[IC] 𝕯𝖚𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖔𝖓𝖘 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝕯𝖔𝖚𝖈𝖍𝖊𝖇𝖆𝖌𝖘

[Little Bill]

[Little Bill]

After waking up POORLY RESTED and HUNGOVER, your party has begun its ADVENTURE. How precious this must be for you. Realizing none of you have any QUESTS in mind you're after, you follow a rumor that there is a SHRIVELED OLD MAN who gives out quests on the edge of town. After scanning the POORER districts of your town for hours, you have finally found the legendary QUEST-GIVER. He beckons you four six to approach him.

His abode reeks of STALE AIR and AMMONIA, and several INFANT SKULLS decorate his BADLY DRAWN TARP. Surely, this is the QUEST-GIVER. Or, just another guy on the edge of town. You found like THIRTY. Inside his ramshackle hut, you hear the cries of ANIMALS and BUBBLING CAULDRONS, which he assures you is what QUESTS sound like when they're being made.

What will you do?

[Little Bill]

>SVENLOTH: Spot check



You look at this BABY BIRD of a human being and deduce he is not the Quest-Giver, based on his CREEPY EYE and PAINT THINNER smell. Granted, you've never met a Quest-Giver, but this guy gives you the HEEBIE-JEEBIES. He probably cavorts with DWARVES too.



I think we should leaves this spooky mans be. He smells like the, how you say, strap of the man's, the underclothings straps what for to keeps your, eh, snausage warm, you know? The, belt, how you say, of the athletical underpants, ya? Jockstrap I think is called. For to play the footsball games and other such things like that.

[JoukaiZachelon]

Your head still hurts from the fucking HANGOVER, you spent 30 of your 31 SILVER COINS and got WASTED faster than you though, but you're ready for ADVENTURE.
You approach the inviting and WELL DRAWED TARP, however the rotten smell of PAINT THINNER makes you want to die, and fast, it probably comes from the ABERRATION in brown rags standing near the entrance, the Elf is already there, what do you do?

> Jaedan: retrieve arms get closer.

Obivously enough, you proceed to talk to the elf.

Hello there Elf guy, is this the questgiver indeed? He looks very suspicious huh? Should we wait for the others before talking to this guy or just do it now?
He stinks so bad, is it some kind of magic or what? :(

[Fubsy]

You awaken with a fuzzy head and no recollection of the TOTALLY DANK NOCTURNAL OCCURRENCES of the previous night. All you remember is taking a single sip of a strange AMBER WATER and passing out shortly after. You vaguely recall someone calling it APPLE JUICE. Nevertheless, you decide to go out with your PARTY in search of ADVENTURE.
Along the way, your party comes across a WRINKLED, TINY FLESH BEING that oddly reminds you of your estranged AUNT KEVIN. Must be the SMELL. Perhaps this SQUISHY HOOMAN can aid you?

Hello, pink meat bundle. Would you be as kind as to--

>Diplomacy Check: FAIL

Maybe you should let someone else handle this...

[Kibaro]

% Steal LOOT

Seeing that your comrades aren't doing anything actually PRODUCTIVE, WASTING their time with some old chap - who actually smells quite pleasant you believe - it's OBVIOUS to you that your party members have 0 points in the APPRAISE STENCH skill. You think about STINKING CASUALLY but then you remembered you ALWAYS do that PASSIVELY everywhere anyway. You decide to follow your INSTINCTS and make some PROGRESS on your "COLLECTIBLES" achievement.

UUUHAHAHA HUUHUHU HAHA HUAHUAHUA! At last! My EFFORTS have been not in vain for Father Nature has BLESSED me once more. This SUPER-DUPER ULTRA MEGA RARE collectible is so RARE that its RARENESS is RARELY demonstrated by the RARE fact that only other FIVE RARELY lucky adventurers have it, besides me who got it trough DAYS of RARELY submitted effort of course.

Time to stash this BAD BOY in my really stylish BAG. Look at that BEAUTY.

You hold it for a few more seconds rubbing it EROTICALLY, spit and rub on it to make it shinier, kiss it then CAREFULLY place it in one of your free BAG SLOTS.

[Sentel]

HISH: contemplate stabbing



You silently observe the SMALL STENCH MAMMAL as your companions interact with it. Your first thought is to DEMONSTRATE your IMPRESSIVE COLLECTION but noticing that nothing about the MAMMAL or its HABITAT looks LUXURIOUS, even including the TARP DECORATION you decide against it. Surely he would not appreciate a GOOD POLISHED KNIFE even if it STABBED him in the EYE. You instead elect to INTRODUCE YOURSELF.

HISH: hiss

[obliviousRoadie]

KORGRUNDR: Introduce self to QUEST-GIVER.

Action currently unavailable

Your REPTILIAN FRIEND is preventing you from speaking to the FRAIL, INSULTINGLY WEAK OLD MAN other people have dubbed "the QUEST-GIVER". To speak to the OLD MAN, you must attempt to move the SCALY FELLOW out of the way.

KORGRUNDR: Pick up LIZARD COMRADE.

KORGRUNDR: Introduce self to QUEST-GIVER.

I am Korgrundr, Destroyer of Mammoth-bears, Defeater of Gurdgren the Big, and I am hunting for dragons for the Feast of the New Year. I inquire of you - who are you?

[ScreenAcne]

Last night festivities still dance in your head, which is a fancy way of saying you're pretty sure you are still a bit pissed. Against your better judgement you decide that it would be a good idea to look at your DEBUFF BAR even though you loath it with intensity

Gagiblox: Open DEBUFF CHART



Upon opening your surprisingly sparse DEBUFF BAR today you come to realize that you're still drunk or at least hung over. Apparently whatever collection of various foreign fluid you invited into your body last night are still having their effect on your penalty descriptions because you're not even sure what your PISSED status is talking about. You briefly consider the implications that the other two have but being IMMENSELY CONFIDENT in yourself you do the brave thing and hide away your issues and pretend they don't exist.

Gagiblox: Be tomormented by DEBUFFS



Agast. It seems your annoying DEBUFFS refused to be contained by the mere confines of your bar and have escaped to torment you in the form of POORLY CLEANED UP, STANDARD, UNINSPIRED GAME NOTIFICATIONS. A flurry of thoughts march into your skull as you are literally bitten by your personal foils. All of them being about how stupid you must look to the party of freaks you want to impress. Especially considering that they can't see your own debuffs.

Gagiblox: Stumble to the group. Playing off your stunts with wooshing sounds and false mysticism.

[Little Bill]

I am he known as HERMAN, the QUEST-GIVER. I have been waiting for you travelers for MANY MOONS.
A quest of GREAT IMPORTANCE awaits you all.



Kindly step RIGHT THIS WAY, don't let your FREAKISH HEIGHT hit the doorframe. I don't want BERZERKER on my nice clean door.
PLEASE, make yourselves at home. Mi casa es su casa, AS THE YOUNG PEOPLE ARE SAYING.

What a CREEP. The QUEST-GIVER lives in some Unibomber shack with some TERRIBLE YELLOW THING, a FRIGHTENING PUPPET, and scores of SOFTCORE PORNOGRAPHY. In the corner is a RUG for the old man's mattress, a BOTTLE OF BOOZE, and a few BOOKS, TOMES, and MAGAZINES. Opposite the nest, is a DRESSER containing A CAGED YELLOW BEAST, an UGLY VASE PROBABLY, and a considerable SPIDERWEB. Not a QUEST to be seen. Hey, at least now you know where THAT SMELL came from. What will you do?

[JoukaiZachelon]

> Jaedan: Enter hut

As you step inside the overwhelming stench of DEATH consumes your nostrils, you look around for its contents, but some kind of PORNOGRAPHY catches your attention more than anything else.

It seems like two GIRLS are having a good time, or maybe they are two VERY GAY ASIAN BOYS, you're afraid to ask as it might offend Herman's ESOTERIC TASTE.

> Jaedan: Inspect tomes

Who told you those are TOMES? They might be history books or even recipes! But then, not many recipe books have fancy covers like those. You decide to archive one of them to your INVENTORY, it's there as long as you remember about it.

It seems like your fellow COMRADES are entering the hut as well, this feels exciting! What kind of GREAT AND GLORIOUS ADVENTURE awaits you? Perhaps once they're all inside the INSUFFERABLE CLOT will deliver the quest.