EDIT: IGNORE THE TITLE PLEASE. Meant to change it - originally I wasn't gonna write what I did below but just do a stupid mini-story about the vanity of man-pride I've seen at times. xD
Happened a while ago, but I had a very close female friend who my mother once teased me about having a "thing" with. My instinctive retort was to say that the relationship was so platonic that it actually hurt my man-pride - just joking around, of course.
But when it popped into my head just now (Im in a similar situation again, except I actually like this girl this time), it got me thinking. I dont think it applies much to people who arent naturally a little flirty, but for those who are: Do you ever feel a little hurt or offput or whatever by those friendships which aren't just nor sexual or romantic, but seemingly almost actively platonic - so much so that the natural flirtiness you have around others and your other friends dies or gets suppresses?
This is certainly not a whole Fedora Friendzone thing lamenting about the dreadfulness of being ignored, or about how all people of the opposite gender should be dying to flirt with you, or whatever. It's a question for people who like a bit of flirty banter in their friendships and conversations - if someone just utterly doesn't reciprocate that or the dynamic of the friendship means it just doesn't happen, does it make it harder for you to be friends with them or anything?
For me, the answer is "sorta". It won't stop my friendship or anything, or limit how close I get to that person (most of my close friendships are like it, as people just don't expect me to be that sort of character), but for me it feels a little like a certain natural flow or connection isn't quite there for whatever reason. And I sorta end up being slightly guarded about saying certain things or discussing certain topics around those friends, and that creates a thin barrier that can occasionally be surpassed by a friend or acquaintance that that... flirtiness (for want of a better word) exists with.
Happened a while ago, but I had a very close female friend who my mother once teased me about having a "thing" with. My instinctive retort was to say that the relationship was so platonic that it actually hurt my man-pride - just joking around, of course.
But when it popped into my head just now (Im in a similar situation again, except I actually like this girl this time), it got me thinking. I dont think it applies much to people who arent naturally a little flirty, but for those who are: Do you ever feel a little hurt or offput or whatever by those friendships which aren't just nor sexual or romantic, but seemingly almost actively platonic - so much so that the natural flirtiness you have around others and your other friends dies or gets suppresses?
This is certainly not a whole Fedora Friendzone thing lamenting about the dreadfulness of being ignored, or about how all people of the opposite gender should be dying to flirt with you, or whatever. It's a question for people who like a bit of flirty banter in their friendships and conversations - if someone just utterly doesn't reciprocate that or the dynamic of the friendship means it just doesn't happen, does it make it harder for you to be friends with them or anything?
For me, the answer is "sorta". It won't stop my friendship or anything, or limit how close I get to that person (most of my close friendships are like it, as people just don't expect me to be that sort of character), but for me it feels a little like a certain natural flow or connection isn't quite there for whatever reason. And I sorta end up being slightly guarded about saying certain things or discussing certain topics around those friends, and that creates a thin barrier that can occasionally be surpassed by a friend or acquaintance that that... flirtiness (for want of a better word) exists with.
