EDIT: IGNORE THE TITLE PLEASE. Meant to change it - originally I wasn't gonna write what I did below but just do a stupid mini-story about the vanity of man-pride I've seen at times. xD

Happened a while ago, but I had a very close female friend who my mother once teased me about having a "thing" with. My instinctive retort was to say that the relationship was so platonic that it actually hurt my man-pride - just joking around, of course.
But when it popped into my head just now (Im in a similar situation again, except I actually like this girl this time), it got me thinking. I dont think it applies much to people who arent naturally a little flirty, but for those who are: Do you ever feel a little hurt or offput or whatever by those friendships which aren't just nor sexual or romantic, but seemingly almost actively platonic - so much so that the natural flirtiness you have around others and your other friends dies or gets suppresses?
This is certainly not a whole Fedora Friendzone thing lamenting about the dreadfulness of being ignored, or about how all people of the opposite gender should be dying to flirt with you, or whatever. It's a question for people who like a bit of flirty banter in their friendships and conversations - if someone just utterly doesn't reciprocate that or the dynamic of the friendship means it just doesn't happen, does it make it harder for you to be friends with them or anything?

For me, the answer is "sorta". It won't stop my friendship or anything, or limit how close I get to that person (most of my close friendships are like it, as people just don't expect me to be that sort of character), but for me it feels a little like a certain natural flow or connection isn't quite there for whatever reason. And I sorta end up being slightly guarded about saying certain things or discussing certain topics around those friends, and that creates a thin barrier that can occasionally be surpassed by a friend or acquaintance that that... flirtiness (for want of a better word) exists with.

TL:RD halo had some kind of relationship with a spongebob.character.

Halo, I'm want to respond but I'll wait until you do an edit of that post.

natsumehack said
TL:RD halo had some kind of relationship with a spongebob.character.

Actually...
TL;DR: You have the attention span of a squirrel.

idlehands said
Halo, I'm want to respond but I'll wait til you do an edit of that post.

Edit what, sorry? I know there are some spelling errors 'cause I'm hon my phone but...

TL;DR Halo refuses to talk to women who don't play at being sexually interested in him.

mbl said
TL;DR Halo refuses to talk to women who don't play at being sexually interested in him.

Really? That's what you took from that? I specifically said that the vast majority of my friendships aren't like that precisely so I wouldn't get that sort of crap thrown at me. If I refused to talk to people with no sexual interest in me, I'd have no friends at all :trolleys:. Plus, who said flirting is sexual only?

Halo said
Edit what, sorry? I know there are some spelling errors 'cause I'm hon my phone but...

Ok, that's why. I thought you were drunk.

idlehands said
Ok, that's why. I thought you were drunk.

I'm just sleep-deprived, has the same effect on me. I've slept for about 6 hours since Monday morning and it's currently 5am here.
Probably going to edit it anyway 'cause I'm gonna get the fedoracorps "females must wanna suck my D to be worthy" sticker.

Lol, the only time I get flirty is if I'm in a good mood, and I either like said friend, or, they can easily pass it off as me joking. Or both. Really sad cause half the time it's both if a applies. >_< but I don't find it to be a make or break thing for a relationship. If that's the only thing you've got going for you, then, I dunno...

I understand you man.

Overwatch said
Lol, the only time I get flirty is if I'm in a good mood, and I either like said friend, or, they can easily pass it off as me joking. Or both. Really sad cause half the time it's both if a applies. >_< but I don't find it to be a make or break thing for a relationship. If that's the only thing you've got going for you, then, I dunno...

It's almost the direct opposite - I'm fucking terrible at flirting, I just think it's fun, and it's incredibly unimportant (as I said, the girl I like and me don't have any such dynamic whatsoever). I'm not asking in relevance to my current feelings, they're just what got me thinking about it all, once the conversation from before popped into my head.

I know how it is. There's this girl that I'm good friends with, and we flirt all the time when talk. But, like we're completely platonic. Though, if we lived closer I don't know if things would be platonic or not. And I was about to go on about why that is, but then no one gives a fuck so why even say. In fact, no one actually cares, and I just understand the situation.

what the fuck is flirting

I'm only familiar with berating people

that's a joke don't yell at me :c

TP said
I know how it is. There's this girl that I'm good friends with, and we flirt all the time when talk. But, like we're completely platonic. Though, if we lived closer I don't know if things would be platonic or not. And I was about to go on about why that is, but then no one gives a fuck so why even say. In fact, no one actually cares, and I just understand the situation.

The purpose of posting a thread is for opinions and conversation, and a story about your personal experiences and feelings is far more conducive to that than "I agree." Plus, as you know, Spam does tend towards the "giving a fuck" side of the spectrum when it really comes down to it. So share, because we do care. And stop with the angsty self-pity, you're better than that; don't sabotage yourself if you have something to say and contribute.
Now. What were ya gonna say, man?

Smiral said
what the fuck is flirtingI'm only familiar with berating peoplethat's a joke don't yell at me :c

I'm also very familiar with berating. Hence: *yells*. :P
Nobutsrsly, flirting is when daddy and mummy don't love one another anymore but there's a pretty new secretary at daddy's office...

no it just sounds like you want them to act the way you want.

if someone doesn't respond to/like some aspect of my humor attitude, I adjust it a little. Some people just are the way they are.

Doivid said
no it just sounds like you want them to act the way you want.if someone doesn't respond to/like some aspect of my humor attitude, I adjust it a little. Some people just are the way they are.

Can I cling to you now? Will you stay if I hold your ankles....you're not acting like I want! Stay here!

Doivid said
no it just sounds like you want them to act the way you want.if someone doesn't respond to/like some aspect of my humor attitude, I adjust it a little. Some people just are the way they are.

And... where on earth does it say I want them to change that for my sake? As I explicitly said, most of the people I'm closest to on this planet don't have that dynamic with me, and I'm pretty damn content with that. The only thing I said was that I sometimes have to not say certain things around them - which is "adjusting my humor a little", just as you said. Sorta fail to see why asking people if it affects their friendships with others means I want to bend people to act as I will them to.

based on your op, ofc

> feel a little hurt or offput or whatever

>dies or gets suppresses?

taking it that personally or phrasing it as if it's being done to you is a sign of wanting to control it. There's no reason to feel those things or think of it that way.

no offense tho, just bein realtalk here.