivia tidbits in her head. She can figure out riddles and puzzles with ease, and does so quite often (just, you know, for fun). In addition, Maybell has plenty of energy and determination that she pours into whatever she does. If you give her a puzzle interesting enough, she won’t let anything distract her until it’s been solved.
Flaws: While Maybell is book-smart, she doesn’t have a whole lot of sense. She’s not great at navigating social situations, and she has a terrible habit of ignoring signs of danger and running headlong into trouble she has no way of getting herself out of. Her determination isn’t always a good thing either; she often gets tunnel vision and ignores even her own needs in favor of figuring out some puzzle.
Neutral: Maybell loves mysteries. Secrets, codes, conspiracies, if it’s hidden in some way, she’s going to find it. She also has an affinity for… things, for lack of a better term. She collects little trinkets such as shiny rocks, cool bugs, and discarded buttons. Whatever strikes her fancy, really.
Skills: Sleight of Hand She has very light hands, good for filching and pickpocketing. Hiding She can fit into small spaces and camouflage herself in wooded areas. Cryptography She can recognize and decode most known ciphers given enough time and effort.
Focal Crystal: Maybell’s Focal Crystal is pale pink, roughly three inches long, and pointed at the top. When in use, its edges glow bright white. She keeps it in her pouch along with the rest of her equipment.
Special Equipment: Reihenschieber Anything written by this pen turns into illegible symbols before the ink dries. Only those marked by the Aryabhata spell can read it.
Obtentus While Maybell wears this necklace, she will take on the appearance of an average fox until either she takes it off, or an hour passes. Afterwards, the necklace won’t work again until the next day.
Equipment:
A foldable journal where Maybell writes down various codes, ciphers, and keys (all written with Reihenschieber and illegible to anyone else). A leather pouch full of little trinkets and pretty rocks. A set of lockpicks. An inkwell. Her mother’s bandana.
Weapon: She carries a small knife in a leather sheath. It’s not anything special, but it works for self-defense and practical use.
Special Attack: Playing dead is an opossum’s last line of defense in dire situations. As a reflex, they fall unconscious and release a pheromone that fools predators into thinking they’re dead. Her tendency to play dead causes Maybell a whole lot of embarrassment, but it’s a useful defense mechanism.
Magic Lv: 5
Spellbook: Maybell’s spellbook is a leatherbound book with etched patterns and copper pieces attached to the cover.
School of Focus: Trickery - In her magic, Maybell focuses on illusion, thievery, and encoding (and decoding) messages. Messing with people, hiding stuff, etc. Basically a magic Rogue.
Spells: Aryabhata (Lesser): Anyone marked by this spell can read text written with Reihenschieber. Heresco (Lesser): This spell allows Maybell to walk on walls and ceilings for up to five minutes. Murmur (Lesser): This spell lets Maybell send a short whispered message audible only to its target. Perplicatus (Medium): For five minutes, the target of this spell becomes confused and disoriented.
Misc Battle Info: Maybell isn’t the type to rush into battle. She’s not great at fighting, so she doesn’t do it often, but she will if there’s no other choice.
“A thimble’s worth of milky moon Can touch hearts larger than a thimble”
Once upon a time, there was a family of possums; a mother, a father, and nine joeys. Their lives were an adventure; they would travel from town to town scavenging for food and doing odd jobs for whoever needed help. The youngest joey, Maybell, was precocious and curious; she loved exploring and discovering new things. She had a habit of running off and getting herself lost whenever she saw something interesting.
"And all day long we talked about mercy Lead me to water, Lord, I sure am thirsty"
Maybell had heard stories of wild monsters that lived in the forests between towns, but she had never experienced them herself, having spent her first few years in civilization. When the time came to leave, Maybell had no idea how dangerous the forests could be.
“And Danger! Danger! Drawing near them was a white coat And Danger! Danger! drawing near them was a broad boat”
A few days into their journey, they stopped to rest, and Maybell wandered away from her family to explore. She noticed something unusual. It looked like some kind of plant she had never seen before, moving in a strange way that couldn’t have been caused by the wind. Curiously, Maybell approached it. Before she could get much closer, she heard her siblings calling for her.
“Maybell! Where are you? We’re going to have dinner!”
“Over here! Check out this thing I found!”
Before she could say anything else, Maybell heard a growling noise and the “plant” stood up on clawed feet and lunged at her. She could hear her siblings coming towards her and calling her name. She tried to go towards them, but got disoriented and ended up in a river.
“Why’ve you gone away? Seven suns, seven suns away”
Maybell woke up drenched on the riverbed in the middle of the night, all alone. She didn’t find her family’s campsite until the early morning, but it was destroyed and abandoned. All that was left was her mother’s bandana. She figured they must have run away from the monster. Maybell picked up the bandana and what little supplies were left at the campsite and set off to find her family.
(She would tell you that she left immediately, but she actually spent almost an entire day crying first)
Her natural survival abilities helped her live on her own until she reached Cosmos City. By the time she got there, she was dirty, tired, and hungry and was torn between continuing on and just giving up.
One morning, she woke up in her makeshift bed on the side of a road and was approached by a kindly old woman offering her a place to stay.
This is where our story begins…
“Hundred raging waters snare the lonely sigh Hold your breath and clasp at Cassiopeia”
I like the fact she's a talking Opossum, that's pretty nifty/nice. And love the picture that you picked for her. :3
Persona:
Out of all the persona parts, I like them all. I definitely like the fact she's into mysteries, she could be the next biggest conspiracy theorist. In terms of the National Treasure movies. I had to reference that movie sorries, if you don't like it. xD
I hope she doesn't steal any of orphan's things. xD
Battle Profile:
Omgs, the cutest focus crystal ever! I love her 'Reihenschieber' and necklace that turns her into a fox. The equipment is very detailed too in terms of all the pictures you've picked for her equipment.
I like that she carries a simple dagger, very nice.
The Special Attack, definitely fits the species she is. It's very cute. xD
Magic Profile:
Hehe, that's a cute spellbook for an opossum. Pretty messy indeed as the hider says. xD
Hm, that's pretty cool School of Focus, a illusion, thief and encoding / decoding messages. It's literally a thief's best friend.
I like the short and sweet spells, they make sense, since the first one allows a person to read, what her quill pen wrote, spider opossum (reference if you can't catch it), and dazing someone is pretty nice too. xD
I like her misc battle info, absolutely necessary or the last thing she will fight. Better than being completely terrified of things at least.
The Tale Section
I love the family tree picture, its very cute. I love the "A thimble worth of milky moon Can touch hearts larger than a thimble," that's very cute. I love that.
That entire tale feels like, a Disney Once upon a time, type story line, which is very cute and aww sadness too. It was pretty sad.
I can see you picked a lot of theme songs for your character, that's always nice. I'll probably have to listen to them later on.
So far, I am definitely enjoyin' all these profiles, and now you can review mine since its below this thing. If you need directions than follow with your hearts and see what I have done. I can't wait until @AngelofOctober's finish his latest profile since it is amazing so far. And it's very intense, how differently it is. I do like the orange in the very beginning. You definitely have a lot of passion in your writing sir and I hope you continue with that said passion.
Age: 14
Species: Human
Description: Rhaya’s body been through a rigorous training regime with a slight edge on keeping her in shape and building her muscle mass. Because of this she weighs 116 pounds and is only 5’2” feet tall for her age. On her body she got some bruises from the training with wooden swords all day and night during her sparring matches. She has a single sword slash scar on her back, from a ironblade weapon that her sparring partner Beatrix S. Tver used against the top rule of the academy. Her eyes glow slightly brighter when she’s wielding her sword or using wind magic.
She wears a emerald pendant necklace, which has only herself and her mother Darcy L. Claire within it. She has a birthmark on her left shoulder that is a star, which is the same as Darcy’s birthmark. She radiates an aura showing she’s been trained really hard in a very well known establishment of the greatest warrior women known to man. It is a confident aura mostly, that she’s at least skilled in wielding a weapon she was taught specifically by Darcy and Ashley since she had a unnatural talent to wield a Katana.
Her clothing style is similar to noble caste people, since her family’s name brings much weight to the bargaining table. Her family worked hard to become a noble, she will work as hard to continue that as well. The clothes she wears is similar to her military outfit in terms of colors and trim but that’s mostly it. She has a bracelet on her wrist that signifies the training at the Drake’s Female Academy with a black dragon image on the bracelet itself and emeralds for the black dragon’s eyes.
Strengths:
”Many things in this world have a counterbalance. I was taught this in the Drake’s Female Academy and by Headmistress Darcy.”
She had always been an optimist at heart and it usually gives her the self-made focus to keep herself going when it feels hopeless. It did help that the Drake’s Female Academy made that self-made focus into something greater. The training taught her to be very diligent of everyone’s feelings, their reasons for coming there, and their aspirations. This is usually called her high sensitivity to the environment and people around her, if they are happy, she’s happy, if they are depressed and down in the dumps she is too. This made her the most liked student of the Drake’s Female Academy for that specific reason.
She hardly ever complained during any of her studies or training sessions in the Drake’s Female Academy, mostly because she is a hard worker. She had always been a dreamer somewhat and usually would talk about the future to many people. She got noticed mostly because of her dreams and future talk to everyone in the Drake’s Female Academy. She had always put on a smile when she would be bruised or injured by someone’s accurate hits on her. It showed her to be ironwilled individual.
She insightful in certain people’s form, while sparring, she can easily execute some beautiful moves to exploit their weaknesses. Her showing off is mostly like a dance or fun to her, since its the only thing she finds fun in the Drake’s Female Academy. The playful nature in her insightful attacks or how she just dances with her blade wooden or not is awe inspiring, to others wanting to copy her but failing at it.
She always had a friendly outlook on everyone, even those people who are quite hostile to her, in terms of her rivals. This gives everyone a slight bit pause, when they see her because they know she can be brutal in sparring if you underestimate her. It gives everyone including her rivals a slight hint of not taking this girl lightly. She gives people many chances even though the Drake’s Female Academy is very strict in that regard.
Flaws:
Her friendly nature of always wanting to be friends with anyone usually rubs people the wrong way in the Drake’s Female Academy. It usually causes people who outright hate her to call for a sparring match. They would usually straight out punch her in the face for being herself. She takes awhile to figure out what’s wrong when it’s too late to apologize and usually keeps some of her pent up aggravation bottled up. She can’t really figure out the real reason anyone would hate her guts. It usually takes until someone bluntly says it to her face, she’s the youngest person within the Drake’s Female Academy, who’s has an innate and natural talent for swordplay. The jealousy in her rivals tone is clear as day.
Her most bottled up emotion is sadness, she has never cried or done anything to show that she’s a girl and need to do girl things. She gets laughed at sometimes for the fact she’s so unlike everyone else. She doesn’t speak her mind to anyone not even the teachers, because she sees everyone that needs respect and no questions. This usually causes her to get somewhat bad grades in being assertive and dominate during Battlefield training, aka a leadership role alike her mother had.
The thing that frustrates her the most, which usually causes people to be frustrated with her, is her out right great mind. She tries to use it for simple things, but it always tries to think two steps ahead of anyone, when they are in a sparring match or even during the Battlefield training. Her tactician mind frustrates everyone around her including her mother, since tacticians should be leaders but she doesn’t want to lead. She doesn’t really do great with awe inspiring speeches, and usually stumbles on her words and constantly say, sorry I can’t do this anymore and runs off with a quite shocking speed to her room in the Academy. She punishes herself a lot and wants to change her shyness to public speaking but constantly stuck in the same loop of not being able to do anything about it.
She had a big problem in knowing someone’s feelings towards her, besides their hate and vitriol. She has always been thick headed when it came to people who love her in more than just anything. Which is probably why she gained her biggest rival in the Drake’s Female Academy, by the name of Beatrix S. Tver. She couldn’t mentally understand her affection towards her, it didn’t really click in her head. It took her to figure it out right after, Beatrix cheated to harm her in the most brutal way possible. She figured out that Beatrix was a scorn by her neglect and she has been trying to fix this part of her lack of knowledge of affection for awhile.
Neutral:
One of her hobbies, is looking up at the stars. She enjoys doing this so much she constantly does it alone or with someone she cares about. Her mother usually watches the star with her, when she was at the Drake’s Female Academy. There’s only one other person she shared this moment with, and that was her greatest rival, Beatrix S. Tver. She only saw a friend within Beatrix and nothing more until she figured that out after awhile.
The other of her hobbies, is playing some form of dragon vs human chess. She’s a master of this chess board, since she usually only ever plays dragons, because they are the white chess pieces on the board. It is one of the reasons, she usually is two steps ahead of people. She only ever loses to the adults in the Drake’s Female Academy.
She has a odd habit, which is a strange form of spin before she strikes a target or a person with a wooden sword. She kinda has a smile on her face when doing it too, because she’s having fun while doing it. It was never taught in the Drake’s Female Academy, its just how she wields a sword while attacking with it.
She outright has a passion for cute things, but she usually blushes when someone catches her looking at something really cute. It could be a beautiful flower, or a cute animal. It is tied in her quirk because of the blushing part, she constantly blushes mostly. She is highly embarrassed of the fact she does this at all.
She has another hobby, and it is classified as reading she enjoys reading the books she got from the Drake’s Female Academy. She read most of the books in that Academy but she always goes back to the Rules of Engagement and her mother’s bedtime story all the time. Those two books she enjoys keeping with her at all times. These two books are an anchor when she needs to fall asleep or remember some of the curriculum of the Drake’s Female Academy.
Skills:
Lookout
Her eyes are very sharp since her time training at the Drake’s Female Academy. And usually use for lookout to keep people safe while they are traveling on the road or at camp. She can usually take her lookout shift seriously enough and hardly ever got bad grades on this. Out of everything, it’s pretty much essential to have someone who got a great eye to see something out of the ordinary.
Conversation
Her conversational skills is pretty exceptional for her age, compared to older girls in the Drake’s Female Academy. It’s a natural talent for her mostly, she can hold conversations about anything that’s on her mind that interests her including the cute things. Even though that involves her being embarrassed at the thought of the entire conversation. She can talk about anything that interests the group or otherwise. Her noble charms usually comes through within the conversation, since it’s very hard to hide the fact she’s a noble that went to a very prestigious female academy.
Running
She’s great at running in large sprints to keep in front of people on a large march through anything. Her running style kinda is definitely the same as her mother’s since her mother and her usually run all the time outside of the Drake’s Female Academy. Not many girls her age or older could keep up with her at the Drake’s Female Academy since it is a very rigorous training regimen and grueling marches around the landscape of Drake’s Female Academy.
Horse Riding
She can ride a horse pretty effectively even though it took a lot of practice to stop falling off of one. She usually enjoys running or walking but if there’s a horse nearby she’ll be pretty easily to get on it and help anyone who needs a lift and ride them around. She hasn’t really been able to find anyone who really likes this skill of hers because she rides a bit slower than most great message carriers. Mostly because she doesn’t want anyone to be knocked off the horse for her going to fast.
Focal Crystal: The Emerald Eye - It’s color is emerald green and it is located on the White Clairist Katana. She calls it the emerald eye for sentimental value mostly because it is attached to her family’s heirloom weapon. Her mother called it something different but it had a similar name throughout the generations of the Claire Family as a whole.
Special Equipment: White Clairist Katana *In her appearance tab
The White Clairist Katana has been in the Claire family for generations. The only person able to masterfully use this katana is Rhaya’s mother by the name of Darcy L. Claire. Rhaya was given the chance to do the same as her mother and master and follow the creed of the Claire family. “Never back down from a fight even if you are outnumbered and constantly strive to be the best you can be,” the creed of her family for generations.
Ability: White Windshield - The singular ability of the White Clairist Katana, it protects the user in a white windshield of pure wind energies that only protects Rhaya in her direct front. She must be holding the White Clairist Katana directionally in front of her, in how her mother taught her how to wield it. The White Windshield comes directly out of the Emerald Eye. When it activates the ability, it sounds like birds are singing, the singing dissipates after awhile. This ability affects Rhaya’s eye color by giving it a glow that is similar to the White Windshield effect, which is white with a outline of emerald green surrounding the white.
Aspected Professional Trainee Garb *In her appearance tab
This garb was handcrafted by the military school she went to mostly because of the high professionalism of the Claire Family’s name. This is aspected to her magical school, which she picked up at the Military school called Drake’s Female Academy. This fine establishment always takes care of their own and is leaded by Darcy L. Claire but doesn’t give anyone special treatment since she’s a strict head instructor.
Ability: Windstream Defense - This singular ability of the Aspected Professional Trainee garb. It enhances the strength of White Windshield by giving it a second layer of defense. It pulses with energy every second this one ability is active to this degree. It makes noises of grasshoppers chirping towards anyone who directly in front of Rhaya, but it doesn’t hurt anyone’s ear drums.
Equipment:
The Claire Pack - This is a large pack, with the Claire family symbol on it. It carries many things, that a Claire family member usually requires for themselves on a travel or journey. This one pack has much history since it was used much when Darcy was traveling and learning how to become the headmistress of the Drake’s Female Academy. Darcy gave this pack to her daughter to cherish everything that is coming in the future.
Sharpening Tool - She carries sharpening tool on her all the time to sharpen her weapons if they get dull so they can do their job. It was given to her by specifically her teacher in the Drake’s Female Academy by the name of Ashley R. Tver. She learned from Ashley to always take care of her weapons or she wouldn’t get a good grade when it came to maintaining them.
Books - She carries with her in her pack, two specific books. The first one is her favorite bedtime story that her mother usually tells her, it’s usually a folklore story about a beautiful woman becoming leader of a great nation. The second one is the Drake’s Female Academy’s rules of engagement and some interesting facts on monsters out in the world, but its very basic rules. It has a specific tagline, of learning about a monster is always better fighting it instead of theorycrafting it.
Weapon: Purple Emerald Katana - Rhaya got this Katana as a spare from her mother’s weapon collection. It made her eyes shine with how pretty the blade looked and it always help with emeralds. It is a spare non-magically enchanted katana. She uses it for training purposes, mostly because her mother was strict she needs to focus on set tasks every single hour or lose her sharp edge since being distracted is dangerous.
‘Rock’ the Iron Shortsword - This iron shortsword has a name inscribed on it of Rock. It was in her mother’s weapon collection for sentimental value but her mother gave it to her for one reason alone. This weapon was her father’s that she doesn’t remember since he died when she was only two years old. Her mother couldn’t stop looking at it and bringing up great memories before her husband died. She gave it to her daughter on one condition, that she brings it back after her long journey wherever that might lead.
Special Attack: N/A
Magic Lv: 5
Spellbook: The spellbook was crafted by a specialty mage within the Drake’s Female Academy, it looks more like a highly specialized rule book than a spellbook. It follows the primary colors of the academy’s attire, white, emerald green, a black dragon symbol in the middle, and gold trim. It has Rhaya’s full name on it in pretty font on the back of the Spellbook, which is colorful to fit her personality. The one who created this spellbook put her name on the front underneath the Black Dragon symbol by the name of Vashti I. Perleth, who’s a Human Mage for the Drake's Female Academy and as well the headmistress’ best friend, which is Darcy Lyn Claire.
School of Focus: Wind
Spells:
Wind Bolt
She chants her Academy’s motto, which is, I will always be prepared for anything. It will require the full scope of my focus to defeat any foe. It forms above her left shoulder in a form of a Bolt of Wind, similar to an arrow or lightning bolt. She will shoot it out towards an opponent that is attacking her with extreme prejudice and that's mostly monsters. The Wind Bolt's color is similar to the color to White Windshield, which is an ability for the White Clairist Katana.
The charge up time for this spell is around 1 minute and 15 seconds. At the maximum amount of charge it looks more like a Lightning Bolt of Wind and is pretty quick to hit the target. The less charge it forms into an arrow or bolt from an Archer's longbow or Crossbow, it's usually less powerful as a bolt or an arrow.
Cold Wind
She chants her Academy’s motto, which is, I will always be prepared for anything. It will require the full scope of my focus to defeat any foe. The cold wind spell is very visible when she uses the spell, compared to mother nature's cold winds, that usually get much colder in temperature. It is colored to seem unnatural, mostly because you will see whitish green wind coming towards you. It helps people who are dead tired of the heat or trained too hard and is completely exhausted.
The charge up time for this spell is around 2 minutes and 15 seconds. At the maximum amount of charge gives out a proper Cold Wind worth of 40 degrees in temperature. Any less than maximum amount of charge, gives around 50 degrees in temperature, in terms it transforms from a Cold Wind into a Cool Breeze.
Spherical Wind
She chants her Academy’s motto, which is, I will always be prepared for anything. It will require the full scope of my focus to defeat any foe. The Spherical Wind forms above her head, which has a similar color to her White Windshield ability. It moves slowly towards an opponent that is attacking her with extreme prejudice, and that's mostly monsters. When it hits a monster it gives out a burst of cool breeze type affect towards anyone that is her allies near the monster, that it hits.
The charge up time for this spell is around 1 minute and 30 seconds. The longer it has been charged the cooler the wind that bursts out from it after hitting a creature or monster. Which usually equals warmer than the Cold Winds she uses but better than the extreme heat of a desert.
Tempest’s Strike
She chants her Academy’s motto, which is, I will always be prepared for anything. It will require the full scope of my focus to defeat any foe. It is an extremely precise wind magic spell, that she was taught by her mother Darcy in the most perfect of circumstances. It forms into a Crescent Moon shaped wind type blade, that is purely made up of wind. It launches towards a target in a really fast spinning motion, similar to a buzz saw from a lumber mill. The closer it gets to the target the faster it goes.
It is called Tempest's Strike since it cuts like a saw to a tree. The color is pure solid green to show its compacted wind magic. It takes about a total of four minutes to fully charge up to be as powerful to cut at least 12 trees in a row. It appears directly above her, so it goes towards a target.
Tempest’s Barrier
She chants her Academy’s motto, which is, I will always be prepared for anything. It will require the full scope of my focus to defeat any foe. It is a extremely defensive wind magic spell, that she was taught by her mother Darcy. It forms into a large wind barrier or wall directly in front of Rhaya. It is purely solid and can only block non-magical arrows very easily, only because of its toughness. The color is pure solid green to show its compacted wind magic.
It has a charge up time, the maximum amount of time that it can be charged up to is 3 minutes and 30 seconds. The maximum charge can block around a total of fifty arrows. Half charged can only block around 25 arrows. Barely charged is for quick escapes and only blocks alike around 5 arrows at most before it dissipates. The way someone can tell it is weakening is simply it changes color to a white puffy like cloud when it is about to fully collapse and disperse.
Misc Battle Info:
Her battle style is very much similar to her mother, even though she only uses one weapon instead of dual wielding like her mother style. She uses a modified sword dancing style compared to her mother’s since she only wields one sword compared to two. When it comes to sword wielding that is. But their magic wielding style is definitely different since her mother has been around much longer than her daughter.
Darcy refined the art of wind magic to a tee but the two spells she taught her daughter are identical. The only reason why these two spells are identical is because it’s primarily because it’s the Claire Family’s specialized wind magic spells. Not many people can copy Tempest’s Strike or Tempest’s Barrier that well.
”The tempest bore witness to a child of impressive skill and innate talent. The winds are always fleeting and usually take away the measurable strength or spirit with them. The Claire Family grew stronger through conflict, schooling and the birth of the latest child within their family by the name of Rhaya.”
14 years ago on June 15th was when Rhaya was born to Darcy Lyn Claire and Derrick Lee Claire. This was a momentous occasion for the Claire Noble family of the town called Vaira Stars, which has about five noble houses. The Vaira Stars town has massive events for when one of the noble families have a child, which is called the ceremony of life. The ceremony of life has everyone living in the town to celebrate with the noble family or regular citizens that live in the town. It is a pretty exciting time to be in Vaira Stars when these births occur, since everyone is jovial and congrats the family who had a child born.
Derrick and Darcy were the only ones throughout the entire village or town that didn’t have a child born until it happened. Two of their greatest allies, who are to the Claire family are the Tver Family and the Perleth family. These three families are three of the five noble houses within the Vaira Stars Town. The only noble house that was very sparse during the celebration was the 4th and 5th Noble houses, their head wasn’t at the celebration. They were out drilling the knights and other such military that the Vaira Stars town are very proud of, while staying clear from the grand fortress academy called Drake’s Female Academy.
The women who defend the Drake’s Female Academy are terrifying when they are training the new generation of warriors. For the all female military arm called the ‘Grand Valkyrie squadron,’ which are called that for their usefulness on a horseback. Everyone within the Vaira Stars celebrates the greatness that is the Academy with a great celebration. The celebration is classified as a honoring celebration and birthday for how long it has been in service.
The Grand Fortress Academy was built 150 to 350 years ago when the Vaira Royal Family was fully competent and didn’t want to start anything with the other great cities in the world. Lately the Vaira Royal Family has been getting less and less active in the world because they are content with the noble families they have underneath them be their faces. The only greatest project they did was the building of the Grand Fortress Academy underneath King Drake L. Vaira.
He was their greatest king and to this day, his statue is in the center of the Vaira Stars Town as a symbol of education for all the women of the town. He’s remembered constantly when they talk about how the Drake’s Female Academy was built. Each celebration in this town lasts for a week. The longest celebration is the winter or summer festival, which lasts up to a month and two weeks.
Meanwhile, back at the celebration of Life, which involved Rhaya’s birth. Derrick was mingling with his friends, while his wife was relaxing after giving birth to a beautiful baby girl, while chatting with some of her best friends. The birth went really smoothly like the Tempest herself was watching over them. It’s not a god or anything but how nature can be really gentle until it turns into a raging storm. It’s the Claire’s family crest, a tornado with a sword through it to signify the wrath of the winds are the worst kind of thing to deal with.
Derrick outright hated rumors of any kind that slandered the Claire Noble Family name or the Vaira Royal Family name. Since these two families were even closer than the Parleth and Tver families are to the Claire family. The rumor was that the Queen Selina L. Vaira would invoke the wrath of the tempest and cause a calamity on the entire town and it would be wiped out. The people who were spreading those rumors were people who weren’t from the village at all, but everyone is welcome at any of their celebrations. Derrick couldn’t make a scene since Selina was there to quash the rumors with a warm hearted speech and led her people in continuing the celebration.
Derrick celebrated Queen Selina with a cheer and toast for that wonderful leadership speech even though she’s not much of a fighter, since she’s a straight up pacifist and the descendant of King Drake L. Vaira. The celebration abruptly stopped because the Claire family don’t really like week long celebrations even though it is a tradition within the town, but usually the only two families to stop a celebration are the Vaira Royal Family and the Claire Noble Family. Queen Selina talked to her ancestors staunchest of allies in their home after the celebration and told them congrats in their baby girl and hopeful she will be as good as them with swords.
The two parents were happy to hear Selina’s congratulations and hopeful they will keep their sword training going within their family. Derrick looked at Selina, with a stern look and wanted to say something.
“I must ask you an important question, what about your daughter Selina?” Derrick asked.
“She’s doing well, she continuing her studies in how to be a proper princess, even though she’s pretty much. Alike your wife most of the time of the day when she’s not training herself in getting stronger or other things,” Selina said, happily.
“Oh that’s nice Selina, anything we can do to help her out?” Derrick asked, with the look on his face.
“Oh the entry into the Drake’s Female Academy would help but she’s a bit off from that since the age to join a military-esque academy to become apart of is around 13 years old,” Selina said, with a happy smile.
Darcy looked a bit curiously towards Selina and wondered how old the daughter to the queen is, right now. “I could give her an aptitude test to see if she could get in earlier, we are always looking for new recruits to the your ancestor’s academy. If she has any innate talent and skill with a weapon that is and her elemental aptitude test too,” Darcy said, happily always wanting to give everyone a chance to get in since her ancestor was the one in charge of aptitude tests back in the day.
Selina looked surprised and forgot about the Claire family’s talent in seeing talent and innate abilities in others. “Ah yeah, my daughter Sarah Isis Vaira will be happy to meet her most favorite of the Grand Valkyrie Squadron, nicknamed Windbreaker,” Selina said, with a laugh when she said that.
Darcy looked down when she heard her nickname she gained while being a Grand Valkyrie, it took a toll on her love life for a long time. “I will be grateful to meet your daughter Selina,” Darcy said kindly to the queen of the city.
Selina got up and smiled at Darcy with her response. “I look forward to seeing my daughter happy,” Selina said happily. She waves goodbye to Darcy and Derrick and goes back to the Royal Family’s Castle called the Drake’s Grand Palace in honor of her ancestor.
Derrick looks towards his wife with a bit of a smile. “It is nice, we were able to speak to Selina in our most happy time,” Derrick said. He couldn’t help but laugh a bit at the fact he’s finally alone with his wife.
Darcy giggled at what he said, but couldn’t help but wonder how Rhaya will grow up within their noble house. After that the two parents went to bed, and made sure their baby girl was sleeping soundly.
Rhaya’s 2nd year birthday was pretty auspicious and nothing really out of the ordinary until the dreadful news. Her mother heard from one of the Claire’s personal guards, that the unthinkable happened. Darcy was utterly devastated to hear her beloved husband was killed in action. She always wondered why her husband never took his sword with him, Rock, the Iron Shortsword. He would have still been alive if he took his weapon with him.
Rhaya was too young to remember her father’s face and was always near her mother, always. She couldn’t really understand what was happening and why her mother was crying about. She has never seen her mother this devastated in her life. She tried to cheer up her mother by saying, “Mom, please don’t be sad you still have me.”
Darcy looked at Rhaya when she said those words and she awed at her daughter. “I will cherish you always, Rhaya,” Darcy said. She couldn’t help but want to find out who killed her husband but if she does that, who will take care of her daughter if she dies. Darcy sighed slightly resigning herself to being a single parent to a little girl that is going to be her focus in making her the best of the Claire Family. Darcy hugged her daughter tightly and didn’t want to let her go because she was still crying at the fact her husband is now dead.
Rhaya loved her mother with all her heart, she wanted to stay in her mother’s arms for all eternity since she felt safe with Darcy. She was a kind and gentle little girl and was happy in her mother’s arms. Darcy put her daughter down and walked her daughter to her room and tucked her into her bed.
Darcy looked at her sweet two year old daughter, who she just tucked in bed. “Please go to sleep I need to talk to the soldier who gave me the news,” Darcy said to her daughter.
Rhaya looked at her mother with a slight worry in her face, but she nodded her head and went to sleep.
Darcy walked back into the kitchen, where she learned of her husband’s death and talked to the personal guard that told her of the terrible news to tell all the other noble families and the Royal Family immediately. After that, Darcy went to her bedroom to cry herself to sleep, since she couldn’t really handle herself in public, at least her leave of absence was known by all of the academy students within Drake’s Female Academy.
Darcy saw something within her child Rhaya, and she was only seven years old at the time. She outright asked, “Rhaya dear do you want to go to, Drake’s Female Academy?” She wanted to see if her intuition was right about her daughter, that she was unbelievably talented and to especially see, if she can use wind magic too.
Rhaya confusedly asked since she was only seven years old at the time, “What is the Drake’s Female Academy?” She didn’t really know it was the prestigious Fortress Academy for any female that wants to try their luck at being apart of the Grand Valkyrie Squadron.
Darcy smiled kindly at her daughter and breathed in and out for a second and looked directly into her eyes. “I’m the headmistress there, Rhaya. The Drake’s Female Academy is were girls like you learn how to defend yourself from the wilderness and join the lustrous Grand Valkyrie Squadron,” Darcy said, happily.
Rhaya heard what her mother said and smiled at what her mother said. “I will go with you mother. To see what it is about,” Rhaya said, happily not wanting to disappoint her mother.
Darcy had a smile come across her face when she heard her daughter say those words, it filled her with joy. “Oh okay, let’s go, I will take you there myself by horseback,” Darcy said. She took her daughter’s hand and walked her outside of the home to the stables and helped her up on the horse. She looked at her daughter, who was holding on to the horse. “Are you okay dear?” Darcy asked.
Rhaya looked to her mother who asked that question and smiled kindly. “Mom, I am okay as long as I am with you,” Rhaya said, showing her affection for her mother much. Even though, the horse in question was very calm with Rhaya on it.
Darcy got onto the horse, in front of her daughter and looked down at her. “Hold onto me, it’ll be a pretty long ride to Drake’s Female Academy,” Darcy said, calmly. Rhaya does what she is told and holds onto her mother tightly. Darcy starts moving the horse to get going as fast as possible towards the Drake’s Female Academy.
Darcy and her daughter arrived at the Drake’s Female Academy around mid-afternoon, while the academy students were doing drills and eating, while taking a small break from drills. She always goes to her best friend, Vashti to help her most of the time on important tasks like this specific one anyway. Darcy took her daughter to Vashti quickly, since she hasn’t really seen her in awhile but she was busy.
“Vashti are you there?” Darcy asked, with a slight rushed tone in her voice.
Vashti was reading a book and heard Darcy’s question and smiled towards her and noticed Rhaya in Darcy’s arms. “Aww, you brought your daughter, is there a reason for this?” Vashti asked curiously.
Rhaya looked at her mother and then at Vashti with a smile. “Mommy says I have some innate talent,” Rhaya said, with a smile. She didn’t really understand what’s going on but she loves her mother a lot.
Vashti smiled at the child and looked towards Darcy with a bit of a crazy look, since she could see the talent flowing through her alike a small river flowing through her of wind magic and some other forms innate talent. “Yeah, your daughter is definitely alike you Darcy it seems like you raised her correctly. Would probably be a good idea to initiate her into the Academy,” Vashti said happily.
Darcy smiled happily and looked to her daughter. “You want to join the Academy with your mother as headmistress?” Darcy asked her daughter.
Rhaya looked at her mother with a smile on her face. “As long, you are here I will be here,” Rhaya said, happily.
It happened just like, the Claire Family’s had the rank of headmistress and the youngest child, within the Academy. However, her mother didn’t know of her daughter’s problems as of yet, and would have to deal with them as time went on, but that is as much as what will happen in this story as of now.
She decided on her own to leave her hometown of Vaira Stars to become something greater and she left when she was 13 years old. She had a small contingent of soldiers traveling with her to Cosmos City. These soldiers were loyal to the Claire Family and wanted to protect the daughter of Darcy and the Late Derrick, who died when his daughter was only two years old. The journey was on horseback, with these soldiers since it would probably taken longer on foot to reach Cosmos City.
Six of the eight soldiers were from the Claire Family guard, while the other two on either side of Rhaya, were Elite Royal Guard from the King’s personal regiment of guards. The King didn’t want anything bad to happen to Rhaya Lyn Claire since she’s not old enough to carry a child yet. And the future of Claire Family is at stake if Rhaya dies before reaching Cosmos City. The closest allies to the Vaira Royal Family requires to continue their family tree, which is considered the Claire Noble Family.
Being a high noble of the Vaira Stars Kingdom gives her much lead way, since the sway of the Claire Family hasn’t ever been waning. She wanted to learn more about the world in the most simplest way possible by leaving her hometown. She learned of the House Clementine, which is in the Great City of Cosmos City from Vashti Isis Perleth. Vashti’s younger brother Steven went to Cosmos City to learn about how to properly protect his hometown via disappearing for five years until returning to cast a barrier spell. And that’s most of the Barrier users were taught by this house for generations, which lives in Cosmos City.
She wanted to learn how to use barriers herself, even though she is very naturally attuned to her family’s wind magic. She couldn’t help to meet new people and hopeful she could get behind a noble cause or two while she’s in Cosmos City, to help out the Vaira Stars Kingdom and any other cities. She couldn’t help if she was missing something or anything important.
Arrival:
Rhaya’s arrival to Cosmos City had only a few bumps along the way. The biggest one was running into a bandit group, that tried to stop Rhaya and the eight personal guards that were assigned to her traveling to the city. The bandits in question were outnumbered but they had an advantage, they knew the area very well. The leader of the bandits was a slightly older than Rhaya in age, and the same gender as her. Her fiery spirit was pretty much able to stop the highly trained and skilled Vaira Stars noblemen and child in their tracks.
“Oh lookie here, the elitists who destroyed the Fallen Stars Bandits, about 350 years ago,” She said, with a slight hatred of anyone being apart of the Vaira Stars Kingdom.
One of the Soldiers, eyed her and she has a shocking resemblance to Queen Selina & Princess Sarah. “You look eerily like our queen and royal princess,” He said, with a determined look in his face.
“Wait, my ancestor’s line still lives?” She said, with a slight realization, that her ancestor’s line wasn’t destroyed alike so many others within the Fallen Stars Bandits. She couldn’t really believe it, the Fallen name is still alive and well and started to cry. “Please, can me and my band of bandits follow you we will help you get to whatever destination is,” She said, with a defeated tone in her voice.
The soldier in question, stopped his wanting to kill her, and didn’t know that Stella R. Fallen had a sister, and they stayed bandits this whole time. “Rhaya, what says you? Will you allow Stella R. Fallen’s descendant to follow us,” He said, trying to get Rhaya’s attention.
Rhaya was staring at the girl in question, when she heard the personal guard of hers voice. “She can come, but on one single condition. What’s your name?” Rhaya asked the redheaded girl in question.
The redheaded girl looked directly towards Rhaya with the same fiery passion. “Just my name? My name is Sasha Edna Fallen, with the last remnants of what you could say, was the reinforcements of the Fallen Star Bandits but arrived after the bloodbath that occurred all those years ago,” Sasha said, with resolve in her voice. She looked her fellow bandits, and they put away their weapons since she didn’t want any more blood to be spilled because of bad blood between anyone who was a member of the Fallen Stars Bandits and Vaira Stars. She put away her two daggers back into their seethe since they were in her hands, they were put back really quickly.
The Soldier that talked noticed the bandits were seething their weapons and couldn’t help smile, since they never knew the Fallen Stars Bandits had two forces in question. “Oh okay, if you have horses, we will allow you to travel with us, since we are going to Cosmos City. I guess since you don’t go near the Great Cities you aren’t very well known bandits, since there’s only a total of 5 of you,” He said, with a booming voice.
Sasha annoyingly sighed hearing they are going to Cosmos City for one, and for two that the soldier talking is very bossy, though she did like how Rhaya looks, she couldn’t help but smile. “You sir are very bossy, but we do have horses, and we aren’t even on the radar of Cosmos City. Mostly since your Great King Drake, annihilated the Fallen Stars Bandits in those bandit wars all those years ago. So yeah, back in the day, I think any Great City would sound the alarm if we came close to them, but not so much now,” Sasha said, while blushing while staring at Rhaya.
The Soldier, noticed Sasha blushing while she’s staring at Rhaya. “Rhaya, looks like you’ve gained another admirer, be more alert this time around so the same thing doesn’t happen to you again,” He said, in the same bossy tone with a big bellowing laugh.
Rhaya looked at her noble family’s personal guard and friend of the family. She looked directly towards Sasha and it was directly on her face plain as day, Rhaya started to blush a bit mostly because she is trying to be a bit more alert but enjoys the attention from people. “U-Uhh, thanks for the warning soldier. I am grateful to you for helping me reach my destination, Sasha,” Rhaya said, with her looking down at her horse because she’s somewhat embarrassed.
Sasha listened to every word that Rhaya and the bossy soldier was talking about and couldn’t really put her finger on it. “You are kinda losing me but I guess that’s what nobles have that I don’t the know how of what’s going on in your hometown, since I am just a bandit. Who roughs it out in the wilderness,” Sasha said, with a confused look on her face.
The soldiers just laugh at Sasha’s ignorance and start moving ahead of them, with Rhaya still in the middle. Rhaya looks carefully at Sasha and waves at her while they move past her. “You better hurry Sasha, or these soldiers will leave you behind,” Rhaya said, with a smile on her face.
Sasha looked at the other four and they walked towards a nearby tree, that had one white mare, which was Sasha’s, and four black horses. She got on her horse and rode in front of the soldiers. “I know a shorter route to Cosmos City, it’ll cut down on your travels by a bit, don’t know how much time will be saved,” Sasha said with a renewed determination in her voice. Because she knows this area like the back of her hand since she travels to the great cities much, because of her family’s need of supplies.
One of the Soldiers look at Sasha with an annoyed look on his face. “If it is shorter than the route we will be taking, so be it,” He said, with an annoyed tone in his voice.
Rhaya looked down trying not to intervene since she still has problems with public speaking. Even when there’s soldiers around, and someone else joining in that’s much more confident in public speaking. She got frustrated and looked a bit angry. “Can we just go, without all the bickering by the way?” Rhaya asked, with a slight angry tone of voice but she’s still a child so she didn’t want to curse.
The Soldiers heard the angry tone in the girl and stopped chatting since they constantly push her buttons pretty easily as it is. It’s very good to figure out what she isn’t good at, she is an open book to anyone that looks at her. An emotional wreck in some people’s eyes that don’t really know her that well, but getting to know her is pretty enduring of a trait after all.
Rhaya’s group was traveling at a faster pace than they could’ve done, with the help of Sasha that is. It cut down their so called year journey down a bit, and Rhaya arrived in Cosmos City around 7 months into their journey from their supposed. She could see the barrier, that she more or less took for granted in her hometown, and there was different colors present here than her hometown as well.
She was escorted with the 8 guards all the way to House Clementine. The lead guard speaks in a firm tone, “Rhaya we are here at the destination you seek, the House Clementine, we saw from some people in this town don’t really like this house you sought for. We didn’t really asked why, because the eight of us kinda look dangerous to say the least and have a different way of life to these people in the Great City. We should return to Vaira Stars Kingdom to report on our journey to your mother and the King, that our task is done.” He turns around slowly, and is happy that their journey is done sooner than expected at least.
Rhaya looked at the guard who was walking away, she didn’t really know what to say, to the people inside but she decided to walk, into the home and was greeted by a elderly woman, that entered the room. “I have to ask, are you the matron of this house?” Rhaya asked, kindly towards the elderly woman in question.
Gertrude gently smiled at the young girl, who looked around 14 years old. “Yes, my name is Gertrude, what’s yours?” Gertrude asked kindly.
Rhaya smiled at finally meeting Gertrude for the first time, since she heard wonderful things about her from Vashti, that told the story of her younger brother. “My name is Rhaya Lyn Claire, a noble of Vaira Stars,” Rhaya said, with a smile.
Gertrude wondered why this child was here. “Why are you here child?” Gertrude asked with a smile.
Rhaya just couldn’t help but smile at that question. “I want to see the world more than living in my hometown. And I came to learn and meet new people, since I know everyone of Vaira Stars. I am pretty naive of the world around me and I want to help in anyway I can,” Rhaya said, proudly.
Gertrude smiled at the child’s answer to her question. “You can stay here as long as you want or need to since you are probably tired on your journey,” Gertrude said.
Rhaya smiled kindly to Gertrude and sat down her pack finally after a long travel time, that had very little breaks in between of traveling from Vaira Stars to Cosmos City. She stretched and she definitely enjoyed seeing new things, while her home in Vaira Stars will always be her home. She walked over to one of the chairs and sat down and fell asleep. She was a lot more tired than she should’ve been.
Gertrude gently placed a blanket on Rhaya to make sure she’s comfortable. She put Rhaya’s things near her, just to hope she wakes up a bit more well rested, and she walked back to her room to rest.
Rhaya was sitting at the table, when all the kids who were orphans walked up to her and told her about their plan to save Gertrude to retrieve the golden set. She looked at them with a bit of awe and wanted to help them since these five long months being with them made her want to help in anyway possible. “I will help Granny Gertrude, she is like a second motherly figure to me,” Rhaya said, kindly and a gentle smile.
Theme Song:
Battle Music:
Misc:
Her mother is the prettiest and scariest person you would ever come across, even her style is unique in the way she fights. Rhaya carries a small photo of how her mother looks like for some odd reason in her pack. Rhaya loves her mother even though they usually gets into fights with each other mostly because of her lack of wanting to become a leader. She wants to do other things besides leading the Grand Valkyrie Squadron.
If I could pick a word for this character, it would be adorable. That being said, this was the one thing that stood out to me.
- You actually can/should have one more lesser spell or medium spell.
Overall
I love how cute she is and that she is into mysteries and codes. I love that you chose to draw your own pic for her. I love that her special ability is something that is natural for her species in a way that she can be embarrassed by it sometimes which makes it feel more natural. I think it was a neat idea to provide pics for the equipment instead of only describing it.
I love the way the Tale was told, poor Maybell, but the underline on the first of every first word maybe me wish it had been a word or code. Like it would spell out ‘Opossum’ or something lol. This character is just great and I love that she is different from some of the others in the group by being an animal species.
I don’t really see anything that pops out as being wrong. I really love that we have a more solider type to the mix. I mean, yes, she is a noble but it feels different in a way from say Francis which is good. I love the relationship and affection that comes through in the writing for her mother. It is nice to have someone so focused on one thing that they kind of are oblivious about others such as love or the outside world. I think it is adorable the she love she cute things but won’t mention it without blushing. All and all I love that she chose to go to Gertie’s instead of being found and such. I really like the character and can’t wait to see her in action!
I think Maybell is going to be adorable, I just hope she doesn't get shoved in the bag of holding. O.O
Her need to solve problems may be a problem but I really like that as a character trait. The party really is going to have a lot of different situations that don't favor curtain members of the party. And this really makes me look forward to seeing what kind of trouble or band of misfits is going to get into.
Overall I really like Rhaya, her kind of combat expertise is probably going to be needed down the line. Though I feel her medium spells are a little strange, I might just be misunderstanding something. But 6-10 minutes delays on her wind wall/ tempest strike? That seems like a really long time for something that is to be used in combat.
Aside from that though she looks great. And I'm excited to she her run around with the gang.
Maybell certainly is a unique one, and I'm not saying that just because of the species and the fact that she's just two feet tall and scampers around... okay, fine, it is probably 80% of the reason.
It was rather short compared to the others, but it was fine. It got me a look into the character and she's quite adorable. She's not much for fighitng, but definitely would help when they go around trying to figure out how things work. Francis would definitely have befriended her quickly because she seems like the type be quiet while reading.
Ah yes, my fellow human. My more useful human. Ha! In any case, what only sidetracked me was the fact that her cold wind was '40 and 50 degrees in temperature' and I just had to process the fact that you meant Fahrenheit.
In any case, I like the fact that Rhaya wasn't here because she lost her parents but for another reason entirely and just joined the hunt because she just wanted to. Her people pleaser attitude and the fact that she always wants to be friends with everyone is sure to get us in some trouble within the group considering Valeo, our resident half-daemon.
Expect Francis to be the one to tell her about her mistakes and her denseness... he may or may not start poking her with the scabbard to catch her attention.
Species: Dhampir: Dhampirs work a little differently than a normal vampire. First off is their ability to withstand sunlight, though it still burns their skin terribly and hurts to stand in for long periods of time, it won't ultimately lead to their demise on its own. But their skin isn't the only thing sensitive to light, their eyes are also sensitive to light, this is both a perk and a hindrance.
A balanced Species overview. I have nothing further to say, as I will not ask for a revision, because I believe this species overview serves it purpose. However, for future advice, it would also have been nice to dive into Dhampir "culture". In Pathfinder they would be described as nomads drifting from town to town. I tried not to give too much in hopes that you would play around more with the concept. This is suitable and fine, a little bit of advice for later on to flesh out the prospects of his adult life.
Description: Archibald Insists on wearing simpler cheap clothes, not getting the whole deal with fancy clothes. Although he's a Dhampir his appearance is on the human side lacking any actual hint of being half vampire. He is a rather small boy for his ages, only being 133.6cms tall and weighs about 20 kilograms. Any trinkets he carries are either on his belt or in his backpack.
Short and sweet. The picture serves to highlight and portray the character, though there is more to a character than just sight, but sound as well as the way they smell. Again passable, but for the future try to get into more than just the surface and use the appearance to highlight the five senses of appearance. The way someone smell reminds us just as much features of them as the physical.
No complaints from me. He feels his age. Encompassing in that I see no problems with his Skills either, they seem appropriate for his age.
I have nothing to say about his battle profile either. It feels appropriate for his age, I like the fact he does not have a designate style of training. It is fitting and suitable.
Lesser Spells
I feel like he could be powered up just a little. Tap and Water bomb are suitable. And I like them. But I feel;
Bucket:This spell allows you to control a small amount of water, it's a weak form of hydrokinesis. It's applications are mainly supportive things, but it can be used to dump a decent amount of water on a target, provided water is present to be used.
Is redundant with water bomb and you can by the third spell give him a little bit of more power with this spell.
Intermediate skills and misc battle information seems reasonable and suitable to me. I like both. I have no comments.
I will be frank and say that this is probably the weakest element of the sheet. While it is written concisely and cohesively. I wish there would have been more effort to have been made. An exchange of how Arcadis and Viola met. You could have taken the opportunity to write their history and end it on leaving Archibald. I wish there had been more. That you played more, used this section to your advantage. Otherwise, it is nice and concise, and it simplicity also serves it purpose. So for that I praise it.
Overview; I think Archibald is a wonderful character. You have managed to capture what a 10 year old is, not just what a 10 year old feels like that. With that I feel like Archibald will serve the team well enough. The only revision you need to change is Bucket, to give him a spell with a bit more bite.
Verdict: Accepted per the change in the spell section
Species Half Celestial - One of many different types of non-human beings who share the godlike/holy characteristics of being more powerful, longer-lived, and, in general, much happier than humans. They tend to live peaceful lives, never staying in one spot long as they love to wander and fight of dark souls that come along their paths to protect others. They grant wishes and miracles to those that are in need though they are rarely seen. Those that have seen Celestials describe them as soft and calming, giving a sense of peace even in the darkest of times to those that are near. Their smell changing to suit each person's senses and always seeming to draw the light to them. They can have up to six wings in total, three pairs each, but each extra set it earned with time and the wings are almost always the palest of colors with accented tips. The most common being white with golden tips.
I have the same general advice. While the description serves it purpose. I wish there had been played around with more. Create a Goddess. Also you forgo abilities of the species, so I am a little uncertain of what they do. I would have given them Disease Resistance, makes it harder for them to get sick. A spice up. This is optional changes. I am not asking for these changes. I wish to have seen more and to have their own feel.
Description The sounds of a rippling stream echoed through a silent forest. The night air bringing a slight chill from the gentle summer breeze which carried with it the pleasant smell of pine. The shadows danced in the light of the moon as the trees shifted in the wind, fireflies twinkling their own luminescence to chase away any fear of the darkness along the narrow path. The dried needles on the forest floor crunched under each step forward with no destination in hand but the hope for a clearing to appear along the way. As if your prayers had been heard, the illumination of pure moonlight showed ahead which were the telltale signs of an opening in the vast amount of trees that made up this forest. A rush of excitement flooded your being and your pace quickens from the relaxed one that you had been content with earlier.
I had a lot of fun plotting ideas with you. And what you took from that plotting is a beautiful prose. I have to say that I adored every minute of this description piece. You have the talent and the strength to create this beautiful imagery alongside this beautiful energy. I have to say this is my favorite appearance description in a long time. Kudos.
She is calm in the face of adversity. When presented keeps calm and focuses on the issue.
Could be written; When in the presence of adversity she keeps calm, and focuses on the issue.
Struck out to me as a little awkward to read.
Otherwise I have no other comments. It is a pretty good run of the mill personality. I enjoyed it, it was a lovely read. Again you have a great knowledge of word usage. Which I like. I wish more of Astraea stood out to me to make her more of a whole person. She feels one note to me. Again it is an optional revision from me. I wish she had something that would make her stand out, prejudice maybe against those that judged her, maybe she does get violent with injustice as we are discussing in the discord.
Skills look fine. They are reasonable to who she is as an individual. I have no comments.
Perfect. Love it all. I have no other comments to make about this section. It is short and too the point. Which can be good sometimes. Love it.
All seems good. I have no comments about this section. It all works together. Good job.
It is this and your appearance that stood out to me in the most in your sheet. I love both. They are elegant. They paint a beautiful picture and I really have nothing to say about your tale. Because I quite frankly enjoyed reading every moment of it.
Overview; Astraea looks like she will be a good sensible ground for the character. I enjoyed your sheet and do not have any revisions for you other than optional revisions that you may ignore.
Bug-folk are a varied group, taking after the many genus of insect-like creatures in humanoid form. They most often retain some attributes or abilities of the true insects they draw inspiration from. While the communities of bug-folk can often be rather separate and divisive they have taken to congealing into larger communities despite the food chain their progenitors once belonged to. Bug-folk do not in fact partake in hunting each other in any form of cannibalism, though it was at a point tradition to stay within groups of bug-folk of the same kind.
The more unique choice out of the group. And to be frank, I give you props for really thinking outside of the box with that one. I really like the Silk Moth Bug Folk and cannot wait to bring them more into this tale. For being creative and imaginative I give you a applause. Good job.
Description: Simon stands at roughly 4"9, not being particularity short or tall considering his age. Like many bug folk he is quite light despite his size, weighing somewhere in the ballpark of 90 lbs. His person is often smudged with oil in places. Bumps and scratches appear all over and are promptly covered with an array of colorful band-aids. His voice is slightly awkward in a way that's hard to describe. A little higher pitched then one might expect, with slight accents on certain vowels. His pronunciation of words lean to what he thinks sound good instead of what are etymologically correct. His eyes appear luminous in dark locations, though they are instead reflective; rather than giving off their own light.
It is simple and gets to the point. I have no problem with simple descriptions, they get to the point and are straight forward. For someone who drew their character, you have little visual context. Which is interesting. Not bad. Just weakens a creation from your own mind. No changes needed to made. Merely an observation.
Persona
Like many of the current proposed cast, it seems the purposed strengths are talkative and easy to get along with. Despite that I really find your neutrals and flaws to be more interesting than your strengths. Which is shame, because I love the idea of this individual working to their own music. It be nice if that musical quality was brought more into your strengths and the character was fleshed out beyond being nice and independent. Which is a criticism I had of some of the sheets and may repeat myself once or twice. This again is general advice with optional revisions.
Skills, Neutral, and Flaws really flesh out Simon. I wish his strengths were as standout as they were. They are what makes Simon unique. And I liked those qualities.
Battle Profile
As we talked before, I absolutely enjoy this. It is unique. It refreshing. I love an engineer rifle user. I have no comments about this part of your sheet.
Magic Profile
Perfect. Everything about this feels unique. I loved the spells. I loved the misc battle info. These are the standouts of your sheet. And stood out with a concrete design in mind.
Tale
I liked the fairy tale aspect of this. The way it was written. We had this discussion on the discord. My preference is more of a history like Astraea or even look at Arisen sheet. Mainly because I feel like I am being told the emotions and not feeling the emotions. You lose a lot of emotional weight, by not exploring them. Otherwise, I enjoyed the tale, and again these are not revisions to be made, they are meant to be advice for the next you build a sheet.
Overview; I feel the personality is a bit weak, I also feel the description is also a bit weak and the tale. It is the same thing I said about Archibald. While simple is good and getting to the point is good, I am disappointed that someone can draw a character and not have this abundance of visual design in mind for their character. Otherwise, the battle profile, the species, and the mechanical work is nicely written and I enjoyed them.
Verdict: I'd like to see some more reviews and thoughts on Simon from the other cast members. Preferable Arisen and Maybell who have not gotten around to it. Pending Acceptance.
Description: Francis lets out a noble aura, as was taught to him ever since he was a child. Standing straight and confident, his strides are long and sure. His movements are graceful but precise. There is nothing in his body language that would reflect the insecurities within. The expression on his face when he isn't with anyone is usually just a neutral face plastered on - often seen as bored or lonely. It is reminiscent of a look that someone has when he's mourning, or when he's remembering something that can be considered as 'sad' or a 'horrible' memory.
Yes please more. I enjoyed read your description of Francis. He exudes this princely aura and I felt like he was coming alive off the page. I absolutely enjoyed the way you worded information. I loved the way it was organized. This is how to get to the point, be simple, but still be able to give character to the individual you are creating. Kudos.
Persona
It seems like everyone is taking, doesn't get bothered by much classes. With that out of the way I actually feel like Francis' strength is his weakest part of his personality sheet. While reasonable it comes off very stereotypical, something you'd expect from a noble. I wish to have seen some quirks in personality. A break in the mold maybe. Of course this is optional. With Idris redacted, I don't have any more comments on the flaws because they no longer conflict with another's character and neither does his strength. The skills to the persona all equal what a noble person might have been. However, I would suggest, optional, that because he was orphaned at a young age you could drop in some other elements.
Battle Profile
One of your stronger sections. I enjoyed reading this portion of the sheet as well. It is a good setup and I love when not every character is magey. And that's what I am enjoying so far out of the potential cast members. Francis has good setup and balance.
Magic Profile
Traditional and classic. I respect the classics. Again I like how Francis doesn't lean too much into the sorcerer box.
Tale
Another well written tale. I liked the storybook element of the way it was written. I enjoy this idea of being able to explore this family curse. That will be a very interesting arc. To see who cursed them and why. I enjoy a good mystery and to figure out the clues. I really look forward to this aspect of Francis. My only criticism would be that instead of writing it as a narrative, you gave lots of exposition. I enjoy feeling what a character feels then knowing what a character knows. Otherwise though I thoroughly enjoyed the tale.
Overview; You have a solid concrete idea and I enjoy Francis. I cannot wait to make a curse arc, because that will be fuuun. However, just as I have told Akay, Dead, and now you. The personality strengths are weak. And do not shake up much. It lacks creativity and punch. However, this is not asking for a revision. If you want to revise it is up to you. Just as it is up to everyone else.
@AngelofOctober's Profile with Fire in my belly; sorry but I had to do a Fairy Tail reference. xD
Valeo's Profile
The first thing I got to say congrats on finishing this profile, it has been in the making. :)
Species:
This entire section + his description was amazing to read. It was very great to read all that orange text, in the full glory of everything. I loved the picture you drew of him. I enjoyed the updates in the gallery.
Persona:
His entire persona, his flaws, his strengths, his hobbies and even his skills are great. In terms its all compacted in one decent package of awesome. I still like his coffee habit, that gave me a smile.
Battle Profile:
His entire battle profile is great. I like the simplicity of his Axe, I definitely like his Ring of Animal Friends since it allows him to talk to animals, even though the old person he got it from, he sees it as unimportant. Magnar, his tiger cub friend. Who became his Tiger Mount is great. This battle profile feels concise and great.
Magic Profile:
I like all the smart comments, within the Magic section specifically his spell book, "My brain, is the spell book duh." <-- Though slightly different from what I wrote anyway but still the point get across.
I like that his focus, is literally everything that isn't in a big city ala, Primordial Magic. Kinda made me flashback to watching that one arc in Fairy Tail, where all the evil wizards were searching for it. Idk, why I got that thought into my head. I do like, it is unique compared to the schools of focus' other people have.
Sedation - A pretty unique counter spell, that increases the time of doing an action on anyone he uses it on. This is great spell.
Rupture - I loved this spell, since it can break a bone or break a non-magical weapon in half. And it was definitely shown in his tale, that was really fun to see that happened to those paladins. Hehe.
Abyssal Torture - This spell comes in different three flavors of hot sauce, the Blades is the Source Hot sauce. the fireballs is Cajohn's Bourbon Infused Chipotle Habanero Hot Sauce and finally the third and most dangerous option its like tasting a Ghost Pepper Hot sauce. I can't believe, I did a Hot Sauce Reference for a spell of all things.
Imitator - "Haha, you are dumb now I cast your spell at you and you die!" In terms, it is a great spell for mimic someone's spells that would be powerful or otherwise.
Misc Battle Info - I definitely like this battle info section, of his profile. Great job on everything in his battle profile / Magic profile section.
Your Tale of Oblivion:
Every single chapter of this tale felt like Valeo was going on a journey to find himself and then find Gertrude. In terms of the first parts before he ran into those religious nut jobs. This has been said already in the discord itself, but everything in this section is wonderful. Including all the song choices for each chapter. And his theme song fits too, and all the other music choices you picked for him. Even though I didn't really listen to all of it. Mostly because I wanted to read everything and imagine it with my own set of musical parameters, but it would've probably been a good idea to listen to the songs, when I was reading, probably would've been more immersive for me.
But nonetheless, it doesn't detract from the profile as a whole.
I am finished with my final profile review.
*snickers at my hot sauce reference, when reviewing the Abyssal Torrent Spell.* xD
Okay, I am going to say it. I really really didn't want to let go of Idris but I love Valeo. His profile actually inspired me to want to kick some butt but also inspired me in terms of Celestials. I loved the stories and the subtle growth here and there for Valeo as a person. I love that his tale felt like it was full of signs and almost as if fate brought him where he needed to go. His skills are perfect for his personality and the coffee and bad poetry made me laugh. I feel like this was a great balance to the group and I really don't have anything negative that pops out at me. It was a very moving profile and I am impressed with everything you were able to do in such a short time frame. The length and personally drawing an amazing picture for your profile just a few of the things that come to mind.
Welp that was another long ass CS, a good read to be sure. Masterfully written as per usual, with the added bonus of a self drawn character art (I respect that shit, good job.) He does seem like a bit of an ass but for someone who went through what he has, I'd say he's doing alright not being a total anti life murder fuck machine.
Though when we get to his magic this is where I hit a bit of a snag. Rapture as it is now feels completely broken (no pun intended). Breaking armor and weapons that aren't enchanted is fine by me, but breaking bones that are still inside someone? I personally thing that's a little more potent than a Medium spell let alone a lesser spell. And the wording is kinda weird too, Any living creatures targeted by the spell will not be affected physically, instead most ordinary people will hear an internal crack. The spell instead breaks their bone. Not being affected physically? A broken bone seems pretty Physical. I honestly feel this spell needs to be change in some capacity, be it that it simply chips bones or that it just doesn't affect organics entirely (I know this messes with the story you have written) I mean what's to stop him from just breaking something skull and instantly kill it?
Now there is also him being able to pretty much just melt people's faces into juicy slag. Now he does need to get really close to pull this off, and it's not like they are just going to stand still as they feel themselves being turned to goo. Unless of coarse he breaks their leg using the aforementioned Rapture spell rendering them severely handicapped and pretty much done for.
I do understand he should be powerful, being the half spawn of Igni. But then that's just it, he's the half spawn of a vastly powerful demon lord of oblivion! What the hell does he need the rest of the people for? Not only does he not need them for protection because he is easily the most powerful, but he doesn't need them to be able to survive the wilderness because he already know how to do that better than everyone else too.
He just feels like the obvious "Main protagonist" or "Chosen one" who is simply better than the rest, and honestly doesn't need them. Unless he runs into some strong wizards then he's right as rain. I don't know if I'm misunderstanding his strength or anything like that, but it just feels like everyone else would be weighing him down on this adventure.
That major gripe out of the way I want to talk about all the shit I like, that being basically every other aspect of the CS. His occasional tactless way of speaking is for sure going to cause some tension at some point, and that I do look forward to. Him and Sith bring a little bit of fire to the table that is sure to get some shit cooking at times, making sure that the RP isn't a love fest the entire time. Him being half demon will give him something to talk about with Archy probably, and it'd also make him one of the two poor suckers who can't be healed by dear old Celestial sis.
I think Valeo is amazing, and the amount of effort and detail you put into him is astronomical. I just ask you take into consideration what I've said. Either way I'll love to see Archy break down all those barriers Valeo has put up with sheer adorableness. Archy will fall into the barriers if he needs to!
(edit. Me and Angel done the talk. And the fella seems alright after a good discussion.)
I was told to do a review and honestly I was kind of avoiding doing so. So I remember the conversation we had about getting straight to point versus my long sheets. And while yes, my sheets were long, my descriptions are minimal a paragraph, and max two paragraphs. It is detailed, but it is simply detailed to get the picture. I am not trying to compare myself to you, what I am trying to point out is your simple philosophy bit you in the ass.
All your character right now is Magic and Battle Profile, without a name. Who is Simon? Because I do not know who he is. Your description is great, but flat. You forgot all the emotions and hand gestures and body language people use. You forgot to make your character alive because we present our appearances physically. His personality is painfully plain.
Generic flaws and generic strengths. And the tale. Makes me feel nothing. You just sum up stuff in the dryest exposition history that makes me shrugs. Who cares? Because I do not care. If you read the actual explanation of Arrival, it ask for their trials and tribulations. I got none of that from this sheet.
Simon does not make me excited. And it is probably, and I mean no offense, why he hasn't been included in much of other's CS. Because no one knows who Simon is and to be honest, I really do not care at the state he is. Cool an engineer. But he has no personality.
Bug-folk are a varied group, taking after the many genus of insect-like creatures in humanoid form. They most often retain some attributes or abilities of the true insects they draw inspiration from. While the communities of bug-folk can often be rather separate and divisive they have taken to congealing into larger communities despite the food chain their progenitors once belonged to. Bug-folk do not in fact partake in hunting each other in any form of cannibalism, though it was at a point tradition to stay within groups of bug-folk of the same kind. Butterfly-folk with Butterfly-folk and Beetle-folk with Beetle-folk etc etc. As the wilds are harsh and the larger communities of singular species bug-folk have dissolved, most bug-folk stick together among other species to ensure strength in numbers.
The Silk-moth-folk in particular retain abilities of flight, albeit in varying degrees of success. Some also retain the trademark ability to weave silk strands, though much like original silk-moths, this is a trait often lost after the "larval" or youth stages in one's life. While some bug-folk take after specific stages of insect life-cycles like cocoon-folk, Simon in particular is not of the larval variety, and therefore does not have this ability despite his younger age.
Description: Simon stands at roughly 4"9, not being particularity short or tall considering his age. Like many bug folk he is quite light despite his size, weighing somewhere in the ballpark of 90 lbs. His person is often smudged with oil in places. Bumps and scratches appear all over and are promptly covered with an array of colorful band-aids. His voice is slightly awkward in a way that's hard to describe. A little higher pitched then one might expect, with slight accents on certain vowels. His pronunciation of words lean to what he thinks sound good instead of what are etymologically correct. His eyes appear luminous in dark locations, though they are instead reflective; rather than giving off their own light.
Persona
Strengths: Simon can often be described as duplicitous in nature. While he seems one way at times, he's the total opposite at others. He alternates from being loud and outgoing to being quiet and reserved. He is often fairly opinionated though he knows how to hold his tongue. Most of the time. Once he's settled in with someone and decided he likes them, he acts rather nice and tries very hard to keep them close. Otherwise he tends to have his guard up, keeping people at arms length with jokes and fake smiles. Simon is supportive, and he likes to reinforce his friends with positivity. Whether not such honeyed words come across as sincere, is another tale.
One of Simon's key strengths is his work ethic. He will skip nights of sleep or meals to continue working on something he's invested in. He's almost fanatical in some ways; less worrying about perfection and much more so making a splash. He enjoys grand displays, and is roped into things by such displays. If you want to win Simon over, you just need to be earnest. Having some fireworks will help too though.
Simon marches to the beet of his own drum, and wavering him from that beat is nigh impossible. Come hell or high-water he will live his way. He isn't the type to give up on things or people, cherishing memories like gold. He will work as hard as he can to uplift his brothers and sisters to his own level, should he feel they are less joyful than he is.
He is incredibly determined, and hard to dissuade off of something he's set his mind to. He's the sort to do something even if it's impossible, because he thinks there's value in trying regardless. He never expects perfection from anyone or anything, though he is still a firm believer that something can always be improved.
Flaws: A schemer, he may not always mean what he is saying. While not malicious they can be an opportunist. Likes to hear gossip though isn't one for spreading it around; unless it helps him in some way. Generally sort of nosy, he likes to be in the know about pretty much anything. His jokes can go too far at times; not in the way of being rude, more so in taking light of a situation. Not a very trusting person, it takes him some time to really open up to others.
Simon is the sort to take a victory and run with it, even if that means seeming the smaller person. He will lord such victories over others, with a sort of "all's fair in love and war" mentality. He is not above cheating, though he often values people's feelings to much to do it in regards to people he is close to. His pride is in constant flow and he might sometimes act rashly for it, while other times throwing it to the wayside. Hes's a touch unpredictable if not well rounded.
He's quite a stubborn person. While this can seem like a good thing at times with knowing what he likes and so on; it's gotten him into hot water before. If he thinks he's right, or even he can't give up on something, he'll stick to his guns. To him information is something that's hard to change once he gets it in his head, and sometimes he finds it hard to do it someone else's way if he doesn't agree with it.
Neutral: Works with a sort of "beat" always tapping their foot or making clicking noises with their tongue; it comes out whenever they focus on something intently.
Should he take a particular attachment to something he will value it to an almost obsessive amount. This could be people or items, or even places. Sentiment and feelings guide him despite his mechanical way of thinking. He would gladly trade all the money to his name if he could buy back something he lost. He's the sort to buy a pretty item, and hide it away so that it never gets tarnished. Protective and self destructive he can sometimes jeopardize the bigger picture in favor of taking hold of whats in front of him.
Skills: Engineer: He pulls things apart to put back together, or fix things if asked to. Machinery are the love of his life and he can be found often messing with some contraption. He has a very analytic mind when it comes to handling tasks, and he doesn't give up easy on solving a problem.
Eagle-Eye: Simon is a talented marksman. This wasn't entirely a natural occurrence, but brought on from weeks upon weeks of getting used to his own weapon. His eyesight is sharp and his aim now true. He is good at spotting moving things, or points of interest in a landscape. Such as a good position to set up a sniper camp. He's attentive and good to have on guard, or helpful to lookout for a sign.
Quiet: Despite his somewhat less than pragmatic style Simon is good at switching to silent step. He uses this often to sneak back into his workshop or stay up late reading. He might sneak out to take shots a good distance away or poke around in other's things. He's patient when it comes to avoiding another's gaze and knows when to move to remain unseen. Another talent polished in his strict regiment of self marksman training.
Battle Profile
Focal Crystal: Orange smooth and flat; perfect as a skipping stone. Set into the stock of Simon's custom sniper rifle, it ripples with light from the center every time he fires the weapon. Big enough to fit in the palm of your hand, but difficult to fully wrap your fingers around.
Special Equipment:
Longshot: Simon's aforementioned rifle and his pride and joy. Holds a moderate capacity of custom bullets per clip. These bullets are fashioned from cruz crystals. The firing mechanism means the bullets are propelled via magic rather than black-powder. The distance at which these bullets travel effectively is at maximum 80 ft. As a custom piece of work this weapon needs to be maintained while on the road, and has it's chances of malfunctions.
Buddy the Tool Box: Simon's enchanted toolbox nicknamed Buddy. It's enchanted effect is to place whatever tool Andy asks for at the ready, it can also places small machine parts at the ready as well. This allows for quick and efficient work even on the road.
Equipment:
Simon keeps an assortment of mundane tools hidden on his person. An alan-key here and a screwdriver there...
Workers Eye: A monocle with a set of different lenses that can be lowered over the eye. They each have a different thickness/bend to them, making some "zoom" in more than others. Good for delicate work.
Turret Parts: The components for small turrets of Simon's design. Each case is about the size of a lunchbox, and weigh 10 pounds each. One is hooked onto each hip. Take ample time to set up are only good in short bursts. Actual abilities described in spell list.
Weapon:
Arclight Spanner: Despite the fancy name it's actually just a rather large bolt-wrench. Good for whackin.
Brass Knuckles: While Simon's punch is less than stellar, it helps to throw some metal into the equation.
Special Attacks:
Moth Flash: Some Moth-Folk are able to create burst of defensive bioluminescence. As with many other bioluminscent creatures this light is created through a chemical reaction within certain cells of the creature. For moth folk this flash is created along the cell lining of their wing membrane, and antennae. By quickly fluttering their wings they tense small muscle linings used to aid in flight, which allow for the chemicals to mix creating the flash of light. The quick "shutter" effect of the wings opening and closing rapidly help to aid in confusing a target of this effect. This ability can't be used too often, due to how the actual muscle and cell linings work within the Moth-folks wings. It's used to either dazzle light sensitive prey/predators or work as a distraction for group hunting.
Magic Profile
Magic Lv: 5
Spellbook: A small notebook for the breast-pocket. Brown leather-bound with tan vellum pages. Notes and schematics poke out in places, with noticeable loose-leaf papers tucked against it's spine. A shimmering gold gear is emblazoned onto the cover. Smells faintly of oil and lit candles.
School of Focus: WORKSHOP MAGIC
Spells:
Lesser Spells: (3)
Ricochet: Implanting this spell into a bullet, Simon may create a magical "mirror" of sorts. When this bullet reaches a certain distance decided by Simon, it will bounce of an instantaneous reflective surface of magic. Depending on the angle this may allow Simon to hit multiple enemies or make shots that would be impossible by mundane means. The bullet cannot travel farther than it's usual 80 feet, and he has to be able to see the point of reflection on moment of firing.
Double-Time: This spell kicks Simon as well as his weapon into a higher gear. For a short moment they receive a burst of speed, allowing Simon to attack twice in the span of time he would usually attack once.
Brain-Drain: This spell increases the speed at which Simon can comprehend and intake information. He often uses it to speed along the invention or upgrading of items. This can also be used though to take a comprehensive look of a battlefield or collection of enemies in an instant. Continuous use of this spell in a row will cause great headaches, and in the worst documented case even nosebleeds.
Medium Spells: (1)
Animate Arms: This spell allows near instant construction of small clockwork turrets. These are automated turrets running on magical energy. They decide on who is friend or foe based on Simon's perception. They will fire on enemies with rapid needle projectiles within 25 ft. They cannot be moved after created and immediately fall apart after using their ammunition, or after 1 minute. The parts are not created, and Simon must carry them at all times. Cannot create more than two turrets, the turrets must be within 10 ft of each other. They will fall apart should Simon leave a 30 ft radius of either turret. They are not particularity resilient, and will be destroyed with ample force.
Misc Battle Info: Simon fights from the back-lines, supporting his allies with high damaging and precise shots. His style is to be efficient rather than overwhelming; will use his fire to corral enemies towards advantageous positions for his allies. While he lacks many spells or machinery that can do this to start; his plan is to create drones that might take the brunt of damage instead of his friends. All in all he hopes to be the ultimate backbone for his party of ruffians.
Your Tale
"This is your tale, this is the sounds, and the tale you tell:"
A woman sit's against the wall on the head of her bed. Cross legged in a night-gown, she smoothly pens words into a fresh journal. A recently filled clone of this book sitting atop some other tomes on the table at her side. She is a younger woman, though her eyes speak of experience, full not only with knowledge of life but a bright thirst for more. Sweeping across the curving letters she made she smiled softly to herself, a familiar sound of clinking, metal on metal lightly emanating from a room over. Her hair and skin were pale white, with inhuman eyes and features denoting her Bug-Folk heritage. Her eyes seemed to glow lightly in the dimmed candle-lit room, she found little trouble navigating her language onto the page. Her thought pouring into it, he hand never stopping.
"We're finally taking off! Leaving the safety of the barrier to forge a path back to a forgotten home! It's so exciting, I'm just itching to leave in the morning. I'm supposed to be the sensible one and yet I'm too excited to sleep. Germaine seems to be on edge too, although I can tell he's less excited and more anxious; but what else is new? He's been sitting at his table taking apart and putting together my rifle for hours now. I swear, that thing never misfires and yet he's always so worried about it. I appreciate his care but he still needs to learn to roll with the punches; you can't be ready for everything.
Although if there was one things I'm worried about, it's our boy. What if he gets sick and we don't have medicine? What if I miss the only shot that matters? What if Germaine's machines falter, and something sneaks into our caravan? Ah, I shouldn't worry so much; our little cog is made of sterner stuff than that. I've seen him land face first so often since he's gotten his wings, and he's never cried once.
...
I hope we're doing the right thing. It's hard to say whether the risk to our immediate family is worth the risk to our people as a whole...
Ah, I really should get some sleep now. I'll write up another update when we're actually on the road."
-Sera
A small family of three, with three wagons left the Galaxy Villa; treading a near forgotten path taken generations ago by other non-humans to find respite from the wilds, within those walls of magic.
"As to be expected thing's won't be as simple as we'd hoped. We'd spent too long in between the planning and preparation stages before our departure. The gaurd we spoke to on our way past the cities walls informed us of some pretty severe flooding of the great river near Star City. We'll have to take the longer way towards Cosmo, re-supply there and then hope to cross through the cold forest taiga. The wetlands must be rather treacherous this time of year as well...
If only time weren't such a factor perhaps we could have waited some months before leaving."
-Sera
A figure sits among some boxes, metal crates filled with different small gears or brass piping. Pulled over to the side of the road, a caravan of three covered wagons is shaped into a "U" formation, wrapping under a large tree providing some pleasant shade in the surprisingly harsh sun. an odd metal desk that seemed to unfold like an accordion was being set up, the man on the box moved it with familiarity and ease; as he should, considering he designed it.
A father and husband, the man had broad shoulders though an overall thin figure. His eyes were etched with nights spent working, and his hands stained with traces of oil and soot. He differed from his wife and child, being of Bug-Folk origin, though taking after a different species altogether. The mantis man had startling eyes of bright yellow, light greenish skin and a thicker carapace over his arms and hands. The concentrated look in his eyes, and seeming unbreakable crinkle of his brow made him seem far more disagreeable than was true.
Once he set his custom workbench out over his lap, he withdrew a small leather tome from his breast pocket, and took a small metal pen to it's pages.
"We've been traveling for nearly a week now. We're going slower than I hoped; the horses seem to have trouble with all the metal we carry.
Sera's note taking is becoming infectious. I find myself contemplating making entries like she does, and I fear I may be doing it as we speak.
Of course we're not speaking, I am writing.
It's sunny today, far more than anticipated with all the rain as of late. It's a nice change of pace I suppose but I'm not fond of the heat.
Sera and Simon are enjoying the clear sky. We've stopped by a small lake to cool off.
People are funny creatures. We complained so often on our trip about the rain, and now that's it clear we go swimming.
Well, they do at least. I have machines to work on.
I would never forgive myself if these turrets failed when it mattered. The rain is threatening their more intricate circuitry. Good to have a dryer day like today to fix things."
In the corner of the sheet, a signature denoting a capital "G" is found. Depicted to look like a small gear of a sort, teeth running along it's rounded side.
"Another rainy day, it's really coming down. The water pelting off of the canvas roof would be relaxing in any other situation. We hardly managed across the first river in our path. The bridge was still standing though some heavy flow from a mountain was bringing down dirt and logs. I thank whatever gods exist for not letting it break until we were over.
Our little boy is scared of the thunder. The poor thing has been shaking at my side for hours. It's later now and he's still with sleep, but my heart still feels heavy. Every day I have to remind myself that this is for his good as well, but the guilt of dragging him through this is getting a lot to bear.
No matter. When we're all settled in our new home, we'll do everything to keep him happy. An entire community will be in our debt; and I'll make sure he is able to enjoy their appreciation."
-Sera
In the dark of night, a crackling sound was all it took. One misstep and a loud shot rang out, metal barrel screaming with heat.
A sharp whine of pain, and the feral dog went down.
"We need light Germaine! They travel in packs!"
The man had been asleep seconds before, rushing up from his weary state he moved to flick the lamps on. With a simple flip of a switch small caged bulbs running along the lengths of the carts lit up one by one. Each one casting another myriad of shadows across the nearby foliage of the forest. With deeper insight into the greenery, pairs of reflected eyes could be seen within view. The family wasn't alone, and of the two; their group was less hungry.
"Time to move. I'll watch out left, keep your machines on the right and back end! Shout if you need me."
The rifle-woman slid the bolt action lever back on her weapon, a metal casing clattering to the wooden floor bellow. A small figure clung to his mothers boot, the young Simon shook, his teeth clicking slightly in his skull. He knew his mum wouldn't miss, but she said there were a lot of them.
It was always a lot. This whole trip was a lot. His little mind couldn't understand a lot.
Not yet.
"We survived an ordeal a few days back. I've kept from writing it until now, I don't know why.
Perhaps I was scared of committing to paper. To admitting our mistakes in such a permanent manner. We're traveling faster now, but we're also getting more desperate. We lost a cart to the woods, full of metal and food; it was enough to keep the pack of beasts at our heels, rather than our throats.
I wasn't fast enough to keep them all away, and I suffered for it. My left arm took a horrible bite, I can't lift my rifle properly now. I was stupid and I might have cost a lot of people the help we promised to bring. I am so tired now. I don't know how husband stays awake so often. I'm used to camping out for the right moment, the right shot. But this is a tired I am alien to. My heart is faltering, my mind exhausted. Ah well, no going back now. This will be the last I complain on these pages. I'm the spine of this family, I can't break. It's only uphill from here, happiness is on it's way. I'm sure of it. "
-Sera
"The damn things broke.
We can't stop to fix them, but the river crushed my turrets with their choppy water.
Sera's arm isn't looking any better.
What have we doomed ourselves to?"
A familiar "G" symbol, marks the page.
The only things Simon can remember are the claws.
Three nails, sharp and jagged, raking across his body.
Whatever it was, it was big yet fast; he didn't even see the thing before feeling the scream of pain across his abdomen and face.
Just below his eyes, across his chest and above his waist three bleeding streaks sent him flying backwards.
Off of the cart, away from mothers protection. His head struck a rock, and he was taken by the blackness of unconsciousness.
While his mother and father, were simply taken.
----------
The two cart caravan was stopped by heavy mud and displaced tree roots. Pulled up from the earth by the wrath of a storm, the gnarled tree took hold of the left-side front wheel. The clattering of metal, wood and loose contraptions sliding into each other awoke something within the woods. It's hard to say exactly did what happened that night, the only survivor awoke in a warm bed, staring at a ceiling that was new to him.
The young moth child didn't take to the news well. An older woman offered him a new life, tender care and a family. And he refused.
For three nights and days, he refused. Continuously clambering out bed, hitting the floor and re-opening stitches the boy refused.
Life could not change, not so quickly, not to unfairly.
He wouldn't do anything to accept it. If he refused enough, it couldn't be truth anymore.
He was offered soup, hearty yet easy to eat.
He refused.
He was offered fresh bandages, clean and willing to help him heal.
He refused.
Until Simon could not anymore, he refused.
He was offered a new life.
He was offered warmth, friends, a place to build, unity, aid, clean water, fresh food, stability.
Everything he missed, everything he yearned for on the road.
...
He refused.
Years later, Simon sat at the bedside of Gertrude. The woman who took him in and cleaned his scars, who slowly healed the marks both physical and of the soul. She and her children, were with Simon already half as long as he was with his first family.
In Francis he found stability, Maybell curiosity, Archibald positivity, Valeo a will to live, Rhaya strength, Astrae kindness and Sith wonder.
In Gertrude he had found true, unconditional love.
Here they were, safe and happy. Yet time was cruel, while being infinite it was oh so limited.